


Came New Life

by imagine0314, NorthernGhost



Category: Horizon: Zero Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, Family Feels, Feels, Fluff, Found Family, New Parents, Psychological Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:21:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 134,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26534272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imagine0314/pseuds/imagine0314, https://archiveofourown.org/users/NorthernGhost/pseuds/NorthernGhost
Summary: Eight years ago, Aloy discovered she wasn't the only Sobeck clone.After a perilous journey west to the Port, her younger counterparts now reside alongside her in Meridian, adjusting to a life where death doesn't lurk around every corner.Now 28, second-generation clone Anukai and her sisters Ara and Ashana will have their bonds tested and cemented by the arrival of the newest additions to the family...
Relationships: Aloy & Anukai (OC), Aloy/Talanah Khane Padish, Anukai (OC) & Ara (OC), Ashana (OC)/Sorin (OC), Ikrie/Anukai (OC), Talanah Khane Padish & Ikrie
Comments: 138
Kudos: 60





	1. Mirror Image

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to the next phase of this little AU that started with [Duality](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14110326/chapters/32511735) and has quickly snowballed through 2 mega-fic series, since: [Living Systems](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1218735) and [The Devil Lies in the West](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1593841).
> 
> Don't worry, if you haven't followed since the beginning, the description for this one should catch you up to speed, if you're just looking to hop on now.
> 
> Also something new: this "fic"/work (which is really more like a collection of small fics sorted into chapters) was co-written and co-created with a good friend of mine, imagine0314 who wrote the brilliant [Of Mother and Machine](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18405200/chapters/43590269) in the [Sobeck Women](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1489685) series!
> 
> With our powers combined, we have attempted to create this collection of feels, angst, and fluff that is the continuation of characters from both _Living Systems_ and _The Devil Lies in the West_.
> 
> With that being said, I (NorthernGhost) want to give a quick shout-out to J+Schaeffer, who has followed along with all of my crazy story ideas since day 1 of _Duality_. Thanks so much for following along, and hope you continue to enjoy this one, too!
> 
> \------
> 
> Hey kiddos! It's ya girl, imagine0314. So excited for you to see what we've been working on all summer. This is what happens when two people essentially dare each other into writing a novel by accident. To my long-time readers--I hope you'll join me in diving into Ghost's fun sandbox of continuity. To newcomers--simply sit back and enjoy! 
> 
> This collection draws upon both of our strengths: NorthernGhost's complexity and world-building with a large ensemble cast and my penchant for digging deep into the feels. That said, if you like what either of us have done previously, you're in for a fun ride. 
> 
> _Mirror Image_ by imagine0314

No.

No, this couldn’t be right.

But there was no way GAIA and the three Carja tests she’d taken prior were wrong. She couldn’t help but laugh harshly at her luck, the sound rough and barking. All of these months of _nothing_ and disappointment only for Ikrie to succeed on the first try, and now _this_.

Ikrie.

What was she going to tell Ikrie?

There was no way this could happen. Not now. Not when they’d already gotten what they wanted. Not when she needed to take care of Ikrie more than ever before. They’d celebrated just over a month prior and now here she was, about to ruin everything.

Anukai swallowed thickly, letting her feet guide her down the familiar cobblestone paths of Meridian’s city center as she made her way home. Her jaw tensed. She already knew the answer, knew what had to be done. She’d take the tea and that would be the end of it.

_That would be the end of it._

The redhead shuddered at the thought, stomach churning. She couldn’t...could she? Is this what she _wanted_? She shook her head, causing her braid to sway as she pushed the thoughts out of her mind. It had to be done. Survive. Prevail. There was a reason Banuk families weren’t large, and she’d be a fool to ignore the wisdom in it.

She arrived at their front door sooner than she’d hoped, her right hand shaking as she reached for the handle, though her left remained still as ever. The interior was dark, her own silhouette backlit by the sun outside. It was quiet inside, with no indication that anyone was there.

“Ikrie?” she called, taking off her boots.

Something on the couch in the main room stirred, and Anukai silently kicked herself for waking her mate. She’d been exhausted lately, and for good reason.

The dark-haired woman shifted, sitting upright.

“Anukai, hey,” she said, wiping the sleep from her eyes, pausing as she suddenly seemed to realize something was wrong. “You look pale.”

“I’m fine,” Anukai insisted, a tight smile that didn’t quite match her eyes forming on her face. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. How’re you feeling?”

“Like I could sleep for the next two months and it still wouldn’t be enough,” Ikrie chuckled, “but otherwise, okay.”

“Not feeling sick?” Anukai asked, taking a seat at Ikrie’s side, the dark-haired woman’s hand now in her own. The redhead’s fingers idly traced over the scars that lined the back of her mate’s hand--a lingering reminder of all they’d survived at the Port.

“Not yet, anyway. Aloy came by and dropped off enough ginger to supply a small village this morning after she got back from the market.”

“That’s nice of her,” Anukai said flatly, clearly distracted, her brows furrowed, her lips pulling back in a grimace.

“Anukai, what’s wrong?”

The redhead didn’t answer. This wasn’t fair. She couldn’t put this on Ikrie, not with what she was already giving her. Not with what she was already pouring all of herself into. There was no way this could happen _now_ , not at the same time. Not even if they had family in Meridian now--or whatever they were to each other. There was no choice, and suddenly her mind went white with the realization of what had to happen next, even if it made her want to vomit.

“I’m just--I’m sorry I woke you up is all. You need rest.”

“Anukai--”

“It’s… it’s fine.”

“I know you, and I know something’s wrong.”

“I’m just… I wanted to tell you I was going to drop by Ara’s for a bit. That’s all.”

Ikrie scanned her up and down with a look that nearly made Anukai believe she could see through her to the secret she held within. Her insides were knotted in terror but instead she simply leaned over and kissed Ikrie’s forehead.

“I’ll be back later,” she said, quickly standing and putting her boots back on before Ikrie could protest.

She hated herself for lying, leaving the dark-haired woman reaching for her as she slipped out the door.

\------

Anukai kept her head down to avoid anyone seeing her reddened eyes, removing her Focus so that she could be alone with her thoughts and ignore the calls from Ikrie she knew were sure to follow. She stalked through the market knowing exactly where she needed to go, heading to a small alley in the corner. The merchant didn’t ask any questions, and she didn’t offer any answers, simply handing over the required shards for the bag of tea leaves.

It was fine. It was going to be _fine_.

They already had what they wanted and how could she dishonor Ikrie’s efforts by making this about _her_? She’d just go to Ara’s and do what had to be done, she told herself. Ara was practical. She’d understand, wouldn’t she? Anukai would tell Ikrie they’d gone out drinking and gotten carried away and not show up until morning. She’d hate herself for it and surely draw Ikrie’s ire, but at least it would be done and she wouldn’t have to burden the woman she loved with the knowledge of what had happened.

Before she knew it, she was at Ara’s door, knocking with her shaking right hand and holding the small bag in her left--sure that the metallic appendage wouldn’t lose its grip.

The door opened and Anukai was greeted by her near-reflection. Ara stood, wearing some sort of black, sleeveless top, the pendant Aloy had given her years ago, and sporting her typical hairstyle--the sides buzzed short while the rest was tied back in a fiery topknot.

“Hey,” Ara said fluidly, leaning into the doorframe, “come in.”

She picked up a small glass with some sort of amber liquid in it from the countertop as they entered, taking a sip. Ara gestured to Anukai to take a seat in the main room, the short-haired redhead flopping back casually onto her couch while the Banuk took the seat opposite her. The apartment was sparse but clean, always lacking the tribal flair of so many other homes--much like Ara herself.

“What’s going on, _sis_?” Ara asked, leaning into the moniker with her usual sarcastic edge. “Not like you to drop by unannounced… or without Ikrie. How is she?”

“Ikrie’s fine,” Anukai said softly, keeping her head down.

Ara took another sip, the liquid loosening her tongue.

“Those first couple months are brutal. More reason for me to never do it,” she chuckled. “Wait. Wait. Are you two _fighting_? Is this some lovers’ spat? Because if you’re looking for a couch to sleep on--”

“We’re not fighting,” Anukai growled, the sound causing Ara to pause, her face taking on a more serious demeanor.

“What’s going on?” Ara asked softly, her usual swagger all but evaporated.

A small whimper escaped Anukai, her voice cracking.

“The timing’s all wrong.”

“What timing, Anukai?”

“You know we--I _tried_. For months. And there was nothing. I mean… how many copies of a person can you make before something goes _wrong_?”

“Sure, but you just told me a few weeks back that Ikrie had gone to GAIA and… oh no, she didn’t… she didn’t _lose it_ , did she?”

Anukai shook her head in silence, unable to bring herself to look Ara in the eyes. It would mean facing herself and right now all she wanted to do was lie down in the ice of the Cut and die for what she was about to do.

“So are you going to tell me what’s happening or am I just supposed to guess?” Ara asked, prying again.

Anukai wouldn’t meet her gaze, though Ara noted a small bag dropped at her feet. She quickly swiped it up before the other redhead could react.

“No, don’t, I need tha--”

Before she could finish her sentence, Ara had opened the small pouch, taking a whiff of the earthy scent inside. Her face went stony and solemn, a sudden sobriety taking hold of her.

“What are you doing with this, Anukai?”

The other redhead looked away from her, eyes red and glassy.

“You know what it is?” she responded, swallowing nervously.

“I do,” Ara confirmed, offering no other explanation; like so much of her life before meeting Anukai, she kept her secrets close--they were hers alone. “But you didn’t answer my question.”

“I already told you,” Anukai said, voice cracking through gritted teeth. “Timing’s all wrong.”

“Please don’t tell me this is for Ikrie, you two seemed so happy--”

“It’s _not_ for Ikrie, Ara,” the former Banuk said, a tear dripping down her cheek. “It’s for _me_.”

Ara quickly sat back, the realization dawning on her as a sick feeling flooded her gut.

“But you said… but it wasn’t… that’s why Ikrie--”

“You think I don’t know that?” Anukai shot back, and for the first time, Ara met her face to face, seeing the fear in her eyes. “It was… the last time I… _tried_ just after she decided to go to GAIA. I thought maybe it was a last chance that wouldn’t work and I’d accept it wouldn’t be me. Then we got lucky and it worked for her the first time and I… I didn’t think… I was so _happy_ and so distracted that I didn’t even notice I’d missed that month until a few weeks later… until today.”

Ara stood, bag still in her hand while she tossed back the rest of her drink with a shudder. She walked to the kitchen, quickly refilling it, ignoring the shake in her hand as she did so. Anukai followed her, unwilling to let the item out of her sight.

The short-haired redhead gulped another mouthful of alcohol, setting the bag on the counter before she leaned back away from it, eyeing the contents suspiciously.

“So you came here to do _this_.”

“There’s no other choice,” Anukai said quietly. “Ikrie’s… she’s already doing this incredible thing for us _because I couldn’t_ , Ara. And I-I can’t ruin that. There’s no way we could… not at the same time.”

Ara looked her up and down, her gaze inadvertently settling on the former Banuk’s middle. It left Anukai feeling exposed, a raw nerve laid bare for her mirror image to judge.

“...Is it… like _us_?” Ara asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Anukai shook her head.

“No. No. That was… never what I wanted. It’s why we... _arranged_ things the way we did with Bekan.”

“No more copies?”

Anukai shook her head.

“No. Bekan... _contributed_... and Ikrie was okay with accepting GAIA’s help to make it all happen. But I… I was too scared of what it might mean, considering…” she said, gesturing vaguely between them.

Ara released a breath, she could hear her heartbeat in her ears though she wasn’t quite sure where the buzz of the alcohol ended and her own feelings began. Was she relieved? She couldn’t quite tell, but the idea that this _potential_ wasn’t just another copy tugged at something deep in her chest. Her lips pressed into a thin line before she took another breath.

“What do you want?” Ara asked, her voice firm but without malice.

Anukai looked up at her.

“What…?”

“I asked what _you_ want. You keep saying there’s no choice, but there’s _always_ a choice. Tell me what you’re thinking before I have to crack that Banuk ice myself.”

Anukai took a deep breath, feeling like she might be sick. What did she _want_? She’d barely allowed herself time to process it.

“I keep thinking about Aloy and Elisabet,” she finally admitted. “I don’t want to have the same regrets, and I feel like… in some way I owe it to this to myself, this… family, this lineage, whatever… it goes on. That maybe we’re more than copies with blood on our hands. I wanted to do _better_. You know I _tried_ for months and months. You know I wanted this.”

“Past tense?” Ara asked, her gaze now decidedly more protective, never once leaving Anukai.

She ignored the shudder in her chest, doing her best to stay neutral for the distraught redhead’s sake.

“I don’t _know_.”

“Yes you do.”

“No, I _don’t_!”

“You do, Anukai, I can read it on you. I know your face as well as I know my own.”

“I just… can’t,” Anukai said sadly, hanging her head. “It’s too much at once.”

Ara huffed and took another sip of her drink before setting the glass down and opening the small bag. She took a scoop of the dried leaves and added it to a sachet, before quickly filling her kettle with water and setting it on a small hotplate to heat. Anukai’s green-gold eyes followed Ara’s movements silently while she grabbed for a mug, placing the tea inside.

After several minutes the kettle whistled and Ara poured the water in, letting the sachet of tea leaves steep before removing it and sliding the mug in front of Anukai.

“W-what are you doing?”

“It’s going to be a hell of a night but I’ll stay here with you, I promise. And I’ll cover for you in the morning--I’ll tell Ikrie whatever you want. It’s going to take a few hours and it won’t be pretty so if you’re doing this, do it now.”

“But I--”

“Take it,” Ara insisted, picking up the mug and holding it closer to her. “If this is what you want, then take it.”

She moved closer, the tension between them palpable.

“I don’t--”

“What do you want, Anukai?” Ara asked again, pressing closer, the scent of earthy bitterness wafting from the mug.

“I don’t know!”

“Yes you do,” Ara said.

The shorter-haired redhead’s eyes burned with an intensity Anukai rarely saw.

“If you _don’t want this_ \--if you have _no choice_ \--then take it!” Ara seethed, pressing the mug nearly to Anukai’s face.

“No!”

The braided redhead issued an animal-like growl, batting the mug away and sending it shattering on the ground, the contents spilling across the kitchen floor. She froze for a second, expecting Ara to scream at her for breaking the ceramic. Instead, Ara stepped forward softly, wrapping her arms around Anukai’s shoulders.

After a moment, Ara could feel the slow heavy shake of Anukai’s muted sobs in her embrace. Her grip tightened, the two of them standing and swaying in her kitchen.

Ara pulled back slightly, her forehead pressed against Anukai’s.

“I knew what you wanted. Now you do, too.”

“I don’t know how we can do this,” Anukai whispered.

Ara pulled her head back.

“Anukai, look at me. Look at me.” Green-gold eyes reflected their twin image. “You have Ikrie. You’ve got Aloy and Talanah. And you’ve got Ashana and me--whatever… whatever it is we are to each other. You think any of us are going to let you fall?”

A moment of heavy silence fell over them as the eyes before her grew more watery.

“Thank you,” Anukai finally said, choking on the words, tears trickling once again.

Ara brushed aside the salty streaks with her thumb.

“Now, I’m going to throw the rest of this tea out and you’re going to go home and tell that woman of yours that you’re having twins.”

“Twins? But--”

“Close enough,” Ara smirked.

\------

Anukai had lingered at Ara’s apartment for another hour or so, helping her clean up the mess she’d made before hugging the short-haired redhead once again and leaving for the night. The sun had finally dipped below the horizon as the braided redhead made her way home, and though her nerves were buzzing with the knowledge of what she was about to tell Ikrie, she felt lighter somehow.

She opened the door slowly, not wanting to startle her mate, only to find Ikrie had practically sprinted for the entrance, nearly tackling her with a full-bodied embrace.

“Great Banukai, you had me so scared. I tried to call but you and Ara but neither of you answered and then I tried Aloy and she hadn’t seen you. I was so worried after this afternoon,” Ikrie said, her words spilling over themselves as she held Anukai so tightly they both struggled for air.

“It’s okay, I’m okay,” Anukai assured, her voice soft and gentle. “I’m so, so, sorry.”

The two parted just enough for Anukai to remove her boots, the pair moving into the main room and taking a seat together on the couch. Ikrie refused to remove her arms from around Anukai, holding her still and anchoring her to what came next, even if she didn’t realize it.

Anukai turned to face the dark-haired woman, her right hand snaking to Ikrie’s hip.

“You’re… you’re happy about _this_ , right?” Anukai asked, her gaze settling low to where she knew something small and wondrous was at work.

“Of course I am. I asked _you_ first, remember? And... it’s what we wanted. You’re not… changing your mind, are you?” Ikrie asked her with a vulnerability that shot straight through Anukai’s chest.

“No, _no_ ,” Anukai insisted, “never.”

“Talk to me, Anukai. Whatever it is, I’ll listen.”

The redhead bit her lip until she tasted iron, finally lifting her face, meeting the icy-gray of Ikrie’s eyes.

Anukai breathed in deeply.

“What would you say to two?”


	2. Homecoming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original draft by imagine0314, edited/revised/tag-teamed by NorthernGhost

The sound of a knock at the door prompted the dirty blonde man’s knee to cease its anxious bouncing, his gaze lifting from the still full glass of amber liquid on the table before him to the inside of the wooden portal. Swallowing anxiously, Sorin rose from the table, a shiver running down his spine as a light feeling rose in his chest, returning in full force for the first time since he had received the light-message earlier that day.  


It was the same feeling that appeared every time she returned home.  


He paused before the door to rake his hand through his hair and the scruff on his face before quickly reaching for the handle, twisting it to reveal a sight he had never tired of, once, in the past ten years.  


“Ashana.”  


She stood before him in the open doorway, dressed in a slightly damp, black cloak tied at her throat but left partially open at the front to reveal the fur-lined leather tunic and black-dyed leather leggings beneath, her fiery mane hanging over the top of it, stretching well past her shoulders. Her green-gold gaze instantly met his blue as she shifted the bag slung over one shoulder.  


“Hello, my love,” she greeted, the natural flow of her native tongue falling into place with ease, the words coming more comfortably than the language she adopted while away.  


The smallest tick of a smile lingered at the corners of her lips, more than she would permit for nearly anyone but him and practically invisible to just as many, but Sorin caught it immediately. As he took a step back, the redhead stepped past the threshold, swinging her bag off her shoulder and toward the wooden floor with a sigh. Only once he had pushed the door closed behind her did she allow herself to lean forward, wrapping her arms around Sorin’s waist and tilting her head into his chest.  


“I missed you,” the redhead admitted, breathing in the warm scent of her mate. “My sisters and the rest of the family send their regards.”  


The blonde nodded, placing one hand to her side and prompting her to glance up at him before she inhaled deeply and released him from her grasp. As she did, Sorin began tending to her things in the quiet way he often did: putting her bag aside to be unpacked later while he took her cloak and placed it on a hook beside the door. As he turned from it, he gestured for Ashana to sit in the empty chair beside his at the table, a glass filled with the same dark liquor as his own already waiting before it.  


The redhead noted that the offered seat was closest to the fireplace, which sported a small but welcomingly warm blaze. She took his offer, removing her outer tunic before sliding into the seat with a soft groan and beginning to remove her boots.  


“I trust your trip went well?” Sorin asked softly, falling into his own seat, once again.  


Ashana’s yearly trips to Meridian had become commonplace over the past eight years, each journey keeping her away for a month or two at a time, but he understood their importance to her. Though she had never said it aloud, he was intimately aware of her desire to stay connected to the other women, their origins shared and their lives forever intertwined after her longest, and most fateful, trip westward.  


The redhead removed her second boot, grimacing slightly as she stretched and rolled her foot, before placing it on the ground and turning to take her glass, sipping at her drink before sighing gratefully, the soft leather of her seat giving further with a groan as she settled deeper into it, the relief visible in her posture and mannerisms.  


“It did,” she said, taking another swallow. “My sister’s mate is expecting their first.”  


Sorin’s eyebrows raised slightly as he took a sip from his own glass.  


“Ara or Anukai?”  


Ashana let the next sip of alcohol sit warm in her chest as she swirled the already half-empty glass slowly.  


“Anukai. Her mate, Ikrie, will bear their child. Ara is... not so inclined.”  


“Ah,” he said thoughtfully. “You are happy for them?”  


“Of course,” she said, maintaining her typical steadfast demeanor as she nodded resolutely. “Ikrie will be a strong mother. She is well matched to Anukai.”  


“You will be an aunt, then. A new role for you,” Sorin added, gauging her reaction over the top of his drink.  


The redhead paused with her own glass halfway to her lips, her eyes seeming to slip out of focus for a moment as she stared vacantly over her mate’s head.  


“I suppose I will be,” Ashana mused, her eyes betraying how much she enjoyed the prospective title for a moment before she blinked, the alertness returning to them and hiding the momentary glimpse of her thoughts.  


The world was harsh and hard and her people knew all too well it would do no good to speak much of a child that was not yet in its mother’s arms. Too much could happen between now and then and she would not allow herself to grow too eager over a life not yet realized.  


She quickly shrugged it away, as well, rotating her neck until it cracked.  


At the sound of her cracking joints, including one particularly painful one that prompted the redhead’s face to contort into a grimace, Sorin rose to his feet, moving to stand behind her. Neither said a word, but Ashana slid higher in her seat just before strong hands dug into the tense muscle that had protested so strongly a moment ago. The silence continued to hang over them as he worked, his only indication of approval her quiet sounds of relief as he kneaded along her shoulders and the top of her spine.  


“You are tired,” Sorin said softly, never ceasing his movements.  


Ashana finished the last of her drink, setting it down on the polished wooden table before stilling her mate’s hand with her own. His hands slowly slid from her shoulders as she stood, turning about her chair to stand before him, one hand coming to rest in the center of his chest.  


“Yes,” she admitted, “I am, but I have had trouble these last weeks sleeping without you.”  


The redhead reached with her opposite hand to curl behind her mate’s neck, guiding him toward her before catching his lips with her own. She kissed him hard, making up for lost time, her movements strong and sure. Sorin quickly returned her enthusiasm, matching it until they were both breathless.  


“I can— _help_ —with that,” he said, allowing the slightest hint of coyness to lace his tone.  


Ashana instantly pushed him back before guiding him toward their bedroom with a ferocity that still surprised him after all these years. Sorin followed her pull at his arm, skidding to a stop before her at the side of their bed, the redhead quickly spinning to face him and stripping off his shirt, her own following suit as she swung him before her and pressed him backward onto the straw-filled mattress.  


Their moves were like choreography, well-practiced and understood after years of learning their roles.  


The redhead quickly clambered atop the mattress, straddling her mate’s hips and offering a sly smirk in satisfaction as found she had clearly garnered his interest. She leaned forward over him, her lips trailing his jaw and throat, eliciting a rumble from deep in his chest.  


He was happy to let the fire of the woman he loved consume him.  


Sorin’s hand came to rest just above her hip, his thumb gently rubbing over the circular scar there. He let her have her way for another minute or two before flipping their positions, her fingers quickly reaching for his belt with desperate movements. She could feel his smirk against her skin as he leaned low and whispered in her ear.  


“I missed you, too, my love.”  


\------  


The very next day, the couple quickly settled into their routine, once again, the redhead returning to the other Light-Talkers while Sorin put his skills to use at his woodworking shop. Every time Ashana returned from Meridian, the others eagerly awaited the news and developments she brought. The changes and discoveries were somewhat slower than they had been the first few years following the incident at the Port, however, with information more easily shared from one coast to another after GAIA’s network had been more fully established.  


At times, the redhead missed the excitement of seeking out the MINERVA towers to manually synch them to said network, as they had provided a generally less life-threatening adventure than the last time she had gone in search of lost signals, but they had been yet another reason to leave home for weeks at a time.  


“How long until GAIA believes we will be able to reach across the great water?” one of the more eager Light-Talkers asked as soon as the group had been called into a crowd around Ashana.  


“She is hopeful that it will be soon,” the redhead confirmed, nodding. “She has heard word from her machines that crossed it and returned that several towers do exist on the far coast.”  


“If they have been there for all these years,” one of the older members chimed in, his arms folded tightly before his chest, “why have we not been able to reach them? Is there perhaps no one there to reach back?”  


The redhead’s jaw worked tensely as her gaze met the older man’s, neither willing to relent first.  


“It has been nearly eight years, Ashana,” he said.  


“And you of all people should know that things do not change instantly,” the redhead shot back. “The water does not wash the beach away with one wave. A head of hair does not turn white at once.”  


The elder man opened his mouth to argue back, but the younger, dark-haired man beside him stepped between the two.  


“Enough. We continue our work as we have. Those in Meridian and the Port rely on us, as we do on them.”  


The group began to disperse, the elder man turning on his heel to leave after one last glare toward the redhead, while the first, eager member approached her.  


“Ashana, if you have a moment of your time to spare,” he said, his hands wringing nervously before him until the redhead nodded and they quickly fell still, fingers threading between each other. “Did you perhaps hear mention of whether the ancient Light Tomb we discovered was of use to GAIA?”  


The redhead nodded, a slight glint in her eye as the young man grinned uncontrollably for a moment before attempting to control his reaction.  


“Do not feel ashamed,” she said. “You have done well. She is very grateful.”  


“She… she told you?”  


“She did.”  


The young man let out a shaky sigh before the sound of someone calling his name from across the space prompted him to quickly offer a nod to her and scurry after them. Ashana watched him go for a moment before shaking her head, turning to make her way toward her familiar workspace: a room set by itself, with a series of displays about it, all of which came to life as she entered and tapped the Focus beside her ear.  


Other than Sorin, her work and the room in which she did it was the only constant that had maintained from her life before she left eight years ago.  


It was easy for her to lose herself in the world of bright lights, images, and glyphs. Now, though, the language she had so often only read, but rarely spoke aloud to anyone other than the other Light-Talkers, carried a different weight, and she sometimes found herself hearing the voices of those she was most familiar hearing it from in her head.  


Alone in her work room, a small smile tugged at her lips as she read a line about some ancient source of knowledge that one could ask any question to and the voice that rang in her mind’s ear was distinctly Anukai’s. It was similar to her own, for reasons they were well aware of, but she could hear the smallest perceptible difference that told her it was the other redhead’s.  


The remainder of her day passed quickly, and she soon found herself glancing toward the square of light behind her to see the glyphs telling her it was very near sunset, already. With a deep breath, she tapped her Focus, closing the fields of light around her before turning to exit the room, grabbing her coat from where she had neatly folded it on an ancient, metal desk near the door.  


The other Light-Talkers were also leaving their underground cave, or bunker as Ara had taught her, many of them talking casually, seemingly discussing a trip to one of the nearby pubs. None of them turned to invite Ashana, but she did not engage or inquire either, instead making her way determinedly along a familiar path through the winding streets of the bustling town until she spotted a familiar, open front to a building ahead.  


The redhead maintained her heading, slipping by others carrying items to or from the nearby market before coming to a stop at the edge of the wide opening at the front of the building she had seen a moment ago, leaning her right shoulder against the outer frame.  


She and Sorin rarely spoke about their more mundane activities, though Ashana often admired the craftsmanship of his wares. Her post at the edge of his store’s main doorway was a common one when her work was done, her eyes locking on the blonde man as he carefully whittled away at a hunk of wood, his skilled hands carving away the rough edges into something much smoother and more detailed. Currently, she couldn’t tell exactly what it was intended to become, as he appeared to be early in the process, but she was certain it would be just as elegant as the other, completed wares on display.  


As he finished carving off a thin strip of wood, Sorin stood up straight, sighing and rubbing at his brow with the back of one hand. His gaze glanced toward the opening at the other side of the space before a small grin tugged at his lips.  


“How long have you been there?”  


The redhead shrugged.  


“Does it matter?”  


The blonde laughed softly, carefully stowing his knife with the rest of his tools before removing the leather apron from around his neck and hanging it on a peg on one side of the shop. Ashana pushed away from the doorframe, stepping outside before Sorin pulled the folding, wooden doors closed across it, locking them in place with a heavy, iron lock and slipping the key to it into his pocket.  


“Shall we?”  


The two of them turned to begin making their way back toward their small home, each of them remaining quiet as they walked. Sorin had never begged for Ashana’s attention, unlike the way the other boys in the village had growing up, but he had felt it every time he was near her. She had always been regarded as _special_ , as _different_ , and far too many were eager to seek a piece of those feelings, make her the object of their desires, but he had never pushed, never pleaded, simply keeping his respectful proximity, only occasionally allowing his gaze to rest upon her and meet her own in return.  


The day he found hers upon him, first, had changed things.  


She’d known then that there was something about him, a sort of quiet dignity that colored his actions. He was strong, capable, and intelligent, though he preferred to work with his hands rather than seek to be a Light-Talker, like so many of the others that attempted to impress her.  


The dark-haired boy nearest to her had been talking endlessly about what had first seemed to be a story about a single hunt, but as the time had dragged on it had to have been multiple, although Ashana had stopped truly listening after the first few sentences, when it was clear he had not expected her to respond, but simply act impressed.  


Her gaze had occasionally drifted to the blonde boy at a nearby table in the pub, recognizing him from this similar dance of gazes they had played for some time. This time, however, she found hers remaining on him, rather than attempting to turn back to the face still talking into her ear. The blonde was currently facing his friend, who he had arrived with earlier, but after a few moments, his gaze seemed to turn from the dark-haired boy that shared his table, blue eyes meeting hers.  


Both of them had remained in that position for a moment, refusing to look away, until the redhead had risen from her seat, slipping away from her most recent suitor as he was mid-sentence. Sorin’s friend had seemed more surprised than he when she came to a stop beside their table, her knuckles gently rapping on its surface.  


“You, boy,” she had said, maintaining the eye contact she had held across the room, “buy me a drink.”  


Instead of recoiling in surprise, like his friend had, or in indignation, like so many of the others likely would have, he simply rose from his seat, nodding toward the wooden bar and leading the way to it. It hadn’t mattered to Ashana at the time that the amber liquor he ordered her was not one she typically drank, but she had grown to like it in the years since.  


Its taste reminded her of him, now.  


It had taken less than a year before they were joined in their union ceremony and she couldn’t imagine her existence since, or to come, without him.  


As they returned home, each of them shirking their boots and coats before moving to begin preparing food, Sorin intentionally slipped before her, bringing her to a stop and prompting her to glance up at him.  


“Does something trouble you?”  


She shook her head.  


“You looked deep in thought.”  


The redhead’s lips twitched into a small smirk, a glint flashing in her gold-green eyes.  


“They are good thoughts.”  


\--------------  


The next few weeks were filled with the continued bliss of reunion: good liquor and food, satisfying hunts, long nights by the fire, and even longer nights spent together in their bed. After, she would lay her head against the muscle of his chest, listening to the slowing of his pulse, allowing her own to do the same before sleep took them both.  


Some nights, he would read to her while they laid in bed, though she would never ask it of him herself. Instead, he took the opportunity whenever she seemed restless. As she listened to his honeyed speech, his voice deep and even, the energy in her limbs and mind stilled, trickling down her spine and spreading throughout her body.  


There were never so many words spoken between them as this, while the only indicators of her enjoyment were often the occasional low hum that escaped her or the feeling of the tension releasing from her muscles, her weight settling more firmly against him. Sorin had always tended to her without complaint or order, content to do so of his own accord, it seemed--an adoration that had never ceased to feel genuine and comforting to her.  


Ashana’s eyes slid closed, enjoying the sound of his voice, while her mind drifted back across their shared past.  


After several minutes of winding through memories, she landed on a recollection of Sorin reading to her years ago, her body wracked with still-fresh pain after her escape from the Port with Anukai and Aloy and their respective mates. She had slept for days upon her return, only interrupted by Sorin’s gentle ministrations. He had ensured her only just recently healed wounds remained clean while she hissed and kept her fed despite her protests, her nights filled with the sound of his voice at her side. He would often recite some collection of old texts or another in the silken tones of their shared tongue while she tried her best to hide her discomfort.  


He had asked nothing of her, then, knowing that if she wished to speak of what had happened that she would.  


Eventually, after yet another night of restlessness and pain, she had relented.  


She recalled how he had slipped into their bed, certain she was finally asleep, only for her to grasp him tightly from behind, pulling herself against his frame even as her body had ached and protested at the motion and the touch. The words had poured from her in a steady stream until they were exhausted, detailing every blow and drop of blood spilled.  


Sorin had said nothing, but turned in her grasp to pull her closer. He had felt her stifled cries against his chest, though he had not offered her any pity, knowing she would detest it, nor did he commit the disrespect of implying it had happened at all, in the time since.  


Ashana returned to the present, stirring in their bed as she finally surfaced from the memories she had entered under the influence of her mate’s voice. She turned toward Sorin, wrapping an arm around his bare torso, prompting him to pause before closing his book and turning off the small lamp. He settled lower in the bed, drawing closer to her as his hands began to softly card through her hair, the motion bringing with it an even deeper relaxation.  


Within mere moments, she drifted off to sleep, a single thought bringing the smallest of smiles to her lips:  


“ _I knew there was a reason I chose you._ ”  


\------  


The glow of her Focus caught her eye the next afternoon, its pulsing light indicating a message was waiting for her. She’d taken it off since returning home for the day, and while it was not entirely uncommon for someone to attempt to reach her in the evening, she glanced at it suspiciously.  


Her work had not involved anything particularly pressing, and other than her fellow Light-Talkers, there was only one group who regularly contacted her.  


Ashana picked up the small metal triangle from the table in front of the fireplace, placing it along the side of her right ear. The web of lights and glyphs appeared around her, bringing with it a blue rectangle that told her it was not an active call, but one left several minutes ago, when she had not noticed the device. Tapping the shape with two fingers, she quickly paused as the voice on the other end began to speak, her eyes growing wider and wider as she listened.  


“ _Hey Ash, it’s Anukai. I, uh, I was so happy to have you here to celebrate Ikrie’s news last month--and... and don’t worry, she and the baby are fine--_ ”  


“Ashana?”  


The redhead’s expression was distant and wide, too distracted to have heard her own name called out to her.  


“ _\--but... I know this is going to sound crazy, and it is, but… I wanted to tell you myself before Ara or Aloy or anyone else--_ ”  


Ashana’s hand shot to her mouth in an uncharacteristic fashion, the redhead slowly sinking into one of the chairs at the table as the message played, the source of Anukai’s nervous, hopeful tone, quickly becoming apparent.  


How had this happened?  


Anukai had told her of her struggle and lack of success, and now, suddenly, she was confronted with a reality that hit all too close to home.  


“Ashana? Are you all right?” Sorin asked, placing a hand on her shoulder as he took the other seat beside hers. “What did it say?”  


She removed the Focus, placing it back on the table gingerly, her fingers showing the faintest hints of tremors, which she quickly hid by curling them into a fist beside the device.  


“It was my sister, Anukai,” Ashana began, blinking as if she still couldn’t believe it.  


Sorin leaned in, but said nothing, waiting. She would speak when she wished to, and he refused to push.  


“She is pregnant,” the redhead said, a newfound ache in her chest. “It would seem I am to be an aunt twice over… this time by blood.”  


She shook her head softly, a strange sensation settling in her limbs. It had been one thing to picture Ikrie bringing her sister’s child into the world, but it was another to picture her exact twin image doing so.  


“Two, now?” Sorin asked, not vocally acknowledging the timing or the complications inherent in it, but instead continuing carefully, his words measured and direct. “That is wonderful news.”  


Ashana hummed in the affirmative but remained silent, her expression unreadable as she slowly stretched her fingers flat from the fist they had formed moments ago, pressing her palm against the smooth surface of the table.  


“She struggled for this one, yes?”  


“Yes.”  


“Then strength and perseverance must run deep in the blood,” he noted before pausing, his tone adopting hints of concern. “You are also happy for this one?”  


“Yes,” she said, her tone even. “Very.”  


Sorin’s hand came to rest briefly on her knee and Ashana felt her own quickly slide over it, seemingly of its own will, although she didn’t move to pull it away, after.  


“I am certain that if she is anything like you, she will be well suited to it.”  


Ashana froze.  


Well suited?  


_Like her?_  


What had he meant by that?  


She knew her mate well enough to know he never wasted words, never bothered with deception or misspoken intent.  


He never said _anything_ unless he meant it.  


“You... do?” she asked hesitantly, her fingers beginning to squeeze at his hand more firmly.  


Sorin simply nodded and Ashana swore she caught the briefest of grins on his face, though it disappeared before she could look again. With it, though, she felt one of her own beginning to build, starting in her chest before travelling along her arteries to her face, an intense warmth borne with the flush of blood.  


“I have no doubt.”


	3. Doctor's Orders

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By imagine0314

Anukai breathed slowly through her nose, attempting to center herself as she raised her head from the bucket she was currently buried in. She wiped at her face with a cool, wet cloth Ikrie had left her and took a sip of water from the glass beside it before swirling the liquid in her mouth and spitting it back out.

The last six weeks had been a blur.

Some days, it almost didn’t feel real. This was not one of those days, and Anukai found herself incredibly grateful that there were several weeks separating her and Ikrie as she couldn’t imagine them both feeling this way at the same time.

The redhead stood and looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. She wore nothing but the thin fabric undershirt and shorts she’d been sleeping in just an hour earlier and she couldn’t help but lift the shirt with her right hand, conspicuously avoiding her left while standing in profile to see if her silhouette now betrayed the cause of her illness. After several minutes of close inspection, she could only detect the slightest curve in the right light. Surely, Ikrie would notice, but it meant she didn’t have to let the whole of Meridian in on her secret just quite yet. She quietly dreaded the day when the city’s gossip would find its way to speculate on how they were now expecting two.

Anukai smoothed her shirt back into place and exited, padding her way back to Ikrie, who still laid in their shared bed, gray pre-dawn light just barely peeking through the window. Anukai tried to quietly slip back into the sheets, unwilling to disturb the dark-haired woman. She looked to have fallen back asleep but quickly dispelled the notion when the redhead heard her speak.

“Feeling better?”

“Enough,” Anukai sighed. “I just want to lay down.”

“I know the feeling,” Ikrie said, her expression full of understanding. She gestured toward Anukai, opening her arms to allow the redhead to fit in her embrace.

“At least _you’re_ over that part,” Anukai grumbled, gratefully accepting her place in Ikrie’s arms as she tucked her head into the other woman’s shoulder, feeling her mate’s fingers gently card through her hair.

“You’ll get through it, too,” Ikrie assured. “You’re the strongest person I know.”

Anukai nodded into her shoulder, draping her right hand over her wife’s middle and feeling the roundness that had begun to take a more definitive shape than her own. She shrugged her left arm behind her body, careful not to let the metal touch the swell that was their son.

“I don’t know how I’d do this without you,” the redhead admitted, trying to stave off the return of her nausea.

“You’ll never have to find out,” Ikrie replied quietly, now stroking her hands slowly along Anukai’s back. “Sleep now.”

It was all the permission Anukai needed. She blinked heavily once or twice, the heavy beat of Ikrie’s heart beneath her ear putting her mind at ease.

The world went black.

\------

Anukai woke, the feeling of something pressed warm and soft at her jaw easing her from sleep.

“Mm,” she hummed, equally happy to receive Ikrie’s kiss as she was to no longer feel sick.

“You like that?” Ikrie teased, causing Anukai’s eyes to finally crack open, revealing the green-gold within.

Her mate was clearly more awake than she had been, having not had such a distressing morning as Anukai, herself.

The redhead simply grinned as Ikrie continued, soft and slow along her throat until meeting her lips. Anukai met Ikrie’s advances with her own and she felt the dark-haired woman shift, her weight now on top of the redhead.

“Good morning to me,” Anukai remarked, pulling a wide smile from Ikrie who blushed behind shaggy, dark hair.

Ikrie settled her legs on either side of Anukai’s hips leaning over her.

“You have anywhere you need to be?”

The redhead shook her head no, prompting Ikrie to pull off the loose shirt she was wearing. Anukai regarded her changed body with awe, her usual desire for her mate now mixed with a far deeper appreciation. The dark-haired woman placed another kiss at the pulse point in Anukai’s throat before hitching the redhead’s right hand up to her waist, letting her fingertips trail the pale skin there. Ikrie groaned her approval before reaching for Anukai’s left hand, prepared to do the same, when Anukai suddenly jerked her metallic hand back, causing the both of them to sharply inhale and pause.

“You okay?” Ikrie asked, her brow creased in concern.

Anukai grimaced before quickly repositioning her metal appendage, placing it away from Ikrie’s middle and instead settling it low on her thigh.

“Y-yeah. Fine,” Anukai stammered, quickly chasing the reply with a kiss of her own to prove her point

If she could only lose herself in Ikrie, it would be true, she told herself. She would be fine.

Anukai growled against the press of Ikrie’s body, eyes closed tightly to shut away the niggling feeling gnawing at her.

She was fine.

She was _fine_.

_She was fine._

She was anything but.

\------

Ara woke, alone in her bed and feeling tired and drained. She felt sick, stomach churning and quickly braced for the oncoming headache that usually accompanied a hangover, though to her surprise, after several minutes her head remained fine while her nausea worsened. She peered ruefully past the edge of her gray blanket, searching for a reason. Had she been drinking last night? It wouldn’t be the first time she’d had enough to erase the memory. The redhead glanced around, looking to her bedside table and floor but found no evidence that she’d overindulged.

She had little time to consider the cause further before her eyes shot open wide, a terrible feeling rising in her throat. Before she knew what she was doing she was on her feet and sprinting down the hall to the bathroom.

She retched into the basin, body hunched over the edges for several minutes before her muscles finally relaxed and she fell back to the cool tile of the floor, her black sleeveless shirt sticking to her skin with sweat.

“The fuck,” she muttered to herself.

Ara laid there for a moment, pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes until she saw stars, finally removing them when the pressure built too high. She caught a glance of the familiar lengthy scar that ran along her left forearm, the one that reminded her of the night so many years ago, deep in the facility in the desert where she and Anukai-- _whatever they were to each other_ \--had both nearly died.

Suddenly something clicked in Ara’s mind, realization dawning on her.

“Dammit, Anukai, this is _not_ what I needed this morning,” she muttered, though a second later she found herself sympathetic.

It must have been a particularly rough instance if the bleedthrough was _this_ bad. It had been six weeks since the evening Anukai had sat in her living room carrying a bag of _that_ tea and Ara nearly gagged at the memory of its pungent, earthy scent and all that came with it.

The redhead considered for a moment whether it was worth telling Anukai how much she did _not_ appreciate her rude awakening, but she knew deep down it was something none of them could truly control. The fact that it hadn’t been a problem before now was probably testament to the other redhead’s ability to shunt aside whatever she needed to in order to survive.

Ara shuddered, trying desperately not to think about the implications of whether or not their connection would lead to any other unpleasant sensations. After a few more seconds she brushed it off, deciding it was something far too personal to transfer much more than it already had. It wasn’t like she’d broadcasted out anything she chose to lock too deeply, like most of her past.

She picked herself up off the floor, quickly peeling off her clothes and cleaning up. When she was satisfied, she returned to her room to procure a new set of clothing, donning a thin, off-white cotton top with dark leggings. She reached into a drawer for a tie, pulling her hair back into its usual topknot before also grabbing the pendant she kept on a thin leather cord. The bone laid heavy on her chest when she slipped it on, though she was always grateful for its weight.

Ara glanced back to her arm again, something about it drawing her eye as she traced along the scar with her fingers. She couldn’t stop thinking about Anukai.

_She couldn’t stop thinking about Anukai._

\------

The braided redhead sighed. She didn’t know why she was suddenly worried about it after all this time, but she knew there was only one person in Meridian she could ask. Anukai barely paid attention to her surroundings as she walked along the long since memorized path to Vansa’s practice.

The building was warm and inviting, though cramped with tools and medical supplies and herbs of all sorts and origins, looking like some merger of a healer and an Oseram tinker. Anukai stepped across the threshold into the main room to find Vansa emerging from her curtained off back room.

“Take two of these capsules of powdered Wild Ember morning, midday, and night. Return or send for me if the swelling gets worse,” she said, administering one final look over the middle aged Carja woman she had finished attending to.

The woman nodded gratefully before exiting, when Vansa turned and noticed the redhead.

“Anukai! Haven’t seen you here in awhile. How are you?”

Anukai shuffled uneasily, crossing her arms in front of herself and hoping she wasn’t too obvious, even if her morning reflection had shown her she wasn’t.

“I’m-I’m good. Do you have a minute? Can we talk? I um...I had some questions. About the arm.”

Vansa’s face betrayed her curiosity, bright green eyes taking in the redhead before her.

“Yeah, sure, of course. Come on back,” she said, pulling open the curtain to her smaller exam room.

Anukai walked forward, sitting on the table reserved for patients. Her leg bounced nervously and the fingers of her left hand tapped at the surface beneath her.

“So what brings you by? Everything okay?” Vansa asked, pushing up the sleeves of her brown jacket as she took a seat on a small stool in front of the Banuk.

“Um, can you just check it?” Anukai asked with uncharacteristic shyness.

“Yeah of course,” Vansa agreed, taking the redhead’s metallic appendage in hand.

Vansa pulled out a device Anukai recognized, causing her to shudder.

“No pain this time. I promise.”

The healer checked over the redhead’s arm, placing the device at certain spots and bending the joints carefully. After several minutes, Vansa lifted her eyes to meet Anukai’s.

“Looks good to me. Are you having any trouble with it?”

“No… I just… everything’s under my control, right?”

“Why, have you been getting erratic responses? I can recalibrate…” Vansa offered, suddenly concerned.

“It’s fine, I just… I need to know if it can be… more _delicate_ than usual.”

Vansa looked Anukai up and down and for a moment the redhead faltered, biting her lip in anxiety.

“Anukai, I know that face. From _all_ of you. Spill.”

The redhead’s face burned deep crimson. “Ikrie’s pregnant.”

“Congratulations--” Vansa began.

“--I am too.”

Vansa retained a professional composure at the news, though she suddenly went silent.

“And this is all good news, right?” Vansa asked, her face suddenly stony and serious.

She’d been in the practice of being a healer long enough to know it wasn’t always the case.

“Y-yes. _Yes_. Definitely. Good news.”

“Well, great,” Vansa said, letting out a sigh of relief. “I’m really happy for you guys. But, what does this have to do with your arm?”

Anukai stilled. “I don’t want to hurt her. Or our children. I just… I just keep thinking what if I can’t control it? What if I do something by accident? In my sleep? Out of reflex? Or fear? I won’t be able to forgive myself if… and I just don’t know. They’re going to be so small and fragile and...”

The redhead began to spiral, her worries taking hold of her as she spilled her anxieties forth, causing her to gasp for breath at the end of her rant.

“Anukai, calm down. I may not specialize in pregnancy, but this kind of stress isn’t good for you or the baby.”

“But how can I calm down if I don’t _know for certain_ they’ll be safe?”

Vansa’s expression softened, her hand taking Anukai’s mechanical one.

“We’ll work on it together. Your arm... _that_ I can do.”

The redhead shifted uncomfortably as Vansa began to rattle off all the technical reasons why she was in full control, but now that she’d spoken the fear aloud, a discomfort had settled deep in her core, one she knew wouldn’t leave easily.

One that might not leave at all.

\------

Ara strolled around the market in Meridian’s city center, absentmindedly browsing the stalls. She handed over a few shards to a merchant in exchange for some dried mango that she began to eat dispassionately.

She hadn’t been able to get the morning’s events off her mind, an indisputable reminder that one day, months from now, her mirror image would hold a newborn that would look like it could have been hers, Ashana’s, Anukai’s interchangeably. She idly wondered if Ashana had experienced a similar morning, eventually resolving that she likely hadn’t. There was something between her and Anukai that the former Banuk and Ashana didn’t share just _quite_ as strongly.

Ara rubbed at the scar on her left arm. Maybe that _something_ was the night that had changed them both. She scratched at the buzzed side of her hair, unsure of where to go next but reasonably sure that home wasn’t the place. She felt unnerved. Unsettled. Or was that Anukai? When the connection was strong enough, sometimes she wasn’t certain who felt what, only that it was _felt_.

It was mid-afternoon when eventually she found herself nearing Vansa’s building, kicking her feet as she walked. They didn’t speak often, given their past, but still, Vansa seemed like the person Ara needed to see at that moment.

Ara knocked on the red door hesitantly before hearing a “Come in!”

The redhead entered cautiously, peering around the corner when she pulled the rest of her body in. She caught Vansa’s eyes as she stepped forward.

“Hey,” Ara said, offering a small wave.

“What do you want?” Vansa asked, her tone sharper than usual as she fiddled with some bit of machinery nearby.

“Can’t I just… chat?”

Vansa narrowed her eyes. “With me? Never.”

“Come on,” Ara begged. “I just… didn’t know who else to ask.”

The dark-haired woman looked up, noting the seriousness in the redhead’s face.

“Could we just… talk somewhere?” Ara asked, eyes darting for some semblance of privacy.

Vansa sighed. “Yeah, my office. Come on,” she offered, leading Ara down the hallway to a door she opened.

The two walked inside to find a room covered in books and scrolls and even more bits of wire and machinery. In the corner there some were Carja-style couches in deep reds and burgundies.

The dark-haired woman sat down, motioning for Ara to do the same.

“Fine. We’re _somewhere_ ,” Vansa said. “Now what is it?”

Ara bit her lip, the look causing Vansa to shudder as she realized she’d seen the exact same expression on Anukai’s face earlier in the day.

“Uh, do you think… I’d be good with… with kids?” Ara asked, looking up at the other woman.

Vansa’s mouth parted slightly, the color draining from her face. “Y-you too? No, no way… I just never… I never thought after that night in Reva…”

“Too?” Ara asked. “Oh… so she told you.”

Vansa nodded. “Anukai came by earlier today. But I mean… you’re not… are you?”

Her expression was suddenly much kinder than it had been earlier, concern deep in her brow.

“Fuck no,” Ara rebuked. “And... and _never_ …” The redhead paused, swallowing hard against the old, agonizing memory. “... _ever_ mention _that night_ in Reva to me, you understand?”

Vansa’s eyes glassed briefly before blinking the moment away, shaking her head in the affirmative.

“You know I can’t… that I _don’t_ talk about it,” Ara said, with an air of finality.

“Then why are you asking?”

“I just… I don’t want to fuck things up. For Anukai, you know? I want to be good at it. Whatever… I… whatever part I play.”

“Whatever part you play? She’s your _sister_ , Ara--”

“--It’s, we’ve… we’ve never said it like that.”

“Well _whatever you are_ ,” Vansa said, “you’re related to these kids. Or at least one of them, if nothing else. I mean technically… _genetically_ , you’re--”

“--the same. You think I haven’t thought about that? I _get it_. You could say I’ve been very _involved_ lately,” Ara interrupted, pausing before adding under her breath, “more involved than I want to be some days.”

Vansa leaned forward, hands clasped between her knees, an amused smile playing on her face.

“What’s that for?” Ara asked.

“Nothing just… good to see you devoted to something. Someone. Family looks good on you, Ara.”

The redhead blushed at the compliment. Was she really _devoted_ to these kids? To family?

“Look,” Vansa said, interrupting Ara’s thoughts, “we both know you’re stubborn enough that if you set your mind to it, you’ll be great. And you want this? To be good at this, right?”

Ara nodded genuinely. “Yeah… I--yeah.”

The dark-haired woman smiled, recalling years of Ara’s charms and perseverance.

“Have you ever _not_ been good at something you wanted?”

“You.”

Vansa smirked.

“Well, that’s true.”

\------

Ara knocked on the front door of the familiar apartment, a bag full of food from the market trailing in one hand.

The door cracked open after a moment, Ikrie answering with a smile.

“Hey Ara,” Ikrie said, leaning forward to hug the other woman. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” the redhead said, breaking from their embrace and shuffling nervously. She glanced again at the scar on her arm. “I just thought I was close and I wanted to check on you two, you know, with everything. I uh... I brought dinner.”

Ikrie looked down, her smile now much wider. “I knew I liked you. Come in, come in.”

Ara entered their home, and Ikrie quickly took the bag and placed it on the table, beginning to unpack its contents.

The redhead turned, only to find her mirror standing before her.

“Hey, Anukai. Heard you, uh… had a rough morning.”

Anukai sighed. “Ikrie tell you that?”

“No,” Ara said pointedly, staring Anukai right in the eye. “I had a _feeling_.”

“I’m sorry,” the braided redhead said softly. “I didn’t mean--”

Ara stepped forward, pulling Anukai into a hug.

“I _know_.”


	4. Bleeding Through

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

It was dark, but not quite as dark as the Cut at night, or even Meridian. Everything was wet, but it wasn’t raining. The heat laid like a blanket over everything, seeping through her clothes and to her skin.

Or perhaps it was the sweat doing the opposite.

Anukai tried to focus on the images before her, but all she could make out were the blurry impressions of lights against the backdrop of what must be dark buildings. There were so many people around her, it almost felt like Meridian during one of the Carja festivals.

It wasn’t Meridian, she could tell, but it was familiar.

She’d been here before.

Someone had, at least.

No, her too.

Suddenly, the image seemed to snap into perfect clarity, bringing with it a man in strange clothing, the design unlike most tunics or even the Carja silks she had begun to grow accustomed to, but instead appearing to be some kind of dark leather. The lack of sleeves made it easy to see the intricate array of tattoos that snaked their way from his shoulder to his wrist.

As Anukai blinked, his image swam before her, but the next blink brought him back into focus.

He was holding something toward her, but when she turned her attention to it, she couldn’t quite make out what it was, other than some kind of drawn pouch. The next thing she knew, she had handed over what appeared to be some kind of metal coins, swiping the pouch from the man’s hand.

“Hope you’re prepared.”

“I’ve got help.”

The words seemed to echo in Anukai’s ears, a faint recognition that it was her own voice running through the back of her mind before the world seemed to blur around her, returning to a mass of indistinct colors and sounds. She was aware of other people, other bodies pressing against her own, each bump and jostle making her feel as if she might vomit.

Finally, the lights and sounds fell away as her gaze focused on a dark set of stairs beside what appeared to be a small elevator, its walls made of a latticework of thin metal that easily allowed anyone to see inside it. The front doors slid aside and she stepped inside, her finger instinctually jabbing for a button on a panel to her left. As the elevator rose, she glanced down toward the pouch still held in her opposite hand, part of her wanting to open it and look inside, but her fingers refused to cooperate.

Moments later, she was standing before a door, a set of numbers loosely held in place at eye level. Something let out a short, electronic chime and the next thing she knew, she was inside the space beyond the door.

It was an apartment, but it had the same familiarity as the street outside.

A feeling of somewhere foreign.

A feeling of familiarity.

Someone had been here before.

Vague impressions of voices and the silhouette of a face passed before her, but none of them seemed to stick in her mind, or remain before her for long. The image of a small, grey kettle on a hot plate appeared before her for a moment before her hands were dumping the contents of the pouch into a waiting, copper cup nearby.

Immediately, a strong, earthy scent reached her and part of her began to feel a sense of panic seeping in, but it wasn’t enough to stop her hands as they gripped the cup, holding it shakily before her. A small amount of the liquid within spilled onto her hand and she heard her voice swear aloud, nearly dropping the cup until another pair of hands gripped hers, holding them steady.

Once again, a face appeared before hers, but this time she could make it out more clearly. Light brown skin, green eyes, long, curly hair pulled back under some kind of cloth bandana.

“You going to do this?”

Anukai tried to say no, to push the cup away from her, but her hands seemed to do the opposite, tipping the contents into her mouth and drinking it in several painful swallows.

The apartment seemed to blur around her, but the feeling that had begun to sink into her stomach was clearer than anything she had seen, heard, or felt so far.

It felt like her insides were twisting, squeezing in on themselves. She was aware of vomiting into some kind of bucket, but it never seemed to stop. Her organs wanted to escape from her mouth, but even as she clawed at her stomach, almost begging them to just do it, she only found the muscle tensed tighter and tighter.

At some point, tears began to stream down her face, running between her lips, only to be expelled with the next set of dry heaves.

The pain in her abdomen was stronger than ever, and she was vaguely aware of the sound of herself screaming in her ears, even as hands continued to stroke at her back reassuringly.

“Just get through this…”

She didn’t want to.

She had made this decision before.

Hadn’t she?

She had made both.

Once upon a time.

Someone had made each.

At different times.

Different people.

With the same voice.

Part of her wondered if this was truly what it felt like to die, but another told her she had experienced that before, and it had been nothing like this.

This was so much worse.

It wasn’t herself she needed to worry about.

“You said you didn’t want it.”

Anukai wanted to scream that that was wrong, that she did, that she hadn’t wanted _this_.

How could she have wanted this?

The world continued to blur and streak around her, the sensations of vomiting falling away, as did the gentle touch on her back. The feeling in her core, however, remained.

It was like part of her was dying, burning out of existence.

In that moment, she knew exactly what it was.

Anukai screamed.

Suddenly, hands gripped her shoulders much more firmly, shaking her until the vague and blurred images before her disappeared, replaced instead with a paler face framed by darker, straighter hair. The lips moved, but Anukai couldn’t hear what they were saying, her attention was still focused on her abdomen, her right hand pressed firmly against her stomach. She could still feel the slight curve to it that had grown more noticeable in the past several weeks, but something deep down still felt like her insides were twisting around themselves.

Something in the back of her mind kept screaming that part of her was dying… was dead.

“No… no, no, no…”

Her shoulders shook again, prompting her gaze to refocus on the face before her.

“No, no, no…”

Finally, as her voice began to reach a fever pitch in volume and intensity, a hand slipped over her mouth, the face before her leaning forward, although Anukai continued to try to twist her head away from the touch.

“Anukai! Please!”

The voice finally broke through, prompting her to fall still, the image of the face before her moving in and out of focus for several moments before blurring once again as the redhead felt sobs begin to shake her.

“What’s wrong?”

The redhead began to mutter softly, but her words were muffled by the hand over her mouth, still. Slowly, the fingers slid away, however, freeing her words.

“I lost it… it’s gone…”

“What?” Ikrie said, confusion creasing her face.

“I lost it…”

“Lost what?”

Anukai’s right hand rubbed at her stomach as she continued to repeat the same two phrases until Ikrie glanced down, her face going entirely pale as her eyes widened.

“Anukai, w-what do you mean?”

The redhead continued her mantra as the dark-haired woman above her scrambled off of the bed.

“Anukai, just… come on, get up,” Ikrie commanded, a tremor to her voice as she spoke. “We’ll go see the infirmary right now.”

The redhead continued to shake her head, sobs wracking at her chest as Ikrie stared down at her incredulously for a moment or two until she shook her head, scrambling around the bed to grab her Focus from the bedside table and slipping it beside her ear with trembling fingers. She quickly navigated through the menus until she found a name in the contacts and jabbed at it forcefully.

The sounds of an electronic chime rang in her ear for several long seconds as she glanced back at Anukai, finding her still repeating the same phrases, although her words were becoming nearly indecipherable as her sobs grew stronger. After several more long seconds and the chiming continued to sound, Ikrie swore, swiping away the name and bringing it to a stop. She frantically searched through the others in the list until she jabbed at another.

This time, the chiming only sounded for a second or two before a voice replaced.

“Ikrie? It’s late… or really early.”

“I need help, right now.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Anukai, she… we need to go to the infirmary. _Now_.”

“I’m on my way.”

The dark-haired woman closed the Focus interface with a tap to its side, scurrying back around the bed before coming to a stop beside Anukai, placing one hand on her right shoulder.

“Anukai, please… we need to go to the infirmary i-if… if you… if you think…”

The redhead continued to shake her head until Ikrie began to tug on her arm more insistently, drawing her gaze back to her.

“Come on,” the dark-haired woman pleaded, her voice cracking as she spoke.

Anukai stopped speaking finally, swallowing heavily before slowly turning to take a seated position on the edge of the bed, her right hand still held over her stomach. Ikrie quickly turned, striding over to their bureau before pulling a Banuk fur jacket from the various items within, nearly pulling several other articles of clothing to the floor as she did. The dark-haired woman quickly returned to her wife, swinging the jacket around behind her and attempting to get her to place her arms into the sleeves, but Anukai refused to oblige.

Ikrie suddenly heard a knocking from the front door of the apartment and settled on draping the jacket over the redhead’s shoulders before rushing through the darkened space until she threw open the front door.

“Where is she?” Vansa asked, stepping into the apartment as Ikrie turned to make her way back to the bedroom, leaving the front door open behind her.

The healer woman quickly followed the dark-haired Banuk into the room at the end of the hallway, moving around Anukai and crouching before her.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” she asked. “Something hurt?”

“I lost it…”

Vansa’s eyes drifted down to her right hand, noting its position, before she swallowed heavily.

“We don’t know that,” she said, rising to a standing position. “On your feet.”

The redhead remained seating, shaking her head, for a moment or two before Vansa sighed, slipping beside her for a moment to slide her arm around Anukai’s shoulders. Finding a grip under her opposite arm, she attempted to drag the redhead to her feet, but she could feel her weight tipping toward the opposite side as she offered no assistance.

A moment later, however, Ikrie appeared on her opposite side, taking a similar position and helping lift Anukai to her feet. Eventually, the redhead was standing, and the dark-haired woman glanced to Vansa, who nodded.

“I got her.”

Ikrie nodded before quickly releasing the redhead, hurrying over to their bureau, once again, and grabbing a jacket of her own, slipping it on before returning to the other two.

“Let’s go,” Vansa managed, shifting her grip on Anukai slightly before beginning to lead her out of the bedroom.

The redhead moved as if in a daze, her steps stumbling and faltering slightly as she kept her right hand held to her stomach, her left dangling almost helplessly at her side. When they exited the front door, Ikrie locked it behind them, hurrying to catch up with the other two a moment later.

“Call Aloy or Talanah,” Vansa said, glancing behind Anukai’s back to her. “Tell them to meet us.”

The dark-haired Banuk bit her lower lip for a moment, her hand paused halfway to tapping her Focus.

“Ikrie…”

She swallowed heavily before finally tapping the device, searching through the names on the list before her, again, before tapping one near the top. The streets were almost entirely empty as they continued on their way toward the palace, the only figures they passed typically the odd city guard patrol, most of whom simply cast curious glances toward them before noting the redhead in the center of the trio and glancing at each other.

Eventually, the party made it to the end of the bridge to the Palace, the royal guards on duty glancing between them in confusion before noting Anukai, as well.

“We need to get to the infirmary,” Vansa said.

The guards glanced to each other for a moment, and the healer woman almost felt as if they may not move aside, before they ultimately relented, allowing them to pass. Anukai’s footsteps were still uneven and unsteady as Vansa continued to guide her forward, her jaw clenching as she almost wished there were a way to get her to move faster.

At the end of the bridge, she noted a figure just exiting a door set into the wall at the edge of the stone dais ahead of them. When they spotted the approaching figures, they broke into a run, racing across the dais and onto the bridge before ultimately skidding to a stop before them.

“What’s wrong?” Aloy panted. “It’s the middle of the night.”

“She… she keeps saying… ‘I lost it’…” Ikrie managed.

The older redhead’s face drained of all color as she turned back to Anukai, finding her with her head hung forward, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

“No… oh no,” Aloy breathed, clearing her throat. “Come on, we’re getting her to Janna or—someone— _now_.”

With that, the older redhead helped Vansa in escorting Anukai onward, Aloy moving with enough strength and speed that she nearly began to drag the younger redhead with her. As they made their way down the twisting stairwells of the Palace, they were forced to slow for fear of tripping and falling, but they ultimately exited into a hallway with large, railed openings on their left and a series of heavy, wooden doors to their right.

Aloy glanced both ways up and down the space before cursing and turning to lead them to the right. When they had made their way almost halfway down the length of the hallway, a figure suddenly appeared from one of the doorways ahead of them, turning to look toward the sound of their hurried footsteps in confusion.

When they saw the younger redhead, in particular, the figure seemed to snap into motion, jogging toward them.

“What happened?” the healer, a woman with dark skin and short-cropped hair dressed in the standard white tunic, leggings, and apron, asked.

“She—she’s pregnant but she woke up saying—she think she—that the baby…” Ikrie stammered.

The healer quickly turned back to Anukai, scanning her over for a moment before gesturing for the group to follow her. They quickly made their way to one of the other doors ahead of them, the woman ahead of them throwing it open and glancing inside before gesturing for them to enter. As they led Anukai into the room, they found that it was empty, both beds inside it neatly-made and ready.

Aloy and Vansa gently deposited Anukai on the bed to the left, the healer woman noting that the younger redhead now also appeared to be shivering.

“I don’t see signs of blood,” the Palace healer said. “I’ll want to get a scan to make sure.”

After they had finally been able to lay Anukai down, the Palace healer brought over a small, handheld device, which she held before her, tapping a Focus beside her ear as she appeared to study it for several moments. Finally, she turned back to the younger redhead, leaning over her.

“Hey, I’m going to have to ask you to move your hand,” she said softly.

Anukai remained still, but Ikrie moved to her opposite side, gently taking her right arm by the elbow and pulling it back until she was able to hold the redhead’s hand in her own. The dark-haired woman threaded her fingers between Anukai’s, gripping her tightly as the Palace healer held the device over Anukai’s abdomen and the just noticeable curve visible against her sleep shirt.

The woman slowly moved the device back and forth for one of the longest minutes of any of the women’s lives until she finally let out a relieved sigh, pulling it back.

“I don’t see signs of miscarriage,” she said. “Readings show as expected for someone as far along as her.”

“So… she didn’t lose it?” Ikrie managed.

The Palace healer shook her head.

“I don’t believe so, no. She can stay here overnight, if you’re concerned.”

The dark-haired woman swallowed heavily, glancing to the other two who had helped bring Anukai from their apartment.

“Maybe for the best, kid,” Aloy sighed. “Just to be safe.”

Ikrie nodded, her lips pulling into a thin line as she turned back to Anukai, running her thumb over the back of her hand.

“I’ll make sure she’s checked in,” the Palace healer said, returning the device to a table against the far wall before excusing herself into the hallway, closing the door behind her.

In the silence that followed, Ikrie leaned down toward Anukai, using her free hand to gently run her fingers over the top of her hair.

“You hear that?” she whispered. “She’s fine. You didn’t lose her.”

The younger redhead closed her eyes tightly, nodding as Ikrie saw tears begin to leak from the corners of them.

“It’s okay…”

The dark-haired woman leaned over her wife, pressing a gentle, shaky kiss against her forehead. When she pulled back, Anukai turned her head to her side, but kept her eyes shut tightly. Ikrie saw someone moving on the opposite side of the bed, prompting her to glance over.

Aloy came to a stop by the head of the bed, a tired, but relieved expression on her face.

“Hey, kid,” she said, gently placing a hand on her shoulder.

Anukai seemed to freeze for a moment before rolling her head to face the older redhead, finally opening her eyes and staring at her for a moment or two.

“Quite the scare, there,” Aloy continued, her voice the softest Ikrie had ever heard it as the older redhead reached forward, wiping at the tears on Anukai’s cheeks with the backs of her fingers.

The younger redhead remained silent as sobs began to shake her chest, her lower lip quivering slightly. Aloy smiled softly, turning her hand to cup Anukai’s cheek.

“You two’ll be okay, though.”

The older redhead glanced toward Anukai’s faintly swollen stomach before turning back to her face, once again.

“You should try to get some rest.”

The younger redhead began to shake her head, prompting Ikrie to squeeze her hand, once again.

“I’ll be here with you,” she said. “Okay?”

Anukai still didn’t look convinced, but Ikrie didn’t give her a chance to say or do anything else as she began to climb onto the bed beside her. The redhead finally shifted to one side, the narrow bed nowhere near as spacious as their own, but it was quite clear that Ikrie was not going to settle for any distance between them, regardless. The dark-haired girl positioned herself so Anukai was able to rest her head against her chest, Ikrie’s fingers stroking through her fiery mane as the redhead slowly began to curl into her more and more.

The dark-haired Banuk glanced up from her wife to the older redhead behind her, finding Aloy just wiping at her own eyes with the back of her hand.

“Thank you,” Ikrie whispered.

Aloy nodded in response, prompting the dark-haired woman to glance toward Vansa by the door, as well. The healer woman stood with her arms folded over her chest, her back propped against the wall, looking incredibly tired, seemingly now that the adrenaline had worn off.

“Any time,” she said, before Ikrie had even spoken, a grin tugging at her lips.

The dark-haired woman smiled, nodding in response before a yawn escaped Vansa.

“I’ll talk to you both tomorrow,” she managed.

The rest bid her goodnight, the healer woman exiting the room just as the Palace healer returned.

“She’s all set. One of us will come by to check on her after sunrise,” she said, noting Ikrie in the bed with the younger redhead. “Will you both be staying?”

Her gaze drifted to Aloy at the bedside, prompting her and Ikrie to exchange glances.

“Do you need me to?”

The dark-haired Banuk paused for a moment before shaking her head.

“We’ll be fine, I think.”

Aloy nodded.

“I’m always a call away, again. I’ll probably be in my study all night.”

With that, Aloy gave Anukai’s shoulder one last squeeze before turning to exit, the Palace healer seeing her out, extinguishing the light in the room before softly closing the door behind her, leaving Anukai and Ikrie in near total darkness. The redhead shifted her position slightly, seemingly curling in more tightly against the dark-haired woman as a sound like a whimper escaped her.

“It’s okay… it’s okay…” Ikrie cooed, placing a soft kiss atop her head.

“It felt… so terrible,” the redhead muttered.

The dark-haired girl wrapped one arm around Anukai’s shoulders, gently rocking her in place as she felt the silent sobs threaten to wrack her wife’s body, once again.

“Like… like dying but…”

“It’s over, you’re fine, she’s fine, we’re all fine,” Ikrie whispered, rubbing at Anukai’s left upper arm slowly. “Let it go for tonight. Breathe slowly…”

Eventually, Ikrie felt the redhead slip back into sleep, and she sighed heavily, finally allowing the tears to leak from her eyes as she bowed her head, resting her forehead against the crown of Anukai’s head. The dark-haired Banuk remained awake for far longer than her wife, eventually removing her jacket to drape over them like a blanket before ultimately allowing herself to drift off, keeping Anukai’s head firmly placed against her chest, her presence making Ikrie painfully aware of her own heartbeat.

There would still be two more to care for, yet.

Still two.

Ara sat slumped low on her couch, eyes barely focused on the wall across from her as one hand desperately clung to a mug of some kind of cold tea concoction that one of the barkeeps at the speakeasy Talanah had first shown her when she had arrived in Meridian had recommended. She had experienced nights of consumption that left her with little to no memories, before, but this one in particular seemed to leave a lingering revenge that none of those other times had previously given.

“Fuck, stop getting old…” she mumbled, sipping at the bitter drink and grimacing at the flavor.

The redhead could remember the night starting at a small, back-street tavern with Bekan and several of his friends who she had met at least a few times before, but from only a few hours after the sun had set until she had woken up face down in nothing but the fabric undershorts beneath her leggings on her bed with the sun already burning brightly through her window, there was little in the way of memories.

Impressions, vague images, and sounds came back to her, but as she had tried to parse through them earlier, she had begun to question if they had truly been memories from the night before.

Another sip of the cold tea brought with it the nagging thought that clung to some of those images… that they were of a particular night in another large city. A shiver ran through her as her head lolled to her right, staring at the drink in her hand disdainfully.

“Work faster.”

Suddenly, the sound of knocking on her front door prompted her to nearly throw the mug across her apartment before she caught herself, swearing softly as some of the liquid inside spilled, regardless. With a sigh, she rubbed at her eyes tiredly, refusing to fully sit up.

“Who is it?”

“It’s me, Ara.”

The voice was immediately recognizable, prompting her to freeze in place for a moment before she lowered her hand, staring in confusion at the inside of her door.

“Anukai, if you can’t tell…”

Ara dragged herself to her feet, placing the mug on the counter of her kitchenette before glancing down at herself and tying the black, Carja silk top so that it no longer hung open loosely in the front. With a deep breath, she staggered to her front door, pulling it open and immediately squinting at the bright light from outside.

Eventually, the image of her near-mirror image materialized from the bright light, revealing the slight frown set into her features.

“How could I guess?”

“You come here to give me a lecture?” Ara shot back, prepared to close the door, once again, but Anukai quickly placed her hand on it, preventing her from doing so.

“No, but I need to talk to you.”

The hungover redhead sighed, gesturing dramatically for her to enter, prompting the other redhead to slip inside. As soon as Ara had pushed the door closed behind her, she turned around to find Anukai almost directly in her face.

“Last night, that was you, wasn’t it?”

Confusion creased Ara’s face as she gently raised her hands to push against Anukai’s shoulders, trying to put some space between them.

“I don’t remember a lot about last night, so… based on your tone, I hope not.”

“Those—those images—those feelings—those— _memories_.”

Ara blinked several times as the Banuk redhead let out a growl of frustration, spinning on her heel and pacing several steps away before turning back to her.

“I thought—I thought—part of me was— _dying_ …”

The hungover redhead squeezed her eyes shut, desperately trying to remember the night before, but as she did, the realization that those images and feelings she had noted with apprehension earlier suddenly came rushing back to her in horrifying detail.

They were memories, but not of last night.

“Shit…”

“So you get drunk and just, relive that over and over?” Anukai spat. “You _know_ what—what this thing is between us, Ara. How could you be so careless?”

“Careless?!”

Ara opened her eyes, her jaw clenching as the adrenaline that suddenly poured through her veins began to remove some of the grogginess the hangover had brought on thus far.

“You think I just—casually _want_ to remember that?”

“You clearly didn’t until I said it just now,” Anukai spat.

“It’s _my_ memory!” Ara shot back. “I’m sorry that I can’t control what I think of when I’m drunk every time.”

“But…” Anukai trailed off, letting out a growl of frustration and swinging a fist at the empty air beside her, finally whirling back toward the other redhead and staring her down. “So this is payback for you feeling sick before?”

“I wasn’t trying to show you any of that!” Ara shouted, taking an aggressive step forward even as the heaviness had refused to fully leave her limbs. “Quite frankly, I’d prefer you had never seen it.”

“Me, too!”

The two redheads maintained eye contact for several long moments, seemingly trying to outbid the other with how much fire they could infuse into their expressions, until finally, Ara closed her eyes, shaking her head.

“What do you want me to say, Anukai?”

A moment or two of silence passed before the sound of the other redhead inhaling slowly came from before her.

“I… I don’t know…”

When Ara finally opened her eyes to look back up at her, she found Anukai pacing slowly before her, one hand idly trailing over the back of a chair beside her.

“I… I think I came here wanting… wanting you to apologize… but…”

Silence fell over them for several long moments before the long-haired redhead paused, taking a deep breath and whirling to face her near-mirror image, again.

“You never… never told me about… well, your past, really, but…”

“Not something I like to talk about.”

Anukai carefully took a step forward, Ara eying her warily in case she needed to duck a swing at her head.

“It… it felt so…”

The shorter-haired redhead noted how Anukai’s right hand had risen to idly rub at her stomach and her lips pulled into a thin line.

“I told you it would have been a rough night.”

The Banuk let out a shaky sigh as she hung her head.

“I… I had a feeling about… why you knew, but…”

Several long moments of silence passed before the Anukai suddenly stepped forward quickly, prompting Ara to recoil in defense, tensing. Although the other redhead’s arms raised, she noted that neither of her hands were curled into fists, and confusion creased her face. Slowly, Anukai wrapped her in a stiff embrace, leaving Ara’s eyes wide for several moments before she tentatively returned it. Several long seconds passed before the shorter-haired redhead began to feel the first telltale tremors pass through the former Banuk’s torso and she carefully slid from the embrace, bracing her hands on her shoulders, instead.

“How much… how much did you… feel?”

Anukai hung her head, refusing to reveal any tears to the other redhead.

“All of it.”

Ara’s jaw clenched as she squeezed her shoulders gently.

“I’m—”

“I woke up,” Anukai interrupted, “and… I thought… _I_ had… that it was…”

Confusion creased Ara’s face for several moments before her eyes suddenly widened and all of the color drained from her face.

“No, Anukai… I… you didn’t…”

“She’s fine,” the redhead replied, her tone shaking, “but I just… for a while I… I was so convinced… that… that it was… that _I_ …”

Ara quickly slid forward wrapping the other woman in a tight embrace as she swore repeatedly under her breath. To her slight surprise, Anukai returned the gesture, wrapping her arms tightly around the other redhead.

“I’m sorry,” Ara whispered beside her ear, “I’m so, so sorry…”

Slowly, they made their way over to Ara’s couch, the shorter-haired redhead shoving aside the cast aside clothing and pillows so that both of them could sit before gesturing for Anukai to join her. As the former Banuk sank onto the couch, she hung her head, once again, her hands clasping tightly between her knees.

“I… I almost never… remember that night… like that,” Ara said softly. “I mean… who’d want to, right?”

Anukai let out a short, wet laugh, which only prompted the other redhead to frown.

“Listen, I… I know that whatever this thing is between us… we don’t know how to control it—if we can control it, even—and… and I wish I knew how to control it more, so that… especially now that doesn’t…”

“Don’t drink.”

Confusion creased Ara’s face as Anukai raised her head finally, looking over at her to reveal the wet trails on her cheeks that the shorter-haired redhead couldn’t quite tell if they were actively fresh or not.

“Between now and… and when she’s born, at least,” Anukai continued.

“O-oh… I mean… we don’t know—”

“Ara, _please_.”

The former Banuk redhead suddenly reached forward, grasping one of Ara’s hands with her own in a surprisingly tight grip.

“For both of us… but… also, I… I can’t live through that again.”

The shorter-haired redhead stared back at her for several long moments before swallowing heavily and nodding, her eyes remaining locked on their mirror image across from her.

“Okay.”

Anukai offered a small, sad smile, squeezing her hand for a moment before beginning to release it.

“I know that sounds selfish, but… you also said you don’t want to relive it…”

“No, I don’t,” Ara sighed, “and you’re right. It’s… probably easier when I’m not… as drunk as I was…”

Anukai raised her eyebrows.

“Or at all.”

Ara sighed heavily, nodding as her shoulders deflated.

“Or at all…”

Anukai leaned forward slightly, prompting the other redhead to glance up at her, again.

“If… if you need help with it…”

“I’ve come to my own personal agreement about that night long ago,” Ara interjected, her jaw clenching as Anukai recoiled slightly.

“I understand… but I… I actually meant… the other thing.”

The shorter-haired redhead let out a soft “oh”, nodding as she shifted uncomfortably.

“Right, sorry.”

“No need to be sorry.”

“Hey, I use that word so little, you should cherish when I do,” Ara shot back, smirking.

Anukai grinned, as well, shaking her head before letting out a heavy sigh.

“Sure, but… you don’t have to be, now.”

Ara’s smirk turned into a more awkward, sheepish grin as she nodded, clasping her hands between her knees as she stared down at them for a few moments. Finally, she glanced over toward Anukai, her eyes drawn particularly to her stomach.

“So she’s all good?”

The long-haired redhead followed her gaze before nodding, sitting up a little straighter to run her right hand over her stomach, the motion pinning her silk top to it and revealing the slight bulge more than before.

“Healers say so.”

“Look at you, finally starting to show,” Ara teased.

Anukai’s face quickly turned red as she fanned her top, trying to make it hang more loosely and obscuring her figure, once again. The shorter-haired redhead laughed as she nudged the former Banuk’s knee with her own.

“Don’t have to look so embarrassed. It happens with this sort of thing, you know.”

“I know but… if you can see… others can and… they can talk… and stare.”

“So?” Ara shot back. “Nothing unusual about a pregnant woman.”

“No, but… it’s _me_ ,” Anukai sighed. “They’ll be looking at _me_ and… I’ve never…”

The shorter-haired redhead let out an “ah” in understanding as she nodded.

“I get it.”

“You’re one to talk. You’re the one with the super noticeable hairstyle.”

“Hate to break it to you, but you, me, Aloy, and Ashana are the only ones I’ve seen around here with red hair,” Ara said. “Think we stand out, regardless.”

Anukai squirmed uncomfortably, prompting the other redhead to sigh, reaching across to place one hand over hers, this time.

“It’ll be okay.”

The former Banuk seemed to sink into her seat slightly more as she sighed, nodding.

“We’ll be okay.”


	5. Phantom Pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By imagine0314

_It hurts and she doesn’t know why._

Aloy rubs at her left arm just above the elbow, a deep, dull ache radiating down the limb. It’s been like this for days, and it’s only getting worse, causing her to wince with each movement.

“You okay?” Talanah asks, concern lacing her voice. “What did you do, anyway?”

“Not sure,” Aloy says ruefully, rubbing at the same spot again. “Must have pulled something. Maybe an old injury acting up.”

“ _Aloy Sobeck_ ,” Talanah replies, using her full name for emphasis, “I know every scar on your body and _that’s_ not one of them.”

“What do you want me to say?” the redhead asks rhetorically, dropping her right hand away from the offending limb. “I’m getting old. It happens.”

“Not on my watch,” the Carja retorts, turning out the light in their room, the only illumination coming from the nearly-full moon outside the window. 

Aloy hums an amused non-answer before swinging her legs up and onto the bed, slipping into Talanah’s familiar embrace, fitting together in comforting contours, the same way they have for decades now. 

The Carja slips an arm around the redhead’s waist, her chest pressed into Aloy’s back, before she kisses the pale, freckled expanse of her shoulder. 

Before Aloy can close her eyes she hears Talanah’s voice, low and soft. 

“You think they’re doing okay?” 

“Anukai and Ikrie?”

“Mhm. I worry about them. One’s a lot. Two’s… well, by the Sun, we never even _considered_ two. Even when we thought we might… well, you know. And at the same time?”

“I know. I worry too. I want to be there for them both, _especially_ Anukai...because, well--”

“You don’t have to explain. I get it. I kind of feel the same about Ikrie.”

Aloy nods silently, feeling the warmth of her wife’s skin against her back. “I’m trying to help as much as I can but I don’t want to overstep. Anukai hasn’t--”

“--She hasn’t really said the words yet. You know it’s hard for her. She’ll come around.”

“You think?” Aloy asks, a nervous swallow betraying her. 

There’s a pain there, and for a moment, she wonders if it’s her arm again, only to realize this time it sits heavy and solid beneath her ribs. This wound is far older than the throb in her arm, and she wonders if it will ever truly go away.

“I _know_ ,” Talanah says quietly but firmly. 

The pair stay silent as darkness presses harder and harder into the room and Aloy leans her weight into Talanah’s embrace. She grimaces against the ache in her arm. Against the ache in her chest.

_It hurts and she doesn’t know why_.

\------

She’s standing.

She can tell the figure in front of her has asked a question she doesn’t know and waits for an answer she can’t give. What was it Talanah just asked her? 

“Do you want to feel?”

No, _not_ Talanah. Ikrie.

There’s a tug in her left arm, and before she can say no, Ikrie’s reaching for her. The sensation doesn’t feel quite right. It’s muted, like muffled sound. There’s something else. Something deep rooted and unsettling about it, the way the skin--

No, _not_ skin. Metal. Metallic plating that makes her shiver with an animal-like unease. She knows there’s some place, some exact delineation between the part that is still firmly _her_ and the part that is _other_. Some days, she can almost feel where her remaining nerves are woven into the metal, raw flesh and blood and regret. 

Ikrie places the redhead’s prosthetic palm on the round of her belly and before she can even begin to register any sensation other than the _fear she might hurt her_ , Aloy--no, _Anukai_ \--is flinching away, jerking her arm back. 

The dark-haired Banuk frowns deeply, a look of hurt permeating her features. 

“You… _don’t_ want to?”

“No, it’s not--” she feels herself say, stumbling for an apology.

“He’s _ours_ , Anukai, not just mine. I want you to be part of this.”

“I know, I just--” the redhead sighs, offering her right hand instead of her left.

There’s a dread creeping into her core, right where her own child resides.

_It hurts and she doesn’t know why_.

\------

The mirror reflects younger features than she’s used to. No longer is her hair an even mix of red and silver, but instead it remains bright and fiery. Her beads are missing, her mane instead tamed into a singular braid. So much of this body is familiar, _lived in_ , until her identical green-gold eyes catch a glimpse of her swollen middle beneath her blue tunic. 

It comes as a surprise, though she knows it shouldn’t. She _wanted_ this, after all, and for a moment, she’s unsure which of them she means. Anukai? Aloy? Elisabet? She pauses, wondering idly if there’s a difference right now in this place. 

Her eyes go wide.

There’s some feeling, something deep and unsettling and comforting all at once. 

She’s never felt this before. She _has_ felt this before.

The redhead reaches, first with her right hand, before she lets it drop. No. What was it Ikrie was always saying? That it was part of her? She’d lived with the arm for ten years already. It’s safe. She has control. 

Why is this so hard?

She raises her left hand, smooth and gray and sleek and places it gingerly on the side of her belly. She freezes, her heart in her throat as she does so, before she feels the muted little thumps against her palm.

Her daughter.

A small, tentative smile spreads across her face as she rubs gently, considering for a moment that Ikrie was right all along. She shouldn’t have been afraid to touch either of them. Shouldn’t have been afraid to reach eagerly for their children’s movements.

Until she feels it. 

Some unnamed ache in the metal vibrates down the appendage and suddenly the arm moves without her consent, the crushing force of it driving into her middle violently.

“No!” she yells, but it’s not enough, and she watches in the mirror before her, helpless, as dark blood seeps from where metallic fingers have penetrated her skin. 

She feels something soft and fragile within crush and burst.

She’s screaming and somehow she’s certain it’s all three of them in horrifying unison.

_It hurts and she doesn’t know why_.

\------

Aloy’s eyes open wide, and before she knows what’s happening, she’s sitting upright, panting and with a cold sweat dripping down her chest. It’s just barely dawn, the sunlight through the window weak and dusty pink.

She frantically pats at her midsection, searching for something she knows has never been there, but still, the knowledge that _her--their--no, Anukai’s_ child is nowhere to be found still makes her feel instantly nauseous with dread. Somehow she _knows_ Anukai just woke from the same nightmare and she can’t even begin to imagine how much worse and intimate it feels for the younger redhead.

“Aloy?” 

Talanah’s voice is raspy with sleep but she’s quickly up and alert with concern. Aloy sits at the edge of their bed, hunched over herself and taking deep breaths. Talanah knows this. She’s seen it enough in their thirty-odd years together. 

“I’ve got you,” she promises, wrapping her arms around the redhead. “What did you see?”

“I need to go see Anukai today,” Aloy says, not offering further explanation; it’s too painful to put into words.

Talanah nods into her shoulders, placing a gentle kiss there. 

“Whatever you need. I can take Ikrie out for a while. Give you two some time to talk alone.”

The redhead hums something in the affirmative before hissing and rubbing again at her left arm, the pain so much worse than before she fell asleep.

_It hurts and she doesn’t know why_.

\------

“Hey kid, got a minute?” Aloy asks, looking over her shoulder and watching as Talanah and Ikrie walk out the door, laughing at something the older woman said.

Anukai’s face goes pale and Aloy _knows_. 

“S-sure. Can I get you something…?” 

“You sit. I’ll make some tea. You’ve got enough going on.” Aloy says, already up and moving in the younger redhead’s kitchen.

“You’d know,” Anukai says, remaining on the couch, a slight air of sarcasm coloring her voice. 

She nervously smooths her hands over her tunic, notably _not_ wearing the same blue one from their shared experience the night before. Her right hand comes to rest on the increasingly prominent swell beneath her clothing, her left laying flat at her side.

“I would,” Aloy replies softly, taking note of the way Anukai intentionally refuses to bring her left arm anywhere near her middle. 

She begins to boil water and look for cups, steadying herself for the conversation to come.

“Guessing you didn’t sleep well last night,” Anukai says stiffly, recalling the absolute terror and panic she’d woken with that morning and how long it had taken Ikrie to convince her she wouldn’t be the death of their children.

Aloy nods, pouring the water over bags of tea leaves. 

“You could say that.”

The older redhead brings over two steaming cups, setting them on a nearby table in front of Anukai and herself. She takes a sip, letting the hot liquid match the heat in her chest. 

“How are you?” Aloy asks. “Really.”

“Fine,” Anukai says quietly. “I’m--I’m fine, _she’s_ fine,” she insists, looking down where her hand rests. 

“Anukai…” Aloy begins, an uncharacteristic softness filling her eyes, “what I saw--what I _felt_ last night, that didn’t seem ‘fine’.” 

The older redhead rubs at her left arm again, trying to soothe the ache and Anukai watches, jaw tensing with a similar phantom pain. It hasn’t bothered her like this for years, but the longer she seems to linger on the sensation, the worse it gets.

_It hurts and she doesn’t know why_.

Anukai turns her head away, unable to meet Aloy’s gaze. 

“I’m here, you know. Whatever it means, whatever you _want_ it to mean. I just--” Aloy pauses tucking back a stray strand of silver before swallowing thickly to prevent her voice from cracking. “I didn’t get this chance, Anukai. And I want you to… to be able to focus on the good parts. Maybe even let yourself enjoy it.” 

She takes another sip of her tea, letting her words hang in the air and realizing Anukai hasn’t even touched hers.

When the younger redhead turns to face her, there’s red rimming her eyes. 

“I’m scared,” Anukai says, her voice shaking. “I don’t want to hurt Ikrie or our kids and the more I _feel_ her, the more _real_ she becomes, I--”

“You’re not going to.”

“But how can you say that?” Anukai rebuffs, almost angry. “You’ve seen me break things with this arm, you’ve seen me crush metal and lift things I shouldn’t be able to lift. You don’t know what I could do if I lost control--”

“I know exactly what you could do. We-we both saw… I felt...”

“Then you know why I can’t let myself touch Ikrie or our kids. Not with that… _thing_. I can’t take that chance, Aloy.”

“It’s not a _thing_ , Anukai. It’s _you_.”

The younger redhead huffs. 

“You sound like Ikrie.”

“Maybe she has a point. Have you ever hurt her? Have you ever hurt any of us since you got that arm?”

Anukai swallows and grabs for her cup of tea with her left hand, her right staying firmly on the side of her belly. “It’s not a matter of if I have. It’s if I _could_. Every generation of this damn family or whatever we want to call it has been hurt and _mangled_. I’m not doing that to anyone else.”

The younger redhead’s eyes are distant and cold. She takes a shuddering breath before pressing her lips thin. 

“You… you don’t know _everything_ I’ve done.”

Aloy raises an eyebrow, face contorting in confusion. 

“What are you talking about, kid?”

“You… weren’t there. In the prison at the Port all those years ago. I’ve… I’ve felt it happen, Aloy. Felt… bones giving way, felt what it was like to crush the life out of someone.”

The older redhead falters, setting her tea down before gently grabbing for Anukai’s flesh and bone wrist. 

“Anukai, no. No. I-I’ve...I’ve done--you know what I’ve done.”

“With your bare fucking _hands_?” Anukai counters, chest beginning to heave. 

She tries to choke back the memory, but she can still feel the soft yield of the guard’s flesh, breaking like overripe fruit. She can still feel the snap of bone like dry wood.

Aloy’s thumb gently rubs a repeating pattern against the younger woman’s skin, trying to imbue her with a sense of reassurance.

“You did what you had to… to protect yourself, to protect Ikrie,” Aloy insists, swallowing hard. “And now you’re doing whatever you can to protect _her_ , but you also need to know you can hold her, _touch_ her. Those things will also _protect_ her and mean just as much to her in the end. Probably more. I know it did for me.”

The corner of the older redhead’s mouth ticks up just a bit, recalling the moment when she’d finally made herself vulnerable to Talanah, letting the Carja’s affections come easily and without fear--when she first realized touch could soothe rather than make her suffer. It had changed her, deeply. 

Anukai shakes her head, unwilling to meet Aloy’s gaze. 

“I told you, I won’t risk hurting them,” she insists, her voice nearly a hiss.

“And you think it won’t hurt them when their mom refuses to give them a hug? When she’s always keeping her distance?”

Anukai grits her teeth, a stray hot tear trickling down her cheek. 

“This thing is _death_ , Aloy. Every time I look at it, I remember what it was like to bleed out in Ikrie’s arms. I remember that there’s some part of me _missing_ and that whatever replaced it _isn’t human_. I just… I don’t want our kids to know that feeling. I don’t want them to feel metal. I want them to feel _me_.”

Aloy leans forward, brow furrowed. She knows what it’s like to have part of herself irreparably damaged, to think of it and think of her death in an instant. She watches as Anukai’s lip quivers before the younger redhead winces.

“Hey kid, you okay?” Aloy asks, worry infusing every word.

To her surprise, Anukai laughs roughly. 

“I think we’ve got another huntress on our hands,” she says, rubbing at her side. 

“Here,” she says, reaching for one of Aloy’s hands and placing it over the exact spot.

Aloy smiles wide despite herself, not quite certain whether it’s her or Elisabet who’s unable to contain the leap in their chest at the feeling of movement beneath her palm. Finally, a Sobeck to break the cycle. New and innocent, not some ancient woman remade endlessly, haunting new body after body.

“Do you trust me?” Aloy asks softly, testing the waters.

Anukai pauses, nerves causing her to shake when she realizes what the older redhead is asking. After everything, there’s only one answer. 

“Yes.”

“Give me your hand, Anukai.”

Aloy reaches for Anukai’s gray palm, the metallic fingers curling gently around her own. 

“I--I can’t--”

“You can, Anukai. Trust me. Go slow.”

The older redhead gently guides the metallic appendage forward and she can feel the shake in the rest of the younger woman’s body as she does so, though the metal arm remains eerily still. Aloy pulls Anukai’s palm toward the one still resting on her middle, replacing her hand with Anukai’s own.

“It’s okay,” Aloy says quietly, and presses Anukai’s palm flat over the same spot she’d just occupied. “This your first time doing this?”

Anukai nods, biting her lip as she does so, bouncing her leg nervously.

“You feel that?”

Anukai hesitates and after a few seconds, it’s there. Muted and more distant than her right hand, but unmistakable. Before she can stop it her shoulders are shaking, sobbing in equal parts relief and awe. 

Aloy stills her hand on top of Anukai’s, keeping it firmly in place. 

“We’ll work on it, kid.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

\------

Aloy walks home, the sun dipping low and her fingers twined with Talanah’s. 

“Everything go okay?”

“I think so.”

The Carja gives her a soft smile, not prying further. 

“Your arm feeling better? Doesn’t seem to be bothering you as much.”

Aloy flexes the limb, realizing the ache has receded considerably, though it’s not completely gone. There’s some small, barely noticeable pain that resides. Subtle enough to ignore, she doesn’t bother mentioning it to Talanah. 

Maybe it will go away. Maybe some part of it will always remain. Either way, this she can do. This, she can bear for Anukai. 

_It hurts and she knows why_.


	6. Connection

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> original draft by imagine0314, revised/edited by NorthernGhost

It’s dark and warm and everything is soft and muted.

There is nothing to see, nothing to be afraid of.

Indistinguishable sounds filter through, as if underwater, two different tones that bear the cadence of conversation but without words to follow.

Despite having no idea of when or where, the distinct feeling of being  _ home _ in her own body pervades.

Centered and grounded.

She can’t remember the last time she felt this  _ content. _

Anukai found herself rising from sleep, her eyes slowly blinking open as she lay on her side, Ikrie’s back pressed against hers, the two as close as they could be while accommodating their changing shapes. She could tell it was early, but the sun was already bright and warm through the nearby window as she stared blearily at it for several long moments, her mind hyper-focused on the sensation of Ikrie’s breathing against her back, still slow and rhythmic. With a sigh, the redhead finally forced herself to pull away from the sensation, slowly pushing herself upright, the thought that it was getting harder to do crossing her mind more and more each day. 

With a quiet groan, she swung her legs over the edge of the bed, rolling her neck stiffly for a moment before forcing herself to stand. As she twisted and stretched, she could feel her spine cracking almost instantly; it ached in the dull way it had for the last month, but today she found herself surprisingly unbothered.

She couldn’t allow the soreness to sour her mood.

With a glance back at the dark-haired woman, soundly sleeping amidst the sheets she had recently vacated, she proceeded to their bureau on the far wall, changing into a light, loose tunic and pants that had become her new daily normal, now that none of her usual attire fit. Before turning away, she glanced at her image in the full-size mirror propped against the wall beside it, the reflection in it seemingly only familiar from the neck up. She had watched the rest change slowly, but part of her still found herself surprised to find the lack of form fitting tunics and the pronounced roundness at her middle.

Despite the initial feeling that prickled at the back of her mind, it quickly passed as a small smile tugged at her lips, her right hand absentmindedly running over her abdomen.

The feeling is warm and safe.

There’s a pulse she can’t distinguish, but it’s comforting, just like Ikrie’s has felt to her.

The feeling of home settles strongly, again.

Finally turning away from the mirror, she cast one last glance at her sleeping wife, Ikrie’s chest rising and falling slowly as her face remained partially buried in the pillow beneath her. The redhead’s smile grew broader as she carefully slipped out of the bedroom, closing the door gently behind her and padding down the hallway toward the living space and kitchen. The main area of the apartment was already well-lit with the same brightness and warmth as their bedroom, and as Anukai entered, she found a lightness settling into her actions that seemed to mimic it. Her steps felt lighter as she made her way to the pantry and gathered items from it, noting how much more well-stocked it was than she had ever remembered it being in the first years they had lived in the apartment.

“Makes it easier when we don’t have to buy any of it,” Anukai muttered, smirking.

Depositing her supplies on the counter nearby, she began the work of preparing breakfast at their small, electric stove.

Something half-forgotten hung in the back of her mind as she found herself humming while she worked, the tune somehow comforting and familiar even if she couldn’t place where it had come from originally.

It settles deep in her, like the pulse, like the warmth.

Vibrating her being.

It’s like the roll of distant thunder, or the sound of a soft voice in the middle of the night, one ear pressed against the speaker’s chest.

For several long minutes, she found herself lost in the monotony of preparing one of the few breakfast dishes she knew by heart until an embrace from behind shook her from her thoughts, her eyes glancing down to find a pair of hands clasping before her, coming to rest atop her middle.

“Someone’s in a good mood,” Ikrie muttered beside her ear, placing a kiss against Anukai’s temple a moment later.

The redhead hummed a soft response before glancing toward her, noting that the dark-haired Banuk had simply pulled a Carja silk robe over her sleep clothes, it seemed.

“Did I wake you?”

“No, pretty sure  _ he _ did,” Ikrie laughed dryly, glancing down at her middle with a faintly accusatory expression before lifting her gaze to the redhead’s, once again. “Why?”

“Wanted to surprise you,” Anukai shrugged. “Thought I’d bring you something before you could get out of bed.”

Ikrie smiled softly as the redhead returned it with a grin, quickly turning her gaze to her middle, as well.

“So much for that,  _ Kal, _ ” she laughed.

Ikrie scoffed as she absentmindedly rubbed at her round abdomen with one hand.

“Kal, huh?”

“I think it sounds good,” the redhead shot back, shrugging as she glanced back up at her.

“I give our son a traditional Banuk name and you shorten it to  _ that _ ,” Ikrie sighed, raising an eyebrow in faux disdain as she released Anukai and moved to take a seat at the small table nearby.

The redhead hesitated for a moment before turning back to her work on the stove, biting her lower lip as she stirred once or twice more with the wooden spoon in her hand. Finally, she pulled the cast iron pan from the heat, carefully distributing the mixture of eggs and potatoes between two plates before turning the hot surface off. Depositing the pan in the small wash basin nearby, she turned to grab the plates, one in each hand, and carefully made her way toward the nearby table, setting one in front of Ikrie.

“Do you hate it?” she asked softly, sliding a fork across the table to her wife before setting her own plate and sinking into the chair opposite the dark-haired woman.

Ikrie paused with her utensil still in her mouth, glancing up at her for a moment before swallowing her second bite, already.

“No, it’s great, as always.”

“No, I—not that,” Anukai sighed, drawing a raised eyebrow from her wife. “Kal. I can stop.”

Ikrie let out a soft “oh” as she lowered her fork, resting it against the edge of her plate as she stared back at the redhead with a thoughtful expression.

“Well, you  _ did _ make me breakfast…”

“So that’s what it takes to convince you?” Anukai shot back, rolling her eyes.

Ikrie stared back at her, eyes half-closed in thought for a few moments, as the redhead simply raised her eyebrows.

“Let me pretend to hate it, for the sake of tradition,” the dark-haired former Banuk finally replied, taking yet another bite or two of her breakfast before staring vacantly into the air to the right of the redhead. “It’s  _ kind _ of cute, the more I think about it.”

The redhead did her best to hide her satisfaction behind a mouthful of food, but she couldn’t hide the blush that spread across her cheeks as her wife glanced toward her with a smirk.

“So, what did I do to deserve this?” Ikrie asked, waving her fork over the plate of half-finished food before her. “Especially if you were going to bring it to me in bed. I sense it wasn’t only to slip this nickname by me.”

Anukai paused as she was about to scoop more food from her plate, shifting uncomfortably.

Honestly, she wasn’t sure what had inspired her actions, though as she glanced up at her mate across from her, she found that she couldn’t help but feel enamored with every move Ikrie made, the dark-haired woman taking another bite of her food and idly twirling her fork in the air before her as she waited for a response, her eyes shining with amusement and expectation.

Suddenly, she feels it again, the same contentment. The same intense feeling that she’s right where she should be.

The redhead has loved Ikrie for most of their lives, she admits, but something about today feels  _ different _ .

A slight shiver racks her, prompting Ikrie’s expression to morph into concern, her eyebrows raising.

“Can’t I just… I mean, Kal’s due in two months—”

“Don’t I know it.”

“—and I thought... I don’t know, that I’d do something nice.”

Ikrie remained silent for a moment or two, prompting the redhead to look back down at her plate, the warmth returning to her face as the blush across her cheekbones made another appearance.

“You always deserve it.”

The sound of a fork clinking against the plate across from her sounded before one of Ikrie’s hands appeared before her, gently taking Anukai’s free hand.

“Well,” the former Banuk said, running her thumb gently over the back of it as the redhead lifted her gaze to lock eyes with her, finding a soft smile settling on her lips, “I’m not complaining.”

\------

Ara fell into her seat beside Anukai, the two entering the second half of an hour of joking and trading stories. By the sheer number of them the other redhead had toted in the past few months, the former Banuk had begun to wonder how many of them were actually true. Part of her wondered if perhaps she could embellish some of her own to keep up, but the rest of her knew that it would be nowhere near as convincing. Ikrie could see through her stony and reserved demeanor, but Ara could see through everything else.

“So, where was I, exactly?” Ara sighed, blowing at the mug of steaming tea in her hand before holding it to her side casually.

“Something about a singer in a dark pub.”

“Ah, right, Mijin…”

The long-haired redhead entertained her with the appearance of attention as she sipped at her own drink, the tea having long since faded to a lukewarm temperature, while her thoughts drifted elsewhere. Anukai had long since noted that she’d been coming over more and more often lately, although she found the visits more comforting than imposing. The other redhead seemed to have taken it upon herself to help them both as much as she could, having often brought by necessities to spare them a trip, or simply providing some help around the apartment. 

If she had thought their pantry was full that morning, it had been nothing compared to its supplies, now.

Anukai had her suspicions as to why this change in behavior had occurred, but she had never admitted it to anyone else. It was easier to let the thought hang at the back of her mind, where she could ignore it.

Safe in her own head, away from others.

The short-haired redhead finally fell quiet, sipping at the cup of tea she had poured for herself, Anukai catching the briefest glimpse of a facial expression that told her she truly craved a harder drink, especially as the sun had set, although she hadn’t seen her touch a drop in months. To her knowledge, Ara hadn’t dared to let herself get near her old vices in the last three months, not since Anukai begged her to do so.

Another thing they both  _ knew, _ but never said.

“How’re you feeling?” Ara asked, drawing the former Banuk redhead from her thoughts as she lowered her mug of hot tea until her wrist braced against her knee, steam continuing to rise from it.

For the first time in their conversation that day, Anukai noted the change from the grin Ara had worn to a look of genuine concern.

“Good... really—really good, actually,” the long-haired redhead replied slowly, a slight grin of her own cracking her face as her eyes glazed in thought for a moment. “Woke up feeling that way, I guess.”

“And here I thought struggling in the morning was genetic,” Ara sighed, shaking her head.

To her surprise, Anukai found herself fully smirking, not able to bring herself to maintain her frequent deadpan. Ara had also seemingly been working on that with her, as well. She caught the similar expression on the other redhead’s face, in response, although she noted in particular that Ara’s eyes didn’t carry the same mischievous spark that usually accompanied it, but something warmer. Anukai took a sip of her tea before inhaling deeply, working her fingers around the outside of the ceramic mug.

“By the way,” she said slowly, still staring down into her drink, “I just... I wanted to say thank you—for everything these last few months.”

A few moments of silence passed before she glanced up to meet Ara’s eyes, once again.

“You know you don’t have to do all of this, right?”

The other redhead blushed, the crimson along her cheekbones an uncommon sight that she also tried to hide with a sip of her tea, to no avail.

“I  _ know _ I don’t  _ have _ to,” she said quickly, raising her eyebrows over her mug at the other redhead. “Maybe I  _ want _ to, though.”

Anukai continued to grin, nodding slightly as Ara moved to take another sip of her drink, only to pause and sigh, turning to set her tea down on the low table before them, instead. The former Banuk redhead watched her in curiosity as she slid closer on the couch. As she did, one hand reached toward her, and she slowly unwrapped her right hand from her mug, holding it toward the other redhead as she took hold of it. Anukai found herself surprised that she didn’t mind, and even more so that the two of them fit each other’s grip exactly.

She’s aware of a flood of feeling surging in her chest, though she’s not exactly sure why or where it came from.

It’s there again, that contentment, that feeling of deep familiarity.

Of  _ home _ .

“Anukai,” Ara began, her tone soft but with enough strength that Anukai’s eyes immediately lifted to meet hers, “I’m never going to do…  _ that _ .”

She nodded toward the Banuk’s prominent middle.

“I made that choice a long time ago, after...” Ara trailed off, swallowing heavily as the former Banuk redhead gently squeezed her hand, prompting her to take a deep breath and continue, “and I’m okay with it. Really. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to be good at  _ this _ and be here and...”

“Ara—”

“You and Ikrie and the—the kids... it feels like—family. I never had that growing up—not really—but now that this happened and I have a chance… I’m not making the mistake of letting it go… if you’ll let me.”

Anukai remained silent, but nodded slightly, a warm feeling spreading across her face with her smile as she squeezed Ara’s hand again. A moment later, she found herself slowly pulling it closer and placing it to her swollen middle. A jolt seemed to pass through both of them as the other redhead froze for a moment. She quickly seemed to recover, however breaking out into a grin as her shoulders visibly relaxed.

She feels the same rush as before. It’s murky and indecipherable, so much so that she can barely begin to sort out exactly  _ what _ the feeling is, too muddy to be named. 

But still, the same warm feeling spreads through her veins, unsure of its origin but happy for it all the same. 

Has she ever felt this before?

“You decided what you’re going to name her, right?”

Anukai took a slow deep breath, feeling Ara’s touch adjust slightly on her stomach.

“Think so.”

The other redhead grinned, once again, her gaze sinking to stare at Anukai’s middle.

“Little Lani…”

The Banuk redhead paused for a moment, her eyes glazing in thought before her grin broadened, yet again.

It feels right.

\------

The two former Banuk found themselves on another walk at sunset through the city, admiring Meridian bathed in lavender and orange hues, as had seemingly become a tradition in the past month or so. The relative chill of the early spring nights in Meridian had given way to the much warmer summer. Their fingers remained firmly intertwined as they talked and dreamed about the future that would soon take hold, laughter often passing effortlessly as they strolled.

As they rounded a street corner, passing through a wide beam of setting sunlight, Anukai happened to glance over at Ikrie, catching her image momentarily bathed in the soft, orange light, the blue and yellow of the Carja silks she wore seemingly glowing more brilliantly as each freckle below her pale eyes came into greater clarity. When Ikrie glanced over at her a moment later, idly tucking some of her dark hair behind one ear, she raised one eyebrow in questioning. Anukai simply responded by squeezing her hand gently and continuing on with their conversation.

Eventually, they came to a pause near a particularly attractive view of the lower village, the redhead’s gaze lingering on the lights and motion beneath them even as she couldn’t help but feel Ikrie’s eyes on her, instead. She held her gaze outward for several moments before finally relenting and turning her gaze to the dark-haired woman beside her. As she did, she found the other woman with a seeming half-smile on her face, an unreadable but soft expression in her eyes.

“What’s that look for?” Anukai asked, a playful lilt in her voice.

“Nothing, just... you’re smiling,” Ikrie replied.

“Oh... so?”

“It looks good on you.”

The redhead’s face quickly grew hot as she felt her corners of her lips twitch into a broader grin.

“Yeah, well… I guess… I just…”

“You don’t have to have a reason,” Ikrie said softly squeezing her hand between them. “I like the idea that you don’t need one, for once.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

There it is, that contentment, the knowledge that Ikrie is  _ home _ , that she’s cared for.

Safe.

_ Loved _ , even.

It’s simple but overwhelming, even if it all seems to blend together at the edges.

No thoughts, only feelings so simple but powerful in their hold on her.

She almost can’t tell where she ends and Lani—

That’s it.

Anukai’s eyes widened as she glanced down, her right hand quickly coming to rest on her middle.

“She okay?” Ikrie asked, brow creasing with worry as she slid into the redhead’s side, reaching for her middle, as well.

Anukai’s smile grew wider, as a feeling of realization washed over her, her hand sliding so her fingers overlapped Ikrie’s slightly.

“She’s perfect.”


	7. Coda

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

Ikrie sat on the edge of the couch in the living space to her shared apartment, her knee bouncing nervously as she tried to sip at a mug of hot tea to quell the anxious feeling in her chest, but it did little to help. Ara’s apartment was not that far away—nothing in Meridian was—but the goodnight shared with Anukai before she had stepped out the doorway with her nearly identical counterpart had been more like sending her off for a long trip. The dark-haired former Banuk’s jaw clenched as she wiped at her eyes forcefully, once again.  


“Stop it…”  


A moment later, the sound of knocking came from the front door and she scrambled to rise from her seat, placing her mug on the low table before her and quickly padding across the room. As she pulled the door open, the figure on the other side jumped in surprise, recoiling with eyebrows raised before a grin settled onto her features.  


“If I didn’t know better I’d say you were waiting for me,” Talanah quipped.  


Ikrie laughed softly.  


“Almost as if…”  


She took a step back, gesturing for the Carja woman to enter, Talanah nodding before stepping into the apartment, shifting a small bag held over one shoulder.  


“Let me take that,” Ikrie offered quickly, reaching for the bag, but the Carja woman shook her head, laughing.  


“ _I’m_ the one who’s supposed to be helping _you_ ,” she shot back. “Don’t worry, I can carry this little sack of clothes.”  


The dark-haired woman bit her lower lip for a moment before nodding, pushing the front door closed behind her and moving toward the kitchenette before Talanah stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.  


“Sit—down,” she said softly, smirking.  


Ikrie begrudgingly followed her orders, taking a seat carefully on the couch, once again, grabbing her mug of tea before sliding back into the seat with a sigh. Talanah placed her bag by the chair adjacent to the couch before making her way to the kitchen, rolling the shoulder the bag had been over with a grimace that she tried to hide from the former Banuk with little success. As the Carja grabbed a mug from the cabinet above the stove, she lifted the kettle from one of the burners, holding one hand just above its side.  


“I just made mine a few minutes before you came,” Ikrie called. “Should still be plenty warm.”  


Talanah nodded, taking some of the tea left out from earlier and steeping her own before returning to the living area, slowly taking a seat in the chair with a groan and a slight grimace. Ikrie opened her mouth to say something, but quickly held her tongue, clamping her jaw shut tightly. Once Talanah had situated herself in the seat, sighing, she blew at the steam rising from her mug and glanced toward the dark-haired woman.  


“So, how’s everything… coming along?” she asked.  


“Fine,” Ikrie shrugged.  


“You seem… energetic.”  


“Well, someone’s had to be, taking care of the two of us,” she laughed.  


“You’re farther along and you’re the one doing all the hard work?” Talanah replied, raising one eyebrow. “Maybe I need to have a word with that girl.”  


“It’s fine,” Ikrie sighed. “We help each other. I was only joking.”  


“Me, too.”  


The former Banuk paused for a moment before laughing, shaking her head as she reached to brush some of her grown-out dark hair out of her face and behind one ear.  


“Going to keep your hair long?”  


She glanced up from her drink toward Talanah to find her adjusting the small container of tea leaves in her mug.  


“I’m starting to like it.”  


“It looks good on you,” the Carja replied, pausing for a moment as she stared back at the former Banuk, her eyes half-closed in thought. “Almost seems… older…”  


“Older?” Ikrie teased, raising one eyebrow.  


“More mature.”  


The former Banuk let out a soft “ah”, nodding as she stared down into her mug.  


“Sorry, just… old age makes me say whatever pops into my head.”  


Ikrie grinned, laughing softly as she glanced back up at the Carja across from her. Despite her joke, Talanah showed very little signs of her age. While Aloy’s hair had only become more streaked with silver, the red tones having become more of an accent rather than a majority, the Carja’s had remained almost entirely raven black, aside from a few hints around her temples. Her face showed fewer cracks and lines, but those that did were most notable at the corners of her eyes and mouth. While she still remained in overall good shape, the lack of truly participating in hunts and other adventures since their return to Meridian had definitely dulled the sharp edge her physique had once held, when they had first met.  


Still, with the general aches and pains Ikrie had lived with for the past several months, she was beginning to feel more on the “old” side, herself, rather than simply “mature”.  


“Makes it entertaining,” the former Banuk said, grinning.  


“Well, I’m glad, because I’m here all night,” Talanah replied, smirking.  


Ikrie nodded, starting slightly before removing one hand from around her mug to lay it alongside her swollen middle.  


“Someone else is excited about that, too, apparently.”  


The Carja’s smirk turned into a soft smile as she glanced down at Ikrie’s hand before the younger woman glanced back up at her. Ikrie paused for a moment before clearing her throat and reaching her hand toward Talanah invitingly. The Carja carefully slid forward in her seat, placing her mug on the low table before them before allowing Ikrie to gently take her wrist, guiding her hand into place. As she did, Talanah’s smile grew broader.  


“He’s feisty today,” she commented.  


“Like I said, excited.”  


“It’s because he knows the fun grandmother’s here.”  


Both women laughed as Talanah left her hand in place for several moments longer, finally running her hand gently back and forth before retracting her arm.  


“Getting close,” she said. “You excited?”  


Ikrie inhaled deeply, nodding as an involuntary grin began to tug at her lips.  


“Yeah… can’t wait.”  


“Certain things will be easier,” Talanah nodded.  


“I—I mean, sure,” Ikrie shrugged, “but…”  


The Carja remained silent as the former Banuk absentmindedly ran one hand over her abdomen, her eyes glazing over slightly.  


“I was excited about the idea, before we even found out,” she said softly, “and once we did…”  


She trailed off, but the broad smile on her face finished the thought for her.  


“Was it your idea, then?”  


Ikrie blinked a few times, the alertness returning to her eyes as she glanced over toward Talanah, once again.  


“What?”  


“The little ones,” the Carja said, taking her mug in hand before pulling the container of tea leaves out of it and carefully setting it on a folded cloth napkin on the table. “Was it your idea, first, or Anukai’s?”  


“Oh…” Ikrie replied, nodding. “It was mine.”  


Talanah paused for a moment, something unreadable crossing her eyes as she nodded, taking a sip from her tea.  


“That doesn’t surprise me, you know.”  


“It doesn’t?” Ikrie shot back, grinning as she raised one eyebrow.  


“It’s not a bad thing,” Talanah replied. “For us, Aloy was the one who—the one who suggested… first.”  


Both women quickly fell silent as Ikrie swallowed heavily, noting how Talanah had quickly hidden behind a sip of her drink, once again.  


“But—uh—anyway, I’m glad you’re excited,” the Carja said. “Kallik’s going to have a good mother if you’re already doting on him this much already.”  


Ikrie’s face quickly grew warm as she mumbled a quiet “thanks” and took a sip from her own drink. Silence fell over them, once again, but it felt much less oppressive than it had moments ago. Finally, Talanah was the one who broke it, once again, taking a deep breath and leaning forward in her seat, once again.  


“Ikrie, I… I’m glad you asked me to come here, tonight,” she said softly.  


“I mean… we decided that each of us needed someone who—wasn’t one of us—to help during the nights, for a bit and…”  


The former Banuk trailed off, her fingers nervously tapping on her mug before she cleared her throat.  


“Well, I thought of you, first.”  


A small smile tugged at Talanah’s lips as she nodded. Several more moments of silence passed before the Carja took a deep breath, placing her mug on the table before them before reaching toward the bag at the side of her chair.  


“Ikrie, I… I know you’ve… always felt a little out of place, here, in Meridian,” she began, undoing the clasps and ties at the top of the bag. “Anukai and Aloy have their ties to each other, but other than through her, you…”  


Talanah trailed off, her motions with the bag pausing as she sighed heavily, glancing back to the dark-haired woman to find her staring back curiously.  


“I’ve been thinking…” the Carja continued, finally turning back to her bag as she opened the top, reaching inside to pull something made of bright fabric from within.  


Ikrie tilted her head curiously as Talanah held the item mostly concealed in her hands for several long moments, her eyes closed, before she took a deep breath and turned fully to the other woman. A moment later, she had unraveled a small tapestry, woven with brilliant golds, reds, whites, and blues that formed rather familiar patterns that Ikrie had grown accustomed to seeing on the various larger banners and tapestries hung about the city. This one, notably, seemed to feature a series of glyphs, each connected with dark lines that created a root-like structure as her eyes followed them toward the bottom.  


“What’s this?” Ikrie asked softly, attempting to sit slightly more upright to get a better view of the tapestry.  


The Carja woman laid the woven item on the table, smoothing it out gently with her hands for a few moments before inhaling deeply.  


“This… is the Khane Padish line,” Talanah said. “It’s a… family heirloom. My mother made it and… well, I ended up with it, whether I wanted it or not.”  


Ikrie’s lips pulled into a thin line as the Carja woman cleared her throat.  


“Anyway, I didn’t pull this out to talk about—all that,” she said. “I brought this to—to give to you.”  


The former Banuk paused, both eyebrows raising as she carefully set her mug on the table away from the tapestry.  


“You’re… giving it to _me_?” she said slowly. “Why?”  


“It… it needed some updating,” Talanah explained., “and… as the Banuk I’ve met have said a few times… it felt fitting to… to offer that your song join… join mine… my family’s.”  


Ikrie’s eyes began to widen as the Carja woman finally managed to glance up toward her, shifting nervously.  


“I just… made it in a physical form,” she said softly. “Wrote it out, if you will.”  


The dark-haired woman glanced toward the tapestry, scanning over the glyphs that she now knew to be names, once again, before turning back to the Carja.  


“W-what… what are you saying, exactly, Talanah?”  


The Carja took another deep breath, turning to Ikrie and reaching forward to gently take one of her hands in both of hers.  


“Things didn’t work the way Aloy and I had planned, but… Carja tradition allows for a family member to confer the family name, and all that it carries with it, to another if they choose. The idea is that in the instance…” Talanah paused, swallowing heavily before continuing, “in the instance that no clear heir exists in that family line, the name does not have to die with that last member.”  


Ikrie’s eyes had grown sufficiently wide as the Carja continued to speak, the first hints of wateriness also forming along the bottom edges, as well.  


“I want this to be yours, now” Talanah continued, her voice soft, nearly a whisper, “and later… it will be Kallik’s.”  


The Carja woman carefully guided Ikrie’s hand to the bottom of the tapestry, placing her fingers just below the last set of names. The former Banuk blinked several times, clearing her vision of the watery distortion that had coated it as she felt the tears run freely down her cheeks. Just above the tips of her fingers, sewn with a deep blue thread, was her own name, written in Carja glyphs. Two lines extended from it, one reaching up to Talanah’s name, while the other curled lower to another in deep blue thread, Ikrie’s fingers shakily brushing over the glyphs for Kallik.  


“I… I hope this isn’t… presuming too much, or…”  


Ikrie quickly shook her head, glancing up toward Talanah, her lower lip quivering as the Carja looked to her hesitantly.  


“I… would be honored… for my song to continue yours.”  


Talanah remained still for a moment before a broad grin overtook her features, as did Ikrie’s, even through the tears streaming across the fields of freckles on her cheekbones. The Carja woman carefully rose from the chair, stiffly maneuvering to take a seat beside Ikrie only for the younger woman to immediately wrap her in a tight embrace. Talanah returned it a moment later, rubbing one hand across the dark-haired girl’s back.  


As Ikrie’s face was quickly buried in the Carja’s shoulder, tears of her own began to roll from Talanah’s eyes, the tightness of the former Banuk’s grip not lost on her. After several long moments, they finally pulled apart, Ikrie wiping at her eyes with the back of one hand as she tried to steady her breathing.  


Her gaze fell on the tapestry, once again, before the broad smile pulled at her lips and she glanced down at her abdomen, running one hand slowly across it.  


“You hear that, Kal?” she said. “You’ve got an important song to carry.”  


A moment later, she laughed, her hand freezing in place on her middle as she glanced up toward Talanah, once again.  


“I think he likes it, too.”


	8. Firstborn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original draft by NorthernGhost, edited/revised by imagine0314.

The sound of her own heart beating had been a near constant in her ears from the moment Anukai had awoken. Gray, pre-dawn light streamed into their bedroom accompanied by Ikrie’s vice grip on her right arm. Even before she had fully awoken or had registered her mate’s words, she knew what it had meant. The scramble to gather herself and clamber from bed had passed in the blink of an eye, leaving her standing before Ara on the couch, rousing the bleary-eyed redhead with an intense sense of urgency.

The two of them had managed to gather the various prepared bags and supplies before turning to Ikrie, finding the dark-haired woman sitting on the edge of the bed and breathing deeply, her eyes squeezed shut. With a quick call to Aloy, Anukai had finally collected her mate, helping her to her feet and beginning to walk her gingerly toward the living room.

True to her Banuk roots, Ikrie had refused to simply allow herself too much assistance from the redheads, insisting that she could still bear to walk without much fanfare. Still, the trip to the Palace had been long, and Anukai had wished they could somehow get there already several times before they actually arrived. At the foot of the bridge, they had found Bekan and the older couple waiting, along with the typical overnight contingency of the Palace guards.

“Would you look at that? By the sun…”

Ikrie continued to trudge forward, her arms now around Anukai’s and Ara’s shoulders, her mate well aware of how labored her breathing had become, and how her jaw clenched in pain. The last stretch to the infirmary had been the longest of the journey, but once they had arrived, two of the healers on duty had quickly ushered them into a room, easing Ikrie onto the bed.

The hours had passed slowly, agonizingly, since then and Anukai found herself returning to the moment as Ikrie’s hand gripped her right wrist tightly, once again. The redhead blinked away her fatigue-induced daze, turning to her mate and moving closer.

“How’re you doing?” she asked, reaching up to carefully brush aside some of the dark locks plastered to Ikrie’s sweat-coated forehead with her left hand.

The dark-haired woman leaned her face into the back of the metal appendage, prompting Anukai to flatten her hand, placing it against her cheek.

“Feels… cool…” Ikrie muttered.

“You’re flush,” the redhead laughed. “Anything would right now.”

The dark-haired woman moaned softly, squirming on the bed as she squeezed her eyes shut tightly, once again.

“Really… really happening…” she muttered.

“We knew it would.”

“Still…”

Anukai smiled gently down at her, continuing to brush her hair aside while she gripped Ikrie’s hand tightly at her side.

“Our old Werak would be proud,” she said softly.

“W-why?”

“You practically walked all the way here, yourself,” Anukai said with an air of amusement. “You’re making me a little intimidated with that strength.”

Ikrie laughed, but the sound was caught somewhere halfway to a whimper, as well.

“You… intimidated…?” she panted. “Wish I could savor this moment more.”

Anukai smirked, leaning in as best she could to place a kiss against Ikrie’s temple before the dark-haired woman moaned loudly.

“We’re getting close,” the healer standing near the foot of the bed said, eyeing the scene before her warily.

“Oh good…” Ikrie breathed, her chest heaving. “Feels like… been a… a thousand years.”

Anukai shook her head, glancing toward the healer to see her smirking, as well.

“Looks like we’ll be back here with you soon enough, too,” she commented, noting the redhead’s swollen middle.

Anukai’s lips pulled into a thin line as she glanced down, but nodded.

“Well, take notes, because so far she’s doing amazingly,” the healer continued, turning her gaze back to Ikrie. “You said she’s Banuk?”

“We both… were…”

The healer paused for a moment before nodding.

“I’m sure you will both do fine,” she replied. “The Banuk are strong. Survivors. Hopefully you pass those traits on to your children, too.”

Ikrie’s cries brought their focus back to her, the dark-haired woman leaning her head back into the pillow behind her as she gasped for air.

“I’m going to grab a few things. _You_ keep breathing,” the healer instructed Ikrie, before turning to point at Anukai, “And _you_ keep her calm. If anyone wants to leave, now’s the time.”

The old woman turned and exited through the door quickly but quietly, leaving the women alone, the space suddenly much more intimate.

“Don’t… don’t go…” she managed, her head lolling to one side to meet Anukai’s gaze. “What… whatever they… say… stay… right there… please…both of you.”

“Not going anywhere,” the redhead said resolutely, nodding.  
  
“Not a chance,” Talanah added.

Anukai glanced toward the opposite side of the bed, where Talanah sat in a chair near Ikrie’s side, her fingers tapping nervously on her leg. Anukai noted the uneasy shifting of her body, the Carja seemingly unable to sit still. The others had been asked to wait outside to avoid a large crowd in the relatively small infirmary room, but while Anukai had been the clear choice to stay, the healer had also recommended one more _able-bodied_ member also remain, just in case.

There had been no hesitation in Ikrie’s choice.

The Carja met Anukai’s gaze and offered a small, encouraging smile before the redhead nodded, indicating for her to get closer. Talanah’s eyebrows raised, and she pushed away from the back of the chair, now perched on its edge. Ikrie’s gaze quickly turned to her, the former Banuk’s hand reaching toward her, as well. The Carja paused for a moment before taking it in her right hand, not daring to complain even as Anukai saw how white Ikrie’s knuckles turned from her grip.

“Feeling ready?” Talanah asked.

“Hope so…” Ikrie managed. “Thank you… for staying…”

“Of course,” the Carja replied, smiling warmly. “I wouldn’t want to miss seeing the newest Khane Padish enter the world.”

The dark-haired woman drew in a deep breath, hissing between clenched teeth before squeezing her eyes shut for a moment and forcing them open again. When she did, she found they met the Carja’s, Talanah’s gaze never once wavering.

“You… still… ah... mean it?”

“Of course,” Talanah replied, nodding, adopting a serious expression as she raised her other hand to place it over the top of Ikrie’s. “Every day I’m reminded that I made a good choice… especially today. You’re… you’ve done me a great honor by letting my family’s name live on.”

Ikrie offered a wide smile before the expression warped back into discomfort, a moan emanating from deep in her chest. The sound of another groan of pain from the former Banuk appeared to have summoned the healer, the old woman moving quickly to check on her progress before glancing up at the other two, nodding as she adopted a serious expression.

“I think this will be it.”

Both women standing by the bed inhaled deeply, glancing at each other before turning down to Ikrie between them.

“You’re ready,” Anukai said, shaking her mate’s hand, as there was no possible way she could have squeezed it tighter in that moment.

Ikrie met her gaze, once again, and for a moment she was able to force the beginnings of a smile before her entire body grew tense and she let out a drawn-out scream of pain. The healer remained at the foot of the bed, but offered encouragement to the dark-haired woman, Anukai whispering something low and intense to her while Talanah appeared to utter a continuous prayer. Their words came steady and firm, somehow seeming to imbue the dark-haired woman with their power. Hot tears began to leak from Ikrie’s eyes as she pressed back against the bed and pillows behind her, jaw clenched tightly as her grip somehow seemed to grow stronger around their hands.

Finally, after several long cries of pain, she seemed to draw in a deep breath before eliciting another, although this time it seemed to come from somewhere much deeper in her chest, much rawer. This time, it trailed off into a sound like a gasp at the end, the sound fading into a new one, a much higher-pitched and piercing one.

Anukai’s eyes widened as her head whipped around to the foot of the bed, where the healer was moving carefully, but with a set of motions that told her she had done this countless times before. Finally, a few moments later, she pulled back from the foot of the bed, bringing with her something wrapped in a small blanket, the healer working quickly to carefully wipe and clean the charge held within.

As the healer continued her ministrations, the redhead turned back to her mate, immediately reaching to wipe the hair away from her face as Ikrie breathed heavily, her head lolling to one side.

“You did it,” Anukai breathed. “You did it.”

The sound of the newborn’s cries continued to fill the room as the healer completed her tasks, quickly transferring the infant to a new, clean blanket and bringing him toward the couple.

“I’m happy to say that you two have a healthy boy on your hands,” she said, grinning between the two of them. “Congratulations.”

She carefully handed the bundle to Ikrie, who took it graciously, pushing the corners of the blanket aside before letting out a loud sob.

“He’s… he’s here, Anukai!”

The redhead nodded, tears of her own beginning to spill down her cheeks as Ikrie glanced up at her, an incredulous look on her face.

“I… we did it…”

“ _You_ did this one,” the redhead laughed, leaning in to get a better look at the newest addition to their small family, “that much is clear.”

They both stared down at the tiny boy crying and squirming in Ikrie’s arms, the tuft of dark hair atop his head already visible. From the first minute of his arrival, it was obvious he had taken after his mother, the resemblance already clear.

They both continued to marvel, sob, and laugh over the tiny boy in Ikrie’s arms for a minute or two before Anukai spared a glance up toward Talanah, finding the Carja wiping at her eyes, unable to fully stem the flow of the tears that rolled down her cheeks. Ikrie followed her mate’s gaze before nodding for Talanah to shift even closer. The raven-haired woman slowly closed the gap, leaning forward to better see the newborn.

Almost immediately, one of her hands came to rest on Ikrie’s shoulder, a soft gasp escaping the older woman, although her expression quickly adopted a broad smile. They all remained silent, save for the soft sounds of sniffling and occasional sobs or laughter that seemed to force its way out of the three of them. After several minutes, the healer cleared her throat, bringing their attention to her.

“I hate to interrupt, but… does the little one have a name?” she asked. “We can commit it to public record right now, if you wish, and while doing that I can leave you all with some time alone.”

Ikrie and Anukai exchanged glances before both of them nodded.

“Kallik Khane Padish,” the new mother said, turning back to the healer.

The other woman raised her eyebrows as she began to gather some of her things.

“A Khane Padish?” she said, glancing at Talanah with a smirk. “Consider it my honor, then, that I could help you, this day. You must be a very proud--”

“--Grandmother,” Ikrie cut in, the old healer nodding in understanding.

Talanah offered a smile, her lip quivering slightly before mouthing a silent “thank you” to the younger woman before wiping at her eyes quickly, once again. Ikrie reached for the older woman’s hand, giving her a brief squeeze that lingered for several moments.

When they finally parted, Talanah offered a small nod to the healer before she excused herself, sitting back and tapping at the Focus beside her ear. Anukai caught her motion, and a moment later, three other figures stepped inside. Immediately, Aloy made her way toward the side of the bed alongside Talanah, coming to a stop beside her mate as she wrapped one arm behind her back.

“How are you doing, Ikrie?” she asked.

“Everything hurts but… better now that he’s here, though,” the new mother replied, grinning as she glanced down toward the boy, once again.

Aloy and Talanah switched places so the older redhead could get a better look, a soft “aw” escaping her before she turned back to Ikrie.

“Congratulations,” she said. “Did the name stick?”

Ikrie nodded. “Kallik suits him.”

 _“Kal,”_ Anukai teased.  
  
“Oh hush,” Ikrie retorted.

“Well, I hope _Kallik_ inherits his mother’s strength and resilience, because I am firmly impressed today,” Aloy laughed. “You did good.”

Ikrie grinned, nodding in thanks before glancing toward the other two, who had hung back closer to the foot of the bed. Ara and Bekan straightened up under her gaze, raising their eyebrows slightly.

“You can come say hello, too,” the dark-haired woman said, laughing.

Ara smirked and began to move alongside Anukai, leaning in to take a closer look at the tiny boy. Immediately, the other redhead seemed to freeze before a grin tugged at her lips, her head tilting slightly.

“Hey there, little man,” she said.

Ara bent low, giving Ikrie a one-armed hug before speaking softly at her side, the words practically whispered between them.

“You made my--you’ve made Anukai really happy today, you know that? You’re amazing.”

“Thanks,” the new mother replied, smirking.

Ara glanced toward Anukai for a moment, prompting the braided redhead to roll her eyes and bump her shoulder playfully. With that, Ara slid aside, glancing back at Bekan, who nervously approached, stopping a foot or so from Anukai. Swallowing heavily, he glanced between them before taking his turn to glance down at the little one, grinning at the sight of him.

“Congratulations, you two,” he said, straightening up, once again.

“Thanks, Bekan,” Ikrie said, nodding.

Anukai also placed a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it for a moment as he mimicked the gesture, both of them nodding before he cleared his throat and moved toward the door.

“I need to—uh—make sure the shift change goes smoothly,” he said, waving goodbye before quickly slipping out of the room, his face slowly turning red.

In the wake of his departure, the three still standing near the bed turned their attention back to Ikrie as she laid her head back on the pillows behind her, Anukai adjusting them so that she could still easily see Kallik against her chest. With a grin, the redhead glanced up toward the older women across from them, noting how Aloy was already staring back at her. They exchanged a glance before the silver-streaked redhead gently tugged on Talanah’s arm. The Carja glanced back at her before nodding and following her toward the far side of the room, leaving Anukai and Ikrie alone.

“It… I can’t believe it…” the new mother sighed. “This… crazy idea… I feel like I just asked you yesterday, and now…”

“Wasn’t so crazy, then,” Anukai replied, grinning, “but I know what you mean. It feels like… one day and a thousand years, at once.”

Ikrie laughed softly, carefully reaching toward Anukai with one hand as the redhead took it in hers, squeezing it gently.

“Thank you,” the dark-haired woman sighed.

“Oh?”

“For… for going along with this…”

Anukai inhaled deeply, running her thumb over the back of Ikrie’s hand.

“I _want_ this, too, Ikrie,” she said. “I didn’t…. I’m not _just_ going along with it…”

With a short laugh, the redhead glanced down at her swollen middle.

“I’m a little too far into this not to _mean_ it.”

Ikrie shot her an apologetic smile.

“I didn’t think it would end up exactly like this…”

“Neither did I,” Anukai replied quickly, “but here we are. I wouldn’t change it for anything.”

“ _Two_ ,” Ikrie mused, glancing at her mate.  
  
“Let’s get used to _one_ , while we can,” Anukai smirked. 

The dark-haired woman paused for a moment before nodding, a smile tugging at her lips. A moment later, she leaned in, pressing a soft, but passionate kiss against her mate. The two of them pulled apart slowly, although Anukai kept her forehead pressed against Ikrie’s, inhaling slowly through her nose. A few moments later, she pulled back, glancing down toward the tiny Kallik, again.

“You hear that, Kal?” she said softly. “Your mothers are so excited you’re here.”


	9. (Un)Deserved

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original draft by NorthernGhost, edited/revised by imagine0314.

Anukai’s eyes fluttered open as she shifted restlessly in bed, her eyelids squeezing shut tightly again a moment later. Finally, when she couldn’t get settled, she sighed, her eyes cracking open, once again, as her right hand fell to her truly swollen middle.

“I thought you were supposed to keep me up _after_ you were born,” she grumbled.

Realizing that she had spoken aloud, she paused, turning to glance over her shoulder, only to find the other half of the bed empty. Confusion creased her face as she rolled partially onto her back, reaching across the mattress to confirm that she hadn’t somehow missed Ikrie’s shape in the darkness, but she only found the sheets and thin comforter thrown back, as if the other occupant had slipped away, already.

Frowning, the redhead dragged herself to a sitting position with some amount of effort, sighing heavily once her feet touched the floor beside the bed. She glanced toward the dark shape of Kal’s crib past the foot of the bed, but didn’t see any signs of motion, prompting her frown to deepen, still. With a groan, she rose to a standing position, teetering in place for a moment or two before shuffling toward the door to the bedroom. When she reached it, she found the wooden portal cracked open, prompting the hair to stand up on the back of her neck.

Pulling it open quietly, she scanned the hallway beyond, but found it dark, save for the soft flicker of light that emanated around the outside edges of the first door to her left. Moving as quietly and as carefully as she could, Anukai slid over to the partially lit doorway, finding it shut fully. Taking a deep breath, she took hold of the knob and turned it, carefully cracking the door a few inches to see inside.

Immediately, she could tell that the light was from a candle lit on top of a bureau by the door, but she couldn’t see much else in the room. As she pushed the door open farther, the rest of the nursery began to come into view. The space where Kal’s crib would one day go when he wasn’t sleeping in their bedroom was made especially apparent by the second candle softly flickering atop the small, wooden table placed against the far wall, but as her gaze swept to the left, it paused on motion near the adjacent wall. Anukai’s brow creased in concern at the shape of Ikrie seated in one of the two rocking chairs within the room, a smaller, blanket-swaddled form held close to her chest.

“Ikrie?” the redhead rasped, her voice rough with sleep.

The dark-haired woman startled, lifting her head quickly before sighing.

“You should go back to bed,” she replied softly.

“Needed to make sure you’re okay…”

“I’m fine, Anukai.”

The redhead chewed the inside of her cheek slowly for a moment or two before she sighed and slipped farther into the nursery, prompting the other woman’s shoulders to sag slightly.

“I said I’m fine.”

“Ikrie…”

“Kal was just… he was hungry…”

“I’m sure he was, but… I can see what you’re doing…”

The dark-haired woman remained silent, staring down at the less-than-one-month-old in her arms, the tension in her jaw visible even in the barely candle-lit darkness.

“Ikrie, we already talked to GAIA…”

“Maybe… maybe she was wrong,” she muttered.

“Ikrie, we checked everything, we tried everything—”

“Maybe for _once_ , I want her to be fucking wrong.”

Anukai stopped halfway across the room, a shiver running down her spine at the dark intensity to Ikrie’s voice. A moment later, her mate sighed exasperatedly, hanging her head.

“She _has_ to be wrong…”

“Ikrie… we know she isn’t…”

“ _You_ decided she isn’t!” the dark-haired woman snapped, her gaze instantly lifting to meet her mate’s, again. “It isn’t you and _your_ child, though!”

“Ikrie… please… I’m not insulting you… and I don’t want to fight you…”

“But you’re not the one who can’t feed her own child, herself!”

The redhead squeezed her eyes shut, hanging her head slowly as her right hand subconsciously rubbed at her middle, once again, her left hand curling into a tight fist at her side.

“I-I’m sorry, Anukai…” Ikrie said softly. “It’s just… _I’m_ supposed to take care of him… and I can’t even do _this_ , never mind help you get ready…”

The redhead opened her eyes, once again, taking a deep breath before closing the gap between them and placing a hand on her mate’s shoulder. Less than a foot away, she could clearly see Ikrie’s loosened tunic, the pale, freckled skin of her chest illuminated in the flickering candlelight, and Kal squirming, seemingly in frustration, in her arms.

“You’re not neglecting him by using the formula GAIA gave us,” she said softly.

“But… there’s… _more_ than just… him not going hungry…”

“He’s not losing a connection with you,” Anukai soothed, sliding her hand from her mate’s shoulder to run her fingers through her loose, shoulder-length locks of dark hair. “It’s just one small piece out of the many that you’re giving him.”

A sound like a sob escaped Ikrie as her mate’s hand slid alongside her face, cupping her cheek gently.

“He knows his mother, Ikrie.”

“But I’m _supposed_ to do this!” she shot back, her tone wavering on the verge of cracking with each word. “I-if I’m… his mother… then why can’t I…?”

“GAIA said—”

“GAIA is a _machine_ , Anukai.”

The redhead froze, her eyes widening slightly as the dark-haired woman’s gaze lifted to meet hers, her pale eyes shining slightly in the candlelight.

“She can tell me all the specific reasons why my body won’t do what it’s supposed to, but she can’t tell me how to _feel_ about it.”

“Ikrie…”

“I feel like a _failure_ , Anukai.”

The redhead’s lower lip began to quiver as her thumb stilled from where it had run back and forth across her mate’s cheek. Ikrie’s chest was heaving slightly as she stared back at her, a look of something bordering on despair in her eyes.

“Y-you’re… you’re not…”

“Maybe… maybe this was wrong.” Ikrie interrupted, her voice hoarse. “GAIA said this would work… said it would be just like everyone else, just… skipping the part I didn’t want to do… but maybe she was wrong…”

“I-Ikrie, no…”

“Maybe this whole thing was fucking wrong!” she shrieked, her voice suddenly much louder, but Anukai refused to shrink away. “I wasn’t _supposed_ to have him… he wasn’t _supposed_ to exist, and all this is just my body telling—”

“Ikrie, stop!”

Both of them fell silent as their voices echoed about the room for several moments. In the wake of their shouting, Kal’s cries began to build, the small boy clearly frightened by the loud outburst so close to him. Ikrie remained still for several long moments before a sound like a sob escaped her and she broke eye contact with her mate, turning down to the small boy in her arms, rocking him gently and stroking her fingers along his small face, quickly turning red as his crying continued.

“Maybe… maybe I don’t deserve him…”

Something in Anukai finally seemed to give way, as well, and she let out a wet sob, leaning forward to attempt to press her forehead against Ikrie’s, but the motion nearly through her off balance and she began to stagger toward the rocking chair. She managed to catch herself at the last moment, twisting around to grip at the edge of the small table nearby with her left hand, sure that its grip would hold, before lowering herself toward the floor as her knees began to give out.

The redhead finally came to a stop on the wooden surface, ignoring the jolt of pain that shot up her tailbone from the contact, as she released the top of the table, leaning her head back against one of the legs for a moment as the sobs continued to shake her chest. Ikrie rose from her seat on the rocking chair, continuing to rock and bounce Kal gently in her arms for several long moments until he finally began to calm, his cries slowly become less severe, although he didn’t entirely fall silent.

A few moments later, she carefully sank into a seat on the floor beside Anukai. Almost immediately, the redhead wrapped an arm behind her back and leaned her weight into the dark-haired woman, turning to bury her face in her shoulder.

“You’re not a failure,” Anukai said, her voice rough and strained. “You _do_ deserve him. Kal is _lucky_ to have you as a mother.”

“But—”

“I can never get him to fall asleep, to quiet down, anything… but he does all of that when you’re there, so easily…”

“It just means I’m familiar to him.”

“It means he _wants_ you,” Anukai shot back. “He’s sad—scared—whichever—when he doesn’t have his mother. You _want_ him too, right?”

Ikrie nodded, biting her lower lip as it began to tremble, once again.

“Then it’s not wrong. He’s here… and you brought him here—carried him for nine months. _You_ did that. Not a machine. Ever since he got here… I’ve seen you give him nothing less than everything you can. I… I feel bad for taking away from that for this month… but soon I’ll be more help… less of a burden…”

“You’re not—”

“Even then,” Anukai interrupted, squeezing her mate’s side more tightly against her, “you are no less of his mother just because he eats using the formula GAIA gave us. He’s fed and healthy, and you’re still giving it to him, just… in a bit of a different way.”

Ikrie remained silent for several long moments before letting out another loud sob, leaning her weight back against Anukai, as well. Her head tilted to one side, coming to rest atop the redhead’s as her body noticeably wracked with each sob, still. Anukai squeezed her mate tightly with her right arm, massaging her fingers firmly against Ikrie’s side, just above her hip.

“You have never failed me,” she whispered, “and you have not failed him, now. I’m sure you won’t, though.”

After several long moments, Ikrie sniffled loudly, stirring from her position against her mate.

“He’s still hungry, I should…”

Anukai nodded, releasing her hold on her mate so that Ikrie could clamber to her feet. As she did, she glanced down at the redhead.

“I’ll be right back.”

She nodded in response as the dark-haired woman quickly slipped out of the room, disappearing into the hallway beyond. Anukai groaned, shifting her position uncomfortably for a moment or two, the aches and pains of sitting on the wood floor finally registering now that she had a moment to focus on something else.

“Not making this easy for me,” she sighed, running her hand over her middle, once again, before using her left hand to help pull herself to her feet.

Finally, when she was standing, she let out a heavy sigh, grimacing as she rubbed at her lower back, the area painful to the touch, so she gave up on it a moment later. Glancing about the room, she turned to the candle on the table behind her, blowing it out before moving toward the door, once again. Extinguishing the last candle by the door, she made her way back into the hallway, returning to their bedroom at the far end and taking a seat on the edge of the bed with a heavy sigh.

Anukai glanced toward the open doorway, not seeing any signs of motion amidst the darkness, before turning to the table beside the bed and reaching for the Focus atop it. Once she had placed it beside her ear, she quickly brought up the messaging option, typing out a brief message as quickly as she could before hitting the “send” option. As soon as she did, she heard the sounds of footsteps approaching in the hallway outside.

“Anukai?”

“In here!” she called back, removing the Focus from beside her ear and tossing it onto the bedside table, once again.

Ikrie appeared in the doorway a moment later, Kal held in the crook of her right arm while she held the bottle of formula in her left.

“We’re both already up,” the redhead shrugged, “can feed him in here.”

The dark-haired woman nodded, moving to take a seat on the edge of the bed beside her mate, adjusting her grip on Kal for a moment or two before offering the bottle to him. The small boy quickly took to it, falling silent as he drank in the warm formula. In the silence that hung over them, Anukai slid beside her mate, pressing against her side and wrapping one arm behind her, once again. Ikrie glanced over at her, offering a small, sad smile as Anukai returned it, leaning her head against the dark-haired one beside her.

After a few minutes, Kal seemed to have had his fill and Ikrie took the bottle away from him, handing it to Anukai as she adjusted the blanket around Kal, running her fingers along the side of his face as she cooed softly to him. The small boy grabbed at her fingers as he blinked slowly, his eyelids drawing more and more closed each time. When he was just about still, she sighed, beginning to rise from her seat.

As Anukai began to swing her legs onto the bed, stretching out atop their sheets, she saw Ikrie moving to place Kal back in his crib.

“You two come to bed,” she interjected, grinning, “both of you.”

Her mate paused, glancing back at her before turning to approach the opposite side of the bed. Anukai pat the empty half beside her, prompting Ikrie to laugh softly. Carefully, she took a seat on the edge of the bed and began to stretch out on it, as well. Before she could fully turn, however, the redhead began to tug at the back of her sleeveless, cotton top, prompting Ikrie to pause, letting out a noise in confusion.

“Trust me,” Anukai laughed softly, “get this thing off.”

Ikrie rolled her eyes, but carefully laid Kal on the bed beside her before doing as her mate instructed, tossing her top toward the end of the bed. When she laid on the bed, this time, Anukai guided her to carefully lay Kal against her chest, partially unwrapping the blanket from around him, but leaving it covering his back. The small boy seemed to stir slightly, but very quickly seemed to get comfortable as his tiny hands grabbed at the warm skin of Ikrie’s chest for a moment or two. Finally, he seemed to fully fall still and asleep, prompting Anukai to grin and glance up to meet her mate’s gaze.

“Told you,” she whispered.

Ikrie smiled back at her, this time with much less of a sense of sadness behind it. Anukai carefully stretched forward toward her, pressing a gentle kiss against her shoulder, the best she could do with her current shape. With a sigh, she laid on her side, facing Ikrie, feeling her own eyelids beginning to draw closed quickly. Just before they pulled closed completely, she caught one last glimpse of her mate staring down at the tiny boy held to her chest, a small smile on her features as she ran her hand slowly over his back.

\------

Kal had thankfully slept for most of the rest of the night, only beginning to truly wake and rouse his sleeping mother at sunrise. Ikrie had taken him out of the bedroom, bringing the formula bottle with her, as quickly as she could to avoid waking Anukai. The dark-haired woman had remained with him in the living space of the apartment for another hour or two before her mate shuffled out of the hallway, yawning deeply.

“How long you been up?” Anukai mumbled.

“Hour or two,” Ikrie shrugged.

“’M sorry…”

“Didn’t want to wake you,” she replied, grinning. “You need your sleep.”

“Guess I should get as much as I can now, huh?”

Shortly after, Kal had fallen asleep, giving Ikrie enough time to wash up and change into more normal clothes for the day, donning a blue-and-yellow silk top that she actually thought might have been Anukai’s and a pair of yellow and red, thicker fabric leggings. Once they had eaten breakfast, the redhead had dragged herself to their bedroom, changing into the loose clothing she had begrudgingly adopted over the last few months. Almost as soon as she was dressed, the sound of a loud knocking came from the front door and Ikrie slipped over to it, pulling it open.

“Morning,” she said, grinning.

“I still remember the days when we would wake you two up if we showed up at this time,” Aloy quipped, smirking. “Now, look at you.”

“Well… a few things changed,” Ikrie replied, glancing down at Kal in the crook of her arm as she bounced him slightly.

As she stepped aside, allowing Aloy to enter, she noted that Talanah had also arrived with her; confusion came over the dark-haired woman as she tried to recall whether Anukai had mentioned meeting both of them or just Aloy to her the other day. A moment later, the silver-streaked redhead leaned in to greet Kal, bringing Ikrie back to the present as the small boy gurgled happily, prompting Aloy to grin broadly before moving aside so Talanah could also step in.

“Good morning, little Kallik,” the Carja cooed, tickling at his stomach as she smiled down at him. “You’re looking like trouble, today. You aren’t, though, right?”

Ikrie rolled her eyes as Talanah laughed softly, tickling at Kal one last time before straightening up once again, rolling her left shoulder painfully for a moment as she grimaced.

“Anukai’s just getting dressed,” Ikrie said, turning toward Aloy. “She woke up after me.”

“So some things haven’t fully changed, I see,” the older woman nodded, smirking.

“I hear you talking about me!”

A moment later, Anukai appeared at the end of the hallway, shooting Aloy an admonishing look as the older redhead laughed.

“You ready, kid?”

“Think so,” she nodded before turning to her mate. “You going to be okay here until the afternoon?”

“Yes, Anukai,” Ikrie sighed, rolling her eyes. “We’ll be just fine.”

The redhead smiled softly, taking to the task of pulling her boots on with some difficulty before finally dragging herself to her feet, once again, groaning.

“Almost there…” she muttered, rubbing at her middle for a moment before nodding toward Aloy. “Shall we?”

They moved to exit the apartment, but Ikrie noted that Talanah seemed to hang back, prompting the dark-haired woman to glance toward her curiously. The Carja shot her a sheepish grin before swallowing nervously.

“I’ll hang back with Ikrie, for a bit,” she said, standing in the doorway behind the departing redheads.

They both nodded, and the young couple exchanged a quick goodbye kiss before Talanah pushed the door closed after them.

“Afraid you’d be bored all day?” Ikrie teased, glancing toward the older woman beside her.

Talanah bit her lower lip for a moment before sighing.

“Not exactly,” she said, turning to face her, a look of concern on her face. “I wanted to see how you were doing… you know… talk a bit…”

Ikrie frowned, adjusting her grip on Kal slightly.

“About?”

The Carja sighed, rubbing at her left upper arm slowly.

“Anukai messaged me last night.”

The former Banuk let out a short “ah” but otherwise fell silent, her lips pulling into a thin line.

“What did she say?”

“Just that she wanted me to talk with you,” she replied. “Nothing specific.”

“Well… I-I’m always glad to talk, Talanah…”

“Something’s clearly bothering you,” the Carja cut in, “and whatever it is, it’s bad enough that Anukai would message me in the middle of the night. She’s just concerned, Ikrie.”

The younger woman sighed, nodding.

“I’m… I’m sure she is… after last night…”

Talanah frowned before glancing to her left and gesturing toward the couch.

“Take a seat?”

Ikrie obliged, sinking onto the couch as Talanah took a seat beside her, notably closer than her typical perch in the nearby armchair.

“What happened last night?”

The younger woman drew a deep breath before recounting the previous night’s events, Talanah’s expression growing softer and more concerned with each passing sentence, while Ikrie noted that she continued to slide closer and closer on the couch, as well. When she finally finished, the Carja’s face was left in a small, sad smile. The younger woman nodded slightly, looking down at Kal as she found herself unable to meet the amber eyes across from her instead taking solace in the sleepy, pale eyes of the small boy in her arms.

A moment later, one of Talanah’s hands came to rest on the crook of her elbow and she startled slightly, but glanced over at her.

“I… I can certainly understand your… fear,” the Carja said softly. “But you know you _do_ deserve him, right? You do.”

The younger woman shifted uncomfortably, her head bowing low. “But I can’t even take care of him like I’m _supposed_ to. What if I...what if I did this all _wrong_ , Talanah?” she muttered softly.

The Carja fell silent for a moment, drawing a deep breath as she glanced down at her knees for a moment. “I’ve felt that I don’t… deserve things… _people_ … too, you know.”

Ikrie frowned as Talanah sighed heavily, again, glancing up at her, once again, to reveal the first hints of wateriness in the Carja’s eyes.

“Aloy and I never got this… not until you two came along. And we both know it wasn’t normal. It wasn’t _expected_ , we didn’t do this _right_ . Aloy wanted all of this so _badly_ and… then you girls came into our lives and it changed so much for us. And sometimes… I felt like I didn’t deserve it. Didn’t deserve _you_.”

The raven-haired woman sniffled slightly, running the back of one hand across her eyes before glancing down at her knees.

“I… part of me wanted to convince myself that… that it was just Aloy’s thing, and this… it couldn’t be mine, in any way… that it _shouldn’t_ be…”

Ikrie’s face began to contort into an expression of sympathy as the Carja continued to not meet her gaze.

“I… over time I started to realize that… that maybe it could… that just because it wasn’t—because it didn’t happen the ‘normal’ way didn’t… didn’t mean that… that it couldn’t…”

Ikrie shifted her position, adjusting her grip on Kal so that she turned her right arm, sliding Talanah’s hand from her elbow to grip it in her own, squeezing the Carja’s tightly.

“Talanah…”

“I… I guess I’m just trying to say that… I know what it is to feel like you aren’t worthy of the good things. Like it’ll all disappear if you don’t live up to it. I hope that you can feel that… that it’s just your head messing with you.”

The Carja finally lifted her gaze to meet Ikrie’s, the wet lines clearly visible on her face, streaking the makeup she had applied below her eyes.

“Something amazing came into your life,” Talanah continued softly, “and I’m old enough to know that you don’t need to question where it came from. I… I can’t picture my life without all of you. Could you picture yours without Anukai? Kal? And in a few weeks, another little one? You _deserve_ it all, Ikrie. There’s no question.”

The two women remained silent for several long moments before Ikrie offered a small, sad smile and nodded. Carefully adjusting her hold on Kal, she leaned in toward Talanah, wrapping her free arm behind her shoulders and pulling the Carja into an embrace. Talanah returned it with both of hers, her grip shaking ever so slightly as she did. When they finally pulled apart, the Carja continued to wipe at her eyes, only to glance down at the back of her hand and laugh wetly.

“Of course… dumb of me to put any of this on this morning…”

“I’ve got some you gave me here,” Ikrie replied. “You can use it.”

Talanah laughed more sincerely this time, nodding as she glanced up at the younger woman beside her.

“Knew it would come in use, eventually.”

They both laughed for several moments until it faded into silence, but this time it was much more comfortable. It still hung heavily, but more like a warm blanket on a winter’s night, rather than a landslide bearing down on them. The sound of Kal beginning to fuss drew their attention, Ikrie cooing and speaking softly to her son as she rocked him gently in her arms, but turned him so Talanah could see more clearly.

“By the Sun, he looks so much like you already,” the Carja quipped, grinning as she tilted her head slightly to look down at him, her right hand stroking at his cheek. “Those eyes… like little bolts of lightning… he’s gonna be a swooner one day.”

Ikrie laughed, shaking her head as she glanced over at Talanah.

“Don’t make me scared, already.”


	10. Welcome

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By NorthernGhost

Ikrie found herself unable to hold back the smile that tugged at her lips, brought on by the incredibly forceful feeling in her chest, like something radiating out from her heart threatened to burst through her ribs at any moment. The image of the redhead, hair plastered to the sides of her face and her skin still flush, with a look of pure incredulity on her face as she stared down at the small bundle held against her chest was one that immediately felt as if it would be burned into her memory. The dark-haired woman held back for a moment longer before carefully stepping forward, placing one hand on Anukai’s shoulder and prompting her to glance over quickly.

“I-Ikrie… she’s… look at her!” she breathed, quickly turning her attention back to the tiny form in her arms.

The dark-haired woman nodded, taking a precarious seat on the edge of the bed beside the redhead, sliding her hand to her opposite shoulder as she leaned downward slightly until she could truly make out the face under the blanket, just beneath a tuft of reddish hair.

“She’s gonna look a lot like you,” Ikrie said quietly, grinning.

“Told you those Sobeck genes were strong.”

The dark-haired woman rolled her eyes before they both broke into laughter. After what felt like hours, Ikrie cleared her throat, leaning her head atop Anukai’s.

“You’re sure about the name?”

“It’s a little late now, isn’t it?”

“It’s been less than an hour, there’s still technically time,” Ikrie teased.

Anukai sighed, nodding.

“I’m sure.”

The dark-haired woman smiled broadly, rubbing at the redhead’s shoulder gently before carefully reaching forward to run her thumb gently along the side of the newborn’s face.

“Talanah Sobeck,” she said softly, pulling her hand away to bring it to rest on Anukai’s left arm. “I think she’ll carry that name—and the looks—well.”

It was a long afternoon in the infirmary, with the parade of visitors slowly trickling in over the course of it. Bekan had been one of the first, awkwardly shuffling in and offering his congratulations before stating he had to return to duty and making his exit. Not long after, Vansa had stopped in, noting that the young Talanah “had the best of her mom’s looks already” and congratulating the both of them. When Ikrie had stepped away to grab Anukai some more water, the healer woman stepped closer to the bed, speaking softly.

“Everything… feeling okay?” she asked, her eyes flicking toward the redhead’s left arm.

Anukai’s lips drew into a thin line as she nodded.

“For now.”

Vansa stared down at her for a moment before offering a small smile, placing a hand on her right shoulder.

“Stop by any time you need.”

They both exchanged nods before the healer excused herself, stating that she couldn’t keep her appointments waiting too long, with a smirk, and making her exit.

The next visitor was one that Anukai had been expecting the whole time, but the reaction she displayed was far from what the redhead had anticipated. Immediately upon seeing the newborn, Ara had broken down in tears, a display that neither of the other women had seen before. To their even greater surprise, she hadn’t tried to pass it off, but had knelt down at the bedside opposite Ikrie, staring down at the small head of red hair.

“You did it,” the other redhead said softly. “You… she’s not like…  _ us _ .”

Anukai had quickly began to tear up, as well, prompting the other redhead to begin to rise to her feet, pressing a kiss to the side of the new mother’s head.

“Whatever… we are to each other,” Ara continued, “officially, or—”

“You’re family—her aunt,” Anukai interrupted, her voice somewhat raspy but firm. “No questions.”

The other redhead’s eyes began to water, once again, as she stared down at the newborn, who had begun to fuss, once again.

“I can do that.”

“You better.”

Ara let out a wet laugh, shaking her head as she wiped at her eyes with the back of one hand.

“I promise.”

Anukai smiled softly, reaching over to place one hand atop the other redhead’s and squeezing it gently.

“I believe you.”

The final visitors of the day, bringing with them the charge of another fussing one-month old who Ikrie quickly took, also brought with them the heaviest moment of silence with them as they entered. Anukai’s eyes locked with Aloy’s almost instantly as the older redhead paused by the doorway, her jaw set while the tremble in her lower lip gave away what really lay beneath her attempt at controlling her expression. The younger redhead nodded, gesturing for her to come closer, and Aloy slowly made her way around the bed.

“You’re looking good, kid,” she said softly.

“I’m fine,” Anukai replied, grinning. “Say hello.”

Aloy slowly came to a stop beside the head of the bed as she turned to the bundle of blankets in the younger redhead’s arms, only to freeze as one hand shot to cover her mouth, doing a poor job of hiding the sudden gasp that escaped her. The older redhead seemed to glance to Anukai for permission, before the younger woman nodded and she slowly began to reach forward, tugging down part of the bundle to see the newborn’s face more clearly.

“You can say hello,” Anukai said softly. “She’s got to get to know the voice of her grandmother.”

Aloy remained frozen in place for a moment, still staring down at the newborn for a moment or two before gently clearing her throat.

“H-her… her name… you… did you…?”

“I did,” Anukai confirmed, nodding. “We did. Talanah Sobeck.”

The older redhead finally seemed to crack fully, her face cracking in a broad smile, tears running down her cheeks, as she took a careful seat on the edge of the bed. A moment later, she wrapped one arm behind Anukai’s shoulders, squeezing her opposite shoulder as she reached toward the bundle of blankets, once again.

“Hi little Talanah,” the older redhead said softly. “I’m so happy to see you.”

“We going to have make this a competition, now?”

Anukai smirked as the older Talanah came to a stop at Aloy’s side, wrapping one arm over her shoulders as she stared down at the bundle, as well.

“Since she’s a Sobeck, figured we’d pay tribute to her other grandmother somehow,” the younger redhead said. “Ara… had an idea for a nickname, though.”

“Oh?”

“Lani.”

The Carja woman’s face cracked into a broad smile as she leaned her head on Aloy’s shoulder.

“My mother used to call me that when I was a child,” she sighed. “I approve.”

“Oh, I’m glad we got the final word,” Aloy shot back, rolling her eyes.

“Hey, if we’re going to share a name, I have to make sure she’s got nothing but the best for everything,” the Carja woman quipped, although Anukai noted the unmistakable redness that had begun to cloud her eyes.

The older redhead glanced over at the raven-haired woman beside her, grinning as she reached to gently pat the hand on her shoulder. Anukai happened to glance past the two elder women beside her to find Ikrie standing a few feet away, the bundle of blankets that held Kal securely in her arms while a broad grin continued to light up her face. A few moments later, Talanah happened to glance over before clearing her throat and wiping at her eyes with the back of one hand.

“How’s my little man doing, too?”

Anukai noted how Aloy seemed to pause for a moment, something unreadable crossing through her eyes before she shook it off, glancing after Talanah, as well. The Carja woman came to a stop beside Ikrie, staring down at the bundle and grinning.

“Quietest he’s been in hours,” she muttered.

“He missed his mothers,” Ikrie shrugged.

Still continuing to rock and shake the infant boy, she made her way over to the bedside, Aloy moving so she could slide in next to Anukai.

“Look, Kallik,” the dark-haired woman said, tilting him slightly toward the redhead and her new charge. “Say hi to your sister.”

The little boy’s eyes were closed, but he seemed to shift and stir slightly, although Anukai wasn’t sure if it was just from the motion or not. Still, she couldn’t help but smirk as she glanced up at Ikrie.

“They’ve got some time to work on it,” she quipped.

The dark-haired woman laughed, adjusting the bundle, once again so that he was held more normally.

The Palace healers checked on both Lani and Anukai once again shortly after, noting that both seemed to be fine, but advising that they would recommend at least staying through the night, for safety. Despite the redhead’s initial protests, Ikrie convinced her to heed their advice, citing her own personal experience from just the month or so prior. Finally, Anukai had sighed, rolling her eyes but agreeing with them, prompting the dark-haired woman to make a similar gesture before placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

“It won’t kill you,” she said softly. “Actually, it’ll do the opposite.”

“I already said I would,” the redhead shot back, smirking.

“Yes, but I can tell that’s now what you were thinking.”

“When did you learn to read minds?”

“I learned how to read yours long ago,” Ikrie shot back, smirking.

“Think you can teach me?”

“A girl is allowed to keep some secrets,” the dark-haired woman shot back, winking and prompting the redhead to roll her eyes, once again.

As the healers left, Anukai sighed, glancing down at the tiny girl still against her chest.

“You’ll get to see home soon enough,” she whispered.

The small redhead squirmed slightly at the sound of her voice, but otherwise remained quiet. Ikrie had adamantly defended that she would stay the whole night with Anukai and Lani, leaving the other two to work out shifts to stay with them through the night. Talanah had volunteered first, despite Aloy’s protests, citing that it was easier for her to stay awake now than to try to sleep and wake up again later.

Before the elder redhead left, however, they all shared a simple dinner of food they had brought from their apartment, Talanah insisting that her cooking was better than what the infirmary had to offer. Anukai didn’t complain, regardless, and soon after eating, found her eyelids drooping. Aloy bid her goodnight and that she would be back in the middle of the night, so she would see her when she woke; the younger redhead barely had enough energy to mumble a goodnight and watch her leave before she felt herself slip into unconsciousness.

She couldn’t remember any particular dreams that floated past her, but she was aware of a vague impression of warm colors and sensations, particularly that of red and blue.

Eventually, she found herself awoken by the sound of a newborn’s cries and she blinked rapidly, attempting to focus her vision in the near-darkness of the infirmary room. Glancing down, she found Lani crying and pulling at the fabric of her top, prompting Anukai to smirk.

“Okay, okay, I hear you…”

Once the girl was fed, she fell silent and still, once again, although sleep now seemed to elude Anukai. Regardless, she attempted to lean her head back on the pillow and close her eyes, but it was of little use. With a sigh, she rolled her head to the side, her eyes opening, once again, to find the image of Ikrie asleep on the opposite bed before her. A smile began to tug at her lips as she watched the dark-haired woman, her now-longer hair mostly covering her face from when she had clearly rolled over at some point, finally able to sleep. Anukai didn’t even want to begin imagining what their lives would be like with two infants, now, but she was determined to match Ikrie’s resolve, as she had taken the brunt of caring for Kal in the last month, while the redhead had been unable to help as much as she wished.

The dark-haired woman would never admit it, but Anukai had seen the dark bags under her eyes and noted the slouch in her posture that came with the lack of sleep and energy she had carried with her, but she had also noted how all of that had evaporated over the course of the previous day.

The redhead’s eyes finally broke away from her mate to search the rest of the room, quickly finding the second figure seated across from the end of Ikrie’s bed, Talanah holding Kal securely in her arms. The raven-haired woman was staring down at the small boy, a grin fixed on her features, before she seemed to sense Anukai’s gaze and lifted her head toward her.

“Get some sleep,” the Carja whispered.

“Can’t,” Anukai mumbled.

Talanah laughed softly, rising from her seat and making her way to the redhead’s bedside, shifting the small boy to the crook of her right arm as she worked her left with a grimace, rotating her shoulder and stretching her arm above her head for a moment.

“You okay?” Anukai asked, lifting her head from the pillow.

“I’m fine,” Talanah insisted, grinning as she glanced down at her. “I should be asking you that.”

The redhead sighed, letting her head fall back against the soft surface beneath her.

“Thank you,” she said softly.

“Of course,” the Carja scoffed. “Anything for you two.”

Anukai grinned softly for a moment before clearing her throat.

“You’re… you’re not mad that we named her… named her after you?”

Talanah shook her head, her grin broadening.

“I’m honored, Anukai,” she said. “I don’t feel I deserve it.”

“You do… both of you do…”

The Carja woman gently took a seat on the edge of the bed, prompting Anukai to shift herself slightly to look up at her.

“You—both of you—give us so much more than you give yourselves credit for,” Talanah said softly. “Now you’ve got your own generation to take care of and pass on the best of yourselves… and I hope it brings you just as much, and that you cherish that.”

Anukai smiled softly, glancing down at the shape of Lani against her chest, the newborn shifting and squirming slightly.

“I already do.”

The new mother didn’t notice she had dozed off, once again, until she found herself blinking awake to the sound of the infirmary door opening. When she glanced toward it, she found Aloy carefully slipped inside, closing the door as softly as she could behind her before glancing toward the younger redhead and offering her a smile. Before approaching, however, she made her way over to Talanah, who had evidently fallen asleep in the chair at the foot of Ikrie’s bed.

The older redhead awoke her with a soft kiss to the forehead, whispering something in her ear that prompted Talanah to grumble something that sounded like “yeah, yeah” before she ultimately rose to her feet, stretching stiffly. When she saw Anukai was awake, as well, she slipped over to her, running one hand over her hair and brushing some of the stray strands out of her face.

“Get some sleep,” the Carja whispered.

“You, too,” Anukai mumbled.

Talanah grinned before placing a soft kiss to the crown of her head and turning to make her exit.

“I’ll help make sure everyone gets home,” she said to Aloy as she passed her. “Just call me.”

The older redhead sighed, rolling her eyes.

“Sleep, Tal.”

The Carja woman grinned, placing a quick kiss on her before turning to leave, also taking care to close the door as softly as possible behind her. Once she had left, the older redhead sighed, turning back to Anukai and approaching her.

“How’s it going, kid?” she asked.

“Tired,” Anukai shrugged.

“Can’t sleep?”

The younger redhead shook her head, prompting Aloy to grin, taking a seat on the edge of the bed and running one hand over her hair, continuing to smooth more of the strands away from her forehead.

“I couldn’t, either,” she said softly.

Anukai smiled softly, even as her eyelids involuntarily began to close, the soothing sensation of Aloy’s motions sending a wave of fatigue over her that rivaled the best sleeping medication the healers had available.

“She’s okay,” the younger redhead mumbled.

“I know,” Aloy laughed softly. “I wasn’t worried, just… excited, too.”

Anukai blinked slowly, the tiredness clearing for a moment as she cleared her throat.

“Want to hold her?”

Aloy’s motions instantly froze and the younger redhead’s smile began to turn into a frown.

“Sorry, I—”

“No, no need to be sorry,” Aloy interrupted. “If… if you want…”

“Do  _ you _ want to?”

The older redhead’s lower lip notably trembled for a moment before she nodded, visibly clenching her jaw. Anukai carefully collected Lani in the bundle of blankets, wrapping her securely before Aloy carefully lifted her free. The immediate lack of warmth and weight against her sent something strange shooting through the younger redhead’s chest, but as she watched the older redhead gingerly take the newborn in her arms, it melted away, a smile overtaking her features, once again.

Aloy rocked the swaddled child for a moment before gently reaching toward her, running the back of two fingers along the side of her face.

“H-hey there, kiddo…”

Anukai paused for a moment, staring up at the older redhead beside her with a contemplative expression for a moment before she felt a completely different pang shoot through her chest, a smaller, sadder smile tugging at her lips.

“Waited a long time to see you,” the older redhead continued. “Was worth it, though… look at you…”

Finally, she tore her eyes from the newborn, glancing down at Anukai as the younger redhead noted how wet her eyes had grown, the first tears just beginning to roll down her cheeks.

“She’s beautiful,” she whispered. “I’m… I’m so… so happy, Anukai… for you, and… and…”

“Seek life,” Anukai replied, just as softly.

The older redhead froze for a moment before a soft sob escaped her, her eyes squeezing shut for a moment as she nodded.

“You did, kiddo… you did.”

\----------------------------------------

Soon after leaving the infirmary at the Palace, Ara found herself wandering aimlessly through the streets of Meridian, her mind and feet seemingly disconnected from each other. A strange, intense feeling pressed at the inside of her ribs and she had been trying to figure out exactly what it meant for the past several minutes, but every time her mind settled on something, it slipped away, once again. Each time, though, the image of the tiny redhead slid back into place, and her grin renewed.

“ _ You’re family—her aunt. No questions _ .”

She had to keep it in her mind. Each time, some part of her tried to reject it, tell her that it couldn’t be true.

But Anukai had said it.

She had been so sure.

“ _ I promise. _ ”

“ _ I believe you. _ ”

The sound of her own laughter reached her ears as Ara ran her hands over her hair, once again, before leaving them clasped behind her head. A group of young women in Carja silks glanced at her warily before moving another foot or two away from her as they passed, but Ara barely paid them any mind.

“ _ You’re family—her aunt. No questions. _ ”

She had so many but… none of them seemed to matter, right then.

Suddenly, her feet came to a stop and she blinked, glancing around at where they had brought her. Eventually, her eyes settled on a wrought iron sign hanging over the doorway beside her and something strange passed through her chest.

“I made a promise… I… I deserve a reward,” she muttered, nodding slowly before turning to the door and pulling it open.

Immediately, the sounds of the busy pub enveloped her as she slid into the crowd, making her way through the patrons already in various states of sobriety. When she finally reached the wooden counter at the far end, she came to a stop against it, wedging her way between an older man with a large beard and a well-built woman in Oseram Sparkworker clothing. Both of them spared her nothing more than a passing glance before returning to their conversations. When the barkeep approached, she waved him down and ordered a tall pour of her favorite Carja dark liquor.

As soon as the tall, blonde man slid her the glass, she slammed her shards down on the counter and downed the entire pour in one motion. Both the barkeep and the Oseram woman beside her seemed to recoil in surprise, but Ara didn’t react, simply letting out a heavy sigh and sliding the glass back across the counter.

“Another… please.”

The barkeep laughed, but lifted the bottle he had barely had time to place back on the shelf behind him and poured another.

“Rough night?” he asked, raising one eyebrow.

“No… really great night,” Ara said, her voice fading into laughter.

“Ah, so these are celebratory?”

“Most definitely. I’m drinking for two, so…”

The man paused as she noted how the Oseram woman had grown tense, as well.

“No, no,” Ara said quickly, clearing her throat, “I’m not… my—sister—just gave birth to a daughter tonight… swear it.”

The barkeep nodded, finishing the pour of the drink, but seemingly eying her a little more warily. Swallowing heavily, Ara slid her shards across the counter, including a few extra this time, before taking the second pour and only drinking half of it in one go, this time.

“Congratulations,” the Oseram woman suddenly chimed in, prompting Ara to glance over at her. “First child, I take it?”

Ara nodded.

“First, and… I-I’m so proud of her,” she muttered, already feeling her face growing warm as she swirled the remaining contents of her glass. “She’s so beautiful… the child, not… I mean, of course my s-sister is, I mean… we’re—twins—but—”

“I get it,” the Oseram woman laughed. “What’s her name?”

“Talanah,” Ara said, grinning. “I call her Lani, though.”

The dark-haired woman raised her mug toward Ara, prompting the redhead to lift her glass, clinking the two of them together.

“To Lani,” the other woman said. “May the fire of the forge remain in her for years to come.”

Ara’s grin widened as she nodded.

“To Lani.”

With that, they both drank, Ara finishing the rest of hers while the Oseram’s still seemed to contain liquid in her mug as she put it back down. The other woman returned to her conversation with the man on the other side of her, while Ara waved down the barkeep, once again. When he returned, he wore the same raised-eyebrow expression.

“Another?” he asked.

Ara nodded.

“I’ve got shards…”

The blonde man glanced to the Oseram woman beside her and Ara caught her nod out of the corner of her eye. He poured her another tall glass of the dark liquor, but as he pushed the glass toward her, once again, he grinned.

“This one’s on me,” he said. “You said your niece was born tonight? Consider it congratulatory.”

Ara mumbled a thanks, but still slid a few shards across the counter for him. The barkeep poured his own, much smaller pour of the liquor a moment later and they clinked their glasses together before the redhead drank half of hers, once again. As the barkeep took the shards and moved on to the next waiting patron, Ara remained staring down at the liquid in her glass, slowly turning the vessel in her fingers as her vision blurred somewhat.

The warmth from her throat and stomach had quickly begun to spread to the rest of her, but she couldn’t tell how much of it was from the liquor, directly, and how much of it was natural as a heavy feeling sank over her. It wasn’t the same heavy feeling she was used to when memories of the past paraded through her mind, however, but more like a warm blanket, or a set of arms wrapping around her in—

She quickly downed the rest of her drink, shivering slightly at the burning sensation that followed it down, but her thoughts quickly returned to the tiny redhead and her mother back at the infirmary and her grin grew, once again.

After ordering another pour, she held the glass before her, blinking slowly as she realized that the three previous ones had secretly taken effect while she hadn’t been paying attention. She was acutely aware of every motion of her body, as she felt as if she were in constant motion, a heaviness settling into her limbs.

Along with the looseness of her body, her mind began to wander, once again. This time, however, every time one of the dark thoughts attempted to pull her down with it, images of red and feelings of warmth pushed them away.

“ _ You’re family—her aunt. No questions _ .”

“ _ I promise. _ ”

“ _ I believe you. _ ”

A few moments later, Ara realized that her drink was empty and resting on the counter, and she could see the lights of her Focus interface about her, along with a box of glyphs that seemed to be changing as she stared at them. Before she could really question what was going on, she heard a voice in her ear, just barely audible over the sounds of the pub around her.

“Ara? Why are you calling and—where the hell are you?”

“I-I…” the redhead stammered, swallowing heavily before taking a deep breath. “I wanna talk—jus’ hang and… catch up, y’know?”

“You? Really?”

“Jus’… you know ‘em and… and I… jus’… please…”

A moment of silence followed before a heavy sigh sounded in her ear.

“Fine. This’ll be interesting… where are you?”

Ara gave the name of the pub and a vague location before the call ended and she tapped her Focus, once again. She caught the barkeep’s eye, once again, and he approached, raising an eyebrow.

“You do this often?” he asked as he approached.

“Used to…” the redhead muttered.

“Maybe take it easy for a minute,” he said. “I’ll get you some water.”

Ara opened her mouth to argue, but he had already turned to grab a wooden pitcher from the far end of the bar, pouring it into a mug before returning to place it before her.

“Have at least one of these, and then we can talk about ordering another,” he said, smirking.

Ara mimicked his expression as she nodded, pulling the mug closer and taking a long swig of the lukewarm liquid. As he walked away, the redhead began to slide the wooden vessel back and forth between her hands on the bar as she stared down at it absentmindedly.

“C’mon, work ya magic…”

Vansa paused below the wrought iron sign hanging over the front door to the pub, taking a deep breath as she fidgeted with the ends of the sleeves to her brown jacket. Sounds from inside the building were still clearly audible outside, but the front windows had just enough of a coating that the images within were distorted, hiding the true images of whatever debauchery was contained inside.

Despite the filter, she could just make out a splash of red and felt a tight feeling quickly appear in her chest.

“Let’s see what kind of shit show is on display tonight,” the healer woman muttered before pulling open the front door and stepping inside.

Despite the sudden wave of sound and the flurry of motion all throughout the pub, Vansa’s eyes quickly locked on a singular redhead at the main bar. At the sight of Ara leaning against the wooden surface, laughing and swirling a wooden mug in her hand, the healer woman paused, part of her suddenly wondering if it had been a poor decision to come to the bar, while another told her it would be prime fodder to hold over her, once again.

Yet another, however, told her to stay for an entirely different reason.

With a heavy sigh, she made her way through the crowd until she reached the bar, sliding into place beside the redhead as the two young Carja men beside her vacated at the intense glare from the healer woman. Smirking, Vansa leaned forward against the bar, glancing over at the redhead who didn’t seem to have noticed her, yet.

“So, been a while since I’ve gotten a drunk call. Was starting to wonder if I was dreaming.”

Ara jumped at the sound of her voice, glancing over before a broad grin spread across her features, the expression genuine even if her eyes had the telltale glassiness of drunkenness.

“You came,” she said, laughing loudly.

“Said I would,” Vansa shrugged. “Everything okay? I’d think I’m the last person you’d want to call.”

“I… everything’s amazing,” Ara sighed, “and, I know, but…”

The redhead trailed off, her grin growing more sheepish as her face flushed redder than it was already. A moment later, she cleared her throat, turning back to the barkeep and waving him over.

“One for me and her,” she said, nodding to Vansa.

The blonde man raised one eyebrow, glancing toward the healer woman who grinned and shrugged.

“Sure.”

He returned it with a similar gesture and grabbed another glass, pouring Ara’s tall and leaving Vansa’s normal before sliding the glass to her. The healer woman took it, sniffing the contents before blinking at the strength of the scent.

“You always did have an affinity for the strong shit,” she said, laughing as she took a sip at the liquor.

“What canna say? I gotta type.”

Vansa paused for a moment before sighing heavily and shaking her head.

“So is that why you asked me to come here?” she asked. “To lay terrible lines like that on me?”

“No, actually,” Ara replied, taking a sip from her drink. “I… ‘cause of… Anukai and… and Lani.”

The healer woman paused, raising her eyebrows at the redhead.

“What about them?”

“You… you seen ‘em, Van?” Ara asked, her face quickly lighting up, once again.

“I went to visit, yeah,” she replied, nodding.

“Me, too, an’… an’… I still can’t believe it.”

“Believe what?”

“That Lani… exists!” Ara replied, waving her glass precariously before her. “She’s… she’s  _ real _ !”

“I’d certainly hope so,” Vansa quipped, smirking, “otherwise we’re both crazy.”

The redhead let out an exaggerated laugh in mocking before taking another sip of her drink.

“Not what I meant,” she said once she had swallowed the liquor. “She’s… fuck, Van, you know… y’know… me, an’…”

Both of them fell silent as Vansa’s smirk began to fade, memories she had long ago locked away in her own head attempting to resurface, once again.

“Yeah, I do,” she said quickly, taking a sip of her own drink.

“An’ so… to… t’see her…” Ara continued, her voice shaking slightly. “I jus’…”

The redhead took a sip from her drink, once again, hanging her head for a moment before taking a deep breath and looking over at Vansa, the healer woman noting how her eyes had begun to grow red and watery.

“I’m so  _ happy _ , Van,” she said. “She’s—she’s perfect and—and beautiful and—and when I saw her I… fuck, I’m doin’ it again…”

The redhead wiped at her eyes forcefully with the back of her hand as Vansa remained silent, a small smile beginning to tug at her lips.

“Sh—she—‘Nukai—asked me—nah,  _ told _ me—I’m her f-family… ‘er Aunt… Aunt Ara…”

The redhead shivered intensely, but the smile on her face had returned in full force.

“I can’t believe it… but…  _ she _ believes in  _ me _ …”

The healer woman remained silent for several moments before she took a deep breath.

“She’s not the only one.”

Ara turned toward her, grin still plastered across her face and the hints of tears still staining her cheeks. In that moment, something tense and almost painful tugged at Vansa’s chest and she took a sip from her drink, glancing away from the redhead’s gaze for a moment.

“I told you family looked good on you…”

Another few moments of silence passed before Ara cleared her throat.

“Thank you.”

Vansa’s face contorted in confusion as she glanced up at her.

“For what?”

“For what you gave me,” Ara said softly.

When Vansa’s expression hadn’t changed from confusion after another moment or two, the redhead swallowed heavily.

“A chance… t’learn, t’… find…”

The redhead trailed off as her tone grew much more constricted and she turned back to her drink, her shoulders beginning to shake with what seemed to be sobs.

“I tried t’learn, an’… I hope… hope you… fuck…”

Ara quickly downed a significant portion of the rest of her drink, refusing to meet Vansa’s gaze as the healer woman stared back at her. As she had spoken, the dark-haired woman found the same tense, painful feeling in her chest growing stronger until finally something in her seemed to break, and felt the first hints of something burning at her own eyes. She took a sip from her own glass, only to find it shaking under the grip of her hand. As she lowered it back to the counter, her free hand suddenly began to lift, pausing inches above Ara’s back before finally closing the gap, coming to rest just between her shoulder blades.

The redhead startled slightly, but kept her gaze focused on the glass in her hands. Vansa’s hand slowly began to run back and forth across her shoulders, the motion firm but not forceful.

“I am,” she said softly, finally prompting Ara to look over at her once again, “and you have. I can see it in you.”

As their eyes met, Vansa felt as if she were finally seeing something past the guard the redhead had put up for so many years. She was seeing past the joking, almost reckless outward demeanor, past the hardened wall built around a time that needed to be contained as much as protected, and into something much deeper.

In that moment, she saw what she had always pushed for in the redhead.

What she had always known could be there.

Even if Ara had never shown it.

A moment later, the redhead had stepped forward, wrapping her arms tightly around Vansa. The healer woman paused for only a moment before returning the embrace equally as tightly. She could feel Ara’s face buried in her shoulder as the redhead’s grip only seemed to tighten further. The dark-haired woman’s eyes slid closed for a moment as she leaned her head forward, her chin coming to rest on the redhead’s shoulder as she felt the first of her own tears begin to slide down her cheeks.

Both of them remained locked in the embrace for what felt like several minutes before they slowly began to break apart. Even then, they remained holding each other by their upper arms a foot or so away from each other, their eyes locking while they both remained silent. Finally, they both broke into laughter, shaking their heads.

As they settled, Vansa found one hand raising from Ara’s shoulder, her thumb gently wiping away the wet trails on the redhead’s cheeks.

“I did always hate to see you cry,” she quipped, smirking.

Ara laughed, once again, squeezing her upper arms for a moment.

“This one… feels good,” she said softly.

Vansa smiled back at her, nodding as her hand came to rest on the redhead’s shoulder, massaging at it for a moment.

“I know… I know…”


	11. Awaited

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by imagine0314

_I waited so long to meet you._

Aloy sits, perched on the edge of the younger redhead’s bed. She hasn’t been able to sleep all night despite knowing she has second watch over the girls. Instead, she had laid in bed, buzzing with excitement, unable to calm herself, a thousand thoughts swirling in her head. A thousand more if she counted them _both._

She is here. She is _finally_ here.

The room is dim, the air heavy and calm. She hears the soft sounds of Ikrie and Kal sleeping on the other side of the room and grins, the space filled with four pieces of her heart outside her body, each one _safe_ and content. 

“Can’t sleep?” she asks Anukai, already knowing the answer. 

Aloy knows she’s never seen Anukai happier--or more exhausted. The tiny bundle in her arms is pressed close to the younger woman’s skin. Lani doesn’t move but for the up and down of her chest, seemingly pleased with her first night of sleep on Earth. At least one of them is rested.

The younger redhead shakes her head.  
  
“I couldn’t, either,” the older woman admits.  
  
_I waited so long to meet you._

Aloy reaches out, fingers gently beginning to card through Anukai’s hair--a gesture that would have been unthinkable eight years ago now comes as easily as breathing. This is how they are, now. Together. Connected. The younger woman had referred to her as _Grandmother_ hours earlier and she can still feel the warmth overflowing in her chest. 

The motion of her fingertips through the girl’s fiery mane is slow and repetitive, and she can feel Anukai’s body soften and grow languid, her eyes blinking heavily. She wants to sleep, Aloy can tell, but the younger woman doesn’t allow herself to succumb to its grasp.

“She’s okay,” Anukai mumbles, trying to reassure her.  
  
“I know,” Aloy chuckles to herself. “I wasn’t up because I was worried. Just...excited, is all.”

A small smile passes Anukai’s lips. 

“You want to hold her?”

The older woman stiffens. She wants to. Goddess, she wants to. They _both_ want to. How does she even begin to express how much she wants this?

 _I waited so long to meet you._ _  
_ _  
_ “Sorry, I--” Anukai begins.  
  
“No, no need to be sorry.”

“Do you _want_ to?”  
  
Aloy desperately wants to say _yes_ but instead the word gets caught in her throat, a lump already forming as her lower lip trembles. She knows Anukai can see it, see what it means to her, and so she simply nods, her jaw clenched but her eyes glassy already.

Anukai slowly adjusts the bundle in her arms and gently hands the newborn to the older woman, Aloy’s strong and sure hands lifting her free of her mother’s grasp. Anukai’s eyes trace every movement, instantly watchful and protective the moment the girl leaves her arms. 

As soon as the little one’s warm weight settles into her embrace, everything changes. She feels a swell behind her ribs, the warmth from earlier threatening to spill out through every pore.  
  
The older woman gently rocks the newborn in the crook of her left arm, before reaching out and softly running the back of two fingers along the side of the girl’s tiny, sleeping face. Lani moves ever so slightly at the touch, appearing comforted by it and the older redhead feels a jolt run through her very core.

 _I waited so long to meet you._  
  
“H-hey there, kiddo,” she says, the words bubbling up from inside her before she can think twice. It doesn’t matter now, there’s a perfect alignment between them. She’s not sure they’ve ever felt something so strongly in unison as she does in this moment.

She can feel Anukai’s eyes on her, feels the pause that tells her the younger woman _knows_ she’s allowed the other half of herself to take the reins, though neither says it out loud. Both halves of the older woman are just grateful for the chance to be here. Grateful that Anukai _knows_ and allows it. The two parts of her are _family_. 

“Waited a long time to see you. Worth it, though...look at you,” Elisabet utters to the tiny girl reverently. 

She’s been waiting, waiting so long for this moment. And somehow she knows, deep down, that it’s been far longer than the months she spent watching Lani grow within her adoptive daughter. 

She’s been waiting a _millennia_.

For too long she’s been reborn again and again and again. Elisabet Sobeck, the woman doomed to a never ending cycle of repetition, seeing her own face, her own body remade over and over, cursed to steward the Earth forever in undying repeat.

Aloy. 

Anukai. 

Ara. 

Ashana. 

It’s not their fault--none of them. And it hasn’t ever stopped her from loving each one, in turn, as if they were her own. Family, or something like it. But she’d be lying if she said she hadn’t felt the stagnant stretch of her own strange existence, unable to move on, her essence captured in each reinstantiation, unable to grow or change. 

It’s the opposite of what she’d tried to do. The opposite of what she died for.

 _I waited so long to meet you_.

She can feel her eyes getting misty, tears beginning to roll down her cheeks. Which of them belong to her, and which to Aloy, she’ll never know. She doesn’t care to know. The veil between them is so thin, now.

This is what she’s been waiting for, a Sobeck to break the cycle.

Lani is new and wonderful and _different_ , her hair auburn rather than bright red, her eyes, when she peeks them open for a fleeting second, a gray-hazel instead of green-gold. She’s _not the same_ , she’s _not her_ and Elisabet can’t help but sob in love and relief at the thought.

She swallows heavily, considering that Lani is not condemned to continue their legacy of blood and sacrifice. The first Sobeck in a thousand years, free of _her_ past.

“She’s beautiful,” Elisabet whispers, choking on her words. “I’m...I’m so happy, Anukai, for you and...and…”

Anukai places a hand on hers, the one still stroking softly at Lani’s face. Elisabet’s breath hitches; Anukai _sees_ her. Knows she’s here, at the forefront. Knows she’s the one holding Lani, holding her _granddaughter,_ and all at once, she understands.

The title wasn’t just for Aloy. It was for them both.

 _I waited so long to meet you_.

“Seek life,” the younger redhead breathes. 

It’s something quiet. Something meant just for them. Fresh tears spill down Elisabet’s face and when she meets Anukai’s eyes, she finds the love in her expression hasn’t changed, hasn’t wavered with the knowledge of who she’s speaking to.

“You did, kiddo...you did.”


	12. Watercolors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

The sound of a gentle rustling immediately told Anukai she was still asleep before she had even opened her eyes. Nothing in her bedroom made that sound, and it was too loud and constant to be the sheets, even if Ikrie had been constantly thrashing about in them. A moment later, the redhead took a deep breath in through her nose, noting the heavy, earthy scent that came with it, and opened her eyes.

Almost immediately, her vision was filled with a brilliant swath of oranges, golds, pinks, and reds, with a singular, brilliant spot in the center of it all, prompting her to squint and raise her hand over her eyes defensively. When she had turned away from the light, she blinked rapidly, letting her vision re-adjust until she could make out the trees around her.

The grass at her feet swayed in the soft, cool breeze that blew across the apparent hilltop where she stood, while the leaves and branches overhead confirmed what the rustling was.

Eventually, Anukai’s gaze focused on the silhouette of a figure seated several yards away, in a small gap between the trees that overlooked the downward slope of the hill, and she began to approach. As the specific features of the figure began to become clear, she found a small smile tugging at her lips.

Wordlessly, she sat beside the older redhead, drawing her knees in closer to her before bracing her elbows atop them, clasping her left wrist with her right hand. She had long ago gotten used to the reality of feeling skin and muscle on her left arm in this place, but she couldn’t pretend that it didn’t bring a small pang of sadness to her chest each time.

“I remember sitting right here,” Elisabet said softly, still staring out at the scene before them, “for the first time and thinking… ‘I’ll never see something as beautiful as this.’”

Anukai’s gaze swept over the small valley before them, noting how the setting sun reflected off the small lake down the hillside and to their right, the light bright even from this distance, while the green-coated ground continued toward the distant, rocky peaks, the grass and trees only giving way near the very top.

“It’s like a painting,” the older woman continued, “but… I can visit it, any time, now…”

Anukai nodded slowly, drawing in a deep breath of the cool, mountain air.

It felt familiar, but she wasn’t sure from where, exactly.

“But… all of this beauty, I… I think it comes in second place, now.”

The younger woman finally turned toward her companion, raising her eyebrows as Elisabet hung her head, staring down at her knees for a moment.

“The moment I… I saw you and Lani…”

Anukai’s lips pulled into a small smile as she unclasped her hand from about her wrist, reaching to gently rub the center of her back.

“I could tell,” she said softly.

Elisabet let out a wet laugh, rubbing at the back of her eyes with one hand before glancing over at the younger woman, a smile tugging at her lips even as tears continued to roll down her cheeks.

“You knew it was me, then?”

“Of course,” Anukai replied, nodding, rubbing her back with more pressure for a moment. “I always know when it’s you.”

Elisabet laughed, shaking her head for a moment as the younger woman smirked.

“Guess even after all these years… still not as good at hiding it as I thought…”

“Or I’m just very good at spotting it,” Anukai shot back. “I… do know Aloy pretty well… and at first maybe it was just… any time it clearly wasn’t  _ all _ her… but eventually I… picked up on what was distinctly  _ you _ .”

Elisabet looked impressed as the younger woman laughed.

“Your secret’s safe with me.”

The older redhead joined her in laughter for a moment or two until they both fell silent. Slowly, Elisabet raised one arm to slide it behind Anukai’s back, wrapping it around her shoulders. They both remained in the same positions for several long moments until finally Anukai shifted herself, sliding lower so that she could lean her head on Elisabet’s shoulder. The older woman’s hand slowly reached up from her shoulder to run her hand over Anukai’s hair, the fiery mane still tied back in a braid, even on the hillside, in their space.

“I’m so proud of you, kiddo,” she whispered.

Anukai hummed a response that almost seemed like a question, prompting her to continue.

“You did what… what it seemed like the Sobeck line was never going to be able to do…”

“Not impossible,” the younger woman muttered, “not incapable…”

“Just not enough time to try.”

Anukai sighed heavily, more of her weight sinking into Elisabet before the older redhead grinned and released her arm from around her for a moment, shifting her position so she sat cross-legged behind her and gently guiding the younger woman so that she lay with her head more or less against the older woman’s chest.

The two of them remained silent as they stared out at the scenery, once again, Elisabet’s hands instinctually reaching to run over Anukai’s hair. She could feel the younger woman relaxing further and further as they sat, and a warm feeling began to spread through the older redhead’s chest, quickly settling into the rest of her limbs until she finally leaned forward, placing a gentle kiss to the crown of her head. Anukai shifted slightly at the gesture, but otherwise remained still and silent.

After another long minute or two, she finally cleared her throat, bringing Elisabet’s gaze down to her, once again.

“Where is this place?”

The older woman grinned, glancing back up at the scenery.

“I think it was in… Colorado,” she said slowly. “Could be somewhere in the Sierra Nevadas, though… Carson Range.”

“So this was… I could have seen this, myself?”

Elisabet’s lips pulled into a thin line for a moment before she cleared her throat.

“Maybe,” she sighed. “The world changed a lot once GAIA took a shot at it.”

Anukai nodded, muttering a soft “huh” as she shifted her position against Elisabet, once again.

“She did a good job, though…”

The older woman smirked, nodding.

“That she did…”

Another moment or two of silence passed before Elisabet broke it.

“She’s proud of you, too, I’m sure.”

“GAIA?”

Elisabet hummed a response in the affirmative.

“I… we have to thank her… for Ikrie, and… well, for a lot, but…”

“She’ll say that no thanks is needed,” the older woman interjected, “but give it to her anyway.”

Anukai laughed softly, nodding.

“Can do.”

The comfortable silence hung over them for another long minute or two before Anukai tilted her head back, prompting Elisabet to glance down at her, meeting the near-identical gold-green gaze staring back at her.

“You can see her any time,” the younger woman said.

Elisabet raised her eyebrows as Anukai grinned.

“Just work it out with Aloy, maybe.”

They both laughed as the older woman nodded slowly.

“We can figure it out…’

“I… I just wanted you to know that… that you’re not… not excluded from all of this,” she continued softly. “This… isn’t normal, I know, but…”

“It’s okay, kiddo,” Elisabet sighed. “I’ve been working with not normal for a long time, now.”

Anukai grinned as the older woman wrapped both arms around her, tugging the younger woman more securely into her chest as she reached up to place one hand on her forearm, squeezing it gently, as well.

“I don’t want to keep you too long,” Elisabet whispered.

She felt the younger woman’s grip falter slightly and she inhaled slowly.

“You know where to find me, though.”

Anukai nodded as Elisabet squeezed her tightly, once again, burying her face in the fiery hair before her for a moment and closing her eyes. The younger woman’s slid closed, as well, the warm feeling from the embrace spreading throughout her, even as the grip about her chest burned the strongest.

A moment later, her eyes fluttered open to find the dark bedroom, once again, but the warm grip remained. She slowly turned her head to her right, finding a head of dark hair pressed against her shoulder, and she grinned, settling into Ikrie’s grip more securely as her eyes drifted closed, again.


	13. Seeds in Red

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

The exit from the Palace infirmary had been quite the production, between the healers trying to actually make sure all medical checks had been completed and the excitable but often in-the-way family members filling the room, many of them reluctant to relinquish their turn to hold the precious bundle, if even for a few moments. Once the visibly beleaguered healer gave her final judgement that the tiny redhead and her mother were healthy and well enough to return home, the excitement only seemed to escalate, again.

Anukai, herself, had been happy that she was finally able to get up and move about now that the initial soreness, aches, and pains had faded, although Ikrie and Aloy notably still seemed to hover close by as she held Lani, wrapped securely in a white blanket, to her chest, stroking her hand slowly over the newborn’s back. Once Talanah had made sure the final information was logged with the healer, and the exhausted woman bid them goodbye, the group began to make their way out of the Palace.

When they reached the bridge to the city, Anukai caught Bekan with the group of Vanguardsman at the far end, his eyes quickly locking onto her as he swallowed heavily. When they approached, he offered a smile, stepping forward from the others.

“Given the okay to go home, I see?” he said.

The redhead nodded, glancing down at the small charge at her chest before turning back to him, a grin tugging at her lips.

“She’s hearty,” she replied.

“Takes after her mother,” Bekan laughed as the new mother came to a stop before him, turning so that he could just see the newborn’s face. “In more ways than one, I see.”

They both laughed before falling silent for a moment or two, Bekan tapping his fingers against the side of his leg, until he finally cleared his throat.

“Well, if… uh… if you need any—help, or—anything—let me know… as always.”

Anukai’s small smile remained as she nodded.

“Thank you.”

Bekan offered one, in response, before glancing to her left.

“How’s the other charge doing?”

“He’s good,” Ikrie chimed in, nodding. “Wish he’d sleep through more of the night, though.”

“Ah, I… don’t envy you.”

The three of them laughed before the couple finally bid the Vanguardsman goodbye and moved to follow their older companions farther into the city. Aloy and Talanah notably made a path through the crowded streets that allowed the younger women and their precious cargo to more easily navigate them. The walk to Anukai and Ikrie’s apartment took longer than both of them were used to, but soon enough they were finally turning onto their street.

The redhead was busy attempting to gently rock the small bundle in her arms as the newborn had begun to stir and fuss amidst the noise of the busy Meridian streets. Even though her gaze was focused downward, she caught sight of the older women slowing to a stop, but she noted that they were not yet at the front door. Her face creasing in confusion, Anukai lifted her head to ask them what had happened, when her eyes caught sight of what had undoubtedly caused their abrupt halt.

The new mother’s near-mirror image was just rising to her feet, wiping at the dust on her back before turning to face the group. Anukai’s gaze took in the familiar sleeve of dark tattoos on her left arm, as well as the mane of fiery hair that fell easily halfway down her back, left loose, as always. The beginnings of a smirk pulled at the other redhead’s face, the faint lines at the side of her left eye stopped by the faint scar that ran across her temple to her hairline.

Before any of them could speak, Anukai had slid past the older women before her, approaching the other woman as a grin tugged at her lips.

“You came.”

Ashana nodded, her gaze flicking down toward the bundle in Anukai’s arms for a moment before returning to meet the new mother’s.

“I heard there were little ones I had to meet.”

Anukai paused for a moment before grinning even broader and nodding.

“Inside, though,” she said, nodding toward the apartment door Ashana had been seated beside moments ago.

The new arrival nodded, stepping aside so Anukai could unlock the front door. As she attempted to push it open with her foot, Ashana quickly stepped in, taking the lead to open and hold it for her. The new mother nodded in thanks, slipping inside the darkened space before turning slowly back toward the entrance as the others followed.

“Look, Lani,” she whispered to the newborn in her arms, “you’re home.”

The tiny redhead continued to fuss and squirm in her arms, prompting her mother to grin.

“You’ll get used to it.”

As she glanced toward the front door, she found the others had already entered, as well, Aloy and Talanah moving to open some of the blinds to let in more light to the darkened apartment. Ashana pushed the door closed behind her, making sure the latch was secure before clearing her throat and moving toward the new mother.

“Do I have your permission to see the child?” she asked, nodding toward the white bundle.

Anukai laughed softly, nodding.

“Of course.”

She turned slightly as Ashana slipped beside her, glancing past her shoulder to see the newborn. The other redhead notably paused as Anukai spared a glance toward her, finding the usually guarded woman’s face had cracked into a soft smile, her gold-green eyes almost seeming to glisten for a moment before she cleared her throat.

“What is the child’s name?”

“ _ Her _ name,” Anukai smirked, “is Talanah.”

“You have named her after the elder one?”

The sound of the Carja woman scoffing in the background prompted both younger women to glance toward her, finding Aloy rolling her eyes as she placed one hand on her elbow.

“We did, yeah,” Anukai answered, bringing Ashana’s attention back to her. “Ara’s taken to calling her Lani already, though, and… I kind of like it.”

“It is a strong name, proven in resilience and strength, already.” she nodded, a smirk tugging at her lips. “Lani carries an endearing quality, as well.”

“Glad you agree.”

Ashana hummed an affirmative before clearing her throat, glancing toward the new mother beside her.

“May I… touch her?”

Anukai nodded, grinning softly as she adjusted her hold on the newborn, pulling back some of the white, bundled blanket about her so the other woman could more easily reach toward her. Ashana carefully ran the back of her fingers across the side of the newborn’s face, prompting her to squirm more, and eliciting a soft laugh in the woman’s chest that only Anukai could hear.

A moment later, the tattooed redhead began to speak, although the words weren’t immediately recognizable. As Anukai listened, she realized that it was Ashana’s native tongue, which she had heard infrequently over the past eight or so years, its sounds almost close enough to ones she recognized, but always just far enough away that she couldn’t quite follow. Her tone, though, told the new mother that it likely wasn’t something bad, as it still remained soft and breathy, but sure in its delivery.

Finally, the words trailed off and Ashana offered another small grin before pulling her hand away from the small Talanah.

“What was that?” Anukai asked softly.

“It is something my people offer to new children,” she replied.

The new mother nodded, offering a small smile to her near mirror image as Ashana returned it. A moment later, she cleared her throat, turning from Anukai to Ikrie.

“There is another, I have heard.”

Ikrie laughed, nodding as she stepped forward, allowing Ashana to get a better view of the one-month old boy in her arms.

“What is this child’s name?”

“His name is Kallik.”

The redhead nodded, staring down at him as he seemed to stare back with intrigue.

“Although I am not familiar with it, it does carry a strong presence, as well,” she said. “Does he also have a second name?”

“Kal,” Ikrie replied, shooting a glance toward her mate with a smirk. “ _ That _ was decided by Anukai.”

Ashana glanced toward her, as well, raising her eyebrows with a grin before turning back to the dark-haired woman and the small boy in her arms.

“I will trust her judgment,” she said. “I can see that Kal has many of the same qualities as his mother, like the small Talanah with her mother.”

“Hopefully all of the best ones,” Anukai chimed in, smirking.

Ikrie shot her a look as Ashana laughed.

“I am certain that he will learn the rest, as well, soon enough.”

With that, she cleared her throat, glancing toward Ikrie for permission as the dark-haired woman nodded. Ashana carefully reached toward Kal, one of his tiny hands reaching for her fingers, and closing around the tips of them as they approached. Soon after, her voice slipped back into the same, native tongue it had carried moments ago. When she had finished, she shook Kal’s hand slightly with her fingers, prompting the boy to laugh and smile.

“I think he likes the sound when you speak like that,” Ikrie said.

“Oh?” Ashana replied, raising her eyebrows before glancing back down at the small boy.

As she spoke in her native tongue, once again, he seemed to fall still, his eyes wide as he stared up at her in rapt attention. The redhead began to grin as she spoke, tilting her head slightly as she raised her eyebrows at him, prompting Kal to laugh.

“It does appear that he is interested by it,” Ashana confirmed.

Shortly after, Anukai slipped away to the room they had set up as their own nursery, complete with two cribs, although she had a feeling it would be some time before she would truly feel comfortable leaving Lani to sleep on her own. Kal had slept in his crib in their bedroom for the past several weeks, after all.

Once the newborn was fed, she quickly changed her into the blue and green one-piece clothing that Aloy and Talanah had gifted them a month or two ago. The small child seemed to squirm slightly at the new clothing for a moment, but quickly settled into the soft fabric as Anukai continued to smile down at her, rubbing her belly with one hand as Lani mewled and gurgled with amusement.

Finally, she lifted her off the table, holding her securely to her chest, a light blue blanket wrapped behind her, still, before returning to the living space. As she entered, she found a new, redheaded figure had appeared, Ara already deep in conversation with Ashana. At the sight of Anukai entering, however, she pulled a double take and grinned.

“I was beginning to wonder if you hid  _ because _ you knew I was coming,” she teased.

“If I did, maybe I’d have hid longer,” the new mother shot back, smirking.

As she came to a stop before her younger counterparts, Ara turned her attention to the smallest, held securely in her mother’s arms.

“I’m surprised she’s awake,” she commented, grinning as Lani’s head rolled to one side, attempting to look toward her.

“She slept all morning,” Anukai sighed. “She’s barely been awake, yet.”

“Already going to be trouble in the night, I can see,” Ara laughed. “Kal doing better with that?”

“Somewhat,” Ikrie said, suddenly appearing beside her mate and prompting her to jump in surprise. “Sorry, just wanted to let you know that Aloy and I have to run to the market quickly.”

“Not Talanah?”

“It, uh… might be a little heavy.”

Both women flashed each other tight-lipped expressions before Anukai nodded. Ikrie offered a small smile in response before leaning in toward the tiny redhead held against her chest.

“Be right back, little Lani,” she cooed, leaning in to place a soft kiss against her forehead.

As their daughter made noises in contentment, Ikrie turned to offer a full kiss to Anukai before finally turning to Aloy and nodding toward the door. The two of them quickly slipped away as the new mother glanced past Ara to find Talanah cradling Kal in her arms, but it was clear he was already beginning to fuss without his mother, despite the Carja’s best efforts.

Anukai smirked as the other two glanced toward the struggling woman for a moment before Ashana quickly slipped past Ara, coming to a stop before Talanah and leaning forward so she could see Kal. As she began to speak in her native tongue, once again, he seemed to fall still, his eyes widening as he stared up at her. After several long moments of speaking, Ashana fell silent, grinning as she raised her eyebrows at the boy.

“Careful, or he’s going to learn that before he learns to speak like us,” Ara teased.

“You say that as if it would be a bad thing,” Ashana shot back, smirking.

Anukai rolled her eyes but noted that while Kal seemed amused by her found sister’s voice, he was also beginning to grow restless, again. The new mother nodded toward the boy, prompting Ashana to glance back at him before clearing her throat.

“May I, Talanah?”

The other two redheads seemed to freeze as they stared at her incredulously, the Carja also seeming surprised for a moment or two before nodding and carefully transferring Kal to her arms. As she held him against her chest, somewhat awkwardly at first, her posture began to relax.

What surprised all of them the most, however, was when she laughed.

Anukai and Ara continued to stare at her with wide-eyed expressions as Ashana began to gently rock Kal, the dark-haired boy calming quickly and instead seeming to giggle slightly, his small hands reaching toward some of the fiery locks that had fallen in front of her shoulders. A moment later, she lifted her gaze to the other two, a grin still plastered onto her features.

“I think he may believe I am you,” she said, meeting Anukai’s gaze.

The new mother’s face quickly cracked into a soft smile of her own as she shrugged.

“It’s almost like we look alike.”

A moment later, Kal had managed to grab hold of some of her hair and pulled on it slightly, prompting her to glance down at him.

“Watch yourself, little one.”

Within a half an hour, Aloy and Ikrie returned with whatever they had gone to buy from the market, revealing it to seemingly be several packages of wrapped meat, a burlap bag with something bulky and somewhat round inside, and three bottles of wine. Anukai shot Ara a look as she caught her checking the labels of the alcohol, prompting a sheepish grin from the other redhead as she replaced them on the counter.

“I hope he wasn’t a huge pain,” Ikrie sighed, taking Kal from Ashana after she had dropped the supplies in the kitchenette.

“Not at all,” she replied, shaking her head. “He was quite pleasant.”

“Pleasant?” the dark-haired woman replied, glancing toward Anukai with raised eyebrows. “That’s a new one.”

“Other than his hatred of sleep, he’s been fine,” she shot back, laughing.

“Seems like you just need Ashana to read him some bedtime stories,” Talanah interjected, smirking. “When she speaks, he just goes silent.”

Ikrie turned her raised eyebrows to the other redhead, prompting her to shift uncomfortably, shrugging in an attempt to appear nonchalant as she folded her arms over her chest.

“Our language can be rather poetic, so I am not surprised.”

“It’s the elements of French, I think,” Aloy suddenly interjected, prompting everyone else to turn to her. “What?”

“Elements of what?” Anukai asked.

“French…? The language?”

Silence continued to hang over the room as Aloy swallowed, letting out a short bout of nervous laughter.

“Ancient language,” she muttered. “You all—well,  _ most _ of you—should remember that from APOLLO.”

The younger members of the group shuffled awkwardly as Talanah scoffed, bracing her hands on her hips.

“You all didn’t  _ slack off _ instead of completing your courses, did you?”

They all hurried to shake their heads, except Ara, who shrugged, prompting an eyeroll from Talanah as she sighed exasperatedly.

“Why am I not surprised…?”

After a large dinner of roasted and seasoned meat, mashed potatoes mixed with goat’s milk and butter, and a celebratory glass of wine, which Anukai savored greatly, the evening had already begun to fall, bringing with it dark orange light through the open windows. The children had both fallen asleep, as well, prompting the couple to place them in the nursery, but with the monitoring device created by Aloy and linked through GAIA’s systems to the mothers’ Focuses engaged so they would be notified at the first signs of commotion or fussing.

As they returned to the living space, they fell onto the couch with heavy sighs, Ikrie quickly taking her place lying against the redhead’s side, her head propped on her shoulder as she curled her feet under herself. Anukai smirked as she carefully took the offered glasses of wine and handed one to her mate, who accepted graciously and sipped at the dark red liquid.

“So now the fun begins,” Aloy quipped, smirking as she took a seat on the arm of the chair across from them, Talanah’s arm quickly wrapping around her waist from her seat on the main cushion. “Two newborns at once.”

“That’s why there’s two of us,” Anukai shot back, smirking.

“Better keep good track of who was the last to get up in the middle of the night,” she chided. “Don’t need to get into any fights so quickly.”

“Anukai and me—fight?” Ikrie shot back, letting out a loud “pssh” before sipping at her wine.

The others gave each other knowing glances as the couple’s faces fell.

“We don’t… really.”

“We’re giving you shit,” Ara shot back, laughing.

The two former Banuk shifted uncomfortably, glancing toward each other before Anukai felt Ikrie lean her weight more heavily into her side. As the redhead glanced back up at the group, she found Aloy’s face had fallen from a playful expression to a sympathetic one.

“I’m sure you two will do fine,” she said. “I’ve yet to see a better team.”

“Oh, you haven’t?” Talanah interjected, sarcasm heavy in her voice.

“I don’t know, we didn’t have to coordinate both of us being pregnant at once in addition to all of our other duties at the Palace.”

The Carja let out a short laugh, sipping at her wine before sighing heavily.

“I’m sure we could have.”

Aloy gave her a soft smile as Talanah squeezed her waist a little tighter for a moment before pressing a kiss against her back. The corner of Anukai’s lips ticked up into a slight smirk as she laughed softly, slowly sipping at her drink, as well.

“So what about you, Ash?” Ara interjected, bringing everyone’s attention to the tattooed woman, who stood leaning against the wall beside the couch.

“What about me?”

“Your team with that mate of yours still strong?”

“As ever,” Ashana nodded.

“So why didn’t he come this time?” Ara pressed, raising her eyebrows. “Didn’t want to meet his mate’s niece and nephew?”

“He sends his best regards,” she replied, “but there were other matters in our town that did not permit both of us to leave for an extended period, as this trip requires.”

The group nodded in acknowledgement as a momentary silence fell over them before Ashana’s lips twisted in a faint smirk.

“I also think he does not like the heat of the summer in the desert.”

They all laughed as Ara shook her head, sipping at her drink. As the sound died down, Ikrie cleared her throat, glancing back toward the tattooed redhead and patting the empty seat on the couch beside her.

“You can take a seat, Ash.”

The other woman hesitated for a moment before shrugging.

“I am okay, but thank you.”

The dark-haired woman frowned slightly but ultimately shrugged, turning back to lean her head on her mate’s shoulder.

“So, now that you’re— _ able _ —” Ara began, turning her gaze back to the new mother on the couch across from her and raising her eyebrows, “—are we going out to celebrate?”

“What do you call this?” Anukai laughed.

“I mean… it’s all right…”

She caught Aloy rolling her eyes out of the corner of her eye as Talanah shook her slightly with her arm, only to wince at the motion, but quickly tried to hide it.

“You know… like the old days,” Ara said, grinning devilishly.

An uncomfortable silence hung over the room for a moment or two before the new mother cleared her throat.

“There are some things about the old days I’m okay with staying in the old days…”

Ara’s grin quickly fell as she realized what she had touched on and she swallowed heavily, hiding her paled expression behind another, long pull of her wine, draining the rest of her glass.

“Well… then let’s make the new days much better.”

The group all seemed surprised at her follow-up, prompting Aloy to even physically recoil as she turned toward the younger redhead, blinking rapidly.

“Shit, I finished my wine, but…” Ara began before holding her empty glass in the air before her, sliding forward in her seat on the chair opposite Aloy and Talanah’s, “to this family we’ve managed to pull together, and to the two newest additions to it—which we’re all already  _ so _ taken with—”

A round of soft laughter escaped everyone as Anukai found her smile growing, a warm feeling building in her chest that was distinctly not just from the wine.

“—and to making these new days better than all of those we left behind.”

A moment of silence followed before the new mother cleared her throat, raising her own glass.

“To all of that.”

The group laughed, again, as Anukai noted the small, but incredibly genuine smile on Ara’s face as their gazes met. A chorus of agreement came from the others as they all raised their glasses, until six vessels of varying fullness were raised into the air. With one final nod, they all sipped at them, except for Ara, who simply pulled hers back and twirled the empty glass in her fingers.

Suddenly, the sound of a synthetic chime rang in Anukai’s ear and she jumped slightly before cursing and moving to slide from underneath Ikrie. Her dark-haired mate sat up quickly, taking her near-empty glass as the redhead excused herself, hurrying down the hallway to the nursery and quietly slipping inside. The sound of Lani’s cries immediately drew her to the crib as she reached inside.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” she cooed, lifting the girl from where she had been nestled earlier, bouncing her gently in her arms for a moment or two as she held her close to her chest.

The tiny girl grabbed at the fabric of her tunic and she laughed softly.

“Hungry, I bet.”

With that, she adjusted her tunic before holding Lani close, rubbing her back slowly with one hand. Anukai sighed softly, beginning to pace about the nursery slowly as she shifted her grip so that she could gently run her fingers over the newborn’s head of auburn hair, its color noticeably darker than her own.

“Similar, but different,” she whispered, running the fingers of her right hand gently along the side of the newborn’s face.

A moment later, she heard the sound of the door creaking open and she glanced up to find Ara leaning in through the opening.

“I… uh… just wanted to make sure you didn’t need help,” she said.

“I don’t think you could help me with this, unfortunately,” Anukai laughed, but nodded. “You can come in, still.”

Ara nodded, grinning sheepishly as she slipped inside fully, pushing the door closed behind her.

“She was doing so well,” Ara laughed, lingering by the door as she folded her hands behind her, leaning against the wooden portal.

“She’s fine,” the new mother said, “just hungry.”

“Oh, that I can understand, then.”

They both laughed before falling silent for several moments. Finally, Ara cleared her throat gently, taking a tentative step away from the door. When Anukai didn’t make any motions to stop her, she approached, the new mother instead turning so that Ara could see the newborn more easily.

“Not at all awkward about this, huh?” she asked, smirking.

“I think we of all people don’t have an excuse to be awkward about our bodies,” Anukai shot back, her eyebrows raised.

Ara paused for a moment, her lips pulled into a thin line before a shiver ran through her, prompting the new mother to laugh. Finally, the other woman closed the last few feet, glancing down at the tiny redhead in Anukai’s arms as her face quickly morphed into a grin, a spark appearing in her eyes.

“I… still can’t get over her,” Ara said softly.

“Me neither.”

Ara laughed, but didn’t take her eyes off the child.

“Little Lani… like us, but… not.”

Anukai hummed softly in the affirmative, nodding.

“That hair, though,” she added, “that red will  _ not _ let go, no matter what.”

They both laughed, prompting Lani to pause for a moment, but quickly resume as Anukai rubbed her back through the blanket, gently.

“I… you know what I said earlier,” Ara continued, her voice soft, “wasn’t just bullshit, right?”

The new mother nodded, glancing up from the tiny charge in her arms to meet the familiar gold-green hazel gaze across from her.

“I… anything I can do to help…”

Anukai simply nodded, smiling before glancing back down at Lani, finding that the newborn had evidently had her fill, and was simply lying back in her mother’s arms, her eyes barely open as her small hands seemed to grab at the air absentmindedly before her.

“You want to hold her?”

Ara seemed to freeze, her eyes widening as Anukai’s gaze lifted to hers.

“Y-you… c-can I?” she asked softly, her tone more fragile than the new mother had ever heard it.

Anukai’s grin grew as she nodded. Ara swallowed heavily but carefully accepted the newborn from her mother’s hands as she passed her over. Once Lani was secure in her sister’s grip, Anukai readjusted her tunic, tying it back into place with a sigh. When she glanced back up at Ara, she found the largest smile she had ever seen on the woman’s face plastered across her features.

The shorter-haired sister gently rocked the newborn as she made soft sounds of contentment, her hands notably grabbing at her aunt’s tunic, as well.

“Still hungry? You’re worse than me,” Ara chided softly, instead holding one finger toward the tiny redhead, who quickly took hold of it.

As she watched, Anukai felt a warmth settling into her chest, quickly spreading throughout her limbs, as if borne by her blood.

It settles in her arms, her legs, her fingers, and her toes.

It feels like home.

It feels like…

The new mother felt her eyes growing watery, but she didn’t move to wipe at them, instead letting the first of the hot tears begin to roll down her cheeks. Ara happened to glance up at her a moment later before pulling a double take, concern etched into her features.

“Something wrong?”

Anukai shook her head, smiling despite the wet streaks on her face.

“No… not at all.”

Ara nodded, but didn’t look convinced, prompting the new mother to step forward, gently laying her hand on her sister’s elbow, just above Lani’s head as she glanced down at the newborn, who now seemed to be glancing between them both with fully open eyes.

“She’s happy.”

Ara seemed to pause for a moment before softly clearing her throat.

“You… you sure? How do you—?”

“I just do,” Anukai interrupted. “Call it…  _ connection _ .”

They both exchanged glances, before Anukai leaned in, placing a kiss against her sister’s temple for a moment before turning to stand beside her, once again, staring down at the tiny redhead in her arms.

Silence hung over them, but while it was heavy, it was anything but uncomfortable.

Lani mewled softly in confirmation.

Her mother was right.

After everyone else had left for the evening, the first full night with the new family had begun, and Anukai could already feel it crawling by incredibly slowly. Lani and Kal had prevented them from going right to sleep, but even after they had finally laid down, it felt like only an hour later before the redhead was back up, gently rocking Lani beside her crib a yard or so from their bed.

While it meant she didn’t need to set her Focus to emit an alarm, the newborn’s cries were enough to wake her from a sound sleep. Still, she tried her best not to wake Ikrie, remaining as quiet as possible while still comforting the tiny newborn. When she had finally put her down for the second or third time, Anukai sat on the edge of their bed, rubbing at her eyes, only to realize that she didn’t feel as if she would be able to actually sleep.

Glancing back toward her sleeping mate, she inhaled slowly before rising to her feet and padding out of the room, slipping her Focus beside her ear as she did. As she approached the living space, she heard a soft voice up ahead and she slowed, listening carefully. She stopped at the corner to the room, remaining against the wall as she tried to decipher the words, but quickly realized that they were unrecognizable.

Pulling her lips into a thin line, she began to turn back down the hallway, only for the voice to stop. Pausing, she waited to see if it would start again, and when it did, the words were much more recognizable.

“I have heard the first night has not been restful.”

With a sigh, Anukai padded into the living space, finding Ashana seated on the edge of the couch, dressed in a sleeveless, black top and grey, cotton shorts, her hands braced on the cushions to either side of her as she glanced toward the new arrival.

“I’m sorry if she’s kept you up,” Anukai mumbled.

“Not at all,” she replied, shaking her head. “I do not sleep well in the heat, anyway.”

The new mother’s lips pulled into a thin line, but Ashana didn’t seem to notice as she slid to one side of the couch, glancing toward the empty space before turning back to her found sister. Anukai wordlessly took her offer, falling onto the couch with a sigh and rubbing at her eyes tiredly.

“It appears you cannot sleep, as well,” Ashana said softly.

“I want to…  _ so _ badly,” the new mother muttered, “but… I just can’t… I don’t know why.”

“Excitement.”

“I would be excited if I  _ could _ sleep,” Anukai muttered sarcastically.

“It will come in time,” Ashana assured, nodding as she turned to face the new mother, crossing her legs before her on the couch. “It is only your first night.”

Anukai nodded, sinking deeper into her seat on the couch as she exhaled heavily.

“This changing your opinion for yourself?”

She noticed Ashana stiffen on the other end of the furniture, prompting her to glance over.

“I have not stated that I—that I would consider a child or children of my own,” she replied.

“No, but I saw the way you looked at Kal earlier today,” Anukai replied, grinning tiredly. “You didn’t have to say a word for me to know what was running through that head of yours.”

The other woman’s jaw worked tensely as she pulled her long mane of hair to one side, bunching it over one shoulder as she absentmindedly ran the fingers of one hand through it.

“I… I have not truly considered,” she finally said, her voice languid, almost as if lost in a trance. “My people, we… it would be more common of someone our age when we met. Now…”

“It’s not impossible,” Anukai replied, laughing. “I did it, so…”

Ashana’s lips pulled into a small grin as she nodded.

“This is true.”

A long few moments of silence fell over them before Anukai took a deep breath, lifting her feet to carefully place them on the edge of the low table before her.

“I didn’t even expect myself to do it, really,” she muttered.

“Oh?”

The new mother nodded.

“Ikrie was the one who asked first… brought it up…”

Anukai trailed off, her vision sliding out of focus as she stared at the faint glow of the candle on the table to the right of her feet.

“When she did, though, I… I couldn’t say no.”

“This almost sounds like regret.”

Anukai quickly snapped out of her daze, shaking her head.

“Absolutely not,” she said quietly but firmly, turning to meet Ashana’s gaze. “I would  _ never _ change my mind.”

The other redhead raised her eyebrows, nodding slowly as the new mother sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose with her right hand.

“I’m sorry, I… tired, y’know…”

“You do not need to apologize.”

Silence hung over them for another brief period, Ashana continuing to comb through her fiery mane with one hand while Anukai leaned her head back to stare up at the ceiling, her eyelids almost drifting closed for a moment before a sudden thought pushed them back open.

“Thanks for coming,” she said, rolling her head to one side to look toward Ashana.

“Of course,” the other woman replied, nodding. “As soon as I received Aloy’s message that Kallik had been born and the young Talanah would be in a few weeks’ time, I left as soon as I was able.”

“You made good time.”

“It was an important journey.”

They both laughed softly for a moment before Anukai inhaled slowly through her nose.

“I… I know you can’t stay for too long,” she continued, “you’ve always had Sorin and your home out east and I don’t fault you at all, but… do you… do you  _ want _ a role… in Lani and Kal’s lives?”

Ashana paused with her fingers halfway through her hair before she inhaled deeply, extracting her hands and folding them in her lap before her.

“I do, if you are willing to allow it,” she said slowly. “As Ara stated earlier, we have come together as a family—as unusual and not normal as it is—and I do not wish to shy away from my roles as part of it.”

Silence fell over them for another few moments before a small smile cracked Anukai’s face and she reached toward her sister, letting her right hand hang palm-up in the air between them. Ashana stared at it for a moment or two before her expression cracked into a softer one, as well, as she reached forward, laying her hand atop Anukai’s. The touch was incredibly calloused but warm, as their grip tightened for a moment before they both let their hands fall onto the couch between them.

“I must admit,” Ashana said softly, the familiar gold-green meeting Anukai’s with a spark that almost seemed to reflect from the candlelight beside her for a moment, “I am filled with a quite proud feeling that the little ones may know me as Aunt Ashana.”

The new mother’s face cracked into an even broader smile as they both laughed softly.

“They will, Ash… they will.”


	14. They'll Know You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

Ikrie found herself surfacing from sleep even as she desperately tried to cling to it, especially when it had been so fleeting in the past few weeks, but eventually she found herself opening her eyes, staring blankly at the dark wall across from her. The dark-haired woman sighed, closing her eyes again, but something kept her wide awake, no matter how much her limbs begged for rest. Exhaling another sigh, she finally rolled onto her back, rubbing at her eyes for a moment before letting her hands fall onto her stomach as her head rolled to her left.

A frown set into her lips as she noted the other half of the bed empty, and she glanced toward the door across from the foot of the bed to find it left partially open. Ikrie debated simply letting it go and trying to fall asleep, once again, but the other part of her mind won out and she threw the sheets aside, turning to place her feet on the wood floor as she hung her head for a moment. With a groan, she rose to her feet, rubbing at the back of her neck as she plodded toward the door, gently pushing it open with her free hand while glancing into the hallway beyond. The majority of the apartment beyond was dark, although she noted a faint glow coming from the first door on her left and a small grin tugged at her lips.

The dark-haired woman padded carefully to the door, pressing her ear against it and closing her eyes as she attempted to listen. Despite her best efforts, she couldn’t detect any sounds from within, so she moved away from the door, carefully gripping the handle and pushing it open a crack. As she pushed the door open further, she found the nursery room bathed in a gentle, orange glow, but still no signs of motion or life. Finally, as she stepped into the space, she glanced around the edge of the door before pausing, a soft smile tugging at her lips.

Anukai sat in the rocking chair set in the far corner, her head bowed toward a small shape held in the crook of her left arm. The redhead’s fingers trailed over the small figure’s face for a moment before she finally seemed to become aware of Ikrie as she gently pushed the door closed behind her.

“You should sleep,” Anukai whispered as she approached.

“Can’t,” the dark-haired woman replied, shaking her head.

The redhead frowned, prompting Ikrie to grin as she came to a stop before her, leaning forward to place a gentle kiss on her forehead.

“Looks like you couldn’t, either,” she whispered.

“I mean…” Anukai replied, grinning sheepishly as she glanced down at the small body held against her chest.

Ikrie glanced down, as well, to find the tiny redhead fast asleep, her face turned in toward the warmth of her mother’s bosom as her small hands seemed to grasp at the air and the fabric of Anukai’s tunic absentmindedly.

“She hungry?”

“A little,” Anukai shrugged. “Just couldn’t sleep without me, I guess.”

“I understand her.”

The older redhead grinned, glancing back up at Ikrie as the dark-haired woman returned it, moving behind her and leaning against the back of the chair, wrapping her arms loosely around Anukai’s shoulders as she did, nestling her face against the loose mane of copper hair before her. They both remained silent for several moments before Ikrie finally shifted her position, moving so she could see past Anukai’s face to the small charge in her arms, finding the redhead gently running the tip of her thumb along the edge of the infant’s face, once again, brushing at the head of red hair that was already well on its way to fullness.

They remained in the same position for several long minutes before the sounds of commotion from the other crib prompted Ikrie to sigh and rise from her position behind Anukai.

“It’s like you knew,” the redhead whispered.

Ikrie shrugged, approaching the edge of the crib and leaning over its side, scooping up the charge within with a soft groan.

“It’s okay Kal,” she said softly, holding the slightly older boy to her chest as she rocked him gently. “I’m here, now.”

The dark-haired boy refused to calm, however, prompting Ikrie to turn back to Anukai.

“Hate to ask…”

The redhead grinned, shaking her head.

“It’s fine.”

Anukai carefully rose from her chair, moving to the other crib before gently lying Lani inside it, wrapping her in the blankets within before turning back to Ikrie and holding out her arms. The dark-haired woman moved toward her, handing the small boy toward her. As the redhead accepted the small charge, Ikrie couldn’t help but notice how she carefully positioned the blanket-wrapped infant against her left arm, once again, while she reached toward him with her right, attempting to gently comfort Kal as he began to work himself into more of a fuss.

“I’ll be quick,” Ikrie muttered, earning a nod from Anukai before the dark-haired woman quickly slipped into the hallway beyond.

She quickly made her way through the darkened apartment toward the living space, catching the edge of one of the chairs with her hip and wincing as she sucked in a sharp breath through clenched teeth. As Ikrie limped toward the kitchenette, going about the motions of filling a bottle with the formula Aloy and GAIA had helped provide before beginning to heat it on the small hot plate on one counter.

While waiting, the dark-haired woman’s fingers drummed on the countertop, her jaw working slowly in thought as her mind wandered back to the image of Anukai a moment ago. It wasn’t the first time she had noticed, but something about this particular night had set her off, gotten her thinking. The thought continued to grow and fester in the back of her mind before Ikrie finally let out a heavy sigh, hanging her head as she shook it slowly.

A moment later, she retrieved the formula, checking the temperature of a small sample on her wrist before turning off the plate and moving to return to the nursery, the limp from her accident earlier mostly gone. When she entered the candle-lit room, she found Anukai back in the chair, rocking slowly as she muttered softly to Kal, although he had notably refused to calm. When the redhead spotted Ikrie with the bottle, she shot her a relieved look.

“Couldn’t tame the beast?” the dark-haired woman teased, carefully taking the infant and adjusting him in her arms until she was able to hold him and also hold the bottle for easy access.

Almost immediately, Kal took to it and fell quiet and still, prompting a sigh from Anukai.

“I think he just can’t sleep without  _ you _ ,” she whispered.

Ikrie shrugged.

“He’s hungry.”

The redhead let out a soft laugh as she stepped closer, gently running the fingers of her right hand around the edges of Kal’s face.

“That I can relate to.”

Ikrie grinned for a moment, but it quickly fell as her mind returned to the thoughts from moments ago in the kitchenette. Finally, the dark-haired woman drew a slow, deep breath before glancing up at Anukai.

“I… noticed how you were holding Lani.”

Confusion creased the redhead’s face as she glanced up at Ikrie.

“What do you mean?”

“I… I mean…”

Anukai continued to stare back at her with confusion until the dark-haired woman drew a slow, shaky breath.

“You’re only touching Kal and Lani with your right hand.”

The redhead paused for a moment, letting out a soft “oh” as Ikrie noted how the fingers of her left hand curled into a fist for a moment.

“I-I… they say—Aloy and GAIA say—you’re supposed to…”

“Anukai…”

The redhead took a deep breath as she shrugged.

“So?”

“So I noticed.”

Anukai rolled her eyes.

“And what’s your point?”

“Why?”

The redhead blinked in response, seemingly surprised by her question.

“W-why?”

Ikrie nodded, glancing down at Kal for a moment before returning her gaze to Anukai.

“I-I… because I…”

The dark-haired woman waited patiently as the redhead continued to stammer and stall, until finally she let out a tired sigh.

“Because I… I don’t want them to… to have their earliest memories be… feeling…  _ that _ .”

She raised her left hand, turning the metal appendage over slowly as she flexed and curled her fingers.

“To feel a—a  _ machine _ ,” she spat, venom lacing her otherwise soft tone, “so young.”

“They won’t.”

“How could they not?” Anukai shot back, instantly, freezing as the volume of her voice had begun to rise, but Kal seemed unperturbed and Lani remained quiet in her crib. “Also… what if… what if I…?”

Ikrie noted how the redhead’s eyes had begun to grow red and watery and she felt a heavy, dense feeling appear in her chest.

“You won’t.”

“You don’t know that.”

“You’ve never hurt me.”

“You’re—bigger—it’s not as easy…”

“Anukai,” Ikrie said softly, but with enough force that it carried as much weight as if she had shouted, “listen to me. I have seen you give nothing but love to these two. I’ve seen the way you look at them, the way you hold them, the way you talk to them… you would  _ never _ harm them.”

The redhead slowly shook her head, squeezing her eyes closed.

“I know, I don’t want to, but…”

“You—aren’t—able—to,” Ikrie said insistently. “It’s been—what, almost ten years living with your arm?”

The redhead nodded.

“It’s not some unknown force… it’s  _ you _ .”

Anukai remained silent, still not meeting the dark-haired woman’s gaze until she leaned forward slightly.

“Anukai, look at me,” Ikrie whispered.

The redhead finally lifted her gaze, revealing the wet trails running across the field of freckles below her eyes.

“Believe me… and believe in yourself.”

Anukai drew a shaky breath, giving a small nod before sniffling softly, rubbing at her eyes with the back of her right hand. A moment later, Kal seemed to have had his fill and pushed away from the bottle, prompting Ikrie to pull it away, stepping toward a bureau on the opposite side of the room and placing the mostly empty vessel on its top. The infant boy in her arms lay much stiller than he had before, but was still not entirely asleep as Ikrie gently wiggled her fingers before him, prompting him to grab at them.

With a small smile, the dark-haired woman returned to Anukai, pausing to glance up at her.

“Come on, say goodnight, too,” she whispered.

The redhead nodded, holding out her arms for Kal. When Ikrie began to hand him to her, she noted how Anukai attempted to hold him in the crook of her left arm, but the dark-haired woman paused, shaking her head.

“Ikrie…”

“I told you to believe me.”

“I-I know, but…”

“Try it.”

The redhead shifted uncomfortably, but eventually took Kal in her right arm, her left hand hovering at her side as she stared down at the infant boy, her lower lip trembling slightly.

“It’s okay…”

“But… so far… he’s never felt…”

“He needs to at some point.”

“What if he’s scared?”

“You don’t know that.”

“But it doesn’t… it would feel like…”

Ikrie gently laid a hand on the redhead’s shoulder, staring directly into her gold-green hazel eyes.

“He will only know it as  _ you _ … as his mother… the same goes for Lani.”

Anukai paused for a moment longer before slowly raising her left hand toward the rapidly tiring infant. The metallic fingers curled into a fist for a moment before she relaxed them, once again, nervously closing the gap. When they were within reach, Kal’s tiny hands grabbed for them, closing around the fingertips. Ikrie watched as the boy paused for a moment before continuing to grab at the appendages, just as he had done with her own moments ago.

The dark-haired woman glanced up at Anukai’s face to find the corners of her lips pulling back in what seemed to be a smile, even as her lower lip trembled slightly and tears continued to spill from the corners of her eyes.

“See?” Ikrie whispered, rubbing at the redhead’s shoulder slowly.

Anukai nodded, attempting to bite down on her lower lip to stop it from shaking, but it did little to hide the new abundance of tears that rolled down her cheeks.

“Isn’t that right, Kal?” Ikrie muttered softly, gently tickling at the infant’s stomach as he also seemed to smile.

Eventually, the small, dark-haired boy finally seemed to fall asleep, once again, and Anukai carefully laid him in his crib, letting out a slow, heavy sigh as she stepped away from it. When she turned around, she found Ikrie watching her with a small, but incredibly genuine smile on her face.

“It’s a start,” the redhead said softly.

Ikrie nodded, before stepping forward and wrapping her arms tightly around her, Anukai returning the embrace quickly. The dark-haired woman rubbed at her back as she felt the first hints of wet spots appearing on the shoulder of her sleep shirt from the redhead burying her face in it.

“I’m proud of you,” Ikrie whispered softly, slowly pulling back from the embrace to cup the redhead’s face in both hands. “Also, I love you, I believe in you, and you’re already an amazing mother to Lani and Kal.”

Anukai let out a choked sound as more tears rolled down her face, but Ikrie quickly leaned forward, placing soft kisses on her cheeks to stop them before they reached the bottom. Just as she did, the sounds of motion and the soft beginnings of noises from the crib behind Ikrie prompted both women to pause before they laughed softly.

“Guess that’s our fault,” Anukai sighed.

“She’s needy, just like her mother,” Ikrie teased.

The redhead rolled her eyes, but the dark-haired woman caught the hints of redness that had begun to spread across her cheeks just before she slipped past her to approach the other crib.

“Shh, Lani, it’s okay, it’s okay,” Anukai muttered, leaning over the edge of the crib toward her.

As Ikrie watched, she noted how the redhead gently consoled the infant girl for a moment with her right hand, before pausing and slowly switching to her left. As with Kal, Lani seemed to pause for a moment, before Ikrie watched the small girl reach for Anukai’s fingers, grasping onto them as tightly as she could. The dark-haired woman grinned as the redhead glanced up at her, a look somewhere between happiness and surprise on her face. As Ikrie approached her, she came to a stop behind Anukai, wrapping her arms loosely around her midsection as she rested her chin on the redhead’s shoulder.

“I told you…”


	15. The Return

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by imagine0314 and NorthernGhost

The journey back from Meridian had felt longer, somehow, and Ashana spent the next two weeks of travel mulling over her visit, the gallop of the Strider beneath her little more than background noise compared to the torrent of thoughts tumbling through her mind. Their farewells had been a little more strained than usual, the parting far more bittersweet than years prior. 

She recalled the tight embrace of the other redheads as she had bid them goodbye, her own hesitance to leave her family and new niece and nephew warring with her desire to return to Sorin. As she neared Tehawus, she found her conversation with Anukai turning over and over in her head:  
  
 _“I saw the way you looked at Kal.”_

Ashana shook her head, her fiery mane swinging with the motion. No. Things would not change. They could not. The opportunity for such things was long past, if it had been at all.

She sighed, bringing her Strider back to its shelter with the others as she finally crossed into Tehawus, adjusting her pack on her shoulders before beginning the walk through her village that would lead toward home. Finally, she arrived at the familiar wood of her door, her knuckles rapping against the entrance, only to have it opened before she could reach her second knock.   
  
“I have waited long for your return,” Sorin said, the corners of his mouth ticking up just a bit.

He ushered her inside and closed the door behind them, performing the well-established ritual of taking her coat and bag and directing her to the seat opposite his where a glass filled with amber liquid awaited her. Before she sat, Ashana reached for her mate, pulling him tightly to her before breathing out.  
  
“I missed you,” she said quietly.   
  
“And I, you,” Sorin replied as they parted, tilting her head up toward his and bending down to kiss her.

Ashana took a seat, letting the nearby fire warm her as she sank into the soft leather of her chair. Her fingers played with the glass nearby, though she did not drink from it, appearing distracted instead.  
  
“Everything went well, yes?” Sorin asked after several minutes. 

“Oh,” Ashana said, shaking her head affirmatively. “Yes. My sister and her mate both recovered easily. Their children--Talanah and Kallik--are...I am fond of them.”

Sorin smiled softly, taking a sip of his own drink. “I look forward to meeting them one day. Did you find your new role...enjoyable?”  
  
“I did,” Ashana admitted, still playing with the edge of her glass. “I did not know being their aunt would strike me so, though it appears my sister Ara is equally taken with them. I think they are good for her. She and Anukai have grown close during the year I was away.”   
  
“And is your...is Aloy involved?”   
  
“Every moment she can be,” the redhead said with a hint of amusement. “She is thrilled beyond measure. She gave Talanah--Lani--her house name. The elder Talanah gave hers to the boy, Kallik, who my sister has taken to calling Kal.”

“Quite the honor.”

Ashana nodded, unsure of what else to say. So much had happened in the two months she’d been gone and she felt ill equipped to express it all at once. She couldn’t help the sensation that now something was _missing_ , a hole appearing in her otherwise complete existence, compelling her to poke at the raw edges.  
  
“Are you all right?” Sorin asked, shaking her out of her thoughts.   
  
“Why do you ask?”   
  
“You have not touched your drink.”

\------

Three weeks had passed since Ashana had returned home and her silence had been unsettling, even by Sorin’s quiet standards. She’d spent her days buried in her work, focused on her monitors with the other Light Talkers, the redhead diving deep into her on-going inter-tribal project, staying up well into the night just to get a little more done. This was what she needed--more work, more _distractions_. Ashana had hoped that it would prevent her from continuing to prod at the feelings pressing at her chest, though she had to admit the futility of her efforts when she found she couldn’t stop turning over her last visit to Meridian in her head.

She recalled how good it had felt, and how she’d been left with an unending tug in her ribs, one that wouldn’t go away no matter how much she worked or drank or slept. Her Focus pinged, alerting her to yet another message from Anukai and Ikrie. There was no text, but simply a picture attached of Kal and Lani sleeping side-by-side on a blanket spread across their floor. Ashana found herself smiling eagerly before the realization of what her face betrayed caused her to frown, swiping away the image and quickly adding it to her archive. She rubbed at her eyes and shut down her monitors, preparing to leave.

She had come home late, sighing as she turned the handle of her door and entered their shared home without fanfare. She quietly removed her boots only to raise her head and find Sorin standing before her with his arms crossed.  
  
“Something is wrong,” he said flatly, without a hint of mirth in his voice. His jaw was tense and his arms were crossed tightly over his chest.   
  
Ashana looked up, brushing back her lengthy red hair. “At the workshop?”

“No, with you.”

Ashana froze. She and Sorin rarely fought or disagreed, and she knew well enough by now that he always chose his words carefully.   
  
“What are you saying?”   
  
Sorin sighed, unfolding his arms. “I am saying that the woman standing before me is not the same one who left for the west. Something is bothering you.”

Ashana clenched her jaw, attempting to move past him. There was nothing wrong, she insisted to herself. She ignored the ache in her chest and didn’t meet his gaze.

“Speak it,” Sorin said firmly.

“There is nothing to say,” she replied indignantly.  
  
“You have never lied to me, Ashana. Do not start now.”

She pressed her lips thin, pride and frustration warring with her desire to be honest with her mate. “Pour me a drink.”

The tall blonde raised an eyebrow but acquiesced, walking over to the kitchen and fetching a bottle of her favorite. He poured one for each of them in a glass before he brought it back to their sitting room and set the two drinks on the table.

Ashana took her usual seat by the fire, rubbing tiredly at her eyes before she took a large swallow of the liquid, its familiar burn a comfort against the awkwardness she felt. She could hear her mate take his own seat across from her. 

“What is it, Ashana?”  
  
The redhead took another swig before setting the glass down, its contents now nearly empty.   
  
“Do you think I was wrong?” she asked ruefully.

“Wrong about what?”  
  
“For never considering children,” Ashana admitted, blushing with embarrassment.   
  
Sorin paused, his lips parted in surprise. This was _not_ what he had feared. This was so _very_ different and unexpected. “I have supported you, always, in whatever you wanted.”

“And you did not wish I were like the other women of the village? Content to have children as soon as we were united?”

“I was happy to have you as you are. Nothing more. Nothing less. You wanted freedom, adventure, the truth of your origins in the Light and so you went west and I supported it. Your choice is yours, alone. It has never been a burden to me,” he said softly. “Where is this coming from?”

“I...glimpsed a life I could have led, held a boy soothed by our words and a girl who looked _just_ like me.”   
  
“Do you regret the life you lead now?” Sorin asked gently.   
  
“No. But I would be lying if I said it did not make me consider where to go from here,” she said, sipping the very last of her glass before Sorin reached over and poured her another.

“So where do we go, then? Wherever it is, I will follow.”

Ashana found herself suddenly embarrassed, hesitant to give voice to the thought that had lingered in her head for weeks. 

“I know it is not common here to delay so long. I had not truly considered. There were so many things I wanted to do, and I did them...and then recovery after the Port was...difficult and I could not bring myself to think it then.”  
  
“The Port...I know it changed you,” Sorin admitted.   
  
“It was not the only reason,” Ashana said softly. “I...did not ever consider myself well suited for it, not truly. Not with the life I have led, or the person that I am...but, I watched my sisters--as if myself--and the longer I spent with the children, the more I...what does it say about me if I change my mind?”   
  
“It says that you have forged your own path. Where it goes is entirely up to you. Besides,” he said, “I have always thought you would be good at it.”

Ashana swallowed heavily, taking in his words.  
  
“...Sorin, what if we...would you want--”   
  
“Yes,” he said simply. 

“--I have not even finished the question--”

“I already know my answer,” he grinned. “You are the one who struggles with the question. I have known from the day we were united that if you wished it, it would be my honor. And if you did not, that I would be content to be at your side regardless.”

Ashana paused, realizing a lightness had settled where the heavy weight had been sitting in her core for the past few weeks. She sat her drink down before reaching her hand out to the side of her mate’s face and pulled him in for a kiss, the motion far stronger than usual.

“If that is how you truly feel, then I do not struggle with the question,” she whispered in his ear, “not with you by my side.”

Sorin pulled back only to kiss her once again. “Then say it,” he replied, his voice low, his blue eyes burning into her.

Ashana swallowed heavily before running her hand through her mate’s hair and cupping his jaw, the light from the nearby fire flickering against her face.

“Have a child with me, Sorin.”

\------

Sorin’s arms wrapped around Ashana’s middle, his hands hanging low and coming to rest on the swell he found there. 

“What are you doing?” he asked, leaning down to tuck his head between her neck and shoulder while her fingers danced in the air.  
  
“Sending a message through the Light to my sisters,” she answered, her gaze fixated on something only her Focus could reveal.   
  
“You mean to tell them of our son?”

Ashana shook her head. It would be one thing if they were here in person for the next few months--and she nearly wished it were true. She knew her family out west would want to know in advance, but it was not the way of things here. She could never forgive herself if she had dared to instill such hope only for it to be dashed away. It was not a thing to be talked about lightly until it happened.  
  
“No, it would be ill-fated to do so.”   
  
“Those are just old traditions--” Sorin began.   
  
“I _believe_ in this _old tradition_ ,” Ashana said firmly. “I could not bear it if all does not come to pass and neither could they. I would not do that to them. I will not speak of our child to them until he is here.”

“So then what do you mean to tell them?”

“That I will be late for the coming year’s visit by several weeks,” she said, continuing to type at the virtual keyboard.  
  
“You intend to bring him, then?” Sorin asked, smiling with delight as he felt movement beneath his palm.   
  
“I do. Would you stop me from taking him west so soon?”   
  
“No,” Sorin said, “I would join you. Family is important.”

She leaned toward him and kissed his cheek before hitting ‘send’ and closing the interface. Her fellow redheads would understand, she hoped. She idly thought about their reaction for a moment before a warm feeling of safety washed over her. 

She hadn’t felt something like that since…

And suddenly Ashana recalled holding Lani months prior, a similar feeling surging through her limbs, and the look on her sister’s face...like she _knew_. She placed her hand on top of her mate’s and looked down. 

She could feel her son, not simply moving within, but in the _place_ they shared together.

\------

Months had passed in a blur since Ashana’s last cryptic message, the redhead from the east now several weeks past her usual visit. Anukai had tried not to worry--Ashana had always come and gone as she’d pleased--and caring for Kal and Lani had prevented her from having enough free time to let her thoughts linger on _what-ifs._

The former Banuk frowned ever so slightly as she stared at the message on her Focus’s interface, her fingers tapping along the tops of her thighs for a moment before she felt a familiar embrace reach around from behind her. The feeling of Ikrie’s arms wrapping securely around her shoulders broke her out of her daze.  
  
“Everything okay?” the dark-haired woman asked, pressing a soft kiss to the side of her mate’s throat.

“Yeah, just...got a strange message from Ash,” the redhead muttered, half to herself.  
  
“Oh?”

Anukai’s frown deepened for a moment before she sighed.  
  
“You know how she said her trip this year was going to be delayed by a few months?” 

“Is she all right?” Ikrie asked, concern crossing her features.  
  
Anukai rubbed at her eyes. “No idea, but she just messaged me to say she’ll be here tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?!” Ikrie repeated, the surprise evident in her tone. “That’s...sudden.”  
  
“And unlike her,” the redhead added. “She’s never been one for lots of communication, but...more than this, usually.”   
  
The dark-haired woman nodded against the side of her mate’s head before sighing. “Guess this means we should make sure the apartment is actually clean, then.”   
  
“Actually?”   
  
“I know the kind of messes you and Lani get up to,” Ikrie smirked, kissing the side of Anukai’s head.   
  
“She’s barely a year old,” the redhead retorted, rolling her eyes. “What kind of messes could she be making?”   
  
“ _Lani’s_ not the messy one.”   
  
Anukai shot a rueful glance at Ikrie who grinned before pressing a kiss against her lips.   
  
“It’s a good thing the two of you are so cute,” Ikrie laughed. “I’ll call Aloy and let her know the spare apartment’s about to be occupied.”   
  
Anukai nodded and took a seat on the floor beside her two children, where they both appeared to be playing with the stuffed Watchers she had made for their birthdays.   
  
“You two excited to see Aunt Ashana tomorrow?” she asked, grinning.   
  
The little ones glanced up at her excited tone, Kal tilting his head to one side slightly, an excited sounding gurgle escaping the boy.   
  
“Mama,” he said, definitively, reaching for her. 

“Not quite,” Anukai laughed. “But she looks close enough. She’s my sister. Like Aunt Ara.”  
  
Lani cooed contentedly at the sound of her other aunt’s name, prompting the older redhead to smirk. 

“She hasn’t seen you two in a year,” she continued. “She’s going to be so excited.”  
  
The rest of the evening passed uneventfully, the family sharing a meal just before sunset and the children finally falling asleep just as the sun sank below the horizon. Thankfully, the two now slept through most of the night, much to their mothers’ relief.   
  
“I still don’t think I’m ever going to catch up on the sleep I lost those first few months,” Anukai laughed, taking a seat on the couch beside her mate as Ikrie began the moving picture file synched between their Focuses. Ikrie wrapped her arms around the redhead, leaning into the other woman’s shoulder.   
  
“I know the feeling.”   
  
The two remained quiet throughout the picture, although Anukai began to blink heavily several times, slowly edging toward sleep, only to reopen them when she felt Ikrie move beside her. When it finally ended, Ikrie closed the interface and yawned, beginning to stand.   
  
“Ash say what time she’s getting here tomorrow?” 

Anukai shook her head.  
  
“Just ‘tomorrow’.”

“Knowing her, that’s anywhere from the crack of dawn until the middle of the night,” Ikrie laughed, brushing some of her shoulder-length, dark hair behind one ear before offering a hand to help pull Anukai to her feet. She quickly wrapped her arms around the other woman’s waist as soon as she was standing. “You’re worried.”  
  
“About what?”

“Ash.”  
  
Anukai shrugged, the two of them swaying side to side slightly.   
  
“She knows what she’s doing. I’m not worried about her getting hurt.”   
  
“No, but, the delay for a few months without explanation and then just...at our doorstep out of nowhere?” Ikrie replied, raising her eyebrows. “Feels like there’s something she’s not telling us.”   
  
“Well you _do_ have a way of deciphering redheads,” Anukai shot back, smirking.   
  
Ikrie laughed before pressing a kiss against her.   
  
“You’re a simple people.”   
  
“Hey, now!”

\------  
  
They awoke the next day, pink morning light beginning to stream into the apartment. There was no message from Ashana, and so they set about their usual routine, though Anukai checked with the rest of the family to see if they had heard anything, either. Aloy seemed equally dumbfounded, having only received the same message as Anukai the day prior, while Ara had claimed not to have received it until she realized she had missed the notification, prompting Anukai to roll her eyes.

“Well when she shows up at your door, just let me know,” Ara sighed on the call, her voice distorted slightly by the signal. “Don’t really have any plans today, anyway.”

Almost as soon as she had finished speaking, the sound of a loud knock from the front door of the apartment prompted Anukai to glance over.   
  
“I think that might be her,” Anukai said quickly.   
  
“Right now??”   
  
“I’ll let you know, gotta go.”

The former Banuk ended the call, tapping her Focus to close the interface and hurrying out of the bedroom. As she reached the living space, she found Ikrie beginning to rise from her seat on the couch where she’d been watching over Lani and Kal. They exchanged glances before Anukai made her way to the door, taking a deep breath before pulling it open.  
  
Almost immediately, the head of fiery hair was easily visible in the bright, morning sunlight outside, drawing Anukai’s attention first. Her gaze quickly locked with the familiar green-gold eyes across from hers as the first hints of a smile appeared in them.

“I hope it is not too early,” Ashana said.  
  
“No, no,” Anukai insisted, “just surprised me a bit. It’s so good to see you.”   
  
She went to wrap the other woman in an embrace only to pause when she noted something on her back. It was common for Ashana to bring a pack of supplies on her journeys west, but it was decidedly _uncommon_ for them to _move_ . Anukai’s eyes went wide as Ashana laughed nervously.   
  
“Anukai...there is a little one you need to meet.” 

Ashana carefully removed the pack from her shoulders, turning it around so that she held it in front of her, revealing a small boy with bright, blue eyes and strawberry-blonde hair who stared up eagerly at Anukai. The former Banuk’s mouth fell open as one hand raised to cover it, her gaze lifting from the infant to the other woman’s face to find her grinning broadly.  
  
“Ashana…”   
  
“This is Elias,” she said. “Elias, this is your aunt, Anukai.”

The infant continued to stare up at the redhead with interest, but remained silent as her gaze fell to him yet again.  
  
“Well hello there, little Elias,” Anukai said softly, gently reaching to run her hand through the tuft of bright hair on his head. “You have the best of your mother and your father’s looks already.”

“He truly does,” Ashana said, glancing over her shoulder to the figure behind her.  
  
Anukai followed her gaze to find Sorin hanging back a few feet behind his mate, smirking.   
  
“Sorin! I’m sorry I didn’t see you. Both of you, come in, come in!”   
  
The two stepped into the apartment as Anukai glanced back to find Ikrie staring curiously across the room from her position near Kal and Lani, the two little ones also looking toward the doorway with interest.

  
“Ikrie, there’s someone you should meet,” Anukai said, grinning.   
  
The dark-haired woman raised her eyebrows, moving around the low table in the center of the room before approaching her mate’s sister. As she did, her eyes found the pack held before her and she gasped, freezing in place for a moment before approaching once again.   
  
“Ash…”   
  
“This is Elias,” Ashana replied.

Ikrie’s face broke into a smile as she leaned in toward the small boy, cooing her greeting while Sorin closed the door behind him. Anukai carefully stepped around Ashana to greet her mate, the two of them grasping each other’s forearms tightly in a traditional hunters’ greeting as they locked eyes and nodded.  
  
“It’s been some time,” Anukai said.   
  
“It has,” he replied, the same accent as her sister’s sounding even more fluid in his deeper tones. “But I felt this may be a journey best made together.”   
  
“For good reason,” the redhead laughed. “How old?”   
  
“Six weeks,” Sorin confirmed.   
  
“So _this_ is why you were delayed, Ash,” Ikrie said, lifting her attention from the gurgling boy held before her.   
  
Ashana nodded in the affirmative, her eyes bright.   
  
“Ash, you...you never told me…” Anukai said, moving beside Ikrie.   
  
“Among our people, we do not like to speak of such things before they have arrived,” she replied. “It is not a short, nor easy, journey, as you well know.”

“She is superstitious,” Sorin chuckled.  
  
“I am _not_ ,” Ashana insisted before relenting. “...Perhaps only about this.”   
  
“I know what it’s like to worry that it won’t work out,” Anukai said, her expression darkening for a moment. “Truly, I understand. Can I...let the others know?”   
  
Ashana met her eyes. “Of course.” 

\------

Ara was the first to arrive, her apartment closer than the others, and as soon as the short-haired woman caught sight of the bundle in Ashana’s arms, her eyes went wide.  
  
“You, too?!” she blurted, seemingly unable to form a more coherent sentence.   
  
The rest of the room erupted in laughter, prompting Ara’s face to flush a deeper red than her hair, but she quickly recovered when her sister introduced her to the infant.   
  
“Oh...you’re going to make me fall for another one,” Ara said, her face cracking into a smile as she gazed down at the little one.   
  
It took Aloy and Talanah nearly another ten minutes to arrive, but as soon as the elder redhead stepped into the room and caught sight of Ashana and the boy, her eyes went wide and her mouth fell open. The younger woman brought Elias to her and as soon as she was able to take in the sight of the little one, the older redhead broke down in tears, Talanah’s arms quickly wrapping around her.   
  
“Ash, I...I’m so proud of you, kiddo, for...whatever it means. I know I’m...not...it’s not quite the same as Anukai and I--” Aloy began, her speech betraying the dual women who spoke with her voice.

The younger redhead paused for a moment before her lower lip seemed to tremble slightly.  
  
“Nonsense. You are the matriarch of this _family_ ,” Ashana said, her lips turning up into a smile. “Your blessing is high praise and I am grateful for it.”

The older redhead glanced back at her for a moment before nodding, gently placing a hand on the younger woman’s shoulder and squeezing it slightly. Ashana didn’t pull away, but instead relaxed into the motion, letting Aloy’s hand linger for a moment or two before they parted.  
  
Ashana moved to find Lani and Kal still playing on the floor nearby. The two paused at her approach, staring up at her with curiosity.   
  
“It has been some time since I have seen you,” she said, kneeling before them. “Do you know me? I am your Aunt Ashana.”   
  
Lani babbled enthusiastically, pointing toward the woman who looked so much like her mother, glancing between the two women with slight confusion before Anukai nodded.   
  
“This is my son, Elias,” Ashana continued, holding the bundle lower so that Lani and Kal could see their younger cousin, who seemed to stare between them with interest. 

The little ones scooted forward to see the new addition, taking care in their touch at Ashana’s insistence. As they did, Anukai couldn’t help the broad smile that spread across her face, her right hand slipping into Ikrie’s grasp as she squeezed her mate’s hand gently. The redhead pressed a quick kiss to Ikrie's cheek before surveying the rest of the room.

Sorin remained by their packs, which had been dropped on the floor behind one of the chairs across from the couch, his face cracking into a smirk as he watched his mate and the children.  
  
Ara remained near him, her arms folded loosely over her chest as she grinned at the scene with delight.   
  
Aloy stood with her arms wrapped around Talanah from the side, her head leaning on her mate’s right shoulder as the Carja’s fingers gently carded through her red and silver hair. She blinked rapidly, doing her best to hint the small hints of redness at the corners of her eyes.   
  
Something hung heavily over the room.   
  
It settles deep in Anukai’s core, pressing against the inside of her ribs.   
  
It’s not painful, but it fills her.   
  
It’s constant, like a pulse.   
  
It’s fluid, like blood pumping through her veins.

It’s warm, like a fire after the sunset.  
  
It’s home.   
  
It’s all of them.  
  
It’s this moment.   
  
Anukai watched as Ashana laughed softly, a broad grin split over her face, the sound of her laughter not as surprising these days, but just as reassuring. Lani and Kal’s gazes both remained fixated on Elias, his tiny fists reaching out toward his cousins.   
  
Ashana glanced up from the scene toward Anukai for a moment, the sisters’ eyes bearing the same feeling behind them before she turned back to the children in front of her.   
  
“I hope that one day you three can be friends.” 


	16. More than Just Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

Anukai put on her best Carja appearance as she wished goodbye to the other adults from the Meridian school for their youngest children, exchanging as few words as necessary with the silk-clad nobles who seemed to fill the course, before finally managing to escort her two charges back to their apartment. As they walked, she noted how Kal seemed to exhibit far less energy than Lani, and she frowned slightly, although quickly tried to hide it as the energetic, young redhead turned to her.

When they finally reached the apartment, Lani quickly made herself scarce, hurrying to her room before declaring that she would rather not be disturbed until dinner. With a shake of her head, Anukai instead turned to Kal, who had remained in the main living space of the apartment, taking a seat on the edge of their couch with a turbulent expression.

“Hey, did everything go okay?” the redhead asked, kneeling before the dark-haired boy.

“I… I guess…” he sighed, shrugging.

Anukai frowned, placing her hands on the boy’s knees.

“That doesn’t sound very encouraging.”

Finally, after another moment or two, he sighed, leaning back on the couch, despite the fact that his head barely reached the cushions at the back side from where he currently sat.

“Someone mistook Lani and me for—friends—again.”

The redhead sighed, rising from her seat before the couch before taking the one next to the dark-haired boy.

“I know it’s not—”

“No one believes that she’s my sister,” Kal interrupted. “It’s… I don’t like it.”

Anukai frowned, gently placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder.

“Is it just because they don’t realize—”

“It’s because I don’t look like her” he said quickly, “or you, or… Aunt Ara or…. Grandma…”

The redhead’s jaw clenched as she felt a tight sensation building in her chest, her hand absentmindedly rubbing at her son’s shoulder.

“The others say I’m just… not really part of the family… that I came from somewhere else.”

Anukai immediately stiffened, her hand pausing on Kal’s shoulder before turning back to him.

“Who says that?”

“The other kids… at my school.”

“And what do they know?”

“That Lani doesn’t look like my sister!”

The redhead’s jaw worked tensely for several moments before she forced herself to take a deep breath.

“Well, you are… so I hope you don’t doubt it.”

“I don’t, but…” Kal, trailing off before sighing, himself. “I think I don’t…”

Anukai recoiled slightly, glancing down at the dark-haired boy beside her before sliding off the couch into a kneeling position before him, once again.

“Why do you think you don’t doubt it?”

“Because… she looks like you,” Kal replied, shrugging, “and Aunt Ara and—”

“Yes, she looks like me, and them,” Anukai interrupted, placing her hands palm-up on Kal’s knees and waiting for him to place his hands in hers before continuing, “but that doesn’t mean that you’re not part of that family.”

“But I look different.”

“So does your Mom,” Anukai replied, shuffling closer to the young boy as she shook his hands insistently, “and I love her. Just because you and I don’t look exactly alike doesn’t mean I don’t love you, too.”

The boy shuffled awkwardly on the couch as the redhead sighed.

“There’s—a specific reason you and Lani don’t look exactly alike—which I’ll get into when you’re older,” Anuaki replied, “but in the meantime—she’s your sister, I’m your Momma, and don’t you ever think otherwise, no matter what anyone else says.”

Kal offered a small smile as Anukai grinned, shaking his hands before placing a kiss on his forehead, even as he tried to squirm away.

“You’re stuck with me, no matter how you feel about it,” she quipped, smirking.

Kal laughed in response, prompting her grin to grow even broader.

“And Lani,” she added, “think you can deal with that?”

The boy nodded, laughing as the redhead reached forward, tickling his sides even as he tried to squirm away. Finally, when the moment calmed, and the two of them were left in a few moments of silence, Anukai sighed, meeting Kal’s gaze with raised eyebrows.

“So don’t ever feel like you don’t belong with any of us,” the redhead said quietly. “Okay?”

Kal nodded and Anukai grinned before placing another kiss on his forehead, even as he tried to protest and squirm away.

“I love you very much, and so does Mommy, and don’t you ever forget that, okay?”

Kal nodded, before the redhead finally relented, allowing him to scurry off to his own room as she sighed, resting back on her heels and rubbing at her eyes. A moment later, the sound of a throat softly clearing from nearby prompted her to glance up to find Ikrie leaning against the wall near the hallway to their bedroom.

“You heard, huh?” Anukai replied.

“I did.”

“I want to know which kids—”

“It doesn’t matter,” Ikrie interrupted, pushing off the wall and approaching the redhead as she rose to her feet. “They’re kids… they say stupid things they don’t mean all the time.”

“But, you heard him—”

“And I heard and watched you convince Kal that he belonged,” Ikrie interrupted, wrapping her arms around Anukai and letting her hands come to rest in the small of her back. “He will never, for one moment, question that you’re his Mama, and that Lani is his sister.”

“You sure?”

The dark-haired woman rolled her eyes before placing a quick kiss on the redhead’s cheek.

“Of course.”

Anukai paused for a moment before her lips pulled back in a broad grin, the expression quickly spreading to Ikrie, as well.

“I know it may be tough for Kal, at this age,” the dark-haired woman said, “but you and me—with those two—we can handle it.”

The redhead sighed, leaning her head forward so her chin rested on Ikrie’s shoulder.

“I don’t worry about us, but…  _ them _ …”

Ikrie’s grip around the redhead tightened as her hands also slid up her back, coming to rest in a better position to hold the redhead tightly against the dark-haired woman.

“I know, and I love that you do.”

Anukai found herself grinning as she adjusted her position, burying her face in the crook of Ikrie’s neck for a few moments before planting a soft kiss on her exposed skin and pulling away. As she did, she found the dark-haired woman staring back at her with a strange, almost distant expression, even as the grin remained plastered to her face.

“What?”

“Just… thinking.”

“About…?”

“About how when we left the Sheers for the Cut… I… I hoped maybe we’d—maybe you’d—”

Ikrie paused for a moment, clearing her throat before continuing.

“I didn’t imagine  _ this _ , but… I’m… I’m so happy that—”

Anukai suddenly leaned in, placing a several second-long, passionate kiss against Ikrie’s partially open lips. When she finally pulled away, she raised one hand, running it through the loose portions of Ikrie’s tied-back hairstyle.

“Me too,” the redhead whispered, prompting Ikrie to grin uncontrollably.


	17. Kids Say the Damnedest Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost
> 
> (A/N: yes, grammar in the dialogue is intentional)

“Mama!”

Anukai turned from the small stove in the apartment kitchenette to find Lani stomping across the living space, her small fists balled at her sides as she stared up at her mother.

“Mama!”

“What, Lani?” she replied, smirking.

“Kal’s being a asshole!”

The smirk instantly disappeared as the older redhead’s eyes widened, her task of making dinner quickly forgotten as she turned to her daughter.

“What?!”

“He’s a asshole! Like Auntie Ara says!”

Anukai’s jaw clenched as she knelt down before the small redhead, her expression almost entirely a polar opposite to what it had been mere moments ago.

“Does she now…?”

“He won’t give me a turn with the Focus!”

The older redhead sighed, placing her hands on her daughter’s shoulders as she met her eyes directly.

“He’s barely had a turn, and it’ll be yours after.”

“But—!”

Anukai raised her eyebrows, prompting the four year old to huff indignantly, but remain silent.

“Now… did Auntie Ara tell you what that word means?” she pressed.

“It’s what you call someone when they’re being mean,” Lani said, her tone still matching the pout on her face, “but you still love them.”

Anukai opened her mouth to reply before suddenly pausing, the child’s words beginning to truly sink in for several moments. Finally, she cleared her throat, shifting her position and sliding her hands to Lani’s upper arms, squeezing them gently.

“That… that’s what Ara told you?”

The small redhead shrugged, not meeting her mother’s eyes.

“She said the mean part,” she replied, “but she said it about Miss Vansa.”

Anukai remained silent for another moment or two, her lips pulled tightly to one corner of her mouth before she sighed, running her hands up and down Lani’s arms.

“Not everyone thinks it means the same thing,” she said. “To most people it’s a bad word. Just… please don’t use it, even if Auntie Ara does.”

The young redhead nodded as Anukai offered a small smile before leaning forward and pressing a kiss against her forehead.

“Also, give Kal until dinner, and then the Focus is all yours after.”

Lani pouted for a moment as the older redhead raised her eyebrows, but the little girl finally relented, nodding and agreeing to wait. With a smirk, Anukai turned back to the stove, making sure that the food hadn’t entirely burned, before glancing back to find the small redhead leaning against the cabinets behind her.

“Hey, Lani.”

The girl looked up at her expectantly as the older redhead nodded toward the stove.

“What’s Nana say goes best in the red sauce with pasta?”

The little redhead appeared to think about her response for a few moments before looking back up at her curiously.

“Regano?”

“Sure,” Anukai replied, smirking as she grabbed some of the ground herb and tossing it into the pan, “but what does she  _ really _ like?”

The little redhead thought even harder for several moments before her eyes widened and she straightened up.

“Spicy red!”

Anukai smirked but nodded, grabbing some of the crushed and dried pepper in a glass vial and sprinkling it into the sauce.

“Nana really likes red!”

The older redhead snorted uncontrollably before covering her face with one hand and taking a deep breath.

“Are you okay, Mama?”

“Fine, Lani,” she sighed. “I’m fine.”

With almost impeccable timing, a loud knock came from the front door of the apartment just as Anukai had finished draining the pasta over a wire mesh in the sink. Glancing over her shoulder, she found Lani already rushing toward the wooden portal.

“Lani! What did I tell you?”

The small redhead stopped at the door, hand on the knob before taking a deep breath.

“Who is it?”

“It is Aunt Ara, the brilliant, attractive, and incredibly smart sister of your fine mother, Miss Talanah.”

Anukai rolled her eyes but nodded as Lani quickly yanked the door open, rushing in with her arms open as the older redhead on the other side of the door quickly knelt down, returning the embrace.

“I’m glad I was allowed to enter,” Ara quipped.

“Of course, Auntie!”

With a groan, Ara attempted to lift the small redhead, managing to just reach a standing position before lowering her to the ground, once again, with a sigh.

“You’re getting too big,” she said. “You’re going to have to lift me, soon.”

Lani giggled and shook her head as Ara ushered her farther into the living space, pushing the door closed behind her.

“Already not able to lift her?” Anukai teased, bringing the bowl of steaming pasta to the table and placing it in the center. “Maybe you need to train with Ash some more.”

“Oh?” the other woman shot back, raising her eyebrows. “What about you,  _ Mama _ ?”

With a smirk, Anukai crouched down, holding out her arms as Lani hurried over to her. The redhead quickly wrapped her daughter in them before lifting her into the air with minimal effort, but groaning for dramatic effect. As she hoisted Lani in her grip so that she was looking over the top of her head, she caught the briefest glimpse of an impressed expression from Ara before the other redhead hid it behind a roll of her eyes.

“Okay, okay,” Ara sighed.

“Mama’s strong!” Lani cheered, wrapping her arms around the top of Anukai’s head and obscuring the older redhead’s vision with her tunic.

A few moments later, she had lowered the small redhead to the floor, Lani quickly scampering to her seat at the table and climbing into it. Just as she did, Ikrie appeared from the hallway to the bedrooms, leading an excitedly talkative Kal from behind with her hands gently pushing at the back of his shoulders. As soon as he saw Ara, however, he stopped mid-sentence and ran toward her.

Ara scooped him into a tight embrace, as well, as Ikrie smirked, approaching Anukai and glancing back at their son as he seemed to restart his speech at twice the speed he had been talking earlier.

“Little traitor,” Anukai whispered.

“Traitor?” Ikrie shot back, raising one eyebrow. “I knew what I was doing before Ara got here.”

The dark-haired woman winked as the redhead rolled her eyes, but pressed a quick kiss against her. As the couple finished setting the table, Ara finally coerced Kal into his chair before taking a seat at the head of the table. As Anukai and Ikrie finally took their seats, Kal seemed to just finish his tale, prompting Ara to nod and adopt an impressed expression.

“All that from today?”

The dark-haired boy nodded as Ara grinned.

“You keep going like that, and your brain is going to be bigger than your head.”

Kal’s eyes widened for a moment as Ikrie sighed.

“She’s kidding, Kallik.”

He seemed to sigh in relief as the dark-haired woman shot Ara a glance, prompting the redhead to grin sheepishly. After a few moments, the children fell silent as they tore into their food, leaving the adults a chance to take a breath, although Anukai noted how the other redhead’s eyes widened for a moment at the first taste of the sauce.

“Something wrong, Ara?”

The other woman coughed, placing her hand over her mouth for a moment before shaking her head and swallowing.

“No, nothing, just… you, uh… made the Talanah special… huh?”

Anukai smirked as she took another mouthful of pasta, prompting the other redhead to sigh and wipe at her forehead before continuing with her dinner. When they had all finished, the couple began to clear the plates, returning them to the kitchenette.

“Lani, Kal, make sure your rooms are clean for the night,” the redhead called over her shoulder.

“Already did!” Lani replied.

“What? No you didn’t!” Kal shot back.

“Stop being a asshole!”

“Lani!”

The small redhead cringed as her mother turned from the sink, folding her arms over her chest.

“What did I tell you just before dinner?”

Her daughter muttered an apology before quietly slipping away from the table, heading toward her room with her head hung. Anukai sighed, shaking her head as she shot a disapproving look toward Ara, who reacted similarly to the smaller redhead, avoiding her gaze. Slowly, Kal also slid from his chair and made his way toward the bedrooms, leaving the three adults in momentary silence.

Anukai inhaled slowly through her nose, glancing over at Ikrie to find the dark-haired woman staring back at her with a sympathetic expression. The redhead closed her eyes for a moment before she felt her wife place a hand on her folded arms, her thumb rubbing gently across her forearm before Anukai finally opened her eyes, once again. Ikrie nodded toward the table before turning back to the sink, beginning to wash the dishes as the redhead made her way toward Ara.

As she slid into one of the seats nearest her, the other redhead glanced up at her, sighing and reaching up to rub at her eyes.

“I’m sorry, Anukai,” she muttered.

“Ara, I… I’m not mad… necessarily,” she said slowly. “I… Lani did suddenly start saying that today, but…”

Anukai trailed off before sighing heavily, folding her hands on the table before her.

“Just… please watch what you say in front of her, for now?”

The other redhead nodded, prompting Anukai to reach across the table, placing her hand on the inside of her elbow, squeezing it gently. Ara lowered her hands from her face, staring back at her as she offered a small smile, nodding.

“Sure thing.”

After another moment or two, Anukai gave her arm one last squeeze before pulling her hand back, bracing both of them on the edge of the table.

“Better hurry,” she called, “Auntie Ara’s going to eat your dessert without you!”

Suddenly, the sounds of frantic scrambling and footsteps echoed from the hallway beside the living space, prompting both redheads to grin as they rose to their feet. Seconds later, the two children tore into the room, skidding to a halt halfway across the living space when they found Ara just rising to her feet.

“Mama!” Lani whined.

“Got your butt to move, didn’t it?” Anukai shot back, smirking. “Besides, Auntie would if you took too long, I’m sure.”

Ara rolled her eyes but remained silent as Anukai made her way back into the kitchenette, opening the metal chillbox before removing a small, wooden container from within. After placing it on the counter and sliding the top back, she pulled a small, red bag from within it and untied the top. Both children began to move toward her before pausing and glancing between the two older redheads. Ara smirked and nodded toward their mother, prompting them to hurry forward and stop beside her, holding their hands cupped before them.

Anukai carefully placed a single, chocolate-covered strawberry in each of their hands as they both let out cries of excitement and began to bite into them. Before any of the adults had a chance to take their own, the children had finished their dessert, prompting Lani to approach the redhead, once again and tug at the side of her silk leggings.

“S’my turn with the Focus now, right?”

The older redhead nodded, glancing toward Kal to see him frowning slightly, but he quickly tried to hide it when he caught her gaze.

“You had it before dinner, it’s Lani’s turn after,” she said.

The small redhead let out a triumphant cry before scurrying off to the hallway, once again, although her brother remained. Anukai’s face creased in concern as she turned to him, stepping forward and taking a knee.

“What’s wrong, Kal?”

“Nothing wrong,” he replied, shaking his head. “Just… you’ll be back in the morning, right?”

Anukai’s face cracked into a smile as she nodded, reaching to brush some of his shaggy, dark hair from his forehead.

“Mommy and I will be back just after first light,” she said, nodding.

The boy nodded, but the nervous wringing of his hands told her that the words hadn’t fully soothed him.

“Auntie Ara’s gonna be here the whole time,” Anukai continued. “I’m sure she’ll let you stay up late and have all kinds of fun that I never would.”

Kal’s face finally cracked into the first hints of a grin as the redhead’s smile grew broader.

“Tell you what,” she said softly, leaning in toward him even further, “if I hear about how much fun you had… I might have to do even better than Auntie tomorrow night.”

The dark-haired boy’s face finally cracked into a full smile as he nodded, prompting Anukai to return the gesture, squeezing his shoulder before beginning to rise to her feet.

“Now, don’t terrorize your sister, and do what Auntie says, still,” she said. “Not all rules are gone.”

Kal nodded before excusing himself, hurrying toward the hallway, once again. Once he had disappeared, Anukai sighed, turning back to the other two to find them watching her with amusement.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Ara shrugged, smirking, while Ikrie continued to stare back at her with a soft smile.

Anukai approached, raising her eyebrows before she slid into place beside her mate, intentionally checking her hip into hers. Ikrie grunted softly, but didn’t move to slide away, instead wrapping one arm behind her back and keeping her close at her side.

“So… Aloy pull you out in the middle of the night?” Ara asked, reaching for one of the chocolate-dipped strawberries in the bag between them.

“At the request of Vanasha,” Anukai sighed, nodding. “Something about… rogue machines attacking a convoy north of the city.”

“Rogue?” the other redhead shot back. “Why not just ask GAIA?”

“Well, she can’t do much if they’re rogue,” she said. “All she’s said is that she doesn’t know how or why it happened.”

Ara’s lips pulled into a slight frown before she bit off the tip of the strawberry held in her fingers.

“Only expect it to be a quick out and back,” Ikrie chimed in. “Reports weren’t of any large machines. Striders, a few Scrappers… nothing else, really.”

The other redhead nodded, but the troubled expression didn’t leave her face, even as she took another bite of the fruit.

“Worried about us?”

Ara let out a short laugh, shaking her head.

“Not really,” she replied, “just… both of you?”

The couple paused, glancing toward each other as Anukai felt Ikrie’s grip tighten on her side.

“You know how we are,” she replied, turning back to the other redhead, “we come as a team, or not at all.”

Ara remained silent for a moment or two before letting out a loud, snorting laugh, which prompted Anukai to roll her eyes.

“Stop being such a child, Ara.”

The other redhead broke into actual laughter as she staggered away from the counter for a few steps, covering her mouth with one hand, until she had finally calmed down, taking several deep breaths before approaching, once again.

“I’m sorry, you just… you said that so earnestly and…”

With one last, deep breath, she seemed to calm herself enough that she finished her fruit without spitting it out or choking on it. Anukai and Ikrie each took one of the pieces of fruit for themselves before packing it back inside its container and placing it inside the metal box beside them for the night. Ara followed them down the hallway off of the living space, but turned to stand in the doorway to the room where Lani was using the Focus while Kal hung about her.

The two former Banuk made their way to their bedroom, instead, exchanging their daily, standard clothing for more protective sets of armor, complete with the modified shield weaver additions Aloy had introduced them to and Anukai had further modified. When they were both fully dressed, the redhead grabbed her bow from the storage rack on one wall of their bedroom before tossing Ikrie’s sling to her, the dark-haired woman catching it and sliding into place on her belt.

Fully armed, they made their way out of the bedroom, approaching Ara in the other doorway and coming to a stop. The other redhead glanced over at them, eying the clothing and weapons for a moment before her lips pulled into a thin line and she turned back to the children.

“Lani, Kal, we’re on our way,” Anukai called, leaning on the opposite side of the doorframe.

The small redhead quickly pulled the Focus from beside her ear, placing it on a small, wooden desk before rushing toward her, along with Kal. Anukai knelt just before they reached her, wrapping them both in a tight embrace for several long moments before pulling back, ruffling their hair with each hand.

“Be good, and we’ll be back in the morning,” she said.

Both children nodded, and she rose to her feet, stepping aside so Ikrie could have a turn. Once she had finished, placing a brief kiss on each of their foreheads, she rose to her feet and stepped after Anukai. They nodded to each other before Anukai turned to Ara.

“They’re all yours for the night.”

The other redhead nodded, offering a small smile before clearing her throat.

“Stay safe.”

The couple nodded before turning and making their way out of the apartment, and onto the artificially-lit streets of Meridian just after sunset.

True to Anukai’s theory to Kal earlier in the night, Ara had quickly suggested they watch one of the moving pictures she had stored on her Focus, to which both children had quickly agreed. They grew even more excited when she had produced a bag of dried and salted vegetable slices as snacks while they watched. The older redhead fell onto the couch in the living space, after having set up her Focus to project the image into the air before the far wall, a child quickly taking a seat on each side of her.

Even before the first images had appeared, she felt Lani lean against her side, the small redhead adjusting her position until she seemed comfortable and falling still. The picture was one Aloy had helped locate when Ara had asked for options for just such a night, the older redhead having guaranteed that it would be both suitable and interesting for the children.

As it continued, both Lani and Kal curiously and excitedly pointed out things in it, such as the “golden, real-animal Sawtooths” and the “laughing Scrappers”, while running the entire range between laughing, gasping, cowering, and cheering until the picture finally ended. As it did, Ara glanced to each side of her, noting that both seemed to be showing signs of drooping eyelids, prompting her to smirk.

“I think it’s bedtime, you two,” she quipped.

To her surprise, neither put up much of a fight as she led them to their rooms, making sure they had changed into their sleeping clothes before climbing into their beds. As the older redhead knelt beside Kal’s bed, he rolled onto his side to face her, blinking slowly.

“Mama and Mommy are gonna be okay… right?”

Ara paused for a moment before smiling softly, nodding as she ran her hand gently over his hair, smoothing some rogue strands back from his forehead.

“They’re two of the toughest women I know,” she said. “They’ll be just fine.”

Kal seemed to accept her response, yawning as she grinned and pat his shoulder.

“Get some sleep.”

With that, his eyes closed and he turned his head into his pillow, settling in beneath his blanket. Getting to her feet with a quiet groan, Ara made her way to Lani’s bed and knelt beside it, as well. The small redhead was lying on her back, arms wrapped around a small, stuffed toy of a Watcher that Ara remembered Anukai giving her for her first birthday.

“How’s he doing?” she asked, tapping the stuffed machine’s eye with one finger.

“He’s good,” Lani replied, adjusting her grip around it. “Mama had to fix him last week ‘cause he started to rip.”

“Oh no,” Ara replied, her eyebrows raising. “She made him all better, though, right?”

Lani nodded as the older redhead sighed.

“She’s good at that.”

The small redhead smiled before it was interrupted by a yawn a moment later.

“Get some sleep, Lani,” Ara said softly, reaching to run one hand over her hair, as well.

“You… too… Auntie…”

The older redhead nodded, running her thumb over gently over the girl’s forehead before leaning forward and placing a gentle kiss to it, as well. With that, Lani’s eyes finally closed and she seemed to settle in, as well. With both children attempting to sleep, at least, Ara made her way out of the bedroom, softly closing the door behind her before sighing and plodding toward the living space.

She barely managed to clear the bag that had held the night’s snacks from the couch before falling onto it, rubbing at her eyes, tiredly. It wasn’t the first time she had watched the children overnight at Anukai and Ikrie’s apartment, but she had long ago said it was too strange for her to sleep on their bed, even when they had insisted. Groaning, she kicked her boots off before curling her legs onto the couch, reaching for her Focus on the low table before her.

As soon as she slid it into place, a chime for an incoming call rang in her ear and she jumped. Her eyes shot open as her mind leapt to the worst ideas, imagining some kind of distress call from the couple, but instead her eyes fell on a different name, prompting her to sigh, but accept it, anyway.

“Hello,” she said dryly.

“Hello to you, too,” Vansa shot back. “You weren’t at your place, or your  _ favorite _ place, and you weren’t answering.”

“I’m at Anukai’s,” Ara said, “watching the kids. Besides, since when are you checking up on me?”

“Since last night,” the other woman answered quickly. “Ara, you looked like death—”

“But I’m fine, now,” the redhead interjected. “Okay?”

“You hadn’t looked like that since—”

“Can we not fucking do this right now?” Ara snapped, quickly clenching her jaw as she realized how loud her voice had become.

Several moments of silence followed, in which the redhead didn’t hear the sounds of small footsteps approaching, thankfully. Finally, Vansa’s voice rang in her ear, once again.

“I don’t know what you think  _ this _ is, Ara, other than concern, but fine, I can not be if you want.”

“Does Carvan know about your  _ concern _ for me?”

The redhead instantly froze as she heard the words escape her lips, but it was too late to stop them, now. Several seconds of dead silence followed, in which she began to wonder if Vansa had already hung up, but a moment later her voice came again.

“He knows what our situation is,” the other woman said, her voice low but intense, “but perhaps maybe you don’t.”

As Ara opened her mouth to retort, the call suddenly dropped and she let out a heavy sigh, instead, ripping the Focus off and moving to slam it down on the low table before thinking better and carefully placing it. The redhead adjusted her position on the couch, resting her head on one of the pillows propped against the arm before taking a slow, deep breath in and carefully exhaling it, closing her eyes as she did.

“Auntie?”

Almost immediately, she opened them once, again, her head lifting to glance toward the sound of the small voice. Even in the darkness of the living space, she could make out the faint silhouette of Lani by the chair across from her.

“You should be in bed, Lani,” she said softly.

“I heard you and…”

Ara sighed, beginning to sit up on the couch.

“I’m fine, just…”

“It sounded like someone was being a asshole to you, again.”

Ara froze in place for a moment before clearing her throat, taking a seat on the edge of the couch with her hands braced on either side of her.

“Lani, your mama told you not to use that word.”

“Sorry,” the small girl replied, moving closer to the couch. “It sounded like before…”

Ara sighed, shaking her head as the small redhead came to a stop a foot or so away from her.

“I’m so sorry you’ve had to hear both times,” the older redhead said softly. “I’m a terrible Aunt for…”

“No, not terrible,” Lani said quickly, stepping forward and placing one hand on Ara’s knee. “You’re great.”

The older redhead laughed softly, shaking her head as she placed one hand over the girl’s, gently running her thumb over her small knuckles.

“Thanks, Lani.”

Just as Ara began to rise from the couch, the girl grabbed her arm, tugging it back down. The redhead paused, settling back into her seat as Lani began to climb onto it, beside her.

“Lani…”

“I’ll sleep with you.”

“Lani, you’ve got your nice, comfortable bed…”

“When I feel bad, Mama lets me sleep with her, and I feel better,” the small redhead replied. “I’ll do the same for you.”

Ara paused for a moment before her face broke into a smile, the beginnings of hot tears forming in the corners of her eyes as she nodded, clearing her throat.

“Okay.”

With that, Ara carefully adjusted their position until she had stretched out on the couch, once again, pressing herself against the back of the cushion as much as she was able to allow Lani room to lie in front of her. Almost immediately, the small redhead curled into place against her, burying her face into Ara’s chest. The older redhead froze for a moment before she swallowed heavily, carefully reaching behind her to pull the blanket laid across the back of the couch over them, settling it so it covered her legs while also leaving most of Lani’s head exposed. Once the blanket was in place, she carefully wrapped her arm over the girl, reaching her hand up to gently stroke at her auburn locks, prompting her to shift her position slightly.

“Just because someone is a asshole, doesn’t mean you can’t love them, right Auntie?” the girl mumbled.

Ara’s hand paused mid-stroke over her hair before a small, sad smile tugged at her lips and she nodded, sighing.

“Right, Lani… that’s right.”

After several long moments, the small redhead seemed to have fallen asleep, once again, although it continued to elude Ara, even as it tugged at the edges of her consciousness. A warm feeling had spread throughout her chest, not solely due to the small child now pressed tightly against it, however. Her fingers slowly trailed over Lani’s hair one last time before she carefully leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to the crown of her head.

“G’night, Lani…”

With that, the older redhead finally gave in to sleep, resting her head on the pillow against the arm of the couch and closing her eyes.


	18. Nightmares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by imagine0314

She can still _see_ it. Still _feel_ it, all these years later.

The itch of a scabbing wound along the side of her head, the screams coming from her sister’s mate in the cell next to hers. 

The redhead stirs in her bed, the night already deep and dark, fingertips digging into the sheets as the memory overtakes her.

A loud _crack_ and the sickening wet gurgle to follow. She can still smell the metallic tang of blood in the air, even now, even _here_ , where she should feel safe. 

_BANG._

Suddenly there’s a sharp, searing pain shooting through her side. She can feel the hot throb just above her hip, her shirt and pants soaking darker and darker with each heartbeat. She grits her teeth. 

This _will not_ be the end. This _cannot_ be the end. She thinks of her mate. He’s waiting for her back home. She has to get back home.

A whimper escapes her sleeping form, breath coming faster and faster while she groans out a sound that seems halfway between agony and grief.

She’s out of her cell, face to face with the woman who bears her face and her dark-haired mate, each of them bloodied and bearing the marks of their escape. Her mirror is coated in thick, dark liquid, her metallic left arm now exposed. 

She turns. They have to leave. Have to get the older redhead’s mate. Have to get out, _now,_ but suddenly everyone is gone. 

This is wrong. She _knows_ this is wrong.

This isn’t how it happened. 

The redhead searches frantically for the others, spinning on her heel and trying to ignore the pulsing in her side and the hot, slick feeling it leaves when she sees _him._

Small and innocent, his strawberry-blonde hair cropped short, his green-gold eyes a match for her own. He looks up at her, his gaze wide and horrified. How did he get here? He’s not supposed to be here, he’s not supposed to see _this_.

The boy grabs for the hem of her shirt, insistent and scared.  
  
“It hurts!” he cries.

She kneels down to meet him at eye level before seeing that his wounds match her own: the scrape on his head, the bruises littering his body, the…

 _Oh, no._  
  
His shirt is soaked through with a sick, sticky red and getting wetter with each passing second.  
  
“Mother, it hurts,” he says again, his voice quieter and more resigned, the color drained from his face. “Why did you make it hurt?”

The small boy crumples into her arms as she struggles to press her palm to the hole in his side.  
  
“Elias? You must stay awake, little one. Elias? _Elias!_ ”

\------

She wakes, her own cries caught in her throat, heart pounding against her ribs, a cold chill rippling through her core.

A dream. A memory. That’s all. She’s here. She’s in Meridian. She’s _safe._

So why can she still hear his screams?

Before Ashana puts it into thought, she’s on her feet and sprinting down the hallway of their rented apartment before bursting into the boy’s room, slamming on the lightswitch to find him sitting upright on his bed with his knees tucked to his chest and crying heavily. But he’s here. 

He’s alive.

She feels herself swallow back the bile that had risen in her throat, her pulse finally beginning to slow. Ashana clenches her jaw, attempting to compose herself before addressing her son. It will do him no good to see her weak. 

“Elias, what is wrong?” she asks, taking a seat on the bed by his side, her hand resting on his back. She can feel soft sobs escaping him, a lump already forming in her throat.

He doesn’t answer, but instead leaps forward into her arms, grasping at her like she might disappear at any second. It’s uncharacteristic of him. Such displays are not common in the tribe--not _wrong,_ exactly, though neither is it encouraged. Surely she hasn’t instilled this behavior, and she knows his father hasn’t, either.

“You were hurt,” he cries, large, slow tears streaking his reddened face.

“Hurt?” she asks, quietly, tentatively. “I am fine, little one. You can see this.”  
  
“But I _saw_ it,” Elias insists. “In...in the place.”  
  
“What place?” she asks, letting him crawl into her arms. Her fingers card through his hair while he presses his face deeper against her chest. 

“The one we go to together,” he says. “The head place. The one where I see you.”

Ashana’s lip quivers. She knows. She’s always _known_ .  
  
“I saw you get hurt,” Elias reiterates quietly, fresh tears wetting the redhead’s shirt. “It felt real. And I am not sure...but I think I saw Aunt Anukai and Aunt Ikrie hurt too.”

Ashana’s stomach drops. She never meant for this to happen. Never wanted him to _see_ . The lump in her throat grows bigger, choking the words from her despite the reassurance she wants to give.  
  
“I am sorry, Elias. I...I had hoped…”

“Did it really happen?”

The redhead nods into his little body, her grip on him tightening. Her eyes redden and she swallows thickly. 

“It did. Many years ago. Long before you came into the world.”  
  
The boy’s small hand wraps to his mother’s side, brushing against the scar through her clothing.  
  
“Does it still hurt?” 

Ashana shakes her head. 

“No, little one. Your aunts helped heal me once we left that place.”  
  
He sighs, clutching her steadfastly, and the redhead finds she doesn’t mind.  
  
“It was so scary, Mother. Why did you show it to me?”

She feels tears spring to her eyes at the realization that her son believes she did this _intentionally_. She would never. She _will_ never.  
  
“Wha--”  
  
“The head place is nice when I see you. But this time it was not. ...I don’t want to see that one again.”

Something inside her breaks, soft and subtle, and before she can stop it, Ashana grasps the boy close against her ribs, clutching him tightly while she rocks him back and forth. Her shoulders shake and she can only hope he will one day forgive her.

Elias looks up, peering over the edge of the redhead’s grasp.

The image of his unbreakable mother weeping burns in instantly.

\------

Ashana sits across the table from Anukai while Kal, Lani, and Elias scurry around the apartment, the sounds of their shrieks and laughter piercing the air.

The former Banuk looks at her mirror, finding a deep fatigue in her eyes. 

“You look tired, Ash.”  
  
“We did not sleep well last night.”

Anukai nods. 

“The heat’s hard to get used to, especially in the summer.”  
  
“No,” Ashana says slowly, her accent stilting the words further, “it was not the heat. It..it was…something else.”

Anukai leans forward, concern creasing her brow.

“You okay?”

Ashana swallows and looks away, her long, loose red hair swaying with the movement. 

“I...I need to--may I ask you something?”  
  
“Anything.”  
  
“You know of the _place_ , the connection we share. Does...does Lani have it as well?”

The former Banuk’s eyes soften, pressing her lips thin. 

“Yeah, yeah she does. Though I don’t think it’s quite as clear as ours. I think she feels me, mostly. The rest of you...sometimes.”  
  
“How long have you known?”  
  
Anukai sighs softly. 

“I knew before I even held her in my arms. It’s hard to explain, but...I felt it. Is it the same for you and Elias?”

Ashana bites her lip, a tell so small to most, but gigantic compared to her usual stony facade.  
  
“I...yes. I knew while he still grew within me. I...had hoped I could shield him from some of it. How have you...kept things from her?”  
  
“From Lani?”

Ashana nods, her expression pleading for some solution. 

“I’m...well, I’m not sure I can,” Anukai says softly. “I do my best but...I’m not sure we can stop it, Ash. It’s always been kind of a blessing and a curse and I don’t think we get to choose which parts of it we get. Did...did something happen?”

“Last night...he...he saw the Port and I could not stop it,” Ashana admits, a shudder running down her spine. The guilt still sits heavy in her stomach, her whole body uneasy.  
  
Anukai shifts, her eyes glancing toward the three children playing across the room.

“Has Lani seen...this?” Ashana asks, gesturing toward Anukai’s exposed metal arm.  
  
“If she has...she hasn’t said.”

Ashana sighs, casting her gaze away before looking up again.

“The world is dark and harsh and cruel as you and I both know, but even among my people, this cannot be something that would truly make him strong, to keep subjecting him to it, would it? He asked me if I had shown him intentionally and I...Anukai, I never wanted that. Never. Even with all the strength my people value, I would _never_ have chosen to show him what he saw last night.”  
  
Ashana looks visibly shaken, and finally the dark circles under her eyes make sense to the former Banuk.

“What if this makes him afraid? Will this change what he thinks of me?” Ashana blurts out, and for the first time ever, Anukai is certain she sees genuine _fear_ in the other’s eyes. 

She begins to spiral, her words coming faster before reverting to her native tongue.  
  
The braided redhead leans forward, taking Ashana’s hand in her own, the fit between them perfect, as always. Anukai’s thumb rubs against the other’s skin. 

“Ash, breathe…”

Ashana inhales deeply before letting it back out. Her eyes redden and glass, but she refuses to let them spill, swallowing back the urge.  
  
“I...is this what it is like? I have never felt such strong...affection toward another, not even my mate, and I...I do not know...I feel it has changed me.”  
  
Anukai smirks. 

“You love your son--”

“Of course I do--” Ashana cuts in.

“--And there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s okay to embrace it, even.”

“I-I...ran to his room and held him when he woke, screaming. I _cried_ , Anukai, in front of him! It is not acceptable for him to see his mother as weak as he did last night. My people would never--”  
  
“Ash, what he saw last night was his mother stopping at nothing to get to him when he was scared. He saw you come to his aid when he needed you and you _protected_ him. That’s not weakness, that’s strength,” Anukai says, pausing for a moment to look over again at Lani and Kal. “Took me a long time to see that, too.” 

Anukai’s grip on Ashana tightens. 

“You are the _strongest_ person I know, Ash.”

The other redhead blinks away the remaining redness in her eyes, grinning as she looks over Anukai’s shoulder at the three children playing in the distance.  
  
“Promise?”

“I swear it.”  
  
“Thank you, _sister_ ,” Ashana says, allowing herself a brief smile.

“Of course,” the former Banuk insists. “What we have...this connection...there’s no easy way to navigate it. There is no map to follow. We do our best and you are not alone in it.”

Ashana nods slowly, accepting the answer even if it isn’t the one she might have hoped for.  
  
“Oh, and one more thing,” the other redhead adds, her face taking on its usual seriousness.  
  
“Hm?”  
  
“Do not speak a word of my crying to Ara.”

Anukai laughs, the sound light and easy. 

“I promise.”


	19. Stay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by imagine0314

Vansa tossed and turned in the bedsheets, mulling over the fight from earlier in the day. Carvan’s words to her had been echoing in her head for hours now, two halves of her warring with guilt.  
  
Still, though, she’d thought that maybe, _just_ maybe, he had understood. For a while, it seemed like he had. She’d told him about her history with Ara early on--she was a friend of the family--bumping into each other was a guarantee. But as the months had worn on, every late night bar rescue, every gathering, every glance had slowly become too much.  
  
The brunette slowly recounted the argument to herself. The Oseram man had finally confronted her, demanding she cut Ara out completely, and in no uncertain terms if she was to remain with him.  
  
She sighed, her hesitation to agree had angered him, and she wasn’t even sure if he was in the wrong for it. Carvan had been the first man in a long time to be anything more than a fleeting interest--she’d never had to bother explaining her complicated past to anyone before. Maybe she’d wanted too much--trying to play both sides without consequences, she thought to herself.  
  
Vansa pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration, desperate to fall asleep and forget her terrible day, but no matter how she tried to push the thoughts back, Ara kept creeping back in, a presence even when the healer woman hadn’t seen her in so long.  
  
Why? Why was this so hard? It should have been an easy choice. Being with Ara was always trouble, she knew that. 

She’d known it since she and her father had found a teenaged Ara starving and pregnant on the streets of Reva. She’d known it that horrific night she’d helped Ara take the tea, knew it when they had first gotten together, when they had left the city, and when the redhead had finally pushed her away. She’d known it when they’d found the bunker in the desert and when she’d finally arrived in Meridian some months after Ara herself. She knew it still every time she pulled the other woman out of a blacked-out stupor, or held her hair while she was sick, and every time since when they’d shared regret-filled nights of intimacy that dotted the years.

Well, perhaps that wasn’t _quite_ true, she realized, as she recalled their various encounters over the last decade or so. There _had_ been good times and Vansa found herself eagerly remembering one that stood out in particular. She blinked heavily, knowing there was no way sleep would come easily now. Instead she settled, relishing in the feeling of a good memory.

\------

_“She didn’t even ask me to stay.”_

Vansa mused to herself as she walked down the quiet, late night streets of Meridian, her boots occasionally scuffing against the cobblestone path. Her steps wavered ever so slightly--a side effect of her night at the pub with Ara. She shoved her hands in her pockets, thinking back on the last several hours with a sigh.

She’d agreed to meet with the redhead, half out of morbid curiosity and half due to her inability to ever fully let the other woman exit her life. The two seemed inextricably tied to each other no matter how often they fought or how long they could go without speaking. Something always drew them back, always drew them together--even when she did her best to resist. Vansa had expected to see Ara halfway to puking her guts out and miserable, like usual. And for the first time, she’d been dead wrong.

In the nearly twelve years they’d known each other, Vansa had never seen Ara happier. 

The redhead had been jubilant, unable to contain her utter adoration for her new niece. Vansa had watched as Ara had thrown her head back with laughter and wiped at eyes reddened with joyful tears, every word that spilled forth was about Lani and Anukai.  
  
She was fairly certain she’d never seen Ara so in love with anything or anyone--herself included.

A small smile crossed Vansa’s lips at the image. She’d never seen Ara so carefree, so at ease. It was a good look, she had to admit. And while so many of their drunken nights together had ended in hate-fueled escapades and mornings full of regret, this one had concluded with a surprisingly amicable--even friendly--parting.

The healer woman looked up to find that she had somehow already reached her shop, unsure of exactly how she’d gotten there. The small smile remained on her lips while she fished her key out of her pocket, her hand fumbling ever so slightly at the lock.  
  
The space was dark, though by now she knew the layout by touch, carefully avoiding the pitfalls of running into any of her equipment or containers of herbs. She dragged her hand along the wall, feeling for the edge that would lead to the stairs. As she climbed her way to the second floor, Vansa was suddenly struck by the realization that she was _definitely_ less sober than she’d hoped.  
  
The brunette fumbled once again with the key to the apartment above, making her way in after several minutes of failed attempts. Vansa entered her home, kicking off her boots as soon as she was past the entry, stripping off her jacket in the hallway and placing it on a hook. By the time she reached her bathroom, she had nearly removed the rest of her clothing, taking a moment to wash her face and clean up for the night.

She looked at her reflection in the mirror, and for just a moment found herself wishing she could see the redhead alongside her.  
  
“Nothin’ but trouble,” Vansa slurred to herself. “Fuck.”

She trudged over to her bed, flopping down on top of the covers unceremoniously. She laid on her back, staring up at the ceiling, tired but unable to immediately sleep. She felt like something was missing, and despite her best efforts, Vansa found her mind drifting back to Ara once again.  
  
“You fucking idiot,” she muttered aloud, mortified at the errant thought.  
  
It had been more than a decade since they’d broken it off, but those two intense years together in Reva had seemed to leave their mark. No matter how long they’d spent ignoring each other, every so often they found their way back, the pull inevitable, like a law of the universe. It had been over a year since Vansa had last given in to Ara’s pleading looks and heated kisses, the two of them stumbling back to the redhead’s apartment with rough, needy motions.

The brunette rolled to her side, realizing she’d been biting her lip. She ignored the coiled feeling low in her belly and took a deep breath, trying to shove her memories aside. Being with Ara never worked out well, she should have known that by now. Every morning after had been a fight, or at best, an awkward and stilted goodbye. 

She knew. 

She _knew._

Still, she couldn’t help but think of the redhead, the other woman’s lean frame pressed into her own, Ara’s thigh slipping right between--  
  
 _“She didn’t even ask me to stay,”_ Vansa thought, shaking her head.  
  
The healer woman blinked heavily, ruefully slipping under the covers. It was for the best, after all.

She’d never seen Ara so in love with anything or anyone as she had that night.

_Herself included._

\------

The next few days slipped by without event, patients coming and going from her shop with their usual flow. She leaned over her counter, grinding a mix of Gray Omen and Freezerime root with a mortar and pestle, adding to it a freshly imported antibiotic mix shipped in from the Port.  
  
Vansa glanced at the door as she worked, unsure of exactly who or what she was looking for, though the needling suspicion it was a certain redhead kept creeping into the back of her mind. The healer blinked heavily, trying to clear away the feeling. She hadn’t slept well the last few nights--overthinking herself into a spiral only to be faced with the realization that she woke each morning alone. Vansa still hadn’t decided if it was a good or a bad thing.  
  
She pictured Ara, smiling wide in celebration, eyes bleary but full of hope. It had looked good on her.  
  
Looked _too good_ on her.

The healer finished grinding the mixture, pausing to pour the contents into a funnel and begin filling several capsules, her hands working methodically. Soon, she heard a knock at the door.  
  
“Come in,” she called, continuing to work without looking up.  
  
A flash of red caught her eye and Vansa’s heart leapt into her throat, a swell of excitement filling her as she looked up. The brunette paused, examining the sight before her only to deflate slightly as she realized it was one of her regulars--an Oseram woman named Tera--wearing a bright head covering.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you,” the Oseram began.  
  
“No, not your fault,” Vansa said quickly. “Come in, come in. Just give me a minute to finish filling these, all right?”  
  
“No rush,” Tera said, pausing for a moment before adding, “You all right, Vansa? You look...distracted.”  
  
“Yeah,” the brunette nodded, sealing the last capsule. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just haven’t slept well. It’s nothing.”

Vansa quickly reached behind her, procuring the woman’s usual prescription, and handing it over the counter to outstretched hands.  
  
“You sure?” Tera asked one last time.  
  
“Really,” Vansa replied. “Thanks. And that’s a month’s supply, like usual. So...see you in four weeks?”  
  
“Be seeing you,” the Oseram nodded, finally leaving the cluttered shop.

Once the woman was out of sight, Vansa sighed, her shoulders finally relaxing.  
  
“Fuck,” Vansa seethed through her teeth.

She quickly strode over to the door, locking it for the evening with a mounting anxiety. The healer shook her head. 

Stupid. She was _so_ stupid to get her hopes up. It was good that it hadn’t been Ara. She was sure of it.

Still, Vansa sighed deeply. It was going to be a long, lonely night. 

She was sure of _that_ , too.  
  
\------

The next evening, Vansa found herself on the streets of Meridian once more. It had been a week since her last brush with a _certain_ _redhead_ , and she found herself still in need of a distraction.  
  
She had locked the door to her shop behind her and began meandering along the familiar pathways, the sunset turning a brilliant shade of pink-purple that bathed the city in its light. The healer mindlessly pushed up the sleeves of her brown jacket, exposing her forearms to the cool twilight air. Vansa rounded the corner, finding her favorite spot along the edge of the mesa and leaned forward, arms on the stone railing while she took in the brilliant colors fading out of the sky.  
  
It was nice to get out and get her head clear, she decided, finally turning and beginning to walk again without any destination in mind. The healer kept walking, looking down at her feet when she heard it.  
  
“Van?”

The brunette’s head perked up. There was only one person who called her by the nickname in this city.  
  
“Van! Hey…” Ara began, walking over quickly.

It was only then that Vansa realized she’d meandered relatively close to Anukai’s apartment, though whether by accident or subconscious decision, she couldn’t be sure.  
  
“Someone’s in a good mood,” Vansa remarked with a smirk.  
  
“Hasn’t really left all week,” Ara admitted, her hand rubbing against the shaved side of her head. She sported an ivory sleeveless top, a heavy bone pendant sitting in the middle of her chest hanging by a cord.  
  
“You coming from your sister’s place?”  
  
“Yeah, actually. How’d you know?”

“Because I know what love looks like on you...and you are head over heels for those kids,” Vansa said, a smile slowly spreading across her face as she watched Ara’s expression. “Especially Lani.”

Ara blushed hard and looked down at her feet, kicking at the dirt. “It’s...there’s no competition…”  
  
“No, but I get it,” Vansa assured, heart thundering in her ears. “She’s...it’s different when she’s...you and Anukai are--”

“Yeah,” Ara agreed. “She...she looks just like us. Well, not _just_ like us, but you know what I mean. And she just...makes me think a lot about...I don’t know, I just...I feel _good_ when I’m around her, you know?”

“I know,” Vansa replied. “You seem...different. Better. I _like_ this Ara.”  
  
The redhead’s blush deepened. “You _do?_ Well...uh, I mean, the kids...Anukai...they just...give me something to really work for. Being with them just feels like--I don’t know--home, now, I guess...or something like it. Shit, sorry, I know I’m rambling…”  
  
The brunette tried hard to hide her mixed expression. After all these years, she was glad to see Ara had finally found some semblance of _home_ , though she found herself swallowing hard at the realization that she hadn’t ever been able to provide it.  
  
“So where are you off to?” the healer asked.  
  
“Oh, uh, just home, I guess,” Ara said quietly. “Trying not to go out drinking as often anymore. I was with my um... _sister_ and the kids all day helping out. Two infants is...well, it’s a lot. I’m lucky Lani seems to like me so I was able to free up Anukai whenever she wasn’t feeding her. Ash is taking the night shift with Kal. Kid won’t seem to quiet down for anyone but her and Ikrie will take the silence however she can get it.”  
  
Vansa grinned but said nothing, letting the redhead finish.  
  
“Shit...all I’m doing is talking about the kids again, aren’t I?”  
  
“It’s fine, Ara. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so excited,” Vansa said, placing a hand on the other woman’s upper arm, an electric current running through them both at her touch.  
  
The redhead smirked, letting her eyes linger on Vansa’s own before she quickly looked away again.  
  
“Hey, I know we don’t usually...uh...but, you have any dinner plans?” Ara asked. “I’m starving.”

Vansa chuckled to herself, shoving her hands in her pockets, “Yeah, I do.”

“Oh…” Ara responded dejectedly, her face falling.  
  
“With you, idiot. You’re buying.”  
  
“I can do that,” the redhead replied, her face once again brightening.  
  
Vansa smirked, seeing Ara happy would be her undoing, she was sure.  
  
\------

The two women sat in Ara’s living room, containers of food spread across the low table in front of the couch. The redhead hadn’t been exaggerating and had ordered several options from her favorite Carja stall, the aromatic scents of the spices hanging heavily in the air.  
  
They ate, trading cartons back and forth easily, each picking a little from the other’s choices.  
  
After several minutes, Vansa paused, chewing thoughtfully. She swallowed, closing her eyes at the taste. “Oh, that’s good.”  
  
“That’s why they’re my favorite,” Ara said, downing another spoonful.  
  
“You know I don’t think we’ve had an actual sit-down meal together since--”  
  
“--Probably Anukai and Ikrie’s wedding,” Ara finished. “Been a long time.”  
  
“Yeah,” Vansa sighed, taking another bite. “Sure has.”

The redhead scooted over slightly, letting her knee meet Vansa’s, testing the waters ever so slightly to see if the healer would recoil at her touch. When she didn’t, Ara visibly relaxed, leaning in more to steal a piece of food from Vansa’s plate, their arms brushing against each other.  
  
“Hey!” Vansa protested.  
  
“Pretty sure I remember laying down the shards for all this,” Ara teased.  
  
“Yeah, yeah. Go on, you can eat it,” Vansa said, adjusting her legs to swing over Ara’s.  
  
The redhead blushed hard before smirking and raising her eyebrows. “That an offer?”  
  
Vansa looked at her in confusion before pausing and rolling her eyes. “See? I knew that I hated you, after all.”

“That’s not a no,”  
  
“It isn’t a yes, either.”  
  
“Maybe I could convince you,” Ara teased, offering her a hooded glance.  
  
Vansa crossed her arms and shot the other woman a dirty look, though she didn’t say anything--now far too distracted by the scenes running through her head.

Ara placed the container of food down on the table, letting her hand now rest on Vansa’s thigh. She rubbed softly, teasing her way up without resistance before looking up and meeting the other woman’s eyes.  
  
The redhead looked at Vansa for permission and found no objection, the other woman’s expression nearly daring her to go further. Ara took the invitation, beginning to explore at the apex of the healer’s thighs through her clothing.  
  
Vansa arched into the touch before taking one last bite of her food and setting the container down as well. “First she buys me dinner and now this? Careful, you might spoil me.”  
  
“I was always good at spoiling you,” Ara said, her voice lower and full of want.  
  
“Can’t deny that,” Vansa admitted, pausing before adding, “Been...thinking of you lately.”  
  
“Yeah?” Ara asked quietly, her hands working at the clasp of Vansa’s pants.  
  
“Yeah,” the other woman breathed. 

What was she doing? How many times had they done this over the years only to wake up with regret? Still, Vansa couldn’t convince herself to stop. Something was different about Ara and she wanted to see if she could grasp it for herself. Maybe even see it from the inside out.  
  
“Well, I’m here now,” Ara said, breaking Vansa from her thoughts. “...Could put me to good use.”

The redhead slipped off the other woman’s pants and jacket, leaving her in just her shirt and underwear. Already, Ara was leaning over her and nipping at her throat, leaving her hand between Vansa’s legs.  
  
The healer pressed Ara into a kiss that deepened the longer they held it and Vansa tugged off Ara’s leggings, gasping with delight when the redhead used the opportunity to slide her knee in where her hand had been. 

Ara moved against her just the way Vansa had imagined a week prior, each small, rocking motion only serving to urge them both on. The redhead panted against her skin, causing it to prickle in response. 

The brunette looked up to find familiar green-gold eyes boring into her, though instead of their usual drunken glass, they were clear and sober. Something about this time felt more genuine than it had in years, more gentle and kinder to each of them.  
  
“Stop, stop,” Vansa said suddenly, her palms pressing against the redhead’s chest.

Ara stiffened, her eyes going wide while she caught her breath, panting. “What did I…? I thought you were into it…”  
  
Vansa grinned. “I _am_ into it, if you can’t tell. But we’re not eighteen anymore and I don’t think my back can handle doing this on your couch.”  
  
Ara laughed, her cheeks flushing red. She offered her hand to the woman beneath her, the two of them tangled in each other as they made their way to the redhead’s bedroom. Ara cupped Vansa’s jaw in her hand, kissing her repeatedly before pulling back the blankets and easing the other woman onto her mattress.  
  
“What a gentleman,” Vansa breathed into her ear.  
  
“Always am,” Ara chuckled. “Now where were we…”

She tugged at Vansa’s remaining clothes as well as her own shirt and pendant, and Vansa noticed the redhead taking the utmost care of the small chunk of bone, placing it gently back on a shelf.  
  
“What’s that?” Vansa asked, her eyes scanning up and down the redhead’s pale silhouette.  
  
“A promise,” Ara said softly, climbing back on the bed, offering no further explanation.  
  
The redhead leaned over Vansa, once again, and began planting kisses along her skin, trailing down her throat, chest and hips until she hovered dangerously close to exactly where Vansa wanted her to be. Each one felt careful, considered, _loving_ , even.

“Just say the word,” Ara teased, her breath hot between the healer’s legs.  
  
“Gonna make me beg?”  
  
“Well, a ‘please’ would be nice.”  
  
“Smartass,” Vansa huffed.  
  
“I don’t know, doesn’t sound like you want it,” Ara said, shrugging as she began to back away.  
  
Vansa reached out quickly toward the redhead’s wrist, ceasing her movement instantly when she remembered:  
  
 _Ara didn’t like to be grabbed. Didn’t like to be held like that._ _  
__  
_Instead, the brunette took a deep breath. “Please, Ara.”  
  
The redhead smirked, taking one thigh in each arm before dipping her head low. Vansa groaned appreciatively, and Ara took it as a cue to continue her pace, not daring to deviate for several minutes until she finally paused, looking up at the woman before her.  
  
“You’re sure you’re not gonna regret this in the morning?” Ara offered, knowing that if she continued, there would be no going back.  
  
Vansa looked down at her, seeing a care and a cautiousness she hadn’t felt since they were teenagers. A tight, swollen feeling filled her chest. She coaxed Ara forward, pulling her into a passionate, inelegant kiss before urging her back down. 

Her fingers carded through red hair as she gently guided Ara where she wanted her. It wouldn’t last. She knew it wouldn’t. Still, right here, right now, it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered but _her._  
  
“Don’t you dare fucking stop.”

\------  
  
It was quiet, the only sound that of ruffled clothing and the groan of the mattress. Still, it was enough to wake the redhead, her body stirring against the covers.

“You don’t have to go, Van,” Ara said, voice hoarse as her eyes cracked open. “It’s so early.”

“Oh yes I do,” Vansa countered softly. “Because if I stay I’ll start thinking this could work again.”

Early morning sun peeked through her blinds, and she could feel Vansa already sitting up on the edge of her bed, the rough movements of clothing being donned once again filling the space.

“It could,” the redhead insisted, her voice still thick with sleep.

“Not in this life,” Vansa chuckled gently.

Ara propped herself up on her elbow, causing the sheets to fall about mid-waist, revealing her bare, freckled chest.

“Van, you know I lo—“

“Don’t,” Vansa insisted, pulling on her pants quickly.

“What?”

“Don’t say it if you don’t mean it.”

“But I do—“

Vansa paused, a genuine look of concern crossing her face. “Ara, you’re in love with a lot of people right now. And I’m glad—you should be. I can see it. Hell, I _felt_ it. But none of those people are me.”

“I…”

“It’s okay, Ara,” Vansa said quietly. “I’m not upset. I think this is the best thing that’s happened to you in a long time. I want you to enjoy it.”

The redhead bit her lip, unsure of what to say.

“Hey,” Vansa began, lifting Ara’s head up by her chin. “Thanks for last night. That was the best time we’ve had together since…well, since Reva.”

“You’re not mad about it?”

“Not mad,” Vansa confirmed, kissing the redhead on the cheek, causing Ara to blush nearly as hard as she had the night before. “Now’s just…not the time for us.”

“Will it ever be?” Ara asked sheepishly, red strands of hair hanging down in her face.

“Ask me again in twenty years,” Vansa chuckled, the last of her clothing finally buckled and secured.

“You’re such a bitch,” Ara laughed, ruffling her own hand through her wild red mane.

Vansa stood, pausing to turn before she exited the bedroom, a wide grin spreading across her face.

“You like me that way.”  
  
Ara groaned.  
  
“I hate it when you’re right.”


	20. Another/Gramma GAIA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

The AI woman came to a pause before the apartment door, one hand raised to knock, but hesitating at the last moment. She closed her eyes for a second or two before she became consciously aware of her body moving and reacting as if she were breathing, and she inhaled deeply, once, before opening her eyes again and finally rapping on the door. The sounds of commotion from inside sounded for several moments before the portal finally swung open to reveal a redhead in her mid-30s, her hair barely held in place in a loose ponytail as beads of sweat visibly dripped down the sides of her flushed cheeks.

“Oh, hey,” she said, grinning broadly. “Lost track of time, I guess.”

“It seems you have had an eventful morning,” GAIA replied, smiling in return.

“You could say that,” Anukai sighed, stepping aside and gesturing inside. “Come on, they’ll be excited to see you.”

“Oh?”

The redhead laughed.

“Of course.”

With that, the AI woman stepped through the doorway, coming to a stop just inside it. Before she had a chance to fully acquaint herself with the situation she was stepping into, the sounds of small feet scurrying across the wooden floor raced toward her and she glanced down just as the small figures ran into her.

“Gramma GAIA!” the two children shouted in unison, both sets of arms quickly wrapping about her waist.

GAIA recoiled in surprise for a moment before her grin quickly returned, her hands coming to rest on the head of dark hair to her right and auburn hair to her left, ruffling them slightly.

“Why hello, young ones,” she said.

“You’re back!” Lani said, lifting her head from where it had previously been buried against the bot woman’s stomach to stare up at her, gray hazel eyes bright to match the smile still on her face.

“Like, really back!” Kal added, also turning to look up at her with his pale, blue-silver eyes.

“Yes, it has been some time, but I felt I needed to visit—in person,” the AI woman said, nodding.

“To see us?”

“Well, but of course!” GAIA replied, smiling as she began to kneel down, the children releasing her as she did. “I am sorry it has been some time.”

“It’s okay,” Lani shrugged. “You’re here now.”

The AI woman paused for a moment before nodding slowly.

“Yes… yes I am.”

“You’re staying for a while?” Kal asked tentatively.

“While there are some other things I must give attention to while in Meridian soon,” GAIA began, placing her hands on the children’s shoulders and squeezing them gently, “today I am focused on spending time with you.”

The children both grinned broadly as GAIA glanced toward their mother behind them, finding the redhead hanging back, her arms folded over her chest as a grin remained on her lips. At the AI woman’s glance, she cleared her throat, stepping up behind the children and placing her hands on their heads, prompting them to glance up at her.

“Before you go on an amazing adventure with Gramma,” she began, “you’ll need to get cleaned up.”

Both children pouted, letting out sounds of disappointment as Anukai rolled her eyes.

“Not a full bath, but clean clothes, scrub at your faces, brush your teeth, and then come on back out here.”

Kal and Lani nodded before quickly darting away as soon as their mother had released them, both disappearing into the short hallway to their rooms.

“So, you have any plans for today?” she asked.

GAIA shrugged, rising to a standing position, once again.

“Some. I was waiting to gauge their reactions.”

“They’ll love anything you want to do,” Anukai laughed. “They really missed you.”

The AI woman offered a sad smile as she wrung her hands before her.

“And I all of you,” she replied.

The redhead grinned before stepping forward, wrapping GAIA in an embrace of her own, the AI woman returning it, as well. After a few moments, they pulled apart, but GAIA hesitated for a moment, her gaze fixed on Anukai’s face with a thoughtful expression.

“What is it?”

The AI woman shook her head quickly.

“My apologies, I… there was a… a calculation—a memory—that passed at that moment and—”

“What’s wrong, GAIA?” Anukai interjected, concern creasing her face.

The AI woman made the motion of sighing.

“For a moment, you reminded me very much of Aloy…”

The redhead paused for a moment, an unreadable expression crossing her face, before she cleared her throat.

“O-oh, well, you know, bound to happen…”

“Not her in a moment, as I remember, necessarily,” GAIA explained, her voice much softer, “but as I believe I…  _ wished _ … to see her.”

Anukai seemed no less hesitant, but perhaps more confused as the AI woman placed a hand on her shoulder tentatively.

“I do not compare you two lightly,” GAIA said. “I do not compare you two in many regards, as I do not see you as simply a repeat of her. In that moment, however… seeing you here, now, with the little ones… it… it reminded me of… what I had wished for—for her and…”

The redhead’s lips had drawn into a thin line as she swallowed heavily.

“I am immeasurably happy for you, Anukai,” the AI woman said, smiling. “I am happy for what you have achieved, and for who you have become.”

“You mean… not—”

“A mother, a wife, a protector,” GAIA interrupted. “Yourself.”

Anukai paused for a moment, her mouth hanging open, before it slowly closed as she offered a small smile, hints of a blush appearing along her cheekbones, amidst the freckles.

“Thank you.”

The redhead wrapped GAIA in an embrace, once again, before they both finally pulled apart, the AI woman offering another, genuine smile, before glancing around the living space of the apartment.

“How is Ikrie?” she asked.

“She’s good, and she’s here,” Anukai replied, wiping at the corners of her eyes with the back of her hand as she cleared her throat. “I was trying to give her a moment to rest.”

“She is not sick, is she?”

“Of Lani and Kal’s energy, maybe,” the redhead laughed. “I don’t know what it is, but this week they’ve been like bolts of lightning.”

“There have long been superstitions regarding the full moon and its effects on people,” GAIA replied, raising her eyebrows. “To my knowledge, there was no definitive answer, but anecdotally, many people reported increased agitation and behavior that was considered perhaps more ‘insane’ than normal.”

“Well, I’m glad I have something to blame other than myself,” the redhead quipped, sighing.

“Yourself?”

“Nothing—just—never mind, I didn’t mean that like… like that,” she said quickly.

Concern creased GAIA’s face as she tilted her head slightly, trying to meet the redhead’s eyes.

“I am sensing that this excursion may provide some benefits for you, as well.”

Anukai sighed, rubbing at her eyes tiredly.

“I hope so. I’m tired, too.”

GAIA placed a hand on the redhead’s back, rubbing at it supportively for a moment before the sounds of racing feet prompted both of them to turn to the hallway, once again. Lani and Kal shot from the end of it a moment later, skidding to a halt before the two women. They had each donned a set of standard day clothing, with both wearing tunics of dyed fabric and tanned leather leggings. GAIA noted how Lani’s outfit sported a large amount of blue with yellow pieces sewn into the sides and at her shoulders, while Kal’s was more red with turquoise accents.

A soft smile spread across the AI woman’s features as she glanced to Anukai.

“Okay, remember,” the redhead said, crouching down before the children a moment later to better look them in their eyes, “don’t be a hassle to Gramma, do as she asks, and make sure that all three of you make it back in one piece… with all of your possessions.”

The children nodded quickly as Anukai grinned, placing her hands on their shoulders.

“Now get your boots on.”

With that, they darted toward the rack beside the door as Anukai rose to her feet, groaning softly as she turned back to GAIA.

“You sure you’re okay to handle them on your own?”

“I do not anticipate significant problems,” the AI woman shook her head.

“Significant?”

“I will be fine,” GAIA countered, “and they will be fine.”

Anukai nodded just before the children appeared behind her, once again, now fully dressed.

“Okay,” the redhead said, turning back to them and bracing her hands on her hips, “I’m trusting you two.”

“We’ll be good!” Lani replied.

“We won’t be problems, I promise,” Kal added.

Anukai simply grinned before holding out her arms slightly, the children stepping forward to wrap her waist in a similar embrace to GAIA’s earlier, while the redhead gently ruffled their hair, as well.

“I love you, two.”

“Love you Mama,” they both replied in unison.

A moment later, they had released her and began to follow GAIA out of the apartment. As the AI woman held the door, ushering them outside, she spared one last glance back toward Anukai to find her grinning softly, her arms folded over her chest as she twisted one foot on the floor before her slowly.

“I will see you later today, when we return,” GAIA said. “I wish you a pleasant rest.”

The redhead shivered slightly for a moment before nodding.

“Thanks, GAIA.”

With that, the AI woman turned to her impatiently waiting charges and stepped outside into the bright, late-morning sun of Meridian.

“What are we doing first, Gramma?” Lani asked, seeming to skip back and forth before the entryway to the apartment, already.

“It has been some time since I have been able to visit Meridian,” she began. “I was hoping we could perhaps take a walk to see some of the new things since I was last here, and you can show me around to your favorites.”

With that, the siblings quickly began to argue about which they should visit first, although GAIA gently began to goad them further down the small side street, moving toward the main avenue ahead of them, a grin on her face as she watched their display of excitement, the moment never fully tipping into a full-on argument. As they reached the avenue, they had not been able to come to a decision, however, so GAIA intervened, offering instead to lead the way and they could point out what they thought was most interesting.

Lani and Kal quickly agreed, and they set out to their right, the AI woman continuing to follow a step or two behind her small charges as they animatedly talked and bounded ahead of her.

A process crossed through the forefront of her “thoughts” that prompted her to focus on it more intently than the others around it. Quickly, she recognized what it was and pulled it into the processing of her bot. As she did, she found she could sense what seemed to be a feeling of warmth, beyond the simple heat of the desert sun, spreading throughout her. The sensation seemed to come to an epicenter in her chest as the bot seemed to react by simulating the feeling of her heart beating faster.

As she glanced down at the auburn-haired girl and the dark-haired boy before her, Kal excitedly gesturing to something up ahead, she couldn’t help but smile broadly.

The feeling was something she had seen before, in watching how others reacted, but the moments she had been able to experience it on her own, in the bot, had been limited, thus far.

The first time had been when she had first attained the bot, when she had left the ELEUTHIA facility with Aloy, when they had first stated the word “family” about each other.

The second had been when she had returned to Meridian, when she had seen the same redhead for the first time in five years.

The rest had been scattered about, but those two stuck out to her.

She had seen it many times, though.

In Elisabet’s face when she spoke of her mother.

In Aloy’s when she spoke of Anukai.

In Anukai’s when she looked at the same children who skipped before GAIA now.

In that moment, GAIA could only feel the warmth that had spread throughout the bot, and a sense of gratitude that she had been allowed to experience it.

To feel love for Lani and Kal, as Gramma GAIA.

As the sounds of the animated squabbling retreated from the front door, Anukai sighed, turning to face the living space behind her and noting the clutter left about from the morning’s activities. With a heavy sigh, the redhead turned away from it, padding tiredly toward the hallway to the bedrooms as she set her sights on the door at the far end. When she reached it, she slowly turned the knob, glancing inside to find no signs of motion before slipping in, herself.

She took care to close the door with as little sound as possible, as well, before making her way across the mostly-dark room, the sunlight from outside largely blocked by the dark, drawn curtains. The sounds of soft breathing came from the bed ahead of her, and she could just make out a shape amidst the sheets, so she moved as silently as she could. When she reached the other side of the bed, she removed the tie from her hair, tossing it on the bedside table, before carefully climbed onto the mattress, moving toward the shape before pausing over it.

As Anukai’s eyes adjusted to the darkness, she was more easily able to make out the image of Ikrie sound asleep on her side, one arm wrapped around part of the sheets while most of her remained uncovered by them, anyway. The redhead smiled softly before leaning forward to place a soft kiss on the dark-haired woman’s shoulder. As she began to stir, Anukai carefully lay down behind her, nuzzling her face into the back of the other woman’s shoulder while also wrapping one arm over her midsection.

Ikrie didn’t seem to wake fully, but instinctually moved to press into the redhead’s form, which Anukai accepted eagerly, pulling her tighter into herself, even despite the warmth radiating from the dark-haired woman. The redhead closed her eyes as she breathed in the scent of Ikrie’s tunic, the effort to remove it before she had fallen asleep evidently too great.

“They finally tire out?”

Anukai sighed, pressing her face more firmly against Ikrie’s back.

“With GAIA,” she muttered. “Get some rest.”

A low, soft laugh reverberated through Ikrie’s torso as the redhead placed several more gentle kisses against the back of her shoulder.

“How am I supposed to sleep if you keep doing that?”

“Just want you to have good dreams.”

Ikrie laughed again, prompting Anukai to smile and place another kiss on her shoulder.

“You’re here. Of course I will.”

Eventually, the two women settled, their breathing slowly coming into synch with each other as Anukai felt the familiar pounding echoing from her chest through Ikrie’s and back. The feeling and the sound had been a constant for so many nights, so many years, that she was reasonably certain it was the only way she could sleep, now.

The feeling of fatigue in her limbs finally seemed to melt away as she drifted into unconsciousness, only for it to seemingly return what felt like moments later as the warm shape before her stirred. Anukai’s eyes cracked open as she found a sense of worry overtaking her. Ikrie eventually had rolled over in the redhead’s embrace, turning to face her, revealing that she appeared to be awake, with her eyes open, as well.

Anukai raised her eyebrows slightly, prompting Ikrie to grin and lean forward, placing a soft kiss against the side of her nose.

“Y’okay?” the redhead managed.

“I am,” Ikrie replied. “Just… got my nap in…”

Anukai continued to look back at her with confusion, sleep still hanging heavily over her mind. A moment later, however, the realization seemed to hit home as she felt Ikrie’s fingers tugging at her tunic, removing the tie at the bottom to hold it in place before dancing across her warm skin beneath. Not long after, and following a series of gentle kisses across the redhead’s face, her tunic had been thrown aside, followed shortly after by Ikrie’s.

The entire time, the redhead felt a part of her, in the back of her mind, begging to get more rest, but she tried to ignore it. She was largely successful as she felt her heart rate rising, her hands finding their way across the dark-haired woman’s back, pressing and massaging at the knots of muscle she found, but a few moments later, the other part of her mind seemed to play a much stronger hand.

Anukai had been raising herself on one elbow, Ikrie rolling onto her back before her, before she suddenly froze, a slight frown tugging at her lips as she felt her heart pounding in her chest for an entirely different reason. The dark-haired woman quickly picked up on the change in demeanor and began to prop herself up with her elbows behind her.

“What’s wrong?”

“N-nothing,” Anukai said, trying to lean forward for a kiss, but Ikrie placed two fingers on her lips, stopping her.

“Anukai…”

The redhead sighed, falling onto her back beside the dark-haired woman as she rubbed at her eyes tiredly.

“Something… something GAIA said… got to me, I guess.”

“What did she say?” Ikrie pressed, one hand sliding across Anukai’s stomach as her fingertips moved in gentle, massage-like motions.

“Just… it was dumb,” the redhead replied, “my reaction was dumb, I mean.”

Ikrie remained silent, propping herself up on one elbow beside her in a mirror image of their position moments ago.

“She… she mentioned… how happy she was for—for me but also—how she saw—saw Aloy in—me…”

The dark-haired woman paused her motions for a moment before sighing and leaning down to place a soft kiss on the exposed expanse of freckles on the redhead’s shoulder.

“She didn’t mean it to hurt you,” she whispered.

“I know, I know, which… that’s why my reaction was— _ is _ —dumb.”

“Anukai,” Ikrie sighed, “I know how you’ve felt about—all that—about you and Aloy and Ara and Ashana… and I remember every time you’ve felt like this.”

“Because it happens so much?” the redhead quipped bitterly.

“Because it hurts me to see you like this,” Ikrie replied, her voice barely louder than a whisper. “I hate to see you trying to tear yourself down, tear yourself apart, like this.”

“I… but of all the people you just said… what’s the  _ one _ way I’m different?”

“There’s more than one.”

“One that matters.”

“All of them matter.”

“Ikrie—”

“Anukai, I’m not going to let you do this to yourself,” the dark-haired woman interjected.

A moment later, she had lifted herself over the redhead, pinning Anukai’s hips to the bed as Ikrie braced her hands on either side of her head.

“Yes, you have children, but although being a mother is important and is an incredibly powerful part of you,” Ikrie began, “it does not solely define you. Lani and Kal see that, too. They look up to you, they’re inspired by you, they learn from you, and all of that is because of everything else you are, beyond just being their mother.

“That day we were down in the lower city, and we got word of one of the Striders going haywire and you took it down before it could hurt anyone? That whole rest of the day, Lani had a stick and she was pretending to shoot it like a bow, trying to strike the same pose as you. When you fixed Kal’s tunic the other week, he watched you the whole time, and just yesterday I saw him trying to stitch the edge of a scrap of leather lying around—granted, I wished he wouldn’t have used some of the expensive thread to do it, but, anyway…”

“Ashana can shoot a bow, and Ara can stitch, too.”

Ikrie hung her head, the tips of her dark hair tickling at the exposed skin of Anukai’s chest for a moment before she lifted it, once again.

“Not everything you do has to be wholly different than everyone else,” she said softly. “You and I do many of the same things. Does that mean that one of us now can’t?”

“No, no, I… I said—”

“Being your own person,” Ikrie interjected, meeting her eyes with an intensity that Anukai had only seen a handful of times in her life, “is about experiences—the path you take to get where you are, right now. So what if Aloy, Ara, and Ashana look like you? The path you’ve taken to get to right here, right now, is not theirs. The paths they have taken to get where they are right now, are not yours, either.”

By the end of her small speech, Anukai could detect the hints of a quaver in her voice, and she noted the growing wetness in the corners of Ikrie’s eyes.

“I’ve said it so many times, and I will remind you every time,” the dark-haired woman whispered. “You’re—not—just—another.”

A moment later, the redhead had wrapped her arms firmly around the dark-haired woman as Ikrie’s arms buckled and she fell atop Anukai, burying her face in the crook of her neck. The redhead felt her own hot tears welling in the corners of her eyes as she turned her head to bury her face in the shoulder-length mane of dark hair beside her. They remained there for several long moments before Anukai felt the telltale of something warm and wet press against the nape of her neck.

Eventually, the sensation began to move across her shoulder, spreading down her left arm slowly until the sensation changed. A shiver ran down Anukai’s spine as she watched and felt Ikrie’s motions, curling her arm slowly at the dark-haired woman’s behest until Ikrie placed a kiss on her knuckles.

“Now,” the dark-haired woman said, coming to rest in a seated position that still held Anukai firmly onto the bed at her waist, “as I started before…”

The redhead grinned, laughing softly as Ikrie leaned forward, finally indulging her with a passionate kiss that left both of them panting softly when they finally pulled apart.

“I think  _ I _ should be making it up to you,” Anukai shot back.

“Hmmm…” the dark-haired woman purred, cocking her head to the side slightly as her eyes narrowed, a smirk tugging at her lips, “I suppose you could.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t think the Lodge is really the place for—”

“Nana!”

Suddenly, the two charges suddenly raced past the doorman, leaving him staring back in confusion until he noted the raven-haired Carja they had both quickly attached themselves, to, and he turned back to GAIA, an expression of realization on his face.

“My apologies,” he said. “I didn’t recognize them—or you.”

“It is all right,” the AI woman replied. “You were right, but I could not keep them away.”

The doorman’s lips drew into a thin line as he nodded and gestured past him vaguely. GAIA grinned and began to make her way toward her charges. As she approached, Talanah pulled a double take, eyes widening slightly as she rose to her feet.

“GAIA, this—I wasn’t expecting you,” she said.

“I arrived earlier than I expected,” the AI woman replied. “I… wanted some more time… before any obligations.”

Talanah nodded, grinning as the women exchanged a brief embrace, not having long before Lani and Kal were quickly pulling at the Carja woman’s tunic, once again.

“We wanna show Gramma GAIA with our bows,” Lani said insistently.

“Oh, so that’s why you dragged her here?” Talanah teased, smirking. “Not to see me?”

“N-no, not just—”

“I’m kidding, Lani,” the Carja woman replied, ruffling her hair as the girl pouted slightly. “I see you all the time, and a visit from Gramma GAIA’s special.”

“So… can we show her the bows?” Kal asked quietly.

“Give me a few minutes and I’ll get them,” Talanah replied. “I was in the middle of something I have to wrap up.”

The Carja woman glanced toward the end of the bar in the center of the room, drawing GAIA’s gaze as she found a woman with night-black skin and curly, dark hair tied behind her in a tight bun, a smirk set into her features as she leaned against the wooden surface.

“I thought you had retired?” GAIA asked softly, turning back to Talanah.

“I did, but… once a Hawk, always a Hawk,” she shrugged. “She’s not opposed to help, and I’m not opposed to giving it.”

The AI woman nodded as Talanah turned to make her way back to the bar, only for Lani and Kal to begin following her. When she glanced back, she paused, smirking.

“Excuse me, you two. Once Laki and I have finished, you can pester us all you want,” she said, making a show of bracing her hands on her hips as she stared down at the children. “Stay with Gramma GAIA and I’ll come get you.”

The children quickly nodded and retreated back to GAIA, who gently ruffled their hair, when they approached, Kal quickly running his hands over his hair to smooth it after she had.

“Come, let us find a space for a few minutes.”

With that, the AI woman led the two of them to a table set along the edge of the room, where few hunters sat, although thankfully the few who were nearby had not indulged themselves at the bar to any extreme lengths by midday, she noted. As GAIA took a seat at the table, Kal quickly scrambled to claim a seat with her, prompting the AI woman to grin and lift him into place on her left knee.

“You are getting big for this,” she commented, keeping one hand held behind the boy’s back to prevent him from accidentally falling.

“Maybe soon I can use a real bow then,” he said excitedly, “like Mama.”

GAIA nodded.

“Maybe.”

Lani took a place on GAIA’s opposite side, leaning against her opposite knee with her elbows, prompting the AI woman to temporarily shut off the simulated pain receptors so as not to immediately discourage the girl.

“What did you say about Nana, earlier?” she asked.

“What do you mean?”

“You said she was very tired,” Lani explained. “How did you know?”

GAIA paused for a moment before laughing softly, gently rubbing her free hand across the young redhead’s back.

“I mentioned that she was retired, yes,” the AI woman explained, “however that doesn’t mean that she is about to fall asleep.”

“What does it mean, then?” Kal interjected.

“It means that she was once the Sunhawk in this lodge,” GAIA explained, “but she gave up her position to someone else.”

“Why did she do that?”

“Well, you may ask her later, if you wish,” the AI woman continued, “but many people do that when they reach a certain age. Would you like to do the same things every day for your whole life?”

Lani frowned.

“That sounds boring.”

“Well, that is why Nana retired from being a Sunhawk,” GAIA explained. “She wanted to experience different things, and she also now has much more time to spend with you two than if she had not.”

They both nodded, but Kal shifted in his seat on GAIA’s knee slightly as he did.

“You knew Nana and Gramma when she was the Sunhawk, right?” he asked quietly.

“I did, yes.”

“How hard is it to be one?”

“From what I know, it takes great skill,” GAIA said.

“So… Nana and Gramma were very good, right?”

“Yes, and they still are.”

Kal appeared to think for a moment before looking to GAIA with a tentative expression.

“Do you think Nana could teach me?”

“And me, too!” Lani interjected, straightening up from her position against GAIA’s opposite knee.

“I think there are a great many things she can teach you,” the AI woman said, “just as your mothers can, as well as Gramma, and myself.”

“You can shoot bows, too?” he replied.

GAIA hesitated for a moment, the processing of what the dark-haired boy had been asking finally registering as she sighed.

“I do not, no,” she replied, “but there are many other things to learn that I can teach you.”

“Like what?”

She studied Kal’s face for a moment as she referenced his expression with the thousands of image datapoints she had saved of his mothers, as well as Aloy and Talanah, all in a fraction of a heartbeat. Finally, she concluded that his question was not meant in disappointment or accusation, and she smiled, rubbing at his back.

“About the earth, about the sky, about the plants and the animals, about the mountains, about the rivers, about oceans…”

“What’s an oh-sha?” Lani interjected.

“Ocean,” GAIA replied, glancing down at her. “It is an enormous body of water that is miles across, stretching from one coast to another.”

“Oh, so like Aunt Ara told us about,” Kal replied.

“She did grow up near one, yes,” GAIA nodded.

“You know it, too?”

“There are more than one, but yes.”

“You know a lot,” Lani commented, staring up at GAIA with a thoughtful expression.

The AI woman smiled softly as she turned to her, once again.

“That was my job, as Nana’s was to be Sunhawk.”

Just then, the AI woman glanced up to see two figures approaching their table, quickly drawing the attention of the children, once again.

“You haven’t been terrorizing poor Gramma GAIA this whole time, have you?” Talanah quipped, coming to a stop beside the table as Lani slid over to her and wrapped her arms around her waist.

“They have been good,” GAIA replied, grinning as she turned to Kal, rubbing his back one more time before letting him off her knee.

“So, I heard you two talking about bows, earlier,” the second figure, Laki, said as she stepped beside Talanah, holding one arm behind her back for a moment before revealing two smaller, training bows in her hand.

The children jumped excitedly, moving to reach for them before pausing as they glanced to Talanah for a moment, who simply smirked and nodded toward the woman beside her, once again.

“They’re hers, so you better ask her for permission.”

The children quickly turned back to Laki, standing at attention before her as the current Sunhawk knelt before them.

“Now, I will let you borrow these, if you promise me two things.”

They both quickly nodded as she raised one eyebrow toward them.

“You haven’t even heard what they are.”

Both children quickly froze before hanging their heads slightly.

“One: be safe at all times. No shooting indoors, no shooting at each other—or anyone else—and you listen to any adult when they tell you to stop.”

Lani and Kal nodded in response.

“Two: return my bows in the shape that you found them. Respect for your weapon is crucial. Treat it as reverently as you treat your own grandmothers.”

Talanah let out a soft, dry laugh before quickly covering her mouth as Laki shot her a look.

“Do I have your words?” the Sunhawk said, turning back to the children.

They both nodded resolutely, prompting Laki to grin and hand them each one of the bows.

“What do you say?” Talanah chided softly.

“Thank you Laki!”

The Sunhawk grinned as she watched the two of them beginning to buzz with even more energy than earlier, already.

“You know where the targets are,” she said, turning back to Talanah.

“I do, thanks,” she replied.

Laki nodded before glancing toward GAIA, the grin still on her face.

“It’s nice to see you again,” she said.

“Likewise, Laki,” the AI woman said. “I am glad to see your lodge still thrives.”

“Haven’t accidentally run it into the ground, yet,” she quipped, glancing toward Talanah with a smirk. “Someone keeps me in line.”

“I do not keep you in line,” the raven-haired Carja sighed, rolling her eyes. “You ask me for advice and I offer what I know. You can feel free to go any way from that line that you want.”

Laki laughed before patting the elder Carja on her shoulder.

“Thank you for coming by,” she said. “Give my best to Aloy, and the girls.”

She glanced toward the small children behind her before flashing a grin around at the adults one more time and slipping away.

“All right, you two, you wanted to show Gramma GAIA, right?”

Anukai slowly found herself drifting back from unconsciousness begrudgingly, attempting to keep her eyes closed in a vain attempt to slip back into sleep, but moments later it proved ultimately unsuccessful as she found herself wide awake, acutely aware of everything around her. With a sigh, she stirred slightly, finding that the surface before her was rather warm to the touch and most definitely not her sheets.

Without opening her eyes, she turned her head to one side, pressing her lips against whatever portion of exposed skin sat before her. As she did, the warm figure before her began to stir, as well, a soft groan reverberating through Anukai’s cheek as she rested her cheek against her.

“Nap over already?”

The redhead grinned as she adjusted her position, finally cracking open her eyes. For a moment, the world was blurry before her, but as she blinked, the image of an expanse of freckled skin came into focus before her. With a slow, deep breath, she closed her eyes, again, nuzzling her face into the warmth before her as best she could.

“You’re worse than the children at waking up.”

“I don’t wanna,” Anukai muttered, grinning as she drew out her words.

A soft laugh shook the body beneath her, again, as she felt an arm wrap around her back, fingers gently tracing along her side.

“You’re lucky all three of you are so cute.”

The redhead laughed, as well, before turning to place several more kisses before her, finally opening her eyes as she turned her head to truly get her bearings. As she did, she found her chin coming to rest on Ikrie’s shoulder, the dark-haired woman already staring back at her with a soft smile.

“I guess if you’re going to talk like that, I can try to stay awake,” Anukai replied.

Ikrie laughed softly, once again, before the redhead pulled herself partially on top of her, pressing a slow kiss into her lips. They remained locked in the same position for several moments before the sound of an electronic chime from nearby prompted them both to pause. Finally, Anukai sighed, letting her cheek come to rest on Ikrie’s chest.

“Is it that time, already?”

She felt Ikrie shift slightly under her as the dark-haired woman reached toward the bedside table to her left, eventually managing to pull the Focus from atop it and slide it by her ear.

“Hey, GAIA,” she said, “on your way back?”

She paused for a moment before nodding as a yawn began to overtake her, drowning out whatever words she had tried to say.

“Okay, thank you,” she repeated, tapping at the Focus, once again, before tossing it onto the table. “They’re almost here.”

“Thanks for the warning,” Anukai sighed, beginning to disentangle herself from her wife, only for the dark-haired woman to pull her back down with the arm behind her back.

“Not quite so fast,” Ikrie teased, planting another kiss on her for several long moments.

When they pulled apart, once again, Anukai found both of them panting softly.

“Now we can move,” the dark-haired woman said.

The redhead rolled her eyes, placing one last, quick kiss on her before finally managing to disentangle herself from both Ikrie and the sheets. With a groan, she managed to pull herself to her feet, stretching her back as she glanced toward the discarded clothing on the floor before ultimately deciding to make her way to the bureau, removing a new set of leggings and a green-and-blue Carja silk top.

As she finished dressing, she grabbed the hair tie from her own bedside table and took a seat on the end of the bed. She contemplated attempting an actual, full braid but ultimately settled for simply pulling the unruly copper mane behind her and tying it in place so that it still fell loosely across her back, but at least stayed away from her face.

As soon as she had, however, Ikrie suddenly appeared before her, gently sliding into a seat on her knees as the redhead smirked.

“Yes?”

Ikrie remained silent, but reached behind her, undoing the hair tie as Anukai pouted. The dark-haired woman grinned, placing a quick kiss on her before beginning to tug at the redhead’s hair. Anukai simply remained still, her eyes sliding half-closed as her wife’s fingers trailed through her hair, pulling it neatly behind her head. A moment later, the pressure of Ikrie’s weight lifted from her legs, but her grip on her hair remained as the dark-haired woman moved behind her, kneeling on the bed.

Anukai closed her eyes fully as she waited for Ikrie to finish whatever project she had evidently decided her hair needed to be. Finally, she seemed satisfied, and released her hold, the redhead noting that she couldn’t feel any of it against the back of her neck, particularly as Ikrie placed several kisses against it. When Anukai opened her eyes, once again, she found the dark-haired woman had moved before her, once again, resting one knee on hers as she leaned forward, evidently examining her work from the front. The redhead grinned, reaching behind her to feel for whatever her wife had done, but Ikrie quickly bat her hand away.

“Don’t touch it, you’ll ruin it,” she smirked.

Anukai rolled her eyes, but leaned forward to press another kiss against her.

“Fine, I won’t touch it,” she sighed, “but you really need to get dressed.”

Ikrie smirked but slipped across the room, also pulling a new set of clothing from inside their bureau. A moment later, she had fully dressed in a pair of Carja silk leggings that flowed around her calves and ankles slightly and a white, fabric tunic that wrapped across her torso before securing at her side with a clasp. Anukai rose from her seat on the bed, stepping over to Ikrie and running her fingers through her shoulder-length dark hair, cocking her head to the side slightly.

“Yours isn’t long enough for me to have fun,” she sighed.

“Oh? You certainly seemed to earlier,” Ikrie shot back, raising one eyebrow.

Anukai’s face instantly grew hot as she hit the dark-haired woman’s shoulder playfully. Before they could exchange any further banter, the sound of the front door to the apartment opening prompted them both to turn toward the door to their bedroom. With a smirk, the redhead turned back to her wife.

“Act appropriately.”

“You’re one to talk.”

Anukai rolled her eyes, turning to make her way toward the door, but Ikrie suddenly grabbed her wrist, bringing her to a stop. The redhead glanced back at her, confusion creasing her face.

“Everything’s okay, right?” the dark-haired woman asked softly. “With GAIA?”

Anukai paused, biting her lower lip for a moment before she sighed, nodding.

“Yeah… yeah, everything’s fine.”

Ikrie paused for a moment longer, still holding onto her wrist before Anukai moved closer, placing another kiss on her before leaning her forehead against Ikrie’s.

“Thank you.”

A moment later, the sound of motion and additional, non-childlike voices quickly drew them to the door, Anukai leading the way toward the living space. As they entered, she paused, taking in the sight of Talanah kneeling beside Lani, the young redhead standing in a shooting position for a bow, even though none was held in her hand, the raven-haired Carja adjusting her right arm slightly to a better draw position.

“Well, look at that, you left with one gramma and you came back with two,” she quipped.

Lani and Kal jumped, quickly beginning to recount their day excitedly, talking over each other at numerous points, while Anukai watched Ikrie greet the older women behind them. Eventually, they reached a moment of pause and the older redhead leaned down toward them.

“Hey, your Mom wants to hear some of this, too, you know.”

With that, Lani and Kal quickly scurried across the room, orbiting around Ikrie in their kitchenette as she shot a look over their heads toward Anukai, eliciting a smirk from the redhead. With that, she turned back to Talanah and GAIA, stepping forward to wrap the Carja in an embrace.

“They weren’t too much trouble, I hope,” she said.

“They were fine,” Talanah laughed. “So much energy… I don’t know if I can keep up by myself anymore.”

“Good thing you had GAIA, then,” Anukai said.

“I was able to mitigate some of the energy and attention,” the AI woman confirmed.

“They’ll always listen to you,” the redhead said. “It’s your power you hold over them.”

“I only intend to foster and educate—”

“I’m not worried,” Anukai interjected. “They love it.”

GAIA paused for a moment before a soft smile began to tug at her lips.

“I am glad.”


	21. Now, As Before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

Anukai breathed a heavy sigh of relief as she stepped out onto the balcony of the Palace, pressing her hands into the small of her back as she made her way to the nearby railing. As she reached it, she came to a stop, bracing her hands atop the stone surface and staring out at the orange sun as it sank toward the distant horizon. The sounds of the other council members filing out of the stairwell after her disturbed the momentary peace, their voices immediately bringing a tight feeling to the redhead’s temples, her hands lifting to massage forcefully at them as she tried to block them out.

A moment later, something touched the back of her shoulder and she jumped, her head whirling around to find a familiar face beside her, a grin set into the well-freckled and wrinkle-creased features.

“I know that look,” Aloy said softly.

“I’ve seen it, too,” Anukai sighed. “Think it’s just a Sobeck trademark, by now.”

“That it very well might be,” the elder woman nodded, glancing back at the dissipating crowd behind them. “It’s been years since I’ve had to listen to this much talking in one afternoon.”

“Well, you know how it is around here,” the younger redhead sighed, “progress by committee.”

“It’s what keeps things like a dictatorship from happening,” Aloy chided.

“Like… Avad’s father?”

“More or less,” the elder woman nodded, gently beginning to push Anukai toward the stairway down to the bridge. “Let’s not linger a second longer than we have to.”

With that, the women quietly slipped past the slowly departing councilmembers, quickly reaching the bridge and crossing. As they reached the far side, Anukai noted that Bekan was missing from his usual guard, prompting her to catch the eye of the man who seemed to be the leader for the shift.

“No Bekan?”

“Said he had a ‘special evening’, but wouldn’t say what it was,” the guard shrugged.

Anukai simply raised her eyebrows, but didn’t press further as she turned to follow Aloy into the city streets. Their conversation quickly moved away from the business of GAIA’s network expansion eastward and the burgeoning railroad that was nearing completion, the latter being Ashana’s area of expertise, to that of the children.

“Kal’s really taken to the basic coding lessons I’ve given him, hasn’t he?” Aloy asked, slipping past a merchant carrying a rather large crate filled with what appeared to be scraps of metal.

“Well, he likes the shapes and colors, at least,” Anukai replied, smirking.

“He’s a  _ child _ , Anukai.”

“I know, I know,” she laughed. “He enjoys it, I think. Certainly spends many afternoons in relative quiet with the Focus.”

“And Lani?”

“She’s… inclined to other things,” Anukai said slowly.

“Like…?”

The younger redhead smirked

“Why don’t you come ask her?”

“Only if it’s not an intrusion,” Aloy replied.

“Of course not. Ara’s watching them during the meeting because Ikrie also had some  _ business _ in the fields in the east part of the Lower Village today. I’m sure she’ll appreciate someone else to draw their attention for a moment.”

Anukai noticed how Aloy seemed to pause for a moment longer than normal before replying as they turned onto the street of the younger woman’s apartment.

“You seem to put a lot of trust in her…”

“Well, of course, she’s my s—” Anukai began to reply quickly, but paused for a moment, glancing over at the older woman beside her and swallowing heavily. “She’s my sister.”

Aloy glanced over at her, as well, a slight glint in the familiar gold-green eyes that met her gaze.

“I’m glad.”

Anukai smiled softly, but fell silent as they reached the front door of the apartment. A moment later, she produced the key from a pouch on her belt and unlocked it, pushing the wooden portal open and peeking her head inside. Almost immediately, the sounds of wild laughter and high-pitched voices poured from the opening, and the sights inside equally matched the volume. Lani and Kal stood in the center of the room, holding small, training sticks they had used for sparring when they had insisted on practicing like their mothers, facing the corner of the room off to the right, while Ara sat on the couch behind them, her shoulders draped in a dark blue blanket that Anukai thought perhaps didn’t belong in the living space.

“—hold it back until I can shoot it!” Lani was shouting.

“No,  _ I’ll _ shoot it!” Kal retorted.

“It already spotted you, you won’t be able to shoot in time!”

“You stick out like a fire on the snow!”

Anukai’s grin began to fade into a frown as she stepped farther into the apartment.

“Children…”

Her voice didn’t seem to register with them, however, as they turned to each other and began to argue louder and faster, Anukai sparing a glance toward Ara, who sighed and shrugged off the blanket, rising from her seat on the couch.

“Lani! Kal!”

They still didn’t seem to listen to Ara, prompting Anukai to draw a deep breath.

“ _ Talanah! Kallik! _ ”

Both children instantly froze, their eyes widening as they turned to their mother, finding Anukai standing just behind them, her hands braced on her hips.

“So you were choosing to ignore Auntie Ara and me, is that it?” she said, her voice quieter but no less intense.

“N-no…” Kal stammered

“Then next time we try to get your attention, please listen to us,” Anukai sighed. “Now, I think you owe an apology to Auntie Ara.”

The children turned to her, muttering a mostly-intelligible apology as Ara simply folded her arms over her chest, raising her eyebrows at them, prompting them to repeat themselves with a much clearer “we’re sorry, Auntie Ara.”

“And,” Anukai continued, “you owe an apology to Grandma.”

Both children’s eyes widened as they spun toward their mother before glancing past her to find Aloy standing just inside the doorway, her arms folded over her chest in a near identical pose to Ara.

“G-Grandma!” they both managed, moving as if to rush to her for a moment before they paused, swallowing nervously. “We’re sorry, Grandma.”

“Now, since Grandma’s here, can you please clean up from your exciting afternoon so that we can all use the living space?”

Lani and Kal both nodded before turning to the far corner to begin dismantling their construction made out of chairs and more blankets from somewhere else in the apartment. Anukai noted that it appeared to vaguely be in the shape of some kind of imposing figure, but she couldn’t tell exactly what they had intended it to be in their play fight moments ago. With a sigh, she turned back to Ara, who was grinning sheepishly at her.

“We were having a good afternoon,” she said almost apologetically.

“Not your fault,” Anukai sighed. “They’re just… at that age, it seems.”

Ara smirked, nodding, before turning to Aloy as she approached the women.

“Hey, haven’t seen you in a while,” the shorter-haired redhead quipped. “Figured no news is good news if you haven’t messaged me about—”

“Let’s not talk about work,” the elder woman interrupted, shooting Anukai a smirk. “We’ve had enough of that for the day… if not the week.”

Ara nodded, laughing.

“That bad?”

“Be glad you don’t have to sit through those meetings more often,” Anukai muttered, rubbing at her temples before turning toward the kitchen. “Anyone else want a drink?”

“Getting started earlier for the night?”

The braided redhead paused at the door to the chillbox, seemingly lost in thought for a moment before turning to glance back toward the other two.

“You know, I wasn’t considering alcohol, but you reminded me we have some wine that needs to be drunk…”

Aloy rolled her eyes as Ara smirked.

“You two like some?”

A minute later, Anukai pushed the two wine glasses across the counter to Ara and Aloy, lifting her own to take a whiff of the red liquid inside with a sigh.

“Is this some that Talanah gave you?” Aloy asked thoughtfully, also inhaling the aroma above her glass.

“For my birthday, yeah,” the younger redhead nodded, taking a sip of her glass and sighing. “We finished off the other two bottles already.”

“Already?” Ara teased. “It’s been a month.”

“We have excuses why we can’t have as much,” Anukai shot back. “Two of them.”

The other two laughed as the sound of small feet racing into the living room signaled the entrance of the smallest members of the household, the pattering quickly making their way to the kitchen. As the children attempted to squeeze past Ara, Kal tried to duck in front of Lani, who then grabbed at his shirt for a moment, tugging him backward before he tried to twist from her grasp. Once he broke free, he whirled toward her, beginning to yell almost immediately.

“Don’t grab me!”

“Don’t cut like that!”

“I got here first!”

“We were the same!”

“Were not!”

Kal suddenly stepped forward, shoving Lani’s shoulders backward and sending her nearly staggering into Ara.

“Hey! Kallik!” Anukai snapped, placing her glass on the counter and taking a quick step toward her son, reaching for his shoulder.

“Don’t push me!” Lani shrieked, attempting to step forward, but Ara was faster and grabbed her shoulder, as well, holding her in place.

Anukai pulled Kal back a step or two before turning him to face her, kneeling before him and placing both hands on his shoulders.

“What are you doing, Kallik?” she said firmly.

“She grabbed me!”

“There was no need for a competition,” Anukai shot back, “and therefore definitely no need to shove your sister.”

“But—”

“No, there is no ‘but.’”

“She did it first!” he said quickly, stamping one foot and flailing one arm in Lani’s direction.

“That does not make it right, though, and was no reason for retaliation,” Anukai replied, shaking her head.

“Why are you just yelling at me, then?” Kal pouted, his voice wavering on the edge of crying.

“I will talk to her in a moment, but you were closer,” the redhead said, removing her right hand from his shoulder to brace it on her thigh, sliding her left arm around her son’s shoulders as she turned her gaze to Lani. “Talanah, that was unnecessary to grab your brother from behind like that.”

“But he—”

“Little Red…” Ara interrupted in a low voice, visibly squeezing her shoulder for a moment.

“Would you like it if someone suddenly grabbed you from behind and tried to tug you backward?” Anukai replied. “No, because it’s scary, can hurt, and could lead to another injury.”

Lani looked as if she wanted to argue, once again, but ultimately fell silent, hanging her head so that her auburn hair blocked her face.

“Now, I don’t know what’s gotten into you two today,” Anukai sighed, glancing between her children, “but this needs to stop, okay?”

A moment’s pause followed before both of them slowly began to nod. Anukai turned toward Kal under her arm beside him, finding the dark-haired boy’s head hung forward so that he was not meeting her gaze.

“Okay, Kal?”

He nodded sullenly, once again, but still refused to look up at her. With a frown, his mother gently shook his shoulders.

“Hey, look at me…”

Kal still refused to lift his head, until Anukai gently placed two of her fingers beneath his chin, lifting his gaze until it finally met hers.

“I’m not mad at you, things just need to… calm down a little bit, okay? I don’t want either of you to get hurt.”

His pale blue eyes continued to meet hers, even as she noted hints of wateriness in them, until he finally nodded, and she offered a small smile, pulling him in closer to her. As she did, Kal’s arms quickly wrapped around her neck and shoulder, burying his face in the crook of her neck. Anukai rubbed his back reassuringly as she glanced toward Lani, gesturing with her free hand for her to come closer, as well.

The small redhead finally left her place beside Ara, eagerly slipping into her mother’s embrace and wrapping one arm behind her shoulder, while also notably wrapping one arm behind her brother’s as well. Anukai’s smile broadened as she turned to place a kiss against the crown of Lani’s head.

“All of that goes for you, too, okay?” she hummed softly in her daughter’s ear.

Lani nodded in response, prompting Anukai to turn back to Kal and also place a kiss against the top of his head. A moment later, the group embrace broke apart and the dark-haired boy quickly wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand.

“Now, we can all have a good time, right? Grandma was excited to see you two,” Anukai said, glancing toward Aloy with a grin before turning back to her children. “Why don’t you show her something each of you has done lately?”

With that, the children quickly shot off toward their rooms, leaving the women in a moment of peace, once again. With a heavy sigh, Anukai rose to her feet and slid back to the counter, taking another sip of her wine.

“I need this more, now…” she muttered.

“You did good,” Ara interjected, grinning as she reached across the counter to place her hand over Anukai’s. “Firm but… nobody cried.”

“Almost did,” Anukai shot back.

“But they didn’t,” Aloy reaffirmed. “They knew it came from a place of love, not anger.”

The redheaded mother nodded awkwardly as she tried to hide the redness across her cheekbones behind a sip of her drink. A moment later, attention was drawn from her as the sound of Lani and Kal racing back into the living space drew it to them, instead. Both children began talking excitedly, their words overlapping each other, which prompted Anukai to smirk. Ara and Aloy attempted to keep up for a few moments before the silver-streaked redhead laughed and raised her hands defensively.

“I want to hear about both of you, but one at a time, please,” she said.

The siblings glanced toward each other, and Anukai drew in a breath, noting the momentary intensity of their gaze, only for Kal to nod and Lani turned back to Aloy.

“I’ve been working on this cal… calla… callagraffy Nana taught me!” the small redhead proclaimed excitedly, holding out a long piece of parchment.

Anukai grinned as she tilted her head slightly to see the page around Ara’s shoulder, noting the shaky, dark lines of charcoal on it that bared a somewhat passing resemblance to Carja glyphs. Aloy carefully took the parchment from Lani, studying the marks on it for a moment or two before nodding, adopting an impressed expression.

“There’s some good work, here,” she said, lowering the parchment to meet Lani’s gaze. “I can see you getting better even on here.”

“It’s hard, but… it’s fun,” the small girl replied, clasping her hands behind her and twisting in place slowly. “I wanna draw as pretty as Nana one day.”

“She’s very good at this,” Aloy nodded. “She started when she was about your age, too, though. I’m sure she’ll be happy to keep teaching you. She tried to teach me, but I was pretty bad at it.”

“You were bad at it?” Lani asked incredulously.

“That surprises you?”

“You’re good at everything!”

All three women laughed as Aloy knelt before the small redhead, placing one hand along the side of her cheek.

“I appreciate the confidence,” she said, “but yes, there are some things I’m not good at.”

With that, Aloy handed the parchment back to Lani, and turned to Kal, who was turning a Focus over in his fingers.

“What’ve you got there?” the elder woman asked.

“I did some of those problems you gave me,” he said, holding out the device. “I think I did them right.”

Aloy took the Focus, removing her own before sliding it beside her ear. She stared at the air before her for a few moments, occasionally swiping at unseen displays before nodding and tapping at the device, once again, her gaze returning to Kal.

“You did do them right,” she said. “I see you started to get them right on the first try, even.”

The dark-haired boy smiled broadly as he took the Focus back from Aloy, closing his fist protectively around the device.

“Maybe someday you can take over for me so Nana and I can retire and be lazy together.”

Kal’s eyes lit up as Anukai smirked, exchanging a glance with Ara.

“Really?”

“We’ve got some time,” Aloy replied, shrugging. “We’ll see.”

The dark-haired boy beamed as he glanced toward his sister, inclining his head slightly.

“Hear that, Lani?”

Anukai cleared her throat loudly, prompting her son to wince, hanging his head as he nervously glanced back toward her. The redhead simply raised her eyebrows, prompting Kal to swallow nervously and turn back to his sister.

“Sorry.”

Anukai sighed, taking another sip of her drink as Lani turned to place her parchment back on the low table before the couch. As she began to lower her glass, Kal suddenly took on a thoughtful expression as he turned to look past the edge of the counter toward her.

“Mama, did you and Auntie Ara get in trouble from Grandma when you were children?”

All three women instantly froze, Anukai unsure if her heart was suddenly beating so fast she couldn’t discern a single heartbeat from the others, or if it had stopped, altogether. Ara had been mid-sip of her drink, turned toward the counter, thus hiding her face from the children, but revealing the wide-eyed panic that had overcome her clearly to Anukai. The two of them exchanged glances before their eyes darted to the silver-streaked matriarch beside them, finding Aloy equally as frozen in uncertainty. After a few long seconds, Anukai swallowed heavily, even as her wine remained firmly in its glass.

Before she could speak, however, Lani interrupted.

“And Auntie Ash, Kal!”

In a split second, Anukai found her resolve to try to answer disappearing, leaving her glancing desperately between Ara and Aloy, until finally her shorter-haired counterpart sighed, lowering her glass to the counter and turning to the children.

“We didn’t grow up together, remember?” she said softly, leaning casually against the counter as Anukai noted the subtle tension in her shoulders, even as her posture tried to portray the opposite.

“But… you’re our Auntie which means you and Mama are sisters, right?”

“That’s right, Little Red,” Ara replied firmly and quickly, nodding.

“But… you didn’t grow up together…” Lani continued, her face contorting in thought as Anukai felt her right hand tensing around her glass, “so… Grandma wasn’t with all of you?”

Once again, all three women exchanged glances before Anukai cleared her throat, drawing the room’s attention, prompting her to glance down into the red liquid before her for a moment before she drew a deep breath.

“No, Lani. We each… had our own people we grew up around,” she replied, sparing a knowing glance with Ara.

Almost immediately, Kal’s face contorted in an expression somewhere between confusion and frustration, while his sister’s remained thoughtful. A moment later, his gaze lifted to Aloy, once again, and the room seemed to go particularly silent as he opened his mouth.

“Why did you leave them, Grandma?”

Almost immediately, Anukai’s eyes widened as she glanced from her son to the elder redhead across the counter, finding Aloy’s eyes wide, as well, as she leaned her weight into the counter much more than she had a moment ago.

“K-Kal…”

The dark-haired boy continued to stare at Aloy quizzically as Anukai quickly released her glass, moving around the counter to approach him, kneeling before her son and placing her hands on his shoulders, once again.

“Kal, that’s… that’s not…”

“Anukai,” Aloy suddenly interrupted, stopping her mid-thought and drawing both hers and Kal’s gazes to her, “it’s a fair question.”

“Fair?” she shot back. “Mo—Aloy, it’s not!”

“It is,” the elder woman shook her head.

As Anukai shot a desperate look to Ara, her shorter-haired counterpart quickly downed the rest of her drink before clearing her throat.

“I… uh… I have a… project, I have to… I was supposed to check on tonight…” Ara muttered, gesturing vaguely toward the front door of the apartment before muttering the remainder of her half-hearted excuse and moving to make her exit.

“Auntie, wait!” Lani called, moving toward the door before Anukai quickly shifted before her, as well, holding her in place.

“It’s okay, Lani, d-don’t worry, she… she has a—job—at the Palace she needs to go to…” the braided redhead stammered, sparing one last desperate glance toward Ara as the other redhead grimaced apologetically and made her exit, waving goodbye to the children.

“Did I scare her away?” Kal asked softly, his voice barely audible, even from Anukai’s position directly before him, as the door finished closing behind Ara.

“N-no, Kal,” she said quickly, spinning toward him and attempting to squeeze his shoulder reassuringly, but as he winced and backed away slightly, she realized her grip with her left hand had been stronger than intended. “I’m sorry, Kal, sorry, I didn’t mean to…”

As Anukai’s breathing quickened and she removed her left hand from her son’s shoulder, instead moving her right to cup his cheek, she found the hurt look on his face refused to fade, and she spared a quick, desperate glance toward Aloy, behind her.

“You didn’t scare her away, Kal,” Aloy said softly, moving from her place beside the counter to approach the small group, slipping past them to take a seat on the couch before gesturing for the children to sit beside her. “You asked a good question, but she’s not sure she has the answer.”

The children glanced questioningly toward their mother, prompting Anukai to swallow heavily and nod, gently urging them toward the elder redhead. As they took seats on the furniture beside her, Aloy brought her hands to rest on the backs of their shoulders, rubbing at them reassuringly.

“Do… do you, Grandma?” Lani asked tentatively, glancing up at the elder woman beside her.

“I do, but it isn’t a simple one,” Aloy nodded, glancing between the children before turning her gaze to Anukai, who remained kneeling on the opposite side of the low table before her. “As I’m sure you two are well aware… nothing is, with our family.”

The children glanced up at her in anticipation as their mother found herself holding her breath, waiting to see exactly what the elder woman would tell them.

“First and foremost: I did not leave Auntie Ara, Auntie Ashana, or your mother.”

Lani and Kal seemed slightly relieved, but Anukai still caught how the uneasy look on her son’s face remained.

“They came into my life and we’re all here now, however they didn’t come into my life the way you two came into your mothers’,” Aloy continued. “I knew GAIA from when I was younger than your mothers are now. Talanah, too, and we were already very much in love back then—”

“Eww,” Kal interrupted, making a face as Aloy shot him a raised-eyebrow look, prompting him to quickly fall still and silent, once again.

“Despite that,” she continued, “we felt we were still missing something. I was not able to have Anukai, or Ara, or Ashana as I wished… but through GAIA’s help, they came into my life, just the same.”

As Kal nodded, Anukai noted that Lani’s face had contorted in thought, but her expression was quickly changing as her lower lip began to tremble, the first hints of wateriness appearing along her lower eyelids.

“So does that mean you aren’t our Grandma?” she finally asked.

Kal’s eyes widened at the thought, while Aloy swallowed heavily, a momentary flash of something like sadness flashing through her eyes before she wrapped her arm fully around Lani’s shoulders.

“Of course I am,” she said firmly. “We share just as much blood as you do with your mother. Look at our faces, our hair…”

Aloy lifted the tip of a strand from her own shoulder, Lani’s eyes following her motion.

“You don’t get all of this just by chance. More importantly, though, the love I feel for you two, and your mother and her sisters, is too strong to not be family.”

The elder redhead paused for a moment, her gaze turning to meet Anukai’s as the younger woman’s lips began to pull into a small smile.

“As your mother would leap into action in a heartbeat for either of you, I would for her… as well as for you, two,” Aloy finished, turning back to glance between Lani and Kal as she wrapped her arm around the boy’s shoulders, as well, pulling both of them closer into her sides.

Anukai’s grin broadened even as she felt a full, warm feeling pushing at the inside of her ribcage, watching as Lani quickly turned to wrap her arms around Aloy’s middle, pressing her cheek against the elder woman’s side.

“So does that make you Mama’s mom?”

The older redhead paused, turning her gaze from Lani to Anukai, a questioning look in her eyes as the women’s gaze locked. Finally, Anukai took a deep breath, pressing her palms into her leggings for a moment before curling her hands into fists on her knees.

“Yes, she is, Lani,” she said, drawing her daughter’s gaze. “To me, yes. Auntie Ara and Auntie Ash might call it something else, but… but all three of us love Grandma. It might not be like everyone else, but we  _ are _ related and we  _ are _ a family.”

The small redhead smiled at her response, adjusting her grip about Aloy and nuzzling her cheek against the elder redhead’s side, once again. As Anukai’s smile began to grow, once again, she turned toward Kal to find him with a somewhat concerned expression, once again and her own expression began to fade slightly.

“What about Mommy and Nana?” he asked softly, his pale eyes looking to Anukai expectantly.

“Same idea,” the redhead said quickly, nodding. “Mommy didn’t live with Nana growing up, but they’re officially related now. It’s even in public record.”

Kal’s eyebrows lifted as Anukai felt her grin returning.

“It’s been there since Nana gave Mommy her house name, before you were born. She gave it to you, too, so you’re both officially in there.”

The dark-haired boy quickly adopted a smile, as well, as his posture finally seemed to relax, and he leaned into Aloy beside him, as well.

“So… Nana…  _ chose _ to become Mommy’s mom?” he asked.

Anukai smiled, shifting her position to sit cross-legged on the floor on the other side of the low table between them.

“She did, yeah,” she replied, nodding.

“And Nana was so happy that your Mommy felt the same,” Aloy added, squeezing Kal against her for a moment as he made a half-hearted sound in protest.

“Wait, so you can just choose?!” Lani chimed in, sitting up straight beside her grandmother as her eyes widened.

“You can, and I have,” Anukai confirmed, nodding again.

“As have I,” Aloy added, drawing the younger woman’s gaze as the two of them exchanged small smiles of their own before the elder redhead suddenly seemed to have a revelation and glanced between the children, once again. “Do you want to see something?”

“What, Grandma?”

“Maybe some more proof about all of us as family.”

The children quickly sat up, looking expectantly to Aloy as the elder woman grinned and pulled her Focus from beside her ear. Placing it on the table before her, she tapped the outside of it twice, bringing a small globe made of light to life in the air above it. Aloy quickly tapped through several icons and images until she reached a section that seemed to be a floating ring of square images. Lani and Kal slid forward on the couch, leaning in toward them as their grandmother spun through them until she came to a stop at one, in particular, grinning as she tapped it.

A moment later, the image grew larger, becoming easily visible while the others in the ring disappeared. Anukai rose from her seat across from the others to slide in beside Kal, moving to wrap her left arm behind him before hesitating. A moment later, however, he glanced over and slid into the crook of her arm, prompting her to grin and gently bring her hand to rest against the cushion below them, completing the semicircle around him. As her gaze focused on the image, she found it was of a woman about ten years older than her with vibrant, copper hair, cut short above her shoulders, shaking hands with a silver-haired man with a large beard, both of them smiling as they faced whoever had taken the image.

“Who’s that, Grandma?” Lani asked, leaning forward slightly to point at the woman. “Is that your mom? You look like her.”

Aloy smiled sadly for a moment before clearing her throat.

“That’s… her name is—was—Elisabet Sobeck. She’s… an ancestor of yours.”

Anukai felt a tightness forming in her throat and she swallowed against it, glancing over Kal’s head toward the older redhead and noting how her jaw was clenched tightly. The younger woman carefully moved her left hand, pressing the back of her fingers gently against her side, prompting her to glance over at Anukai, who offered her a small smile.

The elder redhead returned it, before clearing her throat and turning back to the image before them.

“What’s a ancestor?” Lani asked.

As she spoke, the older woman flipped to another image, this time showing Elisabet standing before some kind of stone banister, a familiar woman with a light blue scarf wrapped about her head standing beside her, both of them smiling and holding thin glasses filled with some kind of golden, fizzy liquid in their hands.

“It means family from a long time ago,” Anukai answered, adjusting her position to lean forward slightly and point toward the new image of Elisabet. “See how I look like her?”

Lani glanced at her mother curiously before turning back to the image, only to repeat this several more times, her eyes narrowing slightly.

“You know how much Grandma and I look alike, and me and Auntie Ara and Auntie Ash… so you see, we’ve got quite the lineage.”

As Lani nodded in agreement, Anukai glanced toward the older woman beside her, finding her with an unreadable expression in her eyes as she stared back at her. Anukai raised her eyebrows in question and the silver-streaked redhead blinked rapidly, as if to clear a daze, and offered a small, quick smile before turning back to the images.

As she swiped to the next one, it revealed two figures, both women seemingly about Anukai’s age. One was clearly Elisabet, with her undeniable resemblance and bright, copper hair, while the other wasn’t quite so familiar, with short, brown hair that reminded Anukai of the style Ikrie had worn at the time they had begun their venture out of the Cut.

“She looks even more like Mama, there!” Kal said quickly, glancing between the images.

“Looks like this was when she was my age, so would make sense,” Anukai replied, grinning as she squeezed Kal against her for a moment.

The next photo revealed another pair, although this time they both sported red hair. The older woman was not Elisabet, Anukai noted, but she quickly recognized the face and she felt a sudden wave of a heavy warmth roll over her. Swallowing, she glanced toward the elder redhead beside her to find her biting down on her lower lip, seemingly in an attempt to hide the slight tremble in it.

“She’s got red hair like Mama and Grandma and Elisabet, too!” Lani said quickly, pointing to the woman in the photo.

“And you, Lani,” Anukai added quickly, smirking.

“Mine’s a different color,” the girl said, pulling some of it in front of her and staring at it for a moment. “I like yours, though. It’s brighter.”

“Yours is just a little darker, like Mommy’s and Kal’s,” Anukai replied, reaching with her right hand to ruffle the boy’s hair to a quiet whine of protest.

“Yours also reminds me of the deepest beginning of a sunrise, though,” the silver-streaked redhead said, turning to Lani and tilting her head slightly to lean down toward her, “when the sun’s just about to come over the horizon, and the sky’s just starting to turn from black and blue.”

“Really?” Lani replied, looking up to her with slightly widened eyes.

“Mhm,” she nodded. “It’s different, but it’s still beautiful, and I like it.”

The small girl beamed and laughed as she wriggled against the older woman’s side, once again, leaning her head against her.

“Who is she, though?” Lani asked, pointing to the image, again.

“Her name is Miriam,” the elder redhead said softly, turning back to the image, as well. “She’s Elisabet’s mother.”

Anukai’s gaze remained on the woman beside her, even as Lani and Kal kept their focus on the image, asking about the black robe and strange, square hat that a noticeably younger Elisabet was wearing in the image. As she spoke, Anukai slowly began to connect the words and the voice with a place outside of the current room, with a strange, metal ship on an endless ocean and at a ruined, wooden house in the desert.

As she blinked slowly, she refocused on Elisabet beside her as she talked, listening to her talk about Miriam and a younger version of herself, in the third person, while she found more images of the two of them at Lani and Kal’s behest. As Anukai glanced between the images of the Ancient World and the redheaded women from it and the two redheads beside her, her gaze quickly focused on the images of Miriam and Lani before her, now.

Other than the hair, she had noted that her daughter had just enough differences from her to not simply appear to be an exact copy, as she had long found solace in, along with Ara, in particular. As she compared the images of Miriam and Lani, however, she began to make more and more connections, not just in how Miriam appeared somewhat different from Elisabet, but in how Lani and the ancestral Sobeck matriarch shared their own similarities. She could see it in the shape of their noses, the slightly narrower shape of their faces…

She blinked away her daze as she noticed Lani suddenly reach forward, running her fingers along the outline of the image of Miriam’s face in the last photo Elisabet had shown her.

“See?” the elder redhead said. “Your hair is darker, but I think otherwise you’re a good fit.”

Lani nodded thoughtfully, sitting back on the couch with a sigh.

“I wish I could meet her.”

Immediately, a tight feeling wrapped around Anukai’s heart as she glanced toward Elisabet beside her, noting how she had given up on hiding the tremble in her lip as she turned back to the image, the first hints of wateriness forming in the corners of her eyes.

“Me, too, kiddo… me, too…”

A few moments later, the elder redhead cleared her throat and swiped the image, once again revealing one of two nearly identical faces. Anukai quickly realized that the setting and clothing had changed drastically, as well, and she grinned as she turned from the image of her and Aloy to her daughter.

“Look at that, now, Lani,” she said. “See? Grandma and me?”

The small redhead sat up as she stared at the image of the two redheads shortly after returning to Meridian from the west, Anukai notably keeping Aloy to her right and her left arm partially held behind her. Compared to the previous images, however, the resemblance between the two figures was much similar.

“You look just like Grandma!” Lani said, glancing between the image of Aloy and Anukai quickly. “And ancestor lady!”

“It’s almost like we’re all related,” the younger woman teased, smirking as her daughter laughed.

Glancing toward the display above the Focus, Anukai quickly noted the time displayed above image and cleared her throat, patting Kal on his shoulder.

“It’s almost dinnertime, so why don’t you two clean up and get ready, okay?”

The kids moaned in protest, but their mother simply gave them a stern look.

“Grandma might even stay, but only if you—”

Before she even finished, the children had whirled to the older woman, staring up at her.

“Stay for dinner Grandma! Please!”

“Well, you convinced me,” she sighed, smirking. “Mind if I invite Nana, too?”

“Yes! Yes!”

“Well, you two do what your mother asked and I’ll let her know.”

The children suddenly leapt from the couch, grabbing their things from the afternoon and rushing to put them back away. The women exchanged glances, shaking their heads and laughing softly as Lani and Kal tore off toward their rooms, leaving them alone and in a sudden quiet that hadn’t been felt all afternoon.

“I’m… so sorry about all of that,” Anukai sighed, sliding closer to the older redhead and smiling apologetically.

“It’s fine,” she replied, shrugging. “They were bound to start asking soon, so it’s probably about time we start explaining…”

“Can… can we let them get just a little older before explaining everything?” Anuaki asked, frowning slightly. “They’re still so young, and…”

“I understand,” Aloy interrupted, smiling softly. “They’re inquisitive, though.”

“Yeah… definitely…” the younger woman sighed, running one hand over her hair before clasping both of them in her lap, her right thumb absentmindedly running over the smooth metal of her left hand’s fingertips. “Did… did you really mean that—what you said about choosing?”

Anukai’s voice was small, seeming to only exist between the two women on the couch, although the words hung in the air for several long moments, neither of them daring to disturb them quite yet.

“You know I… I didn’t just give you the title of Grandma for—for them, right?” Anukai continued, just as softly. “I’ve always… hoped it… implied the right thing about… about you and… me.”

When she finally met Aloy’s gaze, again, she found a look of worry on the older woman’s face as she turned to face her on the couch.

“Are… are we not…?” Anukai asked, her voice almost seeming to die in her throat so that the words barely reached the other woman.

“Anukai, can I show you something?” Aloy replied, her voice also soft but with a weight of certainty.

She nodded, prompting the older redhead to reach for her right hand, taking it in both of hers and holding it atop her knee. Almost immediately, the living room before Anukai seemed to disappear, replaced with a rapidly changing series of images.

She saw another living room with the crestfallen face of a young Talanah beside her, the sounds of what seemed to be her own sobs ringing in her ears. Red marks coated her palms and fingers, the blood that had once run from them having already dried.

With a blink, the image changed, however, to that of a young redhead, leaning against a stone banister. She immediately recognized the Banuk clothing and the tight braid as herself, and a strange feeling ran down her spine, only to be replaced quickly with a feeling of lightness that bubbled in her chest, her lips seeming to tug into a faint smile, on their own.

Another blink replaced the Palace balcony with a familiar metal hallway bathed in harsh, fluorescent lights. Her gaze quickly swung around as she seemed to turn on her heel, bringing a now older Talanah into view, the Carja offering a sympathetic look as she gripped her shoulders.

“It’s okay—she’ll be okay—you heard Ara…”

“I have to  _ see _ her, Tal! To know!”

With another blink, the image changed to another image of herself, once again, as she drew closer, watching her hand come to rest on her younger image’s shoulder before pulling her into an embrace that she slowly returned, although notably only with her right arm.

“Why do you feel that way about me?” Anukai’s own voice croaked in her ear. “Why do you feel like you owe all that to someone you just met?”

She watched her arms move to hold her younger self at arm’s length, her gaze meeting the familiar reflection of the gold-green eyes across from her.

“Because… because part of me felt like… once I knew who you were… I was confused, sure, but… it was like… something missing had found its way back into my life.”

Another blink revealed a slightly older image of herself, this time standing across from Ikrie, the two of them dressed in simple, but vibrantly colored dresses that flowed about their feet, the image of herself much more capably using her left arm to hold one of her mate’s hands between them. She felt an intensely warm feeling building in her chest as someone squeezed her right hand reassuringly.

“Who represents Anukai in an offering to this union?” the Sun Priest behind the younger images of herself and Ikrie asked.

“I do,” her voice echoed in her ears, although it bore the hints of age that she was not used to hearing from her own lips. “I, Aloy Sobeck, represent Anukai as her family, to offer her in this union.”

Another blink exchanged the early-twenties image of a redhead with a tiny, newborn one, her eyes still closed, hiding the grey-hazel irises she knew lay behind her pale eyelids. She could feel hot tears running down her cheeks as she sank into a seat on the edge of a bed, her gaze turning to an exhausted, sweat-covered image of herself beside her, watching as one arm wrapped around her shoulders securely before her gaze turned back to the tiny Lani held in a bundle of blankets atop her chest. Despite the tears and the trembling she saw in her fingers as they reached toward the bundle, the all-encompassing, warm feeling that spread throughout her limbs had never felt more secure.

“Hi little Talanah, I’m so happy to meet you.”

With a final blink, the image of the silver-streaked Aloy appeared before her, once again, a warm smile on her lips even as her eyes appeared red and watery.

“I know what we are,” she said softly, barely louder than a whisper.

Anukai felt as if the breath had been sucked from her chest, her eyes widening as her heart began to pound in her ears. Finally, she gave in to the sensation building behind her ribcage and sliding in closer to wrap her arms tightly around Aloy. The older woman reciprocated the gesture almost immediately, gripping Anukai tightly to her as the younger woman buried her face in the shoulder of Aloy’s tunic. The younger redhead’s shoulders began to shake with silent sobs until she felt Aloy’s grip shift, one hand lifting to slowly run over her hair.

Despite the braid it was tied into, the sensation was immediately apparent and she felt an overwhelming sense of calm begin to settle into her, stilling the sobs, and relaxing her grip about the older woman slightly, although she refused to fully release her.

“When did you know?” she managed, her voice muffled by the dark blue fabric before her.

“I had a… feeling… of what we could be for a while,” Aloy began, continuing to slowly run her hand over Anukai’s hair, but I knew—finally, without a doubt—when you called Meridian home.”

Anukai paused for a moment before turning her head to the side slightly to speak more clearly.

“Outside the Port?”

“Mhm,” Aloy hummed, nodding.

“That… that long ago?”

“You told me we were a werak of four when we left,” the older woman replied. “So…”

Anukai’s smile broadened as she turned to nuzzle her face into her mother’s shoulder, once again, inhaling the scent of her tunic deeply as she redoubled her grip about her, once again.

The feeling that had come over her felt familiar, although she couldn’t quite place it at first. It wasn’t surprise, or even an unfamiliarity with contact between them, but it seemed to stem from it. It settled heavily in her chest, and compelled her to maintain her grip, although with care from her left arm.

A moment later, it hit her.

It was a shared feeling, but not in the way that she had shared feelings with Aloy that afternoon.

Or the way that she shared feelings with Lani so frequently.

It was an understanding that she had felt it in one of those moments before, however.

Her lips began to pull into a smile as she turned to lay her cheek on Aloy’s shoulder.

This feeling, she’d glimpsed it from Lani.

She understood it, now, fully.

She understood how Lani felt with her.

She felt it now with Aloy.


	22. Somewhere I Belong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

Ikrie raised her eyebrows at Kal as he grinned and laughed at her through the arm hole of his sleep shirt that had been refusing to put on for the past several minutes. The dark-haired boy seemed in no hurry to obey her request, prompting her to sigh heavily, bracing her hands on her hips.

“My patience is beginning to wear thin, Kallik…”

“What? I put it on like you asked!”

Rolling her eyes, Ikrie stepped forward, yanking the clothing over his head to a surprised yelp from the dark-haired boy. A moment later, she had spun the garment in the correct orientation, pulling it quickly down over his head, and pinning his arms to his sides. Kal let out a sound of protest, attempting to wriggle free in his clothing, while his mother smirked.

“Looks like that fixed it,” she said.

“No fair! My… arms are stuck…”

“Well, then that just makes it easy for me to do this—”

Ikrie suddenly scooped the young boy off the ground, lifting him onto the bed behind him and dropping him onto the mattress as he attempted to protest, but his laughter betrayed him between his cries to release his arms. Once he was lying atop the blanket, Ikrie raised her eyebrows down at him.

“You promise to wear your shirt the right way, now?”

He continued to grin, but nodded, prompting Ikrie to help pull him into a sitting position. A few moments later, the shirt was on him normally, and he shook out his arms slightly, the clothing settling into place.

“I don’t want to have to take away a Stormbird’s wings,” the dark-haired woman said, “but if he gives me no choice…”

“I won’t again, I promise,” Kal said quickly, flashing a large, toothy grin as Ikrie’s face cracked into a smile of her own.

A moment later, he had thrown himself at her, wrapping his arms around her as she returned the embrace, carefully reaching to run her fingers through his shaggy, dark hair.

“You need this cut sometime soon,” she said softly.

“No, I like it,” Kal whined, squeezing her tighter. “Everyone else has long hair…”

Ikrie paused for a moment, a warm, tight feeling wrapping about her heart as she smiled softly and ran her fingers through her son’s hair, once again.

“Okay, you have a point…”

Finally, she convinced him to lay down beneath his blanket, his pale eyes blinking slowly as the fatigue began to set in and his energy rapidly waned. Ikrie brushed some errant locks of hair from his forehead as she grinned, leaning down to place a soft kiss to the top of this head.

“Goodnight, Kallik. Sleep well.”

He murmured something that sounded like a goodnight wish, as well, before his eyes finally drifted closed and he exhaled slowly, adjusting his position slightly against his pillow. Ikrie carefully made her way to the door to his room, glancing back before tapping at her Focus and deactivating the small, electric lamp on Kal’s bedside that remained illuminating the room, currently.

As his door closed softly behind her, she let out a heavy sigh, rubbing at her own eyes tiredly and turning toward the end of the hallway, and her own bedroom. The door was already open as she approached, and as she slipped inside, she found she wasn’t the first to have entered. Anukai was just pulling on her sleep shirt before their bureau on the far side of the room, her back to the doorway. Ikrie carefully slunk across the room, sliding up behind her mate as she began to undo the loose braid in her hair.

Wordlessly, the dark-haired woman took hold of the tie at the end of the length of copper hair, pulling it free as Anukai started in surprise, turning her head to look over her shoulder slightly, and further freeing the cascade of red hair from its former shape.

“I didn’t even hear you walk in,” she said.

“Guess I’m coming for your title as the best hunter,” Ikrie purred, grinning.

Anukai rolled her eyes as her mate tossed the tie onto the top of a small dresser beside the bureau. With her hands free, she turned to instead run her fingers as gently as she could through her mate’s hair, trying to free it from some of the small ties and knots that remained. Anukai quickly fell still, however, inclining her chin slightly as Ikrie noted the tension in her posture melt away.

With her work as complete as she figured it would be, without actually causing any sort of pain and tugging at the redhead’s hair, Ikrie sighed deeply, pressing forwarding and wrapping her arms about her mate’s middle as she pressed her face into the somewhat wild mane of copper hair before her.

“Finally got him to sleep?” Anukai asked softly.

“Finally,” Ikrie confirmed, turning to press a soft kiss against the redhead’s shoulder.

“With everything else, you’d think it’d be Lani who doesn’t want to sleep, ever,” she quipped.

“You’d think…”

“He’s always hated it, it seems.”

“Oh, I know.”

Ikrie turned to lay her cheek against the back of her mate’s shoulder, tightening her embrace about her for a moment.

“I’ve known even before I could see those big, bright eyes that threaten to make me give in to his nonsense.”

Anukai laughed softly, the sound reverberating through her back and into Ikrie’s chest. A moment later, Ikrie pressed one more kiss against her shoulder before releasing her mate and beginning to change her clothing, as well. Once she had pulled on her own sleep shirt, she slid over to their bed, crawling onto it before burrowing into her mate’s side, wrapping one arm tightly across her chest as she brought her cheek to rest on her shoulder.

“How was the trip?” Anukai asked, wrapping her right arm beneath her mate and reaching up to run her own fingers through Ikrie’s hair, in turn.

“Long… and we didn’t learn anything new,” the dark-haired woman sighed. “Still have no idea why we keep finding machines that don’t respond to any of GAIA’s codes.”

“They’re still just the normal ones, though?” the redhead replied. “Not… like the ones we saw… you know…?”

“No, can’t see any physical modifications,” Ikrie shook her head. “We took a few of their hearts back for Aloy and GAIA to review, though.”

Anukai nodded slowly, but fell silent as Ikrie sighed, squeezing her mate slightly.

“I missed you,” the dark-haired woman said softly. “All of you.”

“We did, too,” Anukai replied. “Maybe that’s why Kal wouldn’t sleep.”

“Hmm?”

“Too excited to see you.”

Ikrie grinned sleepily as she adjusted her position slightly. Her eyes began to drift closed, the warmth of her mate and the softness of their bed calling her to sleep, however she heard Anukai clear her throat gently, and she forced her eyes open, once again, sensing that the redhead’s body language had changed, as well.

“Is… do you think it’s still… safe… outside the city?”

Ikrie’s brow creased in concern as she tilted her head to brace her chin on Anukai’s shoulder, staring over at her mate’s gold-green eyes.

“They’re all only appearing far from here,” she said, “in remote locations, you know that.”

The redhead swallowed nervously, but nodded. Ikrie attempted to smile reassuringly as she lifted her hand that had previously wrapped around her mate’s side to card through her hair slowly.

“You’re worried about them, I know,” she said softly.

“I am, and… we’ve done so much to make… to make everything better… for them, and for… for everyone… to make it safer…”

“And all of that hasn’t been erased,” Ikrie said quietly but firmly. “They’ll figure it out. GAIA built all of them, anyway.”

Anukai attempted to smile and nod in response, but it seemed incredibly unconvincing, prompting Ikrie to frown. A moment later, she pulled herself forward, turning her mate’s face toward her with one hand as she placed an insistent kiss against her. When they pulled apart a few moments later, Ikrie pressed her forehead against Anukai’s, closing her eyes as she ran her fingers through her mate’s hair slowly.

“We’ll all be okay.”

She heard Anukai laugh softly, before the redhead turned her head to place a soft kiss against her, in return. Despite the fatigue of earlier, Ikrie felt the redhead’s motions begin to grow more insistent, and she quickly found her limbs coming back to life with each heartbeat, the steadily increasing tempo only accelerating the process.

Soon, hands were pulling at cotton sleep shirts, and roving across warm skin, grabbing, pressing, and pulling insistently. For several minutes, Ikrie only saw a blur of red, green, brown, and black as the warmth and pressure seemed to roll and cascade around her. Finally, the motion settled, although the warmth remained. She could feel her cheek resting atop a sweat-soaked patch of skin, while Anukai’s lips pressed against the crown of her head.

In what felt like a blink later, the darkness of the bedroom had been burned away by pink and gold morning light pouring through the windows on either side of the bed, but the sensations remained. With a slow grin, she attempted to close her eyes, once again, as her mate remained still, her breathing even in sleep.

Just then, however, she heard the telltale signs of small feet in the hallway outside and her eyes shot open. As they reached the doorway across from her, she quickly reached for the edge of the blanket on the opposite side of Anukai, but as she tugged on it, she realized that it was trapped beneath her sleeping mate. The sound of the door handle turning prompted her to make a last-minute decision and suddenly grip the blanket tightly, while also trapping the redhead in her grasp, under her arm, and pull them both toward her, using her weight as she threw herself onto her back.

The motion suddenly brought a tangle of redhead and blankets crashing atop her to a surprised yelp and sudden thrashing of limbs in panic. Ikrie squeezed her eyes shut and grimaced as some part of Anukai dug into her hip, but the redhead at least quickly slowed her struggling.

“What in the…?”

“Mamas! Morning Mamas!”

Ikrie’s eyes opened to find Anukai’s staring down at her, wide at the sound of the small voices from across the room. Both of them whirled their heads toward the sound, but Ikrie’s vision was blocked by her mate’s hair suddenly falling in her face.

“Lani! Kal! What have we told you about knocking before entering someone else’s room?!”

The children muttered apologies as Anukai sighed, pulling her hair back so it fell over one shoulder and allowing Ikrie to finally see. As she did, she found that her last-minute ploy had been mostly successful, as the blanket covered them from their shoulders to their calves, although she was still thankful that the children didn’t know enough to make presumptions about why Anukai was now braced over her, with no sleep shirt visible on the backs of her shoulders.

“We… we just… Mommy’s back and we thought… we’d…” Kal attempted to explain, hanging his head slightly.

“We’re all excited, I know,” Anukai sighed. “Why don’t you two start getting things together for Mommy’s favorite breakfast, and we’ll be out there in a couple minutes to get it started, okay?”

The children seemed to perk up at that, quickly nodding and tearing out of the room, once again. Breathing a heavy sigh of relief, Anukai turned back to her mate before collapsing her weight atop her, prompting a playful grunt from Ikrie as she half-heartedly protested the weight.

“Fast thinking,” the redhead muttered.

“Fear will do that.”

They both laughed as Anukai lifted herself with her hands braced just above her mate’s shoulders, grinning down at her before placing a quick kiss on her.

“Let’s not get carried away and cause another incident, hmm?” Ikrie hummed as they pulled apart.

Her mate laughed, but nodded in agreement. A minute later, they had thrown the blanket aside and quickly pulled on cotton sleep shirts and shorts, as well as Carja silk robes that had finally replaced the ones given to them at their wedding. Sufficiently dressed, they exchanged one more, slow kiss before Anukai led her dark-haired mate into the living space of the apartment. When they entered, they found the ingredients for breakfast lined up on the counter, while Lani was attempting to slide the heavy, cast-iron skillet onto the stove, herself.

Anukai quickly rushed forward, helping her get it in place, while Ikrie noted thankfully that the flames for the stove had not yet been lit. While the redheads were working with the skillet, however, Kal had turned to rush forward, wrapping his arms firmly about Ikrie’s waist and pressing his cheek against her stomach.

“Morning, Mommy,” he said.

“Good morning, Kallik,” she replied, ruffling his hair gently. “You’ve got a lot of energy for someone who didn’t want to sleep last night.”

“I slept good after that,” he said, lifting his head to look up at her with a toothy grin, his pale eyes bright in the morning light.

“Well good,” she nodded, grinning.

“Did you sleep good, Mommy?”

“Very well, mhm,” she hummed, leading him toward the kitchen, once again. “I always sleep best here at home.”

Kal beamed at her response, but quickly released his hold around her and set about trying to help Anukai and Lani. At several points during the process, he tried to step over what his sister was doing and take charge, instead, which led to some minor squabbling before one of their mothers broke it up with a few insistent words.

Finally, breakfast was finished and served, with Kal placing himself in the seat directly beside Ikrie as they ate. Over their plates of omelets filled with roast boar, onions, and tomatoes, the dark-haired boy excitedly began to recap the past several days, while Ikrie remained mostly silent, glancing over at him with a small smile on her face as he talked. Lani provided some details, as well, however Kal notably dominated the conversation, and somehow still managed to eat his food, as well.

When he finally finished, Ikrie nodded, laughing softly.

“I’m gone for four days and all this happens? Maybe I’m the boring one,” she quipped.

“No you’re not!” Kal said quickly. “It just… happened by accident.”

Ikrie grinned, reaching over to rub his back reassuringly.

“I know, Kallik.”

Once the plates were cleared, the mothers ordered the children to take baths, to much groaning and whining, however Anukai managed to convince them by asking them if they wanted to be “so filthy and smelly” for Ikrie when she just got home. While they trudged off to clean up and change clothes, the women took seats on their couch, with Ikrie cradling her mug of coffee and Anukai sipping at her steaming tea.

“Sounds like you’ve had quite the eventful time,” the dark-haired woman smirked, glancing over at her mate.

“Could say that…” Anukai sighed.

Ikrie took a sip of her coffee before carefully adjusting her position so her back leaned against Anukai’s shoulder, her feet stretching out across the couch beside them.

“So, Aloy told them about Elisabet?”

She felt Anukai shift slightly behind her and she tilted her head back and to the side to see her better.

“Not all about her… in… in that way,” the redhead replied, staring down into her own mug. “She told them her name, what she did, and that she was an ancestor, but… that’s about it.”

Ikrie nodded thoughtfully, turning back to her drink as she sipped at it carefully.

“Anything else is… too much for their age,” Anukai said softly.

“I understand,” Ikrie replied. “We were… much older than them when we first started to find out and… well, it still took me a while to fully grasp it.”

“You weren’t even in the thick of all that,” the redhead laughed softly.

“No, but I was with you so… as close as I could be.”

A moment later, Anukai’s arm wrapped about her middle and squeezed her reassuringly against her side as Ikrie felt her lean her head against hers gently. Both of them remained still in their positions for a minute or so before the redhead inhaled deeply, shifting slightly against her mate’s back.

“I feel a little bad, though.”

“Why?” Ikrie replied.

“Lani… heard all of these things about Aloy, me, Ara, Ash, Elisabet… but Kal just… had to sit there and stare at these images of red-haired people who looked nothing like him while… while everyone said they were family…”

Ikrie frowned slightly as carefully began to turn in her seat, adopting a more normal position as her mate’s hand slid from lying across her stomach to coming to rest on her side, just above her hip.

“Was he upset?” she asked softly, turning to meet the redhead’s eyes directly.

“He… he didn’t seem it, but… he barely spoke,” Anukai replied. “I… you know him, too…”

The dark-haired woman’s frown refused to fade as she tapped her fingers on the outside of her mug.

“Ikrie, do… do you know if… if Talanah has anything… of her family?”

She blinked at the question, her expression suddenly shifting to something like surprise before her brow furrowed in thought.

“I-I don’t know…” Ikrie replied. “I haven’t asked too much. She… she’s shown me a few things, but…”

They both fell silent as the dark-haired woman’s eyebrows raised.

“I’ll give her a quick call.”

Ikrie checked her small travelling bag for what felt like the millionth time as Kal continued to mime motions of firing a bow with a stick he had found lying beneath the tree at the edge of the dirt road into the heavily forested and humid land to the south of Meridian. The dark-haired woman’s nervous preparations were interrupted by the sound of heavy, mechanical footsteps and a voice suddenly calling out from her left, prompting her head to snap up from the bag to the approaching trail.

“I assure you, as a venerated hunter and former Sunhawk of the Hunter’s Lodge in Meridian that I come in peace!”

A smirk tugged at her lips as Kal whirled around at the sound of Talanah’s voice, as well, a broad grin tugging at his lips.

“Nana!”

The Carja brought her Strider to a stop several yards away, raising one eyebrow as she loosely held its wires before her.

“Do you accept my offering of peace?” she replied.

“Of course!”

Talanah nodded resolutely before grinning and sliding off her mount. Once she was on the ground, she took a few steps forward before kneeling down and holding her arms wide. Without another word, Kal rushed forward, wrapping her in a tight embrace as the Carja returned it. When they broke apart a few moments later, Talanah playfully ruffled his shaggy hair before rising to her feet with a quiet groan.

“Wasn’t expecting you to have time so soon,” Ikrie said as they approached the tree, swinging her travelling bag behind her back.

“I’m more or less retired,” the Carja shrugged. “I’ve achieved the perfect level in the Lodge and at the Palace where I can almost do whatever I want, when I want.”

Ikrie smirked as she raised her eyebrows.

“Thought that was what you did, anyway?”

Talanah laughed heartily as she approached, wrapping the younger woman in a warm embrace, as well. Ikrie returned it, taking care not to squeeze the Carja’s left side too much.

“This felt important,” Talanah whispered in her ear.

“Thank you,” Ikrie replied, just as softly.

With that, they pulled apart, the Carja holding her at arm’s length and patting her shoulder affectionately for a moment before clearing her throat and turning to Kal beside them, who seemed to almost be bouncing with energy.

“You ready for today, my little man?” Talanah asked.

“Mommy said we’re going on an adventure!” he replied, nodding.

“Oh, we most certainly are. We’re going to visit an ancient place… one that holds great importance.”

“Really?” he replied, eyes widening. “Like a ruin?”

“Almost like one,” she nodded. “You ready? It’s going to be a little bit of a ride.”

Kal nodded, prompting the women to exchange glances.

“We’ll follow you,” Ikrie said, nodding toward the Strider she had brought with them that stood grazing nearby.

“Let’s hope I still remember the way,” Talanah quipped, smirking.

“I can assist if need be,” GAIA’s voice suddenly chimed on their Focuses.

“I know, I know, GAIA,” the Carja sighed in faux exasperation. “I think I’ve got it, though.”

“As always, Talaanh,” the AI woman replied, a playful lilt to her voice.

Once everyone was aboard their mounts, with Ikrie keeping Kal before her in the Strider’s saddle, tying a short length of rope about his middle and her waist for safety, Talanah led the way farther into the lush forest ahead of them, guiding her mount down the worn, dirt path that burrowed deeper into the greenery ahead of them.

“Do you know what this place is called?” Ikrie asked, glancing down at Kal before her.

“It’s… the Jewel?” he said tentatively.

“That’s right,” his mother nodded. “What’s different about it than on the other side of Meridian?”

“It’s… there’s a lot of trees,” he said, glancing around.

“Mhm, and what’s that make it?”

His face contorted in thought for a few moments as Ikrie grinned.

“A forest,” he finally replied.

“Mhm,” the dark-haired woman hummed.

“This is a special kind of forest, though,” Talanah called from a yard or so ahead of them. “It’s sometimes called a  _ rain _ forest, do you know why?”

“Because it rains a lot?” Kal replied.

“It does rain a good amount,” the Carja nodded, glancing over her shoulder toward them, “but also can you feel how wet the air is, right now?”

The dark-haired boy nodded.

“This whole forest is soaked with moisture—with water—and that means you can see very different types of plants and animals out here than the forests to the north,” Talanah continued.

The next hour or so of their ride passed with both women quizzing Kal on various things they saw, while also pointing out new things that weren’t as easily found in the city bustle of Meridian. Finally, however, Talanah signaled from them to stop and Ikrie slowed their mount to a halt.

“I believe… we’re here,” the Carja said slowly. “Everything looks a lot more overgrown, now…”

“I can confirm that you are in the correct location,” GAIA chimed in, once again.

Talanah visibly drew a deep breath before glancing over her shoulder to Ikrie and Kal.

“We walk from here.”

With that, they carefully dismounted, leaving their Striders to graze in a nearby patch of leafy plants. Talanah led the way forward into the underbrush ahead of them, Kal turning in place as he walked to take in the towering trees and plant life about them. Ikrie’s eyes continued to scan the nearby underbrush, searching for any signs of threatening motion, while her right hand always remained close to her belt, where she had holstered a single, black metal weapon just in case.

As they approached a particularly thick patch of underbrush, Talanah yet again signaled for them to stop, before drawing a long, broad blade from a sheath at her hip.

“Figured this might be the case… I’ll get us through this in just a minute,” she called back to them.

Ikrie nodded, waiting several yards back with Kal as Talanah swung the blade, which she had heard called a  _ machete _ by several merchants, at the thick patch of branches and leaves. Slowly but surely, she began to hack away the blockage, until she was able to push a path through it all, sighing heavily and wiping at her brow with the back of her left hand.

“Okay, follow me through this way!”

With that, Ikrie urged Kal forward, bringing up the rear as they made their way through the scratchy, often sap-soaked branches and leaves until they finally exited onto much more open ground. As they did, she heard Kal gasp and she glanced up before her own eyes widened. The narrow, overgrown path between the two rock formations they had just passed had given way to a rather wide clearing in a vaguely circular shape. The ground was still largely covered with greenery, but large swaths of it were suspiciously clear of trees.

The reason, Ikrie, suspected, had to do with the large, stone building at the far side of the clearing. It was clearly not ancient in design, but it also was unlike many of the buildings she was used to in Meridian. Hints of what had once been ornate, gold plating on stone carved to mimic leaves and branches appeared at the corners of the building, with a few even stretching across the front, although the bright, metallic coating had worn off in many places.

Like many of the ancient ruins Ikrie had seen and explored, vines and plant life were well on their way to attempting to reclaim the structure, and she noted that quite a few of the windows seemed to be missing anything resembling glass panes. At first, she wondered if they had never had them, but as several on the upper levels still sported them, she had a feeling they were simply missing.

The building, itself, appeared to be about three stories tall, and as long as half of the city block where they lived. The roof was made of the same, undeniably Carja tiles as almost every building in Meridian, but she noted a few places where holes seemed to have formed, revealing the hints of the wooden structures beneath.

The single building was impressive, on its own, however it was not the only one in the clearing, as a smaller, squatter stone building sat along the rock wall to their right. It bore no signs of the gold plating of the larger structure, and all of its windows were missing their glass panes. A wooden roof extended from one side of the stone building, seemingly having once been some kind of stables or storage shed, although little remained beneath it, other than a half-destroyed wooden fence.

The left side of the clearing sported much more greenery, including large trees with thick canopies that provided rather dark shade from the midday sun that bore down on the rest of the open ground. Ikrie thought she saw signs of a wooden fence just past them, as well, but the amount of plant life that grew around it made it nearly impossible to discern the structure, from her current distance.

“What is this?” Kal asked incredulously, his pale eyes wide as he scanned over it all.

“This, little Kallik, is the former Khane Padish family estate.”

Ikrie’s eyes widened, as well, her gaze snapped back to Talanah, finding the Carja staring sadly at the large building in the distance before turning back to Kal and attempting to smile.

“Khane Padish… like your name? The one you chose to give Mommy?” he asked.

“That’s right,” Talanah nodded, stepping toward Kal and kneeling before him before gently poking him in the chest, “and you.”

“I’m… my name is Khane Padish, too?”

“Of course,” she said. “I passed it to your mother, and she in turn passes it to you.”

The dark-haired boy nodded slowly, his face contorted in thought.

“Kallik Khane Padish…” he said slowly.

“Sounds like a powerful name to me,” Talanah replied, “and so… I wanted you to see this, as it’s your history, too.”

Kal inclined his head slightly before nodding resolutely, prompting the Carja to grin and pat his shoulder before rising to her feet, once again. She exchanged a glance with Ikrie, prompting the younger woman to swallow heavily and offer a small nod, the unspoken sentiment that her statement applied to both of them hanging heavily in the air.

As they crossed the clearing, Kal asked about the smaller building, which Talanah explained was once a fieldhouse for storing equipment to help with growing food and to tend to her mother’s gardens. The overgrown area next to the trees that Ikrie had spotted earlier had apparently once been these gardens, which Talanah recounted memories of chasing her brother through when they were younger.

“You had a brother?” Kal asked excitedly, glancing up at her.

“I did,” she nodded. “Brativin. He was older than me.”

“Can I meet him someday?”

Talanah swallowed painfully before clearing her throat and turning to Kal, bringing him to a stop as she kneeled beside him.

“I so wish you could,” she said softly, Ikrie barely able to hear her from a few feet away, “but… he’s no longer with us, Kal.”

“Oh…” the boy said, hanging his head for a moment before he stepped forward, wrapping his arms around her neck. “I’m sorry, Nana.”

Talanah gently returned the embrace as she drew a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment.

“Thank you, Kal.”

A moment later, he released her and she held him by his shoulders, smiling softly.

“You remind me of him, in some ways,” she said.

“I do?”

She nodded.

“You’re smart, you always want to be a good hunter, and you can be a pain to your sister, sometimes.”

Kal laughed as Talanah smirked.

“Come on, let’s take a look inside.”

The boy nodded as the Carja rose to her feet, groaning softly and shaking her left leg slightly with a grimace, but Kal didn’t notice as he had already turned and begun to approach the former front doors of the large building. Ikrie silently slipped beside Talanah, placing a hand in the center of her back and glancing toward her with a small smile.

“He really does, in so many ways,” the Carja whispered.

“Yeah?”

“Even looks a little like him, too…”

Ikrie slid her arm fully around Talanah and squeezed her gently in a one-armed embrace before they made their way after Kal. The Carja led the way into the old building, first, to ensure that it wasn’t dangerous, but the ground floor had evidently been built of a hardy, stone surface, and later covered in tile, although a fair deal of it had come free with decades of abandonment.

The group glanced around the inside of the main hallway where they found themselves, noting that it seemed rather barren, with little to no furniture or decorations.

“I can imagine this place was cleaned out once… once there was no one here to defend it,” Talanah said slowly, “but there may still be some things that thieves didn’t want.”

“Like what?” Kal asked tentatively.

“Might be a few paintings around here,” she shrugged. “Can’t imagine some old portraits of random people are all that valuable to other people.”

“But they are to us!” he said firmly, nodding in confidence.

Talanah smiled softly down at Kal as Ikrie ruffled his hair.

“Yeah, Kal… they are to us.”

With that, she began to lead the way through the ground floor, pointing out the room that had once been a large sitting room filled with couches, tables, and books. While the shelves remained, their contents were long gone, along with the other, easier to carry furniture. A massive fireplace along the right wall still had a few pieces of wood beside it, although it had long since grown to be covered in mold and was not something anyone would consider burning.

They crossed a hallway into another room through a doorway that had once sported several large, glass panes in the center of it, as some of the shards still lay on the ground before it, prompting Ikrie to carefully boost Kal over it and onto the safer ground on the other side of the portal. Once inside, however, they glanced up to find that while the furniture was missing, as with the previous room, there was more left behind, as well.

Several large pieces of what appeared to be rolled parchment sat against the wall to the left, drawing their attention, in particular. Talanah moved over to them and grabbed one from the front of the pile. She carefully began to unroll it before turning to Ikrie and beckoning her over.

“Here, hold this side and I’ll carefully unroll it,” she said, offering the top edge to the younger woman.

She did as asked, holding the edge of what she quickly realized was a canvas while Talanah unfurled the painting. Ikrie tilted her head slightly to try to see the image on it more clearly, as from her position it appeared upside down. She could tell it was an image of a person, but not much else.

“Of course… the frames are worth shards, but the paintings aren’t…” Talanah muttered. “Let’s see if we can lay these out.”

The two of them set about unfurling the various paintings, using some of the items from their belts and travelling bags to hold the corners of the paintings in place on the floor. Once they were done, a collection of about six paintings covered the open ground in the former study.

“Come here, Kal,” Talanah said excitedly, waving him over to her side. “These are paintings of some of the Khane Padish line.”

“Our family?” he asked, glancing up at her.

The Carja paused for a moment before a broad grin began to overtake her features, Ikrie mimicking it as she stood on Kal’s other side.

“Our family,” Talanah nodded.

She began to point to each one in turn, explaining who they were and what they had done. The men in the paintings all had a similar history of being successful in the Hunter’s Lodge, and Talanah had stories of some of their most famous deeds and hunts, all of which Kal listened to with rapt attention. The women in the paintings, Ikrie noted, had less action-oriented deeds that were told of them, however Talanah still had stories of them working as diplomats and advisors, albeit with an edge to her tone whenever the tale came to a moment where she was sure the full story ended with another taking credit, although she seemed to leave these out when telling Kal.

Finally, the last painting was of four figures, and Ikrie noted that Talanah had avoided even looking at it the whole time, until Kal finally pointed.

“Who are they?”

The Carja guided him before it before kneeling down at his side, wrapping her arm right around his shoulders and pointing with her left to the dark-haired man and woman who appeared to be sitting on chairs somewhat facing each other, her hand held in his on top of a small table between them.

“These are  _ my _ parents, Kal,” she said softly. “Talavad and Zahra.”

She pointed to each of them in turn as the boy’s eyes widened, his gaze transfixed on their faces.

“And then behind them, there’s my brother, Brativin, when he was about seventeen years old,” she continued, pointing to the dark-haired teenage boy standing behind his father, one hand on the back of the chair before him, “and me, when I was about eleven, I think.”

Kal’s gaze lingered on Brativin for a moment before turning to the young Talanah.

“That’s you?” he asked incredulously, pointing to the image of the young girl in the painting, her raven hair loose and flowing across her shoulders, in contrast to her often tight, tied-back looks she wore so often.

“What, don’t believe me?” Talanah quipped. “I was young once, too.”

Kal stared at the painting for another moment or so longer, his eyes narrowed in thought.

“You remind me of Mommy,” he said.

Ikrie’s eyes widened as she felt her breath hitch in her throat. Her gaze quickly darted to Talanah to find the Carja still looking back at Kal, a smile tugging at her lips.

“Yeah, you think so?”

“Mhm,” Kal hummed. “Do you think I look like your brother or your father, too?”

“Well…” Talanah began, making a show of glancing at the painting before turning back to Kal, “you’ve got the hair like Brativin, especially. He always kept it messy when he was young, too.”

Ikrie felt the beginnings of hot tears forming in the corners of her eyes as she wiped at them quickly with the back of her hand, trying to hide the sudden change in her breathing as her heart pounded at the inside of her ribcage.

“I think you’ve got a jawline like my father,” Talanah continued, nodding, “or you will, as you get older.”

Kal self-consciously reached to stroke his chin, seemingly attempting to square his jaw further as Talanah laughed.

“And I think you’ve got eyes like my mother,” the Carja finally said. “They were so clear and beautiful, and I was always jealous.”

The boy squirmed slightly at the compliment, but quickly glanced back at Ikrie.

“Mine are like Mommy’s, so she has them, too.”

The dark-haired woman smiled in response, kneeling down on the other side of her son and wrapping her arm across his back, below Talanah’s.

“She does, definitely,” the Carja nodded.

A moment later, Kal reached to wrap his arms around both Ikrie’s and Talanah’s necks, holding them close together as the trio fell into silence for several long moments, staring down at the painting. Finally, the dark-haired boy spoke up, once again, breaking the trance.

“Could we make a pi-ture like this with us?”

Ikrie was caught off-guard by the sudden sound somewhere between a laugh and a sob that escaped her, although she tried to quickly cover it up by clearing her throat. It was too late, however, as Kal suddenly turned to her, wrapping both arms around her.

“Mommy, what’s wrong?”

“N-nothing, Kal, just…” she stammered, returning his embrace, “I love the idea.”

Kal squeezed her tightly for a moment before stepping back, meeting her gaze and nodding firmly, a determined look on his face.

“We’ll keep both of them, ‘cause Nana’s mommy and dad and brother can’t be in it.”

Ikrie nodded, smiling as she still felt hot tears rolling down her cheeks.

“That’s a great idea,” Talanah said softly, drawing Kal’s attention to her, once again. “It’s always been a tradition for the new generation of Khane Padish, because this…”

She gestured to the painting beside them before turning back to Kal.

“This is how we remember, and you can see—how we know we always have somewhere to belong.”

The dark-haired boy beamed as he glanced down at the painting, once again, leaving Ikrie to look over his head, her gaze meeting the quickly reddening eyes of Talanah across from her. Both of them exchanged small smiles, unable and unwilling to break the silence that had settled over them, although Ikrie did wordlessly form a single phrase on her lips to her.

“ _ Thank you. _ ”


	23. Guardian Ara

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

The sun had barely even risen above the horizon, casting long shadows behind every rock and plant in the open, sand-filled expanses of the Sundom, while also bathing everything in a reddish light that only seemed to heighten the color of the larger rock formations. Ara stood at the edge of one of them, staring out at the lower ground below, tracing the various paths that wound their way across the terrain before her eyes rose to the horizon, once again.

A moment later, her reverie was broken by the sound of scuffling and small, muttered voices behind her and she grinned, turning away from the scenery to find her two small charges just making their way over the top of the trail and onto the open ground behind her. The first of the two let out a heavy sigh as he stood on the even ground, trudging toward the older redhead before coming to a stop beside her.

“Finally made it,” Ara quipped, grinning.

“It’s early,” Kal replied, running the back of one hand over his brow.

“Best time to go on an adventure.”

The dark-haired boy let out a short, dry laugh just before his companion came to a stop beside him, looking equally as tired.

“Since when do you wake up before dawn, Aunt Ara?” Lani asked, glancing toward the older redhead, her auburn braid swinging behind her.

Ara scoffed, bracing her hands on her hips as she stared down at the two children beside her.

“When I need to.”

“And… you needed to today?” Kal replied, raising one eyebrow.

“ _ We _ needed to,” she shot back. “Do you want to see anything interesting, or do you want me to just take you back home with nothing?”

“We’ve seen this,” Lani replied, gesturing to the scenery before them.

Ara let out a huff, shrugging before beginning to turn on her heel.

“Fine, back to Meridian it is. No hunting, no ancient ruins, no fun…”

“Wait, ancient ruins?!”

Ara smirked as both children suddenly rushed before her, forcing her to stop as they blocked her path.

“You’re going to take us to some?” Lani asked excitedly.

“Well, I was thinking about it, but since it’s clearly such a travesty that I brought you out here…”

“We can do it,” Kal interrupted.

“Oh?”

Ara glanced between them with raised eyebrows for a moment as both children nodded, their expressions somewhere between pleading and eager. Finally, the older redhead sighed, throwing her arms into the air beside her.

“Fine, but the same rules still apply.”

“Don’t tell Moms, we know.”

“Either of them.”

The siblings nodded insistently before Ara’s face cracked into a grin, once again.

“Well, all right… let’s continue.”

With that, the older redhead led them across the top of the red rock mesa, keeping the sunrise to their right. Eventually, as they crested the top of another level of the formation, the groups’ eyes fell on the shapes outlined against the brilliant, pink sky in the distance. The children both seemed to gasp at once, prompting Ara to smirk.

“Told you I had something to show you,” she said. “Come on, let’s get closer.”

As they began to make their way toward the set of rusted structures, Kal began to pester her with questions.

“What was that place?”

“Not sure,” the older redhead shrugged.

“It’s got the big round thing outside,” he observed. “Was it like the Spire?”

“Well, look at that,” Ara replied, nodding. “Very well might have been.”

“How long do you think it’s been left here?”

“A very long time.”

“But… in years… how many?”

“Kid, I couldn’t even begin to count them,” Ara laughed. “They’re called  _ ancient _ ruins for a reason… and not in the sense like when you call me or your moms ancient.”

“We don’t!” Lani shot back indignantly.

Ara just hummed a response, the smirk remaining on her lips as they closed the open ground to the structures, the older redhead’s gaze constantly sweeping for signs of motion among the buildings. It had been a long time since they had to worry about wild machines attacking at random, but part of her never truly stopped looking for them, just in case.

When they reached the first of the rust-covered buildings, Kal approached the outer wall, leaning his head back to look up toward the top before attempting to jump to see through the nearest window.

“Think there’s anything left inside?” he asked, glancing back at Ara.

“Hmm… I don’t know,” she replied. “Could find out.”

Kal’s eyes widened in excitement as Ara smirked.

“Why don’t you find a way in for us?”

The dark-haired boy quickly began to run along the side of the structure as Lani ran along the adjacent side, leaving Ara at the corner as she sighed, bracing her hands on her hips and kicking at the dirt before her.

“Feels nice to have helpers… or… minions,” she laughed to herself.

A moment later, Kal began to yell, waving his arms and pointing to something along the side of the building. Ara nodded, turning toward the smaller redhead and tapping the Focus beside her ear.

“Lani, come on back. Kal won.”

“Dammit!”

“Hey!” Ara barked. “What have I told you?”

“Not to use that kind of language so often because Moms will notice…”

The older redhead smirked, watching the auburn-haired girl return to her at a light jog, slowing to a walk beside Ara as they made their way toward Kal together.

“You remember well,” the older redhead said, running a hand over the top of Lani’s head.

A moment later, they reached her brother, the dark-haired boy fidgeting impatiently beside what appeared to be a decently-sized hole in the side of the structure, although Ara noted that it was a good foot or so shorter than her.

“This is your way in?” she asked, raising her eyebrows.

“It leads right into an open area inside,” he said, pointing. “Nothing blocking it or anything!”

Ara sighed, gesturing to the opening.

“Well, lead the way young delver.”

With that, Kal quickly turned to slip into the opening, only ducking his head an inch or two, even though the actual top of it was still a good ways above his head. Lani followed after him, with Ara bringing up the rear, the older redhead sighing as she was forced to drop into a full crouch, squeezing through the opening after the kids before straightening up on the other side. As she did, she glanced around, finding that the boy had been right, and they were left standing at the edge of a rather large, open space.

The floor was made up of cracked rock with twisted pieces of rusted metal sticking up in the most broken sections, prompting the older redhead to frown.

“Watch your step in here,” she said.

The kids both muttered acknowledgements, but continued to move farther into the space without changing their actual paces or actions much, if at all. Ara sighed, following them farther in, mainly keeping her gaze on them while listening for signs of the building falling around them.

“Do you think it was always like this in here?” Lani asked. “So open?”

“Maybe,” Ara shrugged.

“I don’t think so,” Kal added, pointing to something above them. “See? Looks like there used to be other floors.”

The older redhead glanced up, as well, noting what the boy had pointed out appeared to be hints of more rock, held in place by a web of metal inside it, along the wall ahead of them, clearly placed with each one several yards above the one below it.

“Good eye,” Ara nodded. “Looks like it all collapsed.”

“But the metal part’s still here,” Lani said, confusion lacing her tone. “So… that means it wasn’t attacked, right?”

The older redhead’s lips pulled into a thin line for a moment before she cleared her throat.

“Uh, no, it… it doesn’t really look like that.”

After wandering about the open room for another minute or so, the children seemed to have explored as much as they wanted from the building, and Ara guided them back outside. Once they were standing on the open ground, once again, Kal quickly pointed to one of the other buildings ahead of them.

“Can we go in that one?” he asked. “The one with the big round thing on top?”

Ara eyed the massive, decrepit, metal structure warily, noting how part of the dish-like construction had already begun to fall away, a piece of its metal skeleton seeming to dangle toward the roof precariously.

“I don’t know…”

The children instantly began to whine, beg, and plead to go inside until the older redhead finally relented, sighing heavily.

“Stay very close to me, okay?”

They both nodded, but their expressions told her they were satisfied with their victory. As they drew ever closer to the structure, Ara’s eyes remained on the structure on top of it, noting that the piece she had seen hanging, moments ago, was actually swaying slightly, in the breeze. Her jaw worked tensely, but she ultimately remained quiet, remaining close to Lani and Kal as they made their way toward a large opening in one side of the structure.

When they reached it, Ara quickly brought them to a stop, motioning for the children to remain still while she took the first few steps into the ruin. Glancing around, she noted that this one seemed to have more of its internal floors intact, and she frowned slightly, already knowing what they would ask.

“Is it safe, Aunt Ara?” Lani called from behind her.

“If you follow directly behind me,” she replied, glancing back and waving for them to approach.

The children followed in single file, Kal taking the lead, until they came to a stop behind her, glancing around with wide eyes.

“There’s more in this one,” the dark-haired boy said incredulously.

“Yeah, so be very careful, and listen closely at all times,” the older redhead said, raising her eyebrows at the two of them. “Understood?”

They both replied in the affirmative, but their tones clearly conveyed how distracted they were by the sights around them. With a sigh, Ara turned and began to lead the way farther into the space inside the structure, her gaze constantly sweeping for signs of things falling apart. Their footsteps echoed about the metal and stone, at times almost sounding as if something was falling in the distance, prompting the hair on the back of the older redhead’s neck to stand on end, but she continued onward, maneuvering around hunks of rusted metal that almost seemed like they had once been consoles of some kind, as well as an ancient machine similar in shape to the wheeled ones she had seen brought over from the Port.

“Aunt Ara,” Kal suddenly said, prompting her to jump slightly at the sound of his voice, but she quickly recovered, glancing back at him. “Do you think we could try to go up?”

He pointed to something over her shoulder and she turned around, again, to see what appeared to be the remnants of an ancient set of stairs. Instantly, cold sweat formed on her palms as she swallowed heavily.

“I… don’t know if that’s wise, Kal…”

Both children immediately let out sounds somewhere between groaning and whining, prompting the older redhead to shake her head, rubbing at her eyes tiredly.

“What did I tell you two when we came in here?”

They both stopped suddenly, shuffling their feet on the ground before them.

“Places like this aren’t safe to go climbing around on,” she continued. “When metal rusts like this, it becomes very weak. Sometimes, you can easily put your hand or your foot through it. Climbing on it? No way.”

Lani and Kal both nodded as they muttered apologies, refusing to meet her eyes. With a heavy sigh, Ara shook her head, stepping toward them and gently turning them back to the opening where they had entered.

“Come on, let’s head back outside.”

As they stepped onto the open ground, once again, the light of the sunrise that greeted them was already turning from pink to gold, prompting Ara to frown.

“We should start heading back. Don’t want to get home too late, or your Moms will be worried.”

“They know we’re with you, right?” Lani shrugged. “They’re probably not worried.”

The older redhead smirked at her.

“I appreciate the confidence, Lani, but,” she replied, “I say we need to start heading back.”

The children both nodded, their expressions conveying their disappointment. With a sigh, Ara placed her hands on her hips.

“Fine, would perhaps a sweet roll on the edge of the Mesa at sunrise help?”

Lani and Kal quickly glanced over at her, prompting Ara to swing her back from over shoulders, opening the top and pulling something wrapped in heavy wax paper from within. She waved it toward the children before swinging the bag back into place behind her.

“This way.”

With that, she led the way around the edge of the ruined structures, crossing the open ground covered in dry, brown grass before slowing to a stop a few yards from the sudden drop off that signaled the edge of the mesa. Ara took a seat on the sandy ground with a quiet groan, the children taking spots next to her just before she unwrapped the wax paper package. True to her word, a glistening sweet roll lay inside, the sweet, sticky filling visibly running from one side. The older redhead quickly tore it into three pieces, handing two of them out to the children, who tore into them quickly, while Ara took her first bite much more slowly.

“So, did we learn anything this morning?” she asked.

“Rusted metal is dangerous,” Kal managed around a mouthful of food.

“That’s a good one,” Ara nodded, glancing toward Lani. “What about you?”

“You wake up before noon sometimes.”

The older redhead narrowed her eyes at the auburn-haired girl as Lani laughed, quickly taking a bite of her piece of sweet roll, as well.

“Sounds like maybe I should just consider taking Kal on our next adventure…”

“No, wait!” the young redhead said quickly. “Um… always listen to Aunt Ara?”

She stared back at the girl for a moment or two longer before her face cracked into a smirk.

“Nice one, kid.”

Lani looked pleased with herself as she took the last bite of her roll, wiping her hands on her leggings. Kal finished his own a moment later, but took a scoop of sand in his cupped hands, rubbing them together for a moment or two before letting it fall to the ground once again. As it did, he clapped his hands together several times, glancing at his fingers before frowning and resorting to wiping them on his leggings, as well. Ara watched him for a moment before sighing and beginning to rise to her feet, using the outside of the wax paper to clean her own hands.

“Okay,  _ now _ it’s time to head back.”

As the group rose from their picnic spot, Ara noted how the children glanced out toward the sunrise for another moment or two.

“You know which direction the sun rises from, right?” she asked.

“East,” Kal replied, “past where Aunt Ashana lives.”

The older redhead smiled softly for a moment before clearing her throat.

“Yeah, just past her.”

With that, Ara gently herded the children away from the sunrise, heading back toward the distant mesa, where the first hints of the sunlight gleaming off the glass of Meridian and the metal of the Spire were visible. Instead of entirely retracing their steps, the older redhead led them toward the opposite side of the mesa they had scaled, toward another trail that led toward the ground, below.

As they reached the top of it, she frowned slightly.

It was somewhat steeper than she remembered.

“Okay, move slowly,” she said. “Stick close to the wall, that way you can keep a grip, just in case.”

The children nodded as Ara began to lead the way down the trail, her steps careful and measured as she entered the first decline, keeping her left hand against the rocky surface to her side. As she reached the first sharp turn in the trail, she found that the going was not impossible, but definitely slower than she had hoped, however she also knew that this would bring them closer to the trail back to Meridian, and wouldn’t require them to try to climb back up and cross the entire top of the mesa, once again.

With a deep breath, she glanced back to find Kal and Lani approaching, also moving slowly and cautiously.

“Okay, sharp corner,” the older redhead said. “Take my hand and cross over, but then stay close to the wall that’s gonna be on your right now, okay?”

They both nodded and Ara held her right hand out toward the dark-haired boy as he approached, first. Kal took it, allowing Ara’s grip to carefully guide him and keep his balance until he was able to lean against the rocky wall on the next section of the descent. As he began to continue on, Ara released his other hand, turning back to Lani.

“Okay, let’s—”

A moment later, the sound of loose gravel shuffling came from beside her, quickly followed by a surprised yelp from Kal. The older redhead whirled back to the dark-haired boy to find that he had lost his footing and began to stagger forward, his left arm flailing wildly to his side.

“Kal!” Ara screamed, her heart coming to a stop as the young boy suddenly tumbled forward.

He seemed to slam into the rock wall beside him for a moment before falling to the ground, sliding several feet toward the next sharp turn in the trail. The world seemed to go into slow motion as the older redhead watched him turn to one side, his legs just beginning to swing over the edge of the steep drop-off, but just before she thought he was about to fully slip over it, he came to a stop, his hands firmly dug into the gravel before him.

“Kal, don’t move!” she called, her chest heaving as her heart seemed to burst back into motion, quickly leaping to a frenzied pace. “Lani, sit down against this wall, and stay here.”

The auburn-haired girl stared back at her with wide eyes, but nodded, sinking to a seated position on the ground and huddling against the wall beside her before Ara took a deep breath and carefully began to descend after her brother. The older redhead tested the ground where she saw the scuff marks from Kal’s tumble begin, but found that it seemed as steady as the rest, so she pressed onward.

The dark-haired boy had managed to pull himself forward, somewhat, bringing his feet from over the edge of the drop-off, although he remained lying on his stomach. As Ara closed the gap between them, a steady stream of muttered curses flowed past her lips, although she quickly tried to stop them as she reached Kal.

“Hey, my little man,” she said softly, crouching down before him while keeping one hand on the wall beside her, “you okay?”

“My arm… hurts…” he muttered.

“How bad?”

“Burns… I think I cut it…”

Ara swallowed painfully but nodded, extending her free hand toward him.

“Take my hand, Kal.”

He carefully reached for it with one of his own, but his fingers were just short of the redhead’s. Ara carefully slid a step or two closer, noting the small cascade of rocks and gravel that slid away from her, but she ultimately held her footing until she was able to grasp the boy’s hand in her own.

“There we go, come this way,” she breathed, tugging on his arm. “I’ve got you.”

Kal slowly slid forward and away from the edge of the trail, until he was finally able to rise to his knees. As he did, he quickly slid forward, wrapping his arms around Ara.

“It’s okay… you’re okay…” she breathed, wrapping her left arm around him tightly and squeezing the dark-haired boy to her side. “Let’s go back. Come on.”

“I-I can’t…” he muttered.

“I’ve got you, Kal, it’s okay.”

“What if…?”

“You’ll be okay,” Ara breathed. “I’m sorry. I won’t let you slip again. I promise, Kal.”

The boy remained still for a moment or two longer before nodding, his face still buried in the shoulder of her tunic. Finally, Ara took a deep breath, turning to head back up the trail and guiding Kal in front of her until he stood with his left hand against the wall. The older redhead kept one hand on the wall, herself, while the other remained on the boy’s right shoulder, constantly keeping a reassuring pressure on it as they made their way back up the incline toward the first turn above them.

When they reached it, they found Lani still huddled against the wall, but her expression quickly faded to relief when she saw her brother guided ahead of Ara.

“Kal, you didn’t fall and die!” she exclaimed.

“Lani, let’s… let’s just get back to the top,” the older redhead interjected, a shiver running down her spine.

The auburn-haired girl nodded, carefully rising to her feet before beginning to move along the wall to her right, Kal clinging to it, as well, with Ara bringing up the rear. When they finally reached the top, the Lani took several quick steps away from the head of the trail before whirling around. The dark-haired boy followed suit, staggering forward until Lani caught him by his shoulders.

“Kal, your arm!” she said, reaching for his right arm.

“Hurts a little…” he mumbled.

Ara swore under her breath, quickly crossing to the children and kneeling before them.

“Kal, let me see.”

The boy turned to her, holding out his right arm to reveal a rather notable gash running along the outside edge of his arm, stretching from his wrist to just before his elbow. The older redhead’s heart sank into her stomach as she saw the blood already running from it and a slight burning sensation appeared in her left arm, prompting her hand to tighten slightly around the boy’s shoulder.

“Okay, we’re going to get you cleaned up, and back home, okay?”

Ara quickly slung her bag from over her shoulders, opening it and scrambling inside for anything she could use to try to clean or bandage the wound, but found nothing. Cursing softly, she glanced toward Kal, her jaw working tensely.

“Okay, we’ll use this,” she muttered, quickly pulling her outer tunic over her head and using the section at the bottom to begin wiping at the wound, attempting to both clear the blood and wipe away any dust and dirt that remained around it, as well.

Once it was as clean as she was going to get it, she wrapped the fabric around his arm, tying it securely on both ends before letting out a heavy sigh.

“How’s that feel?” she asked, glancing up to meet his eyes.

“Feels… weird,” he said. “Still stings.”

“It’s going to for a bit, I’m sorry,” she said, placing one hand along the side of his face. “You think you can walk back with me, my big man?”

Kal’s jaw squared as he nodded, but she could tell how he was just barely holding back tears as his eyes grew redder and redder. With a deep breath, Ara rose to her feet, swinging her bag over her shoulders, once again, and carefully guiding the children back the way they had come.

“Okay, let’s go home… let’s go home…”

A broad grin tugged at Anukai’s lips as Ikrie climbed over her, straddling her hips and sliding her hands beneath her light sleep shirt and onto her stomach. A slight shiver ran down the redhead’s spine as the dark-haired woman’s fingers trailed over the old scar across her stomach, but it quickly passed as Ikrie quickly relieved her of the garment, tossing it aside.

“First quiet morning in… how long?” she purred, leaning forward and pressing a series of kisses against the redhead’s jaw.

“Too long…” Anukai muttered, her eyes sliding closed as she relished in the feeling of her mate’s touch.

They slid open, once again, as Ikrie’s hands pulled away, however only momentarily, to remove her own shirt, throwing it atop the redhead’s. Anukai’s hands quickly slid onto her sides, just above her hips, kneading at the freckle-dusted skin, the dark-haired woman’s collection having grown considerably over the years under the desert sunlight. Despite the longer hair, and the overall slight softening to her frame, the woman under the redhead’s touch still exhibited the same energy she had sixteen years ago, when this sort of morning had become a new normal.

Neither of them spoke as Ikrie leaned forward, once again, her lips finding the pulse point in Anukai’s throat before trailing downward, toward her collarbone, the redhead pulling the warm body above her as close as possible.

Just as her mate’s lips came to rest against the field of freckles along her right shoulder, the redhead’s eyes shot open, her pupils wide as her chest began to heave.

“Is that the spot?” Ikrie teased, her tone low and breathy.

“Ikrie, stop.”

The dark-haired woman pulled back, concern creasing her face.

“Did I hurt you?”

“N-no, just… I… I need a second,” Anukai panted, quickly scrambling to sit up as her mate climbed off her, allowing the redhead to turn sideways in the bed, propping her elbows on her knees and burying her face in her hands.

“What’s wrong?” Ikrie asked, sliding beside her and wrapping one arm supportively behind her back.

“I… I just… all of the sudden I felt… terrified,” she muttered, shaking her head slowly.

“Terrified? I didn’t realize I was so—”

“It’s the children, Ikrie. Something’s wrong.”

The dark-haired woman fell silent mid-sentence, her eyes widening as her arm squeezed the redhead even tighter.

“W-what do you mean?”

“I… it’s… I don’t know,” she managed. “Lani’s scared, I… I just know it, and… I think it’s Kal.”

Ikrie grew immediately stiff before she slipped from the bed, kneeling before her mate and gripping her hands in both of hers.

“Anukai, what do you mean?” she said, her voice rising in pitch and volume. “What’s wrong with Kal?”

“I-I don’t know!” the redhead shot back, her chest heaving as her pupils remained wide, a flood of adrenaline pouring through her veins.

“They went with Ara,” Ikrie said firmly, shaking her mate’s hands between them. “Where did they go?”

“All I know was… a hike, I think.”

“A hike where?!”

“I don’t know!”

They both fell silent as the redhead’s voice, a near shriek, echoed about the room for a moment or two, until her head fell forward, what seemed to be sobs shaking her shoulders. Ikrie swallowed heavily, relaxing her near death-grip on Anukai’s hands before rising to sit on the bed beside her, once again, wrapping her arms around the redhead’s shaking frame.

“How do you know?” the dark-haired woman whispered.

A long silence fell over them before Anukai inhaled a slow, deep breath.

“It’s… it’s Lani,” she said softly. “She and I… our connection… you know, like…”

“I know, like you and Aloy--and Ara--but not quite?”

“Right,” Anukai nodded. “I don’t know what she’s thinking, and I can’t…  _ see _ her… right now, but… I can…  _ feel _ her…”

Ikrie nodded slowly, but remained silent until Anukai finally turned toward her, wrapping the dark-haired woman in a tight embrace and burying her face in the crook of her neck.

“It was so visceral, though,” the redhead breathed. “She was so scared, but… I don’t think she’s hurt, and… and there was an impression of… of blood.”

“How certain are you?” Ikrie replied.

A long moment of silence passed before Anukai inhaled deeply.

“I’ve so rarely felt anything like that… from her…”

Ikrie’s grip around the redhead tightened as she squeezed her eyes shut, trying to hold back the hot tears that burned in her eyes.

Whether they were from anger, or fear, she couldn’t tell, but the tense feeling that constricted her chest, feeling almost as if it would crack her ribs, told her it didn’t matter.

Both women remained on the edge of their bed for some time before they managed to get to their feet, dressing normally in the anticipation of the children’s return, but neither of them said anything. Every time they caught each other’s gazes, they found their faces pale and their eyes wide. They had already paced the apartment numerous times by the time the sun had reached the harsh white of mid-morning, and yet there had still been no word from Ara, nor any signs of them at the door.

Calls from Anukai to her sister went unanswered, and each time the vice grip around her chest tightened a little more.

Finally, after attempting what her Focus told her was the twentieth call that morning, she let out a growl of frustration, slipping the device from beside her ear and dropping it onto the low table before the couch, the redhead leaning back in her seat and rubbing at both eyes with her hands. Just as she did, the muted sound of voices seemed to drift through the front door and her head snapped up, her eyes locking on the wooden portal.

She waited for a moment to see if it was simply someone passing by, but they seemed to be growing louder, and two of them were distinctly much younger than the third. Anukai began to scramble from her seat on the couch just as the sound of the handle turning echoed about the living room. As the portal began to swing open to a squeak from the hinges, the first signs of a head of auburn hair appeared through it and the older redhead quickly rushed forward.

Lani jumped at the sudden motion, but quickly accepted her mother’s embrace as the older redhead dropped to a kneeling position before her. The girl didn’t say anything as Anukai pulled back, running one hand over her hair before turning to the other two. Immediately, her heart dropped into her stomach as she saw Ara standing behind Kal, one hand gently resting against the back of his head as the dark-haired boy stood somewhat unsteadily before her, his right arm wrapped in some kind of cloth from his elbow to his wrist.

“A-anukai, I’m… I’m so sorry,” Ara stammered. “He slipped and… he caught part of the rock beside him…”

The sound of pounding footsteps echoed from the hallway to the bedrooms for a moment before Ikrie suddenly skidded to a halt in the living space, her eyes wide.

“Kallik?!”

The boy turned toward her, his motions seemingly somewhat delayed and out of it, revealing his pale, sweat-covered face to his mother.

“Ikrie…”

“Get away from him!”

The other three in the room physically recoiled at the volume and intensity of Ikrie’s voice as she stormed forward, shoving Ara back into the doorframe behind her before kneeling before her son, her eyes wide as she cupped the side of his face in one hand.

“What happened?” she said quickly. “Where are you hurt? How badly?”

“My arm…”

Whatever color remained in Ikrie’s face drained instantly as her gaze instinctually fell to his left arm, but found it unmarked. Her gaze switched to the other and she quickly tore at the cloth wrapped around it.

“I tried to bandage it…” Ara said, her tone much smaller than Anukai had ever heard it before.

“Don’t say another fucking word!” the dark-haired woman roared, glaring up at the redhead with such intensity that she physically recoiled farther into the doorframe.

Anukai suddenly felt Lani move closer to her, wrapping her arms around the older redhead’s neck. As she did, Anukai could feel the soft tremors in them, and she swallowed heavily. Ikrie turned back to Kal, her expression instantly softening as she examined his right arm, her fingers tracing along the outer edge of the cut, the entire surface now smeared with dark, red liquid.

“Stings…” he muttered, shifting uncomfortably at her touch.

“I know, I know Kallik…” she cooed, running one hand through his hair. “I’ll get you cleaned up, get you some rest.”

“Aunt Ara…”

“She’ll be fine,” Ikrie interjected, her tone terse as her gaze flicked to the older redhead for a moment before returning to her son. “Come on, let’s go.”

With that, she rose to her feet, taking his uninjured arm and leading him toward the hallway. As soon as they disappeared from sight, Lani turned back to her mother, sniffling slightly.

“Is Kal going to die?”

“No… no, no,” Anukai replied, shaking her head as she ran one of her hands over the top of the auburn girl’s hair, smoothing some of the small pieces that had escaped the top of her braid. “He’ll be fine. He just needs to get cleaned up, drink some water, and sleep.”

The young girl bit her lip, not appearing convinced for a moment, before she nodded.

“Aunt Ara said so, too, but the way Mom just acted…”

“She’s concerned, that’s all,” Anukai said, offering a small smile. Why don’t you drop your stuff off in your room and come back out here to help, okay?”

The girl nodded, glancing toward Ara for a moment before running over and throwing her arms about the redhead’s waist. She placed her hand on the auburn-haired girl’s head, gently smoothing over her hair, as well, for a moment before Lani released her and hurried toward her room. Anukai rose to her feet with a sigh, rubbing at her eyes.

“Ara, I…”

“I’m so…  _ so _ sorry,” the shorter-haired redhead interjected, her eyes visibly reddening. “He… I helped him down one part of the trail, I turned back to Lani, and… and…”

“I understand,” Anukai said shortly, her tone firm as her gaze bore into her sister’s for a moment, “but I think… I think it may be best if you aren’t here when Ikrie gets back.”

Ara’s face paled and she swallowed heavily, nodding.

“I’ll… I’ll see you around… then…” she muttered, turning to slip back through the doorway.

“Ara, I—”

Before Anukai could finish her thought, the door had closed firmly behind her, and the redhead let out a heavy sigh, shaking her head, once again. A moment later, Lani appeared in the living space, once again, having shed her pack and boots.

“Where did Aunt Ara go?” she asked.

“She needs to rest some, herself,” Anukai said, attempting to adopt a smile, even though she felt it was incredibly unconvincing. “She’ll be okay, don’t worry.”

With that, the older redhead rose to her feet, turning back to the kitchenette behind her and moving to grab some supplies from one of the cabinets at the far end.

“Here, let’s take these to Mom,” she said, handing Lani a roll of white bandages and a bottle of clear liquid.

The girl nodded, taking them before quickly rushing away. With a heavy sigh, Anukai closed her eyes for a moment, leaning against the counter before her. The feeling of earlier, the utter grip of terror that had shot through her out of nowhere, still lingered in the back of her mind, and after seeing Kal when he stepped through the door, she had a feeling she understood it even more, now.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed away from the counter, crossing the living space and making her way down the short hallway to Kal’s bedroom on the right. The doorway was open, and she could hear the sounds of commotion and voices from within, but the redhead paused in the doorway, leaning her shoulder against the frame for a moment. Ikrie was kneeling beside the boy’s bed, helping Lani wrap the white bandage around his arm.

Even from this distance, Anukai could discern the shake in Ikrie’s hand as she guided their daughter’s.

The redhead’s lips pulled into a thin line as she pushed away from the door, slowly entering the room. Ikrie glanced back at the sound of her footsteps, seeming to jump for a moment before her gaze flashed with recognition and she took a deep breath.

“Here, you’ve got this,” she said to Lani, releasing her to finish wrapping her brother’s arm as she rose to her feet and approached Anukai. “Is she still here?”

The redhead shook her head and the dark-haired woman let out a heavy sigh, her hands notably clenching into fists at her sides.

“I told her it was best to give some space, for now,” Anukai said softly.

“How about forever?”

“Ikrie,” the redhead hissed, her tone quiet but hard as she met her mate’s pale eyes. “She did not harm him on purpose.”

“But through negligence,” the dark-haired woman spat. “It’s just as bad for someone who’s supposed to be as much of a survivor as her.”

“None of us have quite been the same warriors and survivors we were almost twenty years ago,” Anukai sighed, placing her hands on Ikrie’s shoulders, even as the dark-haired woman tried to shrug them away. “We all make mistakes.”

“Hers almost killed my son!”

All sound seemed to have been sucked from the room in the moments following her outburst, Anukai’s eyes flicking past her mate’s shoulder to see Lani had paused her motions, glancing back at the two of them, while Kal’s head had rolled to one side, his eyes gaze also fixed on them.

“Ikrie,” she said softly, nodding toward the doorway.

The dark-haired woman’s jaw worked tensely for a moment but she ultimately followed her mate into the hallway, Anukai bringing them to nearly the living space before coming to a stop, turning to face her.

“Not in front of them,” she whispered.

“Fine,” Ikrie huffed, equally as softly.

“And Ikrie… Kal is  _ our _ son.”

“I know, I know…” the dark-haired woman said, rubbing at her eyes tiredly. “You know what I meant, though.”

“I know what I hope you meant…”

Ikrie paused for a moment, slowly lowering her hands from her face as she lifted her gaze to meet the redhead’s, once again.

“Anukai… I love both of them,” she said, barely louder than a breath. “If it was Lani on that bed, right now, you know I’d be the same way.”

The redhead heaved a heavy sigh, nodding as she hung her own head a moment later.

“I also know exactly how you’d be if it were her, too…”

At that exact moment, the flash of terror from earlier reared its head in the redhead’s mind, her eyes squeezing shut tightly against it as she tried to control her heart rate. With it, however, came something else… something more painful.

Realization.

“Ikrie, can we… can we please stop this?” she muttered.

“Okay, I just—”

“Ikrie, she’s scared, right now… of  _ us _ .”

As Anukai lifted her gaze, she found Ikrie’s eyes wide before her, the dark-haired woman’s expression finally dropping the last hints of anger it had carried from moments ago.

“Please, I… this isn’t about us,” she continued. “I’m worried for Kal, too. You and Lani bandaged him up well, though. We’ll just keep an eye on him, just in case, you know? I’ll… I’ll talk to Ara… I owe her that… owe both of you that. In the meantime, though… let’s just… go back in there.”

The dark-haired woman nodded, her jaw clenching as she swallowed heavily. The two of them made their way back to the bedroom, stepping inside to find Lani seated on the edge of the bed beside Kal, holding the end of the bandages that she had cut with a small knife still held in her other hand.

“I didn’t know how to tie it up,” she said.

“Here, I’ll show you,” Ikrie said quickly, stepping forward to show the auburn-haired girl how to secure the end of the bandage in place.

As they did, Anukai moved around her mate’s other side, leaning over the head of the bed and running one hand across Kal’s forehead, brushing some of the shaggy, dark locks aside.

“How’re you feeling?” she asked softly, smiling down at him.

“Tired,” he mumbled.

“Sure took a lot out of you, huh?”

He nodded, his eyes already half-closed.

“Tell you what, why don’t we get you a glass of water or two, and then you can take a nap, okay?”

“But—”

“It’ll make you feel much better when you wake up.”

Kal sighed but nodded as Anukai ran her fingers through his hair, once again, leaning down to place a gentle kiss on his forehead.

“When you wake up, we’ll watch your favorite one of those moving pictures Grandma gave you, okay?”

The dark-haired boy’s eyes sparked for a moment as he nodded, but still blinked slowly. With another small smile, Anukai leaned away from the bed, moving to get the water she had promised.

“We’ll be right back,” Ikrie’s voice sounded from behind her, prompting the redhead to glance back, finding her mate following her with the bandages and the cleaning alcohol.

“Water isn’t a two person job,” the redhead smirked.

“No, but… just walk,” Ikrie sighed, rolling her eyes.

The two of them made their way back to the kitchenette, where Ikrie returned the supplies while Anukai poured a glass of water from a pitcher in their chillbox.

“I’m sorry,” the dark-haired woman sighed, prompting the redhead to glance back at her, finding her leaning against the counter with her arms folded over her chest, “for earlier.”

Anukai sighed, finishing the glass and placing it on the counter before returning the pitcher to its storage place. When she faced her mate, once again, she moved beside her, sliding one arm behind her back.

“You’re right,” she said softly.

“How so?”

“If it were Lani… I’m sure we’d be in the opposite positions.”

A few, long moments of silence passed over them before the dark-haired woman sighed.

“Does… does this make us… bad parents?”

Anukai swallowed heavily but shook her head.

“No… no, I… I don’t think so.”

Another moment or two of silence passed before Ikrie slowly turned to Anukai’s side, wrapping her arms around the redhead as she buried her face in her mate’s shoulder.

“I was so scared,” she managed, her voice wavering on the verge of sobs, “when I saw him… After what you said earlier… I-I just… I couldn’t…”

Anukai wrapped her other arm around Ikrie, pulling her tightly to her and laying her cheek gently against the crown of the other woman’s head.

“I know… me, too,” she said. “Me, too…”

Ara shouldered the door of the pub open perhaps a little too harshly, nearly knocking over a young Carja couple as they made to exit, at the same time. She simply glared at them, and they quickly slipped past her into the street outside without another word. With a sharp, deep breath in through her nose, she made her way to the actual bar counter, finding a seat at the far end that was at least a few stools away from the nearest other person.

After a long thirty seconds or so, the barkeep stopped before her, leaning against the far side of the wooden surface.

“Got two soups today,” he said.

“Don’t care,” Ara mumbled. “Claim Whiskey.”

The dark-haired man blinked in surprise.

“It’s… not even noon.”

“I fucking ordered it, didn’t I?” Ara snapped, pulling out a handful of shards and slamming them on the wooden surface before her. “I’ve got the shards, if that’s what you’re scared of.”

The man bit his lower lip for a moment before sighing and shrugging, turning to grab a short glass and pouring two fingers’ worth before sliding it to her. The redhead grabbed it and downed the amber liquid in one go, holding some of it in her mouth just long enough that it began to burn before swallowing. As she did, she placed the glass on the bar and motioned for another. The barkeep raised his eyebrows as Ara sighed.

“There’s enough for two, there, right?” she muttered, gesturing to the pile of shards.

The man nodded reluctantly before pouring her another glass. This time, however, she didn’t immediately down the liquor, instead holding the vessel before her and twirling it slowly.

“I’ll be back in a little bit,” the barkeep said, replacing the bottle on the counter behind him before tending to another set of patrons.

The redhead continued to swirl her glass, staring at the liquid sloshing inside it as she did, the center forming a small whirlpool under her motions.

She couldn’t tell if the burning in her chest was anger, fear, or the whiskey.

The whiskey was to try to kill the two former, but it only seemed to fan them, so far.

The image of Kal falling and sliding down the steep, rocky path on the edge of the mesa kept replaying over and over before her, no matter how many times she tried to focus on the phrase “he’s okay”.

The places on her shoulders where Ikrie’s hands had shoved her burned almost as much as the inside of her chest.

“So that’s it, huh?” she muttered to herself. “That’s how you get out? Again?”

“Not quite.”

She jumped at the sound of the voice beside her, whirling to her left and nearly spilling her drink in the process. When her gaze finally settled, she found an all-too-familiar face staring back at her own.

“You should know that in this family we don’t say goodbye easily,” the redhead beside her said.

“Guess I missed that part of the lineage,” Ara laughed dryly, beginning to lift the drink to her lips.

“No, you didn’t.”

Her eyes narrowed at the woman beside her for a moment before confusion creased her brow.

The redhead was older than her, but notably not quite as old as she found herself expecting. Her hair was kept short and neat, but was not streaked with notable lines of silver, although a few did show their presence at her temples. Ara’s eyes locked on the gold-green pair across from her as she slowly lowered her glass.

“Did I get drunk that quickly?”

“No, but I figured you needed someone to talk to,” Elisabet said, leaning against the bar before her, “or someone to knock some sense into your head. One or the other.”

Ara swallowed heavily, glancing around to note that no one seemed to be watching her.

“If you’re paranoid, I’ll just do the talking, and you can listen,” the older redhead said. “Okay?”

Ara grumbled something in agreement, sipping at her drink before sighing heavily.

“You’re not  _ kicked out _ or whatever it was you thought you were a minute ago,” Elisabet began, folding her hands on the bar before her. “Ikrie was mad because she was scared for her son. Anukai was, too, but she just… showed it differently.”

The younger redhead let out a short, dry laugh as she swirled her glass, again.

“I know, I wouldn’t expect that, either,” the older redhead said, “but that’s beside the point. Ikrie needs some space, and she wants you to keep yours from Kal for a bit. She’s Mom, so what she says goes, I’m afraid.”

Ara’s lips twisted into a slight frown as she continued to stare at the remaining amber liquid in her glass.

“But, that doesn’t mean that’s how it will stay forever,” Elisabet continued. “Kal will heal, get better, and then she’ll be more open to talking it out.”

“I thought you knew me,” Ara mumbled. “Talking it out isn’t really my strength.”

“You can be honest though, right?” the older redhead shot back. “You don’t have to be amazing at giving speeches to just say what’s in your head and your chest already.”

The younger redhead shrugged, finishing off the last of her glass with a sigh, carefully placing it back on the counter.

“If you’re afraid to use your words, alone,” Elisabet continued, regardless, “then use your actions, too.”

“Like what?”

The older redhead suddenly lifted her head, glancing toward the door at the far end of the room before smirking.

“I think someone else would be better at answering that.”

Ara’s gaze followed hers until she found yet another mirror image of herself approaching, although this time she was much closer to her own age, with a single braid tying her long mane of copper hair behind her head.

“You found me,” Ara sighed, glancing toward the seat beside her to find Elisabet was gone.

“Call it intuition,” Anukai smirked, sliding into the seat previously inhabited by the older redhead.

“I guess we are  _ sisters _ after all,” the shorter-haired redhead shot back, leaning into the phrase with particular emphasis.”

“We are,” the braided redhead nodded. “Nothing’s changed.”

“Except your wife wants me to never see your children ever again.”

“She doesn’t think that.”

“You saw her! You heard her!” Ara spluttered, gesturing wildly in a vague direction of the outside of the pub.

“And I also  _ know _ her,” Anukai replied. “She was scared, Ara, more than I’ve ever seen her, and… although I wasn’t prepared for how she showed it… I knew that.”

“Well, you’ve got twenty years of knowing her on me,” the shorter-haired redhead quipped, trying to catch the attention of the barkeep, but Anukai quickly lowered her hand, holding it to the wooden surface with her own. “What’re you doing?”

“Ara, stop,” she said firmly. “You and I both know that the place you go when you drink… especially feeling like you do now… is no good for anyone. You… me… Lani…”

Confusion creased Ara’s face as Anukai sighed, tentatively pulling her hand off of Ara’s and curling her fingers into a loose fist.

“She and I… you know the connection we have, right?”

The shorter-haired redhead nodded.

“It’s weaker than that—well, not weaker, but… different…” Anukai continued, “but I’m worried… how much she feels… how much she… sees… For years it… it’s been more subdued, but today… it was different. There was… more… What if that goes both ways? What if you end up in your--place--and I end up there with you, again…?”

Ara’s eyes widened for a moment as she took a deep breath, glancing down at the glass before her before swallowing heavily.

“Okay,” she said roughly, nodding.

“Besides, I… I want you to be sober… and not hungover… so you can maybe see Kal later.”

Ara’s eyebrows raised as she glanced over at her sister, the other redhead sighing and folding her arms on the bar before her.

“Ikrie will come around,” she said softly, “especially if… especially if you  _ show _ her… how much you care.”

The shorter-haired redhead swallowed nervously, drumming her fingers on the bar.

“Anukai… you… you know I… I love the two of them… with everything I have…”

“ _ I _ know,” the braided redhead replied, nodding, “and… and I was scared and a little mad, too, but… well, we have that advantage we already mentioned.”

Ara nodded slowly, running one hand along the buzzed side of her head before rubbing at the back of her neck.

“Show Ikrie that, too,” Anukai said slowly. “I know she’ll accept it.”

A heavy silence fell over the two of them for several long moments before the braided redhead sighed, once again.

“Forgiveness, on the other hand, is your own to figure out,” she added. “I think starting with this, though, would be good.”

Ara nodded slowly, staring blankly at the bar between the two of them before glancing up at Anukai to find her offering a small smile. She didn’t say anything else, but extended one arm toward the shorter-haired redhead, wrapping it around her shoulders for a moment before shaking her gently.

“Understood?”

“Understood.”

Ara came to a stop before the familiar apartment door, pausing with one hand raised to knock for a moment before taking a deep breath and following through with the gesture. The early-afternoon heat was tempered slightly by the overcast skies that had managed to hang around past dawn, for once, although little to no rain had actually fallen. The redhead shifted her stance, adjusting her grip on the burlap bag in her left hand, bouncing on the balls of her feet slightly as she felt her heart rate accelerating at the sound of footsteps from inside the building before her.

A moment later, the door swung open and she froze in place, eyes locking with the pale ones framed with a field of freckles below and long, dark hair above.

“H-hey…” Ara managed shakily, adjusting her grip on the bag, once again.

“Ara,” Ikrie said, leaning against the door beside her.

“I… uh… I brought… some things for Kal,” she said. “To try to help him feel better.”

The dark-haired woman raised her eyebrows as the redhead lifted the bag, shifting it slightly as she glanced down at it.

“There’s some… tea for fever… some salve that’s good for cleaning and preventing a wound from getting infected… plus also some of those candied cherries he likes so much… for fun.”

Ikrie’s gaze flicked between the bag and Ara’s face briefly before the dark-haired woman sighed heavily, pulling the door open farther and stepping aside.

“Come in.”

Ara froze for a moment before swallowing heavily and obeying, tentatively stepping over the threshold into the living space. The apartment was near silent as Ikrie closed the door behind her, prompting Ara to glance around.

“Anukai and Lani here?” she asked.

Ikrie shook her head.

“Took her out for some target practice,” the dark-haired woman replied.

Ara nodded, muttering something like “good, good” softly before taking a deep breath.

“Ikrie, I… I came to bring this stuff, but also… to say sorry,” the redhead said. “I… I know that sounds… pathetic, but…”

The dark-haired woman remained silent, her arms folded over her chest as Ara stuttered before finally sighing and holding the bag out to her, again.

“Here, can… can you please take it? If you want it…” she said, hanging her head. “I… I know you probably don’t want me anywhere near him and... I’m sure he doesn’t want to see me right now, either.”

A long few moments of silence passed before she heard Ikrie take a slow, deep breath.

“He’s been asking about you, actually.”

Ara froze, her gaze lifting to the woman across from her in confusion.

“He… has?”

Ikrie nodded, her pale eyes continuing to meet Ara’s gold-green straight on.

“I think he’s afraid that I killed you.”

A moment of silence passed before Ara finally laughed, lowering her arm as she shook her head. Glancing up, she found the hints of a grin tugging at Ikrie’s lips, as well.

“Well, you probably thought about it.”

The dark-haired woman laughed, now, as her arms finally fell away from her chest, swinging loosely at her sides as she began to slowly pace before the redhead.

“He told me what happened,” she sighed, “and… and how you tried to keep him and Lani calm… to take their minds off of it all.”

Ara nodded sheepishly, unable to meet Ikrie’s gaze.

“Thank you.”

The redhead froze for a moment before her head lifted, finding the dark-haired woman staring back at her with a small, soft smile.

“Oh… o-of course…”

Another few moments of heavy silence fell over them before Ikrie sighed, glancing down at the bag in Ara’s hand before looking back up at her face and jerking a thumb over her shoulder.

“Want to prove I’m not a murderer to him?”

A small smile tugged at the redhead’s lips, as well, as she nodded.

“I’d like that.”

Ikrie turned to lead the way toward the hallway, the redhead following behind her. Just before they reached the door to Kal’s room, however, the dark-haired woman stopped, turning to place a hand on Ara’s upper arm and stop her in place.

“You know even when I was mad, I never doubted how much you care about them, Ara, right?” she said softly, barely louder than a whisper. “You’ve never given me any reason to question that.”

“Even… even after… the other day?”

“Especially now,” Ikrie nodded. “The old Ara would have maybe given up and walked away… not tried to make amends.”

The redhead offered a small smile, nodding.

“Now get in there,” Ikrie said, nodding toward the door behind her.

Ara laughed softly, but slipped around her, gently knocking on the partially open door before pushing it open farther. As she stepped into the opening, she found Kal staring over from his bed, his eyes quickly widening as he recognized Ara.

“Hey Kal,” she said, “how’s my big man doing?”

“Aunt Ara!” he said, quickly attempting to sit up in bed.

“Easy now, easy…” she said, slipping over to his side and leaning down as he reached up to wrap his arms around her and she slipped one behind his back.

“You’re not dead!” he croaked, his grip squeezing her a little tighter for a moment.

“No, I’m not,” Ara laughed. “You’re not getting rid of me that easy, kid.”

Kal paused for a moment before seeming to hold her even tighter, prompting Ara to let out a mock sound in protest.

“I don’t want to…” he mumbled into her shoulder.

Ara paused for a moment, swallowing heavily as she felt the corners of her eyes begin to burn and she squeezed him with her free arm a little, tighter, as well.

“I’m glad… me, too, kid… me, too.”


	24. Flashback

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by imagine0314

“Hello?”

Anukai froze at the dinner table. The user ID read like the call was coming from Ara, but the voice wasn’t one she recognized.  
  
“Who is this?”   
  
“Ah, yeah, this is Jira. I run that tavern at the west end of the city. You know the one--seen you around here sometimes.”

“Why are you calling from Ara’s Focus?”

“She’s in a bad place. Fire and spit, girl, you need to come pick up your sister.”  
  
The redhead sighed, the cold fear that Ara had backslid into her old habits sinking into her stomach.   
  
“Ugh, not again,” Anukai muttered, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Nah...it’s not like that,” Jira said, her gravelly voice softening. “Hasn’t been like that for quite some years now, least not on my watch. But you still need to get here. Now.”

The redhead quickly agreed, ending the call with a tap. Whatever trouble Ara had gotten into, she guessed it was bad.   
  
“Everything all right?” 

Ikrie’s voice broke through her wife’s look of frustration and worry, the dark-haired woman’s knowing gaze catching hers across the table despite the squeals of their increasingly excited children.  
  
“It’s Ara. Something’s wrong,” Anukai said, her eyes turning icy and causing Ikrie to grimace.

“What’s wrong with Aunt Ara?” Lani asked, the little girl looking rapidly between her mothers with confusion.

“Nothing, baby,” Ikrie began. “Mama’s just going to go check on her.”

“But--”

“Lani, please just finish your food,” Ikrie responded, a little more sternly this time. “It’ll be okay.”  
  
“Yeah, _Lani,_ finish your food!” Kal taunted in a sing-song voice.

“Kal--”

“I’m gonna go,” Anukai said quickly, rising from her seat and slipping on her boots. “You’ll be okay with them for a bit?”  
  
“Don’t worry about us,” Ikrie said, her eyes betraying the concern rising in her chest. “I can _manage_ these two.”   
  
Anukai walked over and leaned down to kiss her wife’s temple, quickly turning toward the door while Lani and Kal stared after her in wide-eyed surprise.

“You two be good, okay? Don’t give your mom a hard time while I’m gone,” Anukai called behind her, desperately trying to disguise the urgency she felt.  
  
The door closed, the redhead breaking off into a sprint.

  
\------

The Oseram tavern was low-lit with a welcoming warmth, the interior filled with mingling bodies and the typical sort of rowdiness the end of the week tended to bring. But despite the good-natured atmosphere, Anukai couldn’t help but feel the hair on the back of her neck stand up, a feeling she could only call _dread_ welling up inside her. Green-gold eyes began to scan the room for any sign of her sister, her head perking up when she caught the bartender’s eye in the distance.

The stout older woman waved at the redhead, pointing her in the direction of a somewhat isolated booth. Anukai pushed through the crowd, slinking her body past the tight press of the bar’s patrons until she found a clearing where Jira had planted herself, as if standing guard.  
  
As Anukai approached, the older Oseram nodded and the anxiety in the redhead’s stomach continued to twist and churn, becoming stronger as she approached. The former Banuk found herself wondering why the feeling was suddenly so pervasive. Was it coming from--?

_She feels him pressed against her._   
  
Anukai shook her head, blinking away the strange sensation. 

“Made good time,” Jira said, arms crossed over her chest.  
  
“You sounded serious,” Anukai replied, her jaw tight.   
  
“Steel to my bones,” Jira agreed.

The bartender finally stepped aside to reveal Ara, the short-haired redhead curled in on herself, her knees tucked to her chest while she sat huddled in the corner of the elongated seat.

Anukai stiffened, the wave of fear and pain and dread increasing tenfold. She had no doubt now that Ara was the source, their shared connection exposing her to everything her sister felt.  
  
“What the hell happened to her?”

“No idea. Saw her making her usual rounds, tryin’ to find somebody who looks sweet an’ talks sweeter. Had some guy in the corner with her. Didn’t recognize him, but tonight’s one of our busy ones. Was crowded. Y’know I try to keep an eye out for my regulars but I didn’t catch anything obviously upsetting,” Jira said with a shrug, causing her tattooed shoulders to rise. “Next thing I knew he was gone and she was here. Tried to get her to talk to me but got nothin’. Used her Focus after that and you were at the top of her contact list. Got worried.”

“Thanks, Jira,” Anukai said. “I can take it from here.”  
  
“Y’sure? I mean...I’ve got customers waiting but hammer to steel, I’ve always liked Ara. She gonna be okay?”

“I’ve got this,” Anukai reassured. “Thank you, really.”

The bartender nodded and walked off, leaving the two women alone for the first time, though Ara hadn’t moved. Anukai slid into the seat until she was so close the fear and hurt emanating from Ara felt like a concussive force against her chest.  
  
“Ara, talk to me,” Anukai said, trying to be gentle despite having to speak over the din of the patrons.

The short-haired redhead looked up, her eyes reddened and face tear-streaked. She took a deep breath before pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes.  
  
“It’s so fucking stupid,” Ara said, her tone somewhere between laughing and crying.   
  
“Obviously it’s not,” Anukai coaxed. “Something _happened_. You think I can’t feel this?”

Ara swallowed, pressing her lips thin before wiping at her eyes. “I was just...there was a guy. Seemed nice enough. We were talking...after a while I realized I wasn’t into it. T-tried to leave.”  
  
“Did that piece of shit do something to you?”   
  
“He...um...he just grabbed my wrist. Held me there for a second,” Ara’s voice trembled. “Don’t...don’t like being held…like that”

_She feels him pressed against her._

_His weight trapping her body._ _  
_ _  
_ _His hands holding her wrists._

_She tries to struggle, tries to fight._ _  
_ _  
_ _Every movement is a violation._ _  
_ _  
_ _He doesn’t stop._

_He doesn’t stop._

_He doesn’t stop._

Anukai gasped for air, her eyes wide as the deluge of memory hit her like a brick. She knew instantly where the scenes must fit in her mirror’s complicated past, the conclusion causing her to feel sick.  
  
“Don’t like being held like that.” Ara muttered to herself again, her grip around her knees tightening. “Don’t like it…”

Anukai shook her head once more in order to compose herself and proceeded to wrap an arm around her fellow redhead’s back. 

“Yeah, I know, Ara. I _know._ It’s okay. We’re going to go home now.”

Ara lifted her head once more, a pleading, worried look crossing her face. Anukai didn’t need to hear the words to understand the question.  
  
“You’re staying at my place, not leaving you alone. Come on,” the braided redhead assured, gently lifting Ara and letting her sister’s weight lean into her side as they began to rise to their feet. 

Anukai tucked her arm around Ara’s waist, guiding her twin image out of the bar slowly but surely, neither of them seeming to take a full breath until they were outside in the fresh night air.

_She feels him pressed against her._

Anukai willed the memory away, far enough, at least, to begin moving them in the direction of her apartment, her teeth gritted with the effort.

“Come on, Ara. Let’s go home.”   
  
\------

“Aunt Ara!” Lani shouted, her gray-hazel eyes lighting up.  
  
The two women stood in the doorway, the girl jumping toward them excitedly while Kal followed a few feet behind. Anukai quickly kicked off her boots before yanking off Ara’s, never leaving her sister’s side.   
  
“No kiddo...she’s not feeling well. She can’t play right now,” Anuaki protested, trying to urge the girl away, teeth clenched once again. Her chin lifted toward her wife in the distance. “Ikrie, can you…?”

The dark-haired woman nodded in understanding. “Let’s go, Lani. It’s nearly time for bed anyway. Kal, you too.”  
  
“But I don’t wanna,” Lani replied with a pout, her face screwing up with frustration. “Aunt Ara’s here!”   
  
“You heard Mama. Aunt Ara isn’t feeling well. We need to let her rest,” Ikrie reasoned, already reaching for Lani’s hand.   
  
“I don’t wanna sleep either!” Kal protested.   
  
“Just who do you think is Chief of this werak?” Ikrie replied, taking his hand in her remaining one.   
  
“Meeeee?” Kal replied with a broad, self-satisfied grin on his face.   
  
“You wish,” Ikrie retorted. “We all know _I’m_ the Chief here.”

“It’s true,” Anukai said, plastering a grin on her face to set her children at ease.  
  
“But Mom--”   
  
“ _Talanah. Kallik._ I am _not_ saying it again. Let’s go. Come on, I’ll put on one of those moving pictures you guys like.”

The offer seemed to distract the little ones long enough to get them down the hall, Ikrie nodding over her shoulder at Anukai who nodded gratefully back.

“Hate...disappointing them,” Ara grimaced.

“You’re not disappointing anybody, Ara,” Anukai insisted, walking her sister to the couch and watching as the short-haired woman folded in on herself once again.

_She feels him pressed against her._

_Pain and fear welling up inside her._ _  
_ _  
_ _Sickness and hunger and exhaustion and cold._

_Bitter, earthy tea and desperation._

_It doesn’t stop._

_It doesn’t stop._

_It doesn’t stop._

A shudder ran through both women at once, a knowing glance passing between them before Ara’s expression cracked, her voice cracking along with it. “I’m _so sorry_ , Anukai...I didn’t want you to…”  
  
“It’s okay. _You’re_ _okay,”_ Anukai said softly, sitting next to Ara and letting the other woman’s weight settle against her once again. 

Ara’s left hand reached for Anukai’s right, fingers lacing together perfectly.   
  
“Breathe, Ara. We need to get this out of _both_ our heads,” the braided redhead said softly.   
  
“I’m _sorry_ ,” Ara said again, “I hate doing this to you. You should have left me there.”   
  
“No,” Anukai insisted. “Not happening.” She leaned her head against her sister’s, identical red meeting identical red. “You’re here. _Be here._ You’re safe.”   
  


\------

Ara squeezed Anukai’s hand, her head resting heavily on her sister’s shoulder. The space between them had finally calmed to a tolerable degree after an hour or two, the pair now speaking in soft, quiet tones.  
  
“I’m always such a mess, and you’re always taking care of me,” Ara said.   
  
“You’re _not_ . And we take care of _each other_ .”   
  
“Still. ...Thanks,” Ara replied, voice still a bit shaky. 

Anukai nodded wordlessly, the two of them settling into comfortable silence for quite some time until a flash of reddish color caught Ara’s eye.  
  
“What is she--?”   
  
“Lani--”

The small girl had snuck out of bed and down the hall so quietly that she now stood before them, an arm’s length away. Ara jumped back in her seat. It was one thing for Anukai to see, but she could never--

“No, don’t let her near me!”  
  
“But I wanted to see you, Aunt Ara! ...I always want to see you,” Lani said, a pout already forming on her face.   
  
“She can’t, I won’t. I’m _not_ doing this, Anukai,” Ara said, gasping for air as suddenly the fear of letting Lani experience what she had overwhelmed her. Her heart pounded in her chest in protest. “I’ll leave before she--”   
  
“But...but I don’t want you to go,” Lani said sadly, confusion lacing her small features.   
  
“Lani, go back to bed! I told you Aunt Ara isn’t feeling well,” Anukai insisted toward her daughter, trying to keep her at bay.   
  
“But that’s why I came out!” the young girl protested. “Aunt Ara always says I make her feel better when she’s sick.”   
  
Ara could feel her head spinning. She’d already nearly hurt the girl with the toxic contents of her memories before she was even born. And after what Anukai had told her about the girl’s increasing ability to share their connection six months prior, she _refused_ to risk exposing her. Every nerve was firing, urging her to run and put as much distance between herself and her niece as possible.   
  
_She feels him pressed against her._   
  
The feeling returned, her newfound fear feeding the memories like fuel to a flame. 

“...She has a point,” Anukai said, her jaw clenched tightly once more, an invisible strain tensing her features.  
  
“Are you _fucking crazy_ , Anukai? You _know_ she’ll _see._ ”   
  
Suddenly, Lani leapt forward into the short-haired woman’s arms, instantly embedding herself in the older woman’s embrace. Ara stiffened, waiting for the inevitable moment when she ruined the girl forever. A moment passed and then another without fanfare, and finally, she began to sigh in relief. 

Ara turned to see Anukai’s strained face, her mirror’s brow furrowed deeply.  
  
“Told you…before. She sees it...if it comes through me,” Anukai grimaced, fighting off the onslaught of feeling. “The rest of you...are less...clear.”   
  
Lani leaned her head against her aunt’s chest before glancing up with a look of consternation.   
  
“Aunt Ara feels sad, not sick, Mama.”   
  
Anukai nodded slowly. “That’s...probably more accurate, yeah, kiddo,” she said, with the realization that perhaps Lani was becoming better at perceiving their connection over time.

Lani hugged Ara tighter, refusing to let go until Ara’s hands came to rest on her back.  
  
“Tell you...what, Lani, how about you stay out...here with Aunt Ara and I’m...gonna go hang out with Mom for a while. Work your magic and make her feel better.”

Anukai stood, the waves of memory from Ara continuing to crash into her. “Check on you two later,” she said.  
  
Ara mouthed a silent “thank you” as Anukai waved her off and quickly exited the living room, leaving only the two of them behind.   
  
The older redhead sighed and hugged the girl tightly against her ribs, her mind settling now that her fears had been put at ease. Instead, she found hints of a soft, warmth feeling entering the corners of her own psyche, the same familiar sense of contentment she always received from Lani through their shared connection. At the moment, it felt like pure relief.   
  
After several minutes, Lani finally spoke, her words vibrating against Ara’s core.   
  
“Why are you so sad, Aunt Ara?”   
  
Ara cleared her throat, unsure of exactly what to say. “I, uh...I didn’t have a very good time tonight. I...met someone who wasn’t nice to me and reminded me of something that happened a long time ago when I used to live in Reva.”

“What happened?”  
  
The older woman swallowed hard, unsure of why she was bothering to say anything other than the intense comfort the girl provided. Perhaps it was better to give her a kinder version now and prevent worse worry in the future.   
  
“I...I met a bad man, once. And he...he hurt me and made me really sick. You know Vansa? She, uh, found me and saved me.”   
  
Lani’s eyes lit up, but she never once moved from her position, almost as if she knew Ara needed her there.   
  
“Miss Vansa saved you?”

“Yeah,” Ara continued, her voice cracking. “She, uh, took care of me.”  
  
The auburn-haired girl wiggled in, impossibly close. “I knew she liked you.”   
  
Ara chuckled. “Yeah, sometimes, I guess.”

“How did she save you?”

“She and I...we...I took some medicine to help me,” Ara said, tasting salty tears in the back of her throat as she glazed over one of the worst nights of her life.

“Yuck,” the small girl agreed. “I hate taking medicine.”  
  
“Yeah, I hated it too, Lani...more than you know. But I had to if I was going to get better. Was the...only option.”

The girl said nothing but shook her head knowingly, causing Ara to once again wonder just how much her niece was capable of perceiving. She took a deep breath, the little one appearing to finally give in to sleep.  
  
“Thanks for staying with me, Little Red. I always feel better with you around.”

“I know.”

_She feels_ **_her._ **

\------

  
  
It was nearly midnight when Anukai finally dared to venture back out into the living room, once she finally felt the connection calm and tranquil once again, all evidence of its previous horrors gone. 

The former Banuk kept her footsteps light, not making a sound as she approached the couch. Anukai stood, gazing down at the two impossibly tangled bodies before her, noting that it appeared horribly uncomfortable with a grin.   
  
She considered waking them, but thought better of it before reaching for the blanket draped over the back of the couch and slowly covering Ara and Lani both, the girl threaded through the older woman’s arms, her face buried in Ara’s throat.   
  
Anukai leaned over, and kissed Lani’s head before doing the same for Ara, causing her sister to stir.   
  
“Mm?” Ara mumbled, still mostly asleep.   
  
Anukai bent low. “If you ever doubt how much I love you, just remember I spent a night quarantining your memories in my head.”   
  
A small smile crossed Ara’s face and Anukai couldn’t tell if her mirror had heard her words or simply slipped back into pleasant sleep.

Either was just fine.


	25. Equinox

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

Kal stood before the polished mirror in the wash room, his chin inclined as he stared back at the image of himself, the blue tunic lit by the faint glow of the metal wings attached to his back. A smirk tugged at his lips as he braced his hands on his hips, puffing out his chest, as he swore for a moment the small light in the center of his chest glowed brighter.

“Stormbirds aren’t blue, you know.”

Grinding his teeth, Kal turned from his reflection to the real-life image of his sister in the doorway behind him, eying the grey tunic and leggings with red lights that ran along her back to the pieces of metal that ran along her own jaw that constituted the jaws of her Scrapper costume.

“It’s a costume,” he shot back, “and for mine—this Stormbird is blue.”

“Not just because it’s Mom’s favorite color, is it?” Lani teased.

“No, it’s not!” he scowled, his hands beginning to bunch into fists about the fabric of his tunic. “At least mine shows imagination.”

“Yours?” the auburn-haired girl shot back. “You’re the one who imagined himself as a machine that could fly, at least mine—”

“That’s enough.”

Both children quickly fell silent as their fire-haired mother appeared in the doorway behind Lani, glancing between the two of them.

“You both look fearsome, and awe-inspiring,” Anukai continued. “Truly the king and queen of the machine world.”

Lani’s face flushed red as she shuffled her feet awkwardly, while Kal tried his best to hide his grin of satisfaction.

“I concur,” GAIA added, appearing behind their mother and glancing between them with a soft smile. “The designs of your costumes truly capture the spirit and essence of the machines that inspired them.”

“You… you think so?” Kal asked cautiously, his eyebrows raising.

The AI woman’s smile grew as she nodded.

“I do, little Stormbird.”

The dark-haired boy’s smile broadened, again, as he puffed out his chest, adopting the pose of his hands on his hips, once again.

“I am no  _ little _ Stormbird,” he proclaimed, attempting to deepen his voice somewhat, “I am a true Stormbird, ruler of the skies.”

Anukai and GAIA exchanged glances before turning back to him, both grinning.

“Truly you are,” the redhead said, before turning to Lani, as well, “and you claim dominion of the earth.”

The auburn-haired girl grinned, lifting her head slightly as her mother adjusted the headpiece portion that the metal jaws attached to.

“Together, you two are a powerful force,” GAIA continued, glancing between them, “conquering air and land.”

Kal’s grin seemed to grow even broader as his red-haired mother laughed, gesturing for both of them to move toward the front door of the apartment.

“Come on,” she said, “you deserve a chance to show the other children in the parade, and it’s close to sundown…”

Both children rushed toward the front door of the apartment, pulling on their boots as the adults congregated by the kitchenette, Ikrie and Anukai sharing short glasses of hearty, dark liquor, while GAIA simply nodded, in response to the toast.

“So… this is what you spent weeks on…” Anukai said softly, elbowing her mate, “lost sleep over… nearly lost your position at the Palace over…”

Ikrie shot her a look as the redhead grinned, sliding closer until their hips touched, wrapping one arm behind her back.

“You happy?”

The dark-haired woman glanced toward the two children as they finished tying their boots and reached for the burlap bags that had been laid on the low table in the living space, earlier.

“Yeah…” Ikrie sighed, sliding an arm behind her mate in return. “Yeah, I really am…”

Anukai smiled wider as she squeezed her mate’s side with her hand, leaning her head toward hers.

“Me, too.”

“Mama, why aren’t you wearing a costume?” Kal asked, approaching the mates and staring up at them with a curious expression.

“Well… I couldn’t decide,” Anukai shrugged. “Besides… don’t think I could match yours, so no sense trying, right?”

She crouched before Kal and adjusted the angle of his metallic wings, taking care to ensure that the lights at the tips of them remained lit by the small battery pack fixed into the contraption in the center of his back.

“Miss Vansa really did a good job with these,” the redhead continued. “You should make sure to thank her.”

“Will we see her tonight?” the dark-haired boy asked excitedly.

“Well… I would hope so, but… I haven’t heard from your Auntie Ara, exactly.”

Anukai noted how both of the children’s faces fell slightly and she inhaled deeply, glancing between them.

“I think she’d want to see her handiwork in action, though,” she offered. “So I hope she will.”

“Me, too,” Lani said, adjusting her costume slightly. “Do you think she and Auntie Ara will have costumes?”

“Why?” Ikrie asked, appearing behind Anukai and bracing her hands on her hips as she glanced down at the children. “Think they’ll be more exciting than us?”

Both children quickly attempted to backpedal, only prompting their mothers to laugh, waving dismissively.

“Your Auntie Ara loved this festival ever since she came to Meridian,” Anukai explained, rising to her feet as she glanced between her children. “I’m sure she’ll be in the spirit, and if she’s brought Miss Vansa with her… she will be, too.”

Lani and Kal both seemed much more excited as they glanced toward each other, for a moment, before turning to GAIA, who stood leaning against the kitchenette counter beside the small family.

“What about you, Gramma GAIA?” Lani asked. “You don’t have a costume…”

“Oh, but I do,” the AI woman said, grinning as she stepped closer and knelt down before the children. “I am dressed as your proud grandmother.”

“That’s not a costume,” Kal retorted, but his grin gave him away as GAIA mimicked it, pulling both children into an embrace.

“You are right,” GAIA said softly, “because it is not something I pretend to be.”

Both children made sounds as if they were groaning, but the older women all caught the hints of redness on their faces that betrayed their true feelings.

“Okay, everyone,” Anukai called, clapping her hands together to draw their attention. “let’s get going, or we’re going to be late.”

With that, the children made sure to clutch the burlap sacks they had grabbed earlier and led the way out of the apartment, leaving Ikrie to lock the door behind everyone. Even if the adults hadn’t fully prepared costumes, they had still dressed with intent for the occasion. Ikrie and Anukai wore complementing orange and red outfits, with the redhead’s featuring openings on her shoulders and neckline low enough to reveal the field of freckles across her skin, only made more prominent by the previous summer months. Ikrie’s remained more fully concealing, with the neckline of hers remaining just across her collarbones, however hers sported no sleeves at all and the lower half of her tunic bared her midriff, also revealing hints of the increased freckles from the summer sun.

GAIA had opted for something that seemed to mimic her appearance from her projections, with a long, flowing dress that always seemed to be in motion about her feet, even when she stopped, in a deep green color.

The streets toward the center of Meridian began to grow more and more crowded as they continued onward, most of the people around them either dressed in their own costumes of some kind, or at least dressed in something intended to be more formal, although a few appeared to have simply shown up in normal clothing, notably holding drinks in hand, already. Anukai eyed them warily as she guided her excitable machines on a path that kept more to the crowds of costumed or brightly-colored festival-goers.

As they reached the square near the bridge to the Palace, the crowds were truly thickening, and the parents made sure to keep Lani and Kal close to them, Anukai keeping one hand on Kal’s shoulder ahead of her while Ikrie did the same for Lani beside them. A few moments later, however, a voice called out above the crowd and the red-haired mother glanced around until she located a figure waving from up ahead. A grin tugged at her lips as she guided the group toward them, eventually breaking off from the main throng of the crowd and coming to a stop before a small group.

“Well, have to say Ash,” Anukai commented, smirking, “didn’t expect you to get so into the spirit of tonight.”

The other redhead smirked, the black and white face paint in the design of a skull following the motion well and giving her a bit of a ghoulish appearance as it did.

“I had another who was very excited and wished for me to participate,” she replied, glancing down to her right, where the strawberry-blonde head of Elias suddenly leaned around his mother, his eyes widening as he quickly rushed toward his cousins.

“Your…” the boy began, but trailed off as his face contorted in thought for a moment, “special clothes—”

“Costume,” Kal supplied, grinning.

“Cost-ume?” Elias repeated, the word sounding awkward on his tongue.

“Mhm,” Lani confirmed.

“Your… costumes… are very good,” he continued, the boy’s face lighting up with excitement, again. “I like them very much.”

“Thanks, Miss Vansa added the lights, but our mothers made the most of them,” Kal said, grinning as he glanced up at them for a moment, prompting Anukai to squeeze his shoulder where her hand still lay.

“Do they… look like… something?” Elias continued, clearly attempting to find the correct words in English.

The children explained their costumes with great enthusiasm, each of them striking poses as they did, and ribbing the other as they spoke, prompting their mothers to exchange exasperated glances, but ultimately grin at their enthusiasm.

“Oh, I can see this!” Elias replied when they had finished. “I do not have… the metal… but Father has… drawn… to look like… you say a Sawtooth?”

Anukai glanced over her nephew, quickly realizing that the paint was not solely confined to his face, but also seemed to run down his forearms and over his hands, with his fingers a brighter shade of silver, seemingly to mimic claws on the machine. With a grin, she glanced up at his parents to find Sorin had slipped in beside his mate, grinning as he watched their son show off his apparent handiwork.

“I didn’t realize you were such an artist,” Anukai said, drawing his attention.

“My main trade is woodworking,” he explained, “but I have attempted some in other forms of expression.”

Ashana rolled her eyes as he smirked, glancing over at her. While both of them wore face paint that seemed to mimic the design of skulls, the redhead’s was made from black and white paint, complementing the black coloring of the outfit she wore, notably a long dress that Anukai had sworn she had never seen her wear before, and contrasting with the brightness of her hair, which was left to remain flowing over her shoulders, as always. Sorin’s face paint, however, consisted of a grey and white design, and appeared to be slightly more rudimentary with more smudged edges than Ashana’s, although Anukai had a feeling her sister’s abilities with painting were to blame. His outfit was almost entirely dark red in color, leaving it in a seeming middle ground between contrasting and complementing his mate’s.

“Sorin does not give himself fair credit,” Ashana chimed in, wrapping an arm behind his back. “He is quite adept at many efforts involving his hands.”

Anukai raised her eyebrows as she tried to hold in a bout of laughter, her mate clearly doing the same, but Ashana simply smirked and offered a sly wink in response as Sorin shot her a look.

“My love, this may not be the time…”

“It is only a joke,” she shot back, turning her gaze up to meet his. “I am appreciative of all your talents.”

Sorin sighed, shaking his head as the other adults laughed, the children too focused on acting out some kind of battle between their respective costume designs to pay them much attention. Finally, Anukai drew the group’s attention and rallied them to join the crowd making their way toward the Palace, once again. As they slipped back into the throng, the parents made sure to keep their unruly charges close, while eying the crowd about them protectively, as well.

“I noticed you did not dress in a costume,” Ashana said, glancing toward Anukai beside her.

“Didn’t have time for one,” she shrugged, glancing toward Lani before her. “Spent all my time on hers.”

“It is quite impressive,” her sister replied, nodding. “You have done good work for her.”

“Of course…” Anukai sighed, “for her, I’d… anything, really.”

Ashana grinned back at her as she nodded.

“I feel the same for Elias,” she replied. “I wanted him to feel a part of this festival, as he had heard much about it from his cousins. There was not enough time to truly build a costume such as Lani’s and Kallik’s, but I was able to locate these clothes and Sorin completed the appearances.”

“And look at him,” Anukai said, nodding toward the children ahead of them, “I don’t know if I’ve seen him so excited.”

“You have not spoken to him enough, then,” Ashana replied, laughing.

“Oh, I get that, with this one,” she said, gently tapping the tip of one of the metal wings on Kal’s back.

Soon, the group reached the bridge to the Palace, and found that the procession had come to a near standstill. Gathering the group about her, however, Anukai began to lead the way along the edge of the bridge, slipping and gently pushing her way through the crowd until they reached the far end, at the stone dais. When they arrived, they found a line of palace guards blocking the final entry into the palace, however the crowd did not push against them. When the guards noted Anukai approaching, two of them stepped aside to allow the small group through.

On the other side of the line, there was much more open space, prompting Anukai to let out a relieved sigh before glancing back to ensure everyone else had made it through.

“Well, the rest of the pack has arrived!”

The redhead grinned as she turned around to find Aloy and Talanah approaching from across the dais, each dressed in outfits reminiscent of their tribal warrior pasts, although the Carja’s notably did not bear her midriff, as Anukai once remembered.

“It can be difficult wrangling wild machines,” she replied, glancing back toward the children behind her and waving for them to approach. “C’mon, show Gramma and Nana the final results.”

The three children quickly approached, skidding to a stop before their grandmothers and excitedly attempting to show off their own costume, their words overlapping each other almost immediately. Aloy and Talanah displayed extreme patience as they let them run their course, admiring the work on both the outfits, themselves, as well as the metal pieces on Lani and Kal and the painting on Elias.

When they had finished, Lani seemed to stare up at Aloy curiously, prompting the older redhead to raise her eyebrows.

“What is it, Lani?”

“You don’t usually braid your hair like that,” the girl said, tilting her head slightly, “or use all those beads. They’re pretty… I like it.”

Aloy smiled softly as she knelt down before her, holding one braid between her fingers and gesturing for Lani to touch the bead at the end of it.

“I used to do this all the time,” Aloy said. “It’s a style from the area where I grew up.”

“The one you don’t talk about as much?” Lani asked tentatively.

“Yes,” the older redhead sighed, “but it still has meaning to me, as it was important to someone very close to me.”

Lani nodded, running her fingers over the dark blue bead for a moment before letting her hand fall to her side.

“Besides, it’s also kind of a costume,” Aloy continued, grinning. “Don’t quite do as much fierce hunting these days.”

The auburn-haired girl laughed, but bit her lip a moment later.

“What’s wrong?” Aloy’s hands slid onto her shoulders, her brow creasing in worry.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Lani replied, shaking her head. “Just… do you think you could show me how to do that?”

The older redhead’s face cracked into a smile, but Anukai noted how her lower lip contained a slight tremble for a moment. Ultimately, Aloy nodded, squeezing Lani’s shoulders gently.

“Of course.”

A moment later, Talanah caught her mate’s attention and gestured toward the upper level of the Palace, prompting them to begin the leading way up the curving stone steps, the Carja taking the lead with guiding the buzzing children with her, leaving Aloy to greet Ashana and Sorin, as well. The five adults brought up the rear of the group, the visiting couple speaking with the older redhead primarily as Anukai and Ikrie walked beside them, grateful to let Talanah bear the brunt of the energy for a few moments.

When the group reached the top of the Palace steps, they found a congregation of nobles and people who worked at the Palace milling about the seating area behind the throne. While Itamen was the most visible in his ceremonial Carja robes, Anukai’s eyes quickly locked on to the small crowd he was speaking with, noting the former Sun King Avad, but also the other two members. A smirk tugged at her lips as she took in Ara and Vansa, who had seemingly decided to dress as each other for the evening, with the redhead wearing the healer’s signature brown jacket and heavy-duty fabric work pants and the healer wearing a black, sleeveless top and brown fabric leggings, with a pendant of some kind hung around her neck on a black, leather cord.

As the group approached, the children quickly spotted their aunt and excitedly rushed forward, effectively ending whatever conversation they had been having, but the Carja royalty seemed more amused than disappointed or annoyed. With a sigh, Anukai approached the group, as well, greeting Itamen and Avad first.

“They’re certainly excited for the evening,” the former Sun King commented, grinning before glancing over at Itamen. “I remember a time when you weren’t so different.”

“Please, brother,” the current Sun King replied, coughing as he tried to hide his expression behind a sip of his drink.

“What?” Avad laughed. “It’s a time for children to enjoy themselves, when so many of our festivals place a large focus on adults.”

“True,” Itamen replied, sighing. “Speaking of events for adults, I must prepare for the opening speech, so if you will excuse me…”

He exchanged another nod and smile with Anukai, Ikrie, and his brother, before turning to follow after a small contingency of guards and one of his security advisors. The couple also excused themselves to check on their children, and potentially save Ara and Vansa from the onslaught they had been enduring. When they approached, however, they found broad grins plastered on the women’s faces, even as Lani and Kal continued to speak quickly.

The healer was currently admiring the wings of Kal’s costume, seemingly ensuring that they were still working as expected, before offering an impressed nod.

“And what did I tell you to do when you saw Miss Vansa?” Anukai chimed in, raising her eyebrows down at him.

“Thank you, again, Miss Vansa!” the boy said excitedly.

“He’s said it about eight times, now,” she replied, glancing up at Anukai with a smirk. “Don’t worry.”

“And you, Lani?” Ikrie chimed in. “Have you?”

“Of course!” the youngest redhead replied, nodding. “Thank you!”

“Hero of the night,” Ara commented, elbowing Vansa playfully as she smirked.

“I’ll take it,” the healer shot back, inkling her chin slightly as a grin tugged at her lips.

Now that she was closer, Anukai noted the pendant about her neck was not the one Ara had worn for years, but a different design made out of a shiny metal. The redhead’s eyes darted between the healer and her sister for a moment, curiosity piquing in the back of her mind, but she ultimately remained quiet as Kal suddenly turned to the rest of their group, waving excitedly.

“Elias! Come here!”

The other boy approached tentatively, but Kal quickly took the lead in showing his costume to Ara and Vansa, even as Elias clearly felt unsure about speaking, himself.

“Your father painted this?” Vansa asked, gesturing to the designs on his hands and his face, mimicking that of the machine that inspired it.

“He did, yes,” Elias nodded.

“Well, he certainly did a great job,” she nodded. “It may not be actual metal, but could’ve fooled me.”

The strawberry-blonde boy grinned broadly, glancing back toward his parents for a moment before nodding in thanks to Vansa.

“Yeah, what she said,” Ara chimed in, leaning against the healer’s shoulder as she surveyed his costume, as well.

Vansa simply rolled her eyes but said nothing as Anukai and Ikrie herded the children away from the women, allowing them to finally stand up, once again.

“I like your idea for your costumes,” Anukai commented, smirking.

“It was Ara’s,” Vansa replied, elbowing the redhead beside her. “She’s just trying to get into my pants, one way or another.”

Ara nearly choked on the sip of her drink she was taking, prompting the rest of the adults about her to laugh.

“Okay… first off,” she rasped, finally bringing her breathing under control, once again and pointing a finger accusatorily at the healer, “that was uncalled for—there’s children here, Van.”

“They don’t know better,” Vansa shrugged, smirking.

“Secondly—” Ara continued, pausing as she clearly tried to think of a response, before ultimately shaking the finger pointing at the healer, “—shut up.”

The others laughed before Ikrie began to lead the way back to the rest of the group, although Anukai caught her sister and Vansa exchanging a look before the healer placed a quick kiss on her cheek. A small smile tugged at Anukai’s lips as she turned her attention to her children, once again, ensuring that they weren’t becoming too restless.

Itamen’s opening speech for the festival was thankfully brief, simply thanking the Sun, as all Carja customs did, and asking for a moment of remembrance as this particular festival also carried the weight of paying respect to loved ones and friends who had passed. Each year, so far, Anukai found herself thankful that the list of those she paid remembrance to was relatively short, but she still found her throat constricting at the thought of a few of them.

With a shared glance to Ikrie, she could tell that a similar feeling had overtaken her, and she reached for her hand, the dark-haired woman taking it, each of them squeezing each other’s in reassurance, while placing their free hands on the shoulders of their children before them. When the somber moment had passed, Itamen declared the official festival had begun, and the first part of it was the customary parade through the city and into the lower village.

The gathered crowd cheered and various musicians, street performers and other such revelry-makers began to break out amongst them, lifting the atmosphere of the city to a seeming fever pitch. The group quickly made their way down to the parade, joining in as they made their way from the Palace. Throughout the route, citizens who chose to simply watch, rather than participate, along with some who simply darted through the crowd, handed candy and assorted sweet things to the children involved.

Many of them seemed particularly impressed with Lani’s and Kal’s costumes, noting the lights that glowed along the metal pieces of them, while others admired the paint on Elias. The parents following behind them couldn’t seem to stop smiling as they watched their children excitedly dart about, running into other children and forming small bands as they sought out more treats, or simply played games that often involved chasing each other about the street.

When the parade ended in the lower village, many people broke off into portions of the fields that had already been harvested at the end of summer, but would not be replanted in winter, where musicians set up to begin providing music for those that wished to join in the dancing. At one point, the children had seemed interested in the music and had wanted to join in, so their parents eventually let them with some prodding from Aloy and Talanah.

As they remained on the edge of the field, Ara and Vansa appeared behind them, passing out drinks and prompting Anukai to shake her head.

“What?” Ara shot back, slipping beside her and nudging her with her elbow. “I had to provide something for the night.”

The redheaded mother laughed, taking a sip of her drink as she watched the small crowd of children move to the music in their somewhat uncoordinated ways, but the excitement on their faces was evident.

“None of you are going to dance?” Ara called, glancing along the line of adults at the edge of the field, smirking.

Anukai shrugged, her face growing hot as she tried not to admit that the thought of it made her heart race. When she exchanged a glance with Ikrie, she sensed a similar feeling had appeared in her, and they both swallowed nervously. A moment later, however, their attentions were drawn by Ashana and Sorin, who had slipped from the group, the blonde man leading his mate on by one hand until they had reached a patch of ground that provided them some room.

The others watched in surprise as they quickly snapped into a pose against each other, only for them to break into motion a moment later. Their steps sent Ashana’s dress in motion, swirling about her and seemingly combining with her long, fiery locks in a blur of colors and motion.

“Just when I think I’m done being surprised by them…” Anukai muttered.

“What, you mean  _ you _ can’t dance like that?” Ara teased.

“I… can’t really dance, at all.”

“ _ At all _ ?!”

Anukai grimaced as Ara quickly down the rest of her drink and tapped on Vansa’s elbow beside her.

“C’mon, we’ve gotta teach these two how to dance.”

“What?!” Anukai spluttered. “N-no, we really don’t—”

“Neither of you even know how?” Vansa interrupted incredulously. “Never tried?”

“Not really necessary for survival in the Cut…” Anukai mumbled.

“You haven’t lived in the Cut in over a decade,” Ara shot back, rolling her eyes. “That’s plenty of time.”

“I-I’m not good with… moving like that…” Ikrie replied, also clearly trying to avoid this fate Ara had decided for them.

“I’ve seen you two hunt and fight,” Ara said, raising her eyebrows. “You can _ not _ tell me that. Let’s go.”

With that, Vansa suddenly took hold of Anukai’s hand, dragging her forward as Ara did the same for Ikrie. When the redhead shot her a questioning look, the healer smirked.

“I’ve danced opposite Ara enough to know how she can move,” she said. “I assume you can similarly.”

Anukai swallowed heavily, but a moment later Vansa had brought her to a stop.

“So I can’t quite dance like the power couple over there,” the healer said, smirking as she nodded toward Ashana and Sorin, “but I can show a few moves.”

“Yes, and there’s children here…” Anukai muttered through her teeth, prompting the healer to laugh.

“Calm down, it’s not going to get like that,” Vansa said.

A moment later, she had taken Anukai’s right hand, sliding it onto her back, before taking her left and wrapping her hand about it. The healer led her in a few simple moves, in her words, that involved making sure that Anukai kept her body close to her partner and occasionally spinning her or both of them about. After a few minutes, they came to a stop and Vansa raised her eyebrows.

“How you feeling?” she asked.

“I… uh… think I got some of that?” Anukai replied.

“You’ve got it,” Vansa winked. “Now, go show your girl.”

With that, she spun her around and pushed her toward Ikrie, finding that Ara had done something similar. The couple approached each other, grinning nervously. As Ikrie reached to brush some of her hair behind one ear, Anukai caught the tremble in her fingers.

“You okay?” she whispered softly.

“Just nervous,” her mate replied, grinning sheepishly.

“Me, too.”

A moment later, Anukai slid her hand behind her mate’s back, as Vansa had shown her, reaching to take Ikrie’s hand in her left before pausing. The dark-haired woman smiled back at her reassuringly, wrapping her hand around the redhead’s metal one confidently. After a few deep breaths, Anukai began to pull her into one of the basic maneuvers Vansa had shown her. Although the motions from Ikrie were much less confident and fluid than the healer’s, the two of them were able to settle into a rhythm that at least matched the music.

After a few moments, Anukai grinned and began the motions for one of the spinning moves Vansa had shown her, turning Ikrie out to her left side and coaxing her into a single turn before quickly sliding back in front of her and locking the dark-haired woman in place. Ikrie paused for a moment, her eyes wide before a broad grin split her face.

“Okay…”

After another few moments of each of them attempting the various maneuvers the other two had taught them, the current song seemed to end and a cheer from the field arose. Anukai finished with one last spin of her mate before wrapping her arm behind Ikrie’s back, holding her in place. They both remained still for several long moments before they grinned broadly. Caught in the moment, Anukai leaned forward, pressing a kiss against her mate, Ikrie reciprocating the motion with fervor. The sounds of disgust from nearby prompted them to pull apart as they smirked, glancing off to the side to find the children watching them.

“What’s that for?” Anukai called, releasing Ikrie so they could walk side-by-side, but taking her hand between them.

“You danced good, but you ended all gross,” Lani said.

“We’re your mothers,” Ikrie shot back, “we’re allowed to do that.”

The children seemed to disagree, but it only provoked them to laugh more. Finally, the group began to make their way back through the village, leaving the other dancers behind. As they did, Ashana appeared beside Anukai, elbowing her gently to get her attention.

“You and Ikrie danced well for your first time, I have heard,” she said.

“Oh, thanks,” Anukai muttered, her face turning a deep red. “Not as well as you two.”

“We have practiced for years,” Ashana grinned. “In various ways.”

Anukai let out a gasp as she glanced over at her sister, Ashana’s smirk deepening.

“You’re worse than I thought,” she jabbed, shaking her head.

“I will only say that I see a similar familiarity between you and Ikrie,” the other redhead replied, wiggling her eyebrows slightly as Anukai rolled her eyes and shoved her playfully with her left arm.

When the night finally began to wind down, well past midnight, the group began to return to their homes. The initial rush of the sugar and sweet treats for the children appeared to be wearing off as they notably dragged their feet on the cobblestoned streets. Finally, though, they all bid each other good night in a central square in the city, each group splitting off from there. Anukai noted with a smirk how Ara and Vansa seemed to head toward the redhead’s apartment, their arms wrapped around each other’s backs.

When Anukai and Ikrie had managed to herd their children back into the apartment, Lani and Kal made no protests about heading to bed, leaving their bags of sweets in the living space before heading to remove their costumes. Ikrie helped Kal remove his, as Anukai did the same for Lani, carefully setting the components aside as the children pulled on their sleep clothes and crawled into their beds.

“You have a good night?” Anukai asked softly, kneeling beside Lani’s bed.

“Yeah…” the small redhead nodded, wrapping her arms around her stuffed Watcher toy as a sleepy smile spread across her face.

“Looked like your costume was a hit,” she continued, running the back of her hand slowly across the girl’s auburn hair, smoothing it away from her face.

“I loved it, and the other children liked it, I think,” Lani nodded, yawning. “Thank you, Mama.”

“Of course,” Anukai smiled, leaning forward to place a gentle kiss against her forehead. “I’m glad you liked it so much.”

The young redhead quickly began to drift off to sleep, so Anukai made sure her covers were pulled up to her shoulders before rising to her feet and exiting the room, flicking the lights off as she left. When she glanced to her left, she found Ikrie leaving Kal’s room at the same time. As soon as his door was closed, they exchanged glances, each of them sighing heavily before Ikrie stepped forward, wrapping her arms around her mate and burying her face in the crook of her neck.

“Lani have a good night?” she mumbled.

“Mhm,” Anukai hummed. “Kal?”

“Didn’t want to close his eyes, but he was already half-asleep.”

They both laughed softly as Anukai ran her hands gently over her mate’s back.

“Did a good job with his costume,” she muttered.

“You, too,” Ikrie managed, before lifting her head to look up at her. “Bed time?”

Anukai laughed but nodded, turning to lead the way toward their bedroom at the end of the hallway. They didn’t bother to turn on the lights as they made their way across the room in the near-total darkness, Ikrie falling onto the bed first. Anukai crawled onto it beside her, making her way to the opposite side before falling on her back with a heavy sigh.

“Did…  _ you _ have a good night?” she asked softly.

“Of course,” Ikrie muttered. “The children were happy, so…”

“I know, and… I’m happy, too, that they were… but also…”

Anukai rolled her head to the side, where she could just make out Ikrie’s silhouette as the other woman pulled herself to a sitting position on the edge of the bed.

“Were  _ you _ happy?”

Ikrie seemed to pause for a moment before silently moving about pulling her tunic off, tossing it haphazardly off the end of their bed before turning to crawl farther onto the mattress, stopping when she reached Anukai’s side, slowly lowering her weight atop the left side of her mate before she placed a soft kiss at the hinge of the redhead’s jaw.

“I am,” she whispered in her ear.

A broader smile tugged at Anukai’s lips as Ikrie’s hands set about tugging at her tunic, as well, eventually removing it, as well as her leggings, before the redhead did the same for her mate. After sliding beneath their covers, Ikrie quickly wrapped herself about her mate, placing her lips against her shoulder in a series of slow, gentle kisses. When she reached her neck, gently nipping at the skin there for a moment, she paused.

“You weren’t a bad dancer,” she whispered, her breath hot against the side of Anukai’s face.

“Neither were you,” the redhead replied, wrapping her left arm under Ikrie and pulling her even closer.

“Think you’d want to practice some more, sometime?” Ikrie continued, nuzzling her cheek alongside Anukai’s as her arms squeezed her tighter for a moment.

“Hmm… I think I could stand that.”

“Perhaps not with the children right there,” Ikrie sighed, eliciting a bout of soft laughter from Anukai.

The redhead leaned her head more into her mate’s as she freed her right arm from her grip and raised her hand to run it gently over Ikrie’s back, her fingertips tracing slow lines across her skin, a broad grin tugging at her lips even as her eyelids seemed to gain weight, threatening to close at any moment.

“Perhaps not with them right there, no.”


	26. Can't Be Saved

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

“It’s a good line.”

“It’s a  _ terrible _ line.”

“It worked that one time.”

“And none of the others.”

“But that one…”

Vansa sighed exasperatedly as she leaned against the bar before her, swirling the nearly empty mug before her as Ara smugly sipped at her own drink, propping herself against the bar with one elbow as she remained turned toward the healer. The duo hadn’t quite made it back to Ara’s apartment after the equinox festivities, with Ara convincing Vansa to take a slight detour that had begun to reach its second hour, and fourth or fifth drinks for each of them.

“Don’t flatter yourself too much,” Vansa muttered, “I only went along that one time because I didn’t want you to say it again… but here we are…”

“Well, see, your plan came back to bite you in the ass,” the redhead shot back, jabbing one finger at her accusatorily. “Well… in one way, in another it kind of prevented—”

“For your own safety, do not finish that sentence,” the healer cut in, her gaze still fixed forward, but her body language instantly conveying the willingness to swing the mug like a weapon, if needed.

Ara laughed, but fell silent, sipping at her own drink before placing the mug on the wooden surface beside her and eying her companion’s.

“Yours almost gone?”

“Almost,” Vansa confirmed.

“Gonna order another or…?”

“Depends, are you going to keep talking?”

“Well—”

“Or—” the healer interjected, “are you going to follow through on any of your claims tonight?”

The redhead’s eyebrows raised as Vansa shot her a look before downing the rest of her drunk and sighing as she brought the mug back down on the counter.

“I’m going to regret this… aren’t I?”

“Regret’s for the morning,” Ara shrugged, staggering slightly but catching herself on the bar at the last moment, “not for tonight.”

The healer stared back at her for several long moments before letting out a huff of annoyance.

“Dammit, you might be right…”

“I mean… I might be,” Ara laughed, leaning in closer to the healer woman and speaking in a lower tone. “You’re also not gonna regret when I do that thing with my—”

“If you want to do that thing—” Vansa said quickly, raising one finger and pointing it sternly in the redhead’s face, “—you’ll stop talking. Now.”

Ara recoiled from her gesture, but her smirk only deepened, one hand reaching up to brush aside some of the stray, fiery locks that had come free from the loose knot she had tied her hair into atop her head, tucking the longest behind one ear.

“So, sounds like a—” she began, but Vansa’s finger suddenly pressed against her lips, stopping her.

“What did I just say?” the healer said, raising one eyebrow. “Not another word…”

Ara remained silent, raising her own eyebrows in response as Vansa slowly began to pull her finger away from her lips, her teeth visibly biting at her lower lip gently.

“Do we have an agreement?” the healer asked softly, after a few long moments of silence had passed.

Ara began to open her mouth, but Vansa’s eyebrows instantly shot up and she closed it, nodding instead.

“We’ll consider that your verbally binding agreement,” the healer sighed, the corner of her lips beginning to tick up until a smirk.

The redhead visibly began to hold back laughter for a moment or two before she finally covered her mouth with one hand, hanging her head as she turned to face the bar, once again. Vansa stared back at her for another moment or two before sighing and sliding closer against the bar, leaning her elbows against it, once again.

“What’s funny, now?” she sighed.

Ara continued to laugh quietly for a few moments before clearing her throat and taking a deep breath.

“Just… what you said… a… a— _ verbal _ —binding, huh?”

Vansa’s jaw worked slowly as she shot the redhead an admonishing look, only to find Ara trying to hold back more laughter.

“You ruined it,” the healer sighed, beginning to push away from the bar. “This isn’t happening, now.”

“No, Van, wait!” Ara said quickly, wrapping one arm behind her back and attempting to pull her up to the bar, again. “Come on…”

“It’s done, Ara.”

“It was a joke.”

“And it pulled me right out of any sort of mood I might have been in,” Vansa shot back, beginning to push away from the bar and against the redhead’s arm with more force, but Ara held fast.

“Van, wait,” she sighed, again. “I’ll beg, if that’s what does it for you.”

The healer paused, raising her eyebrows as she leaned forward against the bar, but kept her gaze fixed on Ara. Although the gold-green hazel before her was covered in a slight sheen of drunkenness, she could still see through them like a hazy window. There was real intent there, almost to the point of…

“Well…” Vansa said slowly, folding her arms before her as she leaned more of her weight against the wooden surface, “when you put it that way…”

Ara’s face lit up in a smirk as she removed her arm from behind the healer, but left her hand in the center of her back, rubbing at it slightly.

“See?” she said. “I do know you, after all.”

Vansa’s lips began to tug upward in a grin as she laughed and shook her head, staring down at the bar for a moment before clearing her throat and turning back to the redhead beside her.

“Any time you want to start, now…”

Ara paused, visibly chewing the inside of her cheek for a moment before sliding closer to the healer, leaning in so she could speak softly and not be overhead by the other nearby patrons.

“Van, please come back with me, tonight,” she began. “Nights like this, the… the idea of going back to my bed alone… just feels so… wrong…”

The redhead’s fingers slowly pressed along the healer’s spine as Vansa found herself particularly aware of the motions, although her eyes never left Ara’s as she spoke.

“There’s a side always reserved for you…” the redhead continued, her fingers now ending in the small of the healer’s back, where her hand flattened so her palm pressed into it gently. “Please take it, tonight.”

The pair fell silent for a long moment or two before Vansa swallowed heavily, only to lean in and place a quick kiss against the redhead. Ara didn’t startle, but the healer felt the hand against her back clench slightly around her jacket.

“You’re right, again,” she breathed as she remained hovering a few inches from her, “it did do something for me.”

Ara’s grin deepened, once again, as her hand slid up from Vansa’s back to gently slide her fingers into the healer’s shoulder-length, brunette curls the two of them beginning to lean forward, once again.

“I can do some more things for you,” the redhead breathed at the last moment just before their lips met.

They remained locked for a moment or two, Vansa finding herself pushing closer to Ara until one hand slid onto the redhead’s side, her thumb pressing into her firmly, coming dangerously close to the hem of her top. A moment later, they pulled apart, once again, each of them notably breathing a little heavier.

“I was counting on it,” the healer whispered, placing a quick kiss against her, once again, before turning back to the bar and sliding shards across it, along with their mugs. “Your place.”

Ara nodded, and released the healer, turning to push away from the bar as Vansa followed. The first step into the cool night air outside brought a shock to her system, and she blinked, her thoughts seeming to clear for a moment as her gaze locked on to the redhead a few steps ahead of her, Ara beginning to slow and glance back as she realized Vansa was not directly behind her.

“Van?”

The healer blinked slowly, but nodded, walking quickly for several steps to catch up until she was side-by-side with Ara.

“Forgot to ask,” Vansa said, glancing over at her as they walked. “Did you actually remember to clean your apartment?”

“Well, I may have been expecting company, so…”

“Oh, so you just knew I was going to come over tonight, is that so?” the healer shot back, raising one eyebrow.

“I mean… maybe it wasn’t necessarily you…” Ara teased, smirking.

“Oh, so I’m second choice, then?”

“Am I your first?” the redhead shot back.

Vansa opened her mouth to reply, but paused, the realization that she had been about to admit something she wasn’t sure she wanted to settling heavily in her chest. After a few moments, she closed her mouth, opting to not say anything as she tugged at her jacket sleeves slightly, folding her arms before her and clamping her hands beneath her armpits against the chill about them.

“Well,” Ara finally said, clearing her throat, “it’s clean.”

The rest of the walk passed thankfully quickly, as the pub had been close to Ara’s apartment, to begin with, and soon the redhead was fumbling with her keys. When she finally managed to get the door open, she practically fell through it, laughing as she caught herself at the last moment. Vansa approached the open doorway for a moment before pausing, one hand on the frame, her teeth beginning to bite down on her lower lip with a force that left her almost expecting the taste of blood. Her gaze remained locked on Ara as the redhead began to tug at her own top, already removing it only steps inside her door.

“Cold out there, would ya close the door, Van?”

The healer took a deep breath, part of her arguing to step back and close the door before her, but ultimately the side that told her to step in and push it closed behind her won. As she did, Ara finally managed to remove her top, leaving only her simple, black, undergarment in place as bunched the dark blue, silk top into a ball in her hands.

“Got cold already,” Ara smirked, turning to Vansa and holding her arms out toward her. “Could use some warming up…?”

The healer rolled her eyes, but stepped forward into the embrace, allowing the redhead to wrap her in it as their lips met, again. Vansa’s hands instinctually slid onto Ara’s back, rubbing at the cotton garment and beginning to tug at it slightly. As they went to pull back, the redhead gently took the healer’s lower lip between her teeth for a moment tugging at it, before letting her go and laughing.

“Someone’s eager to get to it,” she sighed.

“You’re the one who started taking your clothes off the second step inside your door,” Vansa shot back.

“Well… maybe that someone’s me, then,” Ara laughed.

“Like always…”

“Oh?” she said, her hands suddenly falling still on the healer’s back. “Is that so?”

“You  _ were _ the one who begged me to come back, tonight…”

“Because you asked me to,” Ara scoffed. “Guess I didn’t know you  _ expected _ I was going—”

“ _ You _ were the one who said your apartment was clean because  _ someone _ might—”

“Sorry for getting my hopes up!” the redhead snapped, releasing Vansa from the embrace and turning to stalk several feet down the hallway to her bedroom.

“Really? Changed your mind this fast?” the healer said, beginning to follow her.

“Well, now I know what you’re  _ really _ thinking,” Ara spat, glancing over her shoulder at her. “Maybe this  _ easy _ girl decided tonight she isn’t going to be.”

“That’s now what I’m saying, at all!” Vansa shot back, coming to a stop in the doorway to Ara’s bedroom as the redhead threw her top on the floor to the left before falling onto her back on the bed.

“I invited you back here,” she said, folding her hands behind her head as she met the healer’s gaze. “I’m not going to kick you out.”

“Well thanks…”

“So I’m assuming we’re not doing  _ this _ , though?” Ara continued, gesturing between the two of them.

“You know… I’m not particularly feeling it, either,” Vansa said, nodding as she tapped her fist against the bedroom door frame. “If you’re not kicking me out, I’m tired and don’t particularly feel like walking home. I’ll take the couch.”

“Should be a blanket on the back of it,” Ara shrugged, bringing both hands behind her head, once again, as she turned to stare up at her ceiling, instead.

Vansa sighed, pushing away from the doorway and making her way back to the living room, turning off the lamp Ara had evidently turned on when they entered. True to the redhead’s word, she found a blanket draped over the back of the couch, the fabric rather soft to the touch. The healer fell onto the furniture with a quiet grunt, quickly untying her boots and kicking them off before stretching out as best she could and tugging the blanket over herself. Immediately, she could feel how the cushions beneath her had lost some of their plushness, and she could feel several of the wooden supports beneath them through the fabric and stuffing.

Grimacing, she attempted to get as comfortable as she could before leaning her head back against the pillow laid against the armrest behind her. She stared up at the ceiling for several long moments before finally shaking her head, sighing heavily and closing her eyes.

The alcohol began to take its effect, bringing fatigue to her limbs, but not true sleep, yet.

Part of her still felt the hints of a burning feeling deep in her stomach, although it was seemingly doused rather quickly by the heaviness in her chest, where a different fiery feeling seemed to take all of the fuel for its own purposes. Vansa’s jaw clenched tightly as she pulled the blanket tighter around her, feeling her fingers already beginning to ache with the strength of her grip.

“ _ Oh, so I’m second choice, then? _ ”

“ _ Am I your first? _ ”

The healer again felt the answer leap to her tongue, even as she tried to sleep, but in her dreams, she was forced to confront it more fully.

She knew the answer wasn’t on the couch in this apartment.

It was on a bed at the end of the hallway.

Vansa rolled onto her side, facing the back of the couch, as she tried to think of anything else, in an attempt to try to fall asleep. She wasn’t sure how long she spent trying new thoughts and ideas to try to let her mind settle, but failing each time, however eventually she rolled onto her back and sighed, opening her eyes. The living room was dark, but she could just make out the shapes of the furniture about her as her eyes became more acclimated to it.

Her jaw worked tensely for a few moments before she finally drew a deep breath through her nose and threw the blanket aside, pulling herself to a seated position on the edge of the couch. Vansa tiredly rubbed at her eyes for a few moments before letting them fall into her lap, her head turning to stare down the hallway toward the now-dark doorway at the end.

“Stupid…” she muttered beneath her breath before dragging herself to her feet.

Each step barely left the floor as she padded through the apartment, stopping just before the doorway to find the door, itself, was still partially open, as she had left it, earlier. Carefully, she slipped through the opening, not wanting to make any additional sound by trying to move it. The bedroom was even darker than the living room, but she was just able to make out a shape on the right side of the bed, leaving the left almost entirely open.

Biting her lower lip, Vansa carefully shuffled to the far side, reaching for the top of the sheets for a moment before pausing with her hand outstretched. Her eyes flicked toward the dark shape on the other side of the bed, once again, before the same part of her that had compelled her through the front door earlier won out, again, and she carefully lifted the sheets aside.

Vansa slid under them, sinking into the much more comfortable mattress before pulling the sheets over herself. The sounds of motion came from the other side of the bed and she froze, staring at the dark silhouette before her until she saw Ara’s head turn to glance over her shoulder.

“Always come crawling back…” the redhead muttered, her voice rough with sleep, already.

“It’s the bed,” Vansa sighed, but she couldn’t help the smirk that began to tug at her lips.

“Oh?” Ara said, her tone heavy with disbelief.

“It’s… warm…”

The redhead shifted her position more fully, now rolling to face Vansa, it seemed, the healer rolling onto her side, as well. A moment later, she felt Ara’s fingers slide over hers beneath the sheets. When Vansa didn’t move to pull away, the redhead’s hand slid up her arm, gently lifting it to place her hand on her side, the healer’s fingers quickly beginning to rub at the warm body beneath, before sliding onto her back.

Ara shifted forward, sliding closer as Vansa did the same, bringing them close enough that she could almost feel Ara’s presence before her, even if she could barely see her. A strange feeling settled over the healer as her eyes blinked slowly, her smirk turning into a normal grin as her hand continued to slide across the redhead’s back.

“You’re… warm…”

A moment later, she pressed forward into the warmth, let it settle over her, envelope her.

It was better than any blanket could hope to be.


	27. Longest Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a little holiday treat for everyone tonight. 2020's been so, so hard and you deserve some comfort.
> 
> by imagine0314

“Come on, Ara, I’m not gonna let you sulk for the holidays.”  
  
The redheaded woman laid across her couch, the heels of her palms pressed into her eyes. Her sister sat at the end, patting one of Ara’s legs as it rested on her lap.  
  
“It’s depressing,” Ara moaned. 

“You always end up having a good time,” Anukai insisted.  
  
“Yeah, when I have someone to invite!” Ara retorted, sighing heavily. “I’m in a dry spell. And it’s just more and more painful as I get older to see everyone have a partner when I don’t.”

Anukai frowned, continuing to keep her hand on Ara’s shin. “What about Malik? He seemed nice.”  
  
Ara removed her hands from her eyes, one coming to rest on her middle while the other shifted behind her head for support. “I haven’t seen him in six weeks. Just...wasn’t working out. You know how the Carja are, Anukai. I’m thirty-three--”

“You make it sound like we’re practically dead, Ara.”  
  
“No, but--you know. Most of the Carja are settled down by our age. Those who aren’t are either looking for something disposable or hoping you’ll be quick to marry and give them kids.”  
  
“So which was Malik?”  
  
Ara sighed. “Doesn’t matter. Wasn’t working. Don’t really want to talk about it.”  
  
Anukai looked over with a soft expression, squeezing Ara’s leg for a moment. 

“Look, you’ll feel better around family. Plus, Ash and Sorin can’t make it this year--there’s a bad blizzard hitting the east. The kids are already disappointed that they won’t have Elias to play with during Winter Solstice and I’m pretty sure they’ll explode if I tell them their _favorite_ aunt isn’t coming, either.”  
  
The short-haired redhead couldn’t help but grin. “Favorite, huh?”  
  
“As if you had any doubt,” Anukai said sarcastically. “You and Lani are practically joined at the hip. And as much as Kal has his fondness for Ash, he knows you’re the one he can rely on to be around when he needs you.”

Ara sat up, removing her feet from Anukai’s lap as she did so, ruffling her hair with one hand. “Okay, okay, _fine_ , you’ve convinced me.”  
  
“Good,” Anukai said with a smirk, “because Ikrie and I already invited Vansa.”  
  
Ara floundered in response, her mouth going slack and her cheeks burning.  
  
“You did _what?_ Oh, fuck me.”  
  
\------

Two days had passed and Aloy and Talanah’s home was decorated in varying shades of red and gold throughout nearly every room, small candles burning in each window to welcome the return of the Sun. Ara had to admit that it was as good a reason to celebrate as any--they’d even had something similar in Reva, or so she’d heard. She’d never done much celebrating in _that_ city, anyway, she realized as she mused to herself.  
  
It was just beginning to grow dark as the party began, the house slowly filling with more and more guests. Ara stood with her back against the wall, arms crossed over her red-clad chest as she surveyed the scene. She spotted several members from the palace and Lodge mulling around, entertained by some sort of wild story told by the two older women while Ikrie and Anukai were putting the finishing touches on the spread of food displayed on the nearby table.  
  
“Kal, give him back! He’s mine!” Lani shouted, chasing her brother as he ran around the house with her stuffed Watcher.  
  
Ara smirked as she watched the two before clearing her throat and taking on a more authoritative stance. “Come on, Kal. You’ve got your Stormbird. Give Lani back her Watcher.”  
  
“Aww,” Kal whined, his sour expression at odds with his festive gold outfit--no doubt one Ikrie and Talanah had insisted he wear. “But my Stormbird likes to play with the Watcher.”  
  
Ara bent down low between the two children, Lani sporting a frown that was equally endearing in her own Solstice attire. “Maybe you should ask Lani first if it’s okay. Stormbirds can’t just do whatever they want, kiddo. When they go rogue, hunters like your mamas take them down, don’t they?”  
  
The boy’s eyes went wide. “But...he’s not a bad Stormbird! He’s a good one! I don’t want the hunters to take him.”  
  
“Well what does a good Stormbird do?” Ara asked with amusement.  
  
“They, um...they fly and make the air clean?”  
  
The redhead nodded in encouragement. “And what does a good Watcher do, Little Red?”  
  
The girl’s face screwed up in thought. “They keep the other machines safe from danger, right? By watching for scary things.”  
  
“That’s right,” Ara agreed, squeezing the girl’s shoulder gently. “So they work together, don’t they?”  
  
Kal and Lani nodded enthusiastically in return, their festive tunics swaying with the movement.  
  
“So if Lani’s the Watcher and you’re the Stormbird, my little man, is there a game you can play that’s for both of you?”  
  
Kal handed back the stuffed machine toy. “You can be lookout!” he declared.  
  
“Oh no, the hunters are coming!” Lani shrieked, turning to run while Kal followed, bouncing his own stuffed Stormbird as he pretended to fly away.  
  
The children disappeared down the hall, yelps of delight echoing back behind them.  
  
“Crisis averted, huh?”  
  
Ara rose to her feet, straightening her red sleeveless top before finding her twin image looking at her with a smirk on her face, a cup in each hand.  
  
“For now,” the short-haired redhead agreed.  
  
“You’re so good to them,” Anukai noted, handing Ara one of the cups.  
  
Ara shrugged. “Just like to give them...what I wish I’d had, you know?” She sniffed at the cup, the aroma of warm spices and citrus filling her nose. “What is this?” she asked, changing the subject.  
  
“Drink it,” Anukai advised. “It’s good. One of Mo--uh--Aloy’s _old world_ concoctions. Some kind of warmed spiced wine.”  
  
At the mention of her name, the older woman appeared to have been summoned, pulling herself and Talanah away from the other guests. The two wore their own variations on holiday garb, Talanah’s lengthy tunic-style dress primarily gold and white while Aloy’s top was a mix of red and gold with deep red leggings underneath, the pair both looking vibrant and at ease.  
  
“Try it,” Aloy insisted. “Used to be a favorite when I was...well, a _long time ago_ . Thought maybe this year it was worth bringing back.”  
  
Ara took a sip, finding the taste quite pleasant and much softer than the harder liquors she usually indulged in. A feeling of nostalgia for something she couldn’t quite place bloomed in her chest along with the heat of the liquid and she was fairly certain it had come from the elder redhead herself.  
  
“So?” Aloy asked.  
  
“It’s good,” Ara nodded. “Really.”  
  
“The Carja have a version too,” Talanah noted. “I think I made some a couple years ago, if you remember. I say next year we do both and see whose is better.”  
  
“There you go getting competitive,” Aloy chuckled, wrapping an arm around her wife’s waist.  
  
“You wouldn’t have me any other way,” Talanah teased.  
  
The elder redhead smirked. “You’re right. I wouldn’t.”  
  
“Nana, Grandma!” came the shrieks from down the hall, the two children running back to the group of adults.  
  
Kal ran straight for Talanah’s legs. “Oh, let me see you,” the older woman insisted. “You’re almost too big to carry.”  
  
Without a word between them, Aloy seamlessly reached for the boy, helping him up into Talanah’s good arm and hip while placing a kiss on her left shoulder. She then bent down and pulled Lani into her own arms, the two of them in mirrored stances.  
  
A muffled knock came at the door and suddenly Ikrie had navigated through the various guests and bodies to slide between them. “I’ll get it,” she insisted, stealing Anukai’s cup on her way through and taking a sip.  
  
“Hey!”  
  
“I’m your wife,” the dark-haired woman shrugged as she continued to move, “I’m entitled to half of your wine by law.”  
  
Ikrie unlocked the door, finding a familiar face at the entrance. “Vansa! So glad you could make it,” she said, giving the other woman a one-armed hugged. “Come in, come in.”  
  
“Hope I’m not running too late,” the brunette nodded.  
  
“Nonsense. We’ll be here all night,” Ikrie said. “You want something to drink?”  
  
Vansa nodded, stepping inside. “Whatever you’ve got there smells good.”  
  
“Stole it from Anukai,” Ikrie said with a grin. “I’ll get you one. Hold on.”

Ara looked over and gulped. She hadn’t seen Vansa much lately--not since she’d started seeing Carvan, and the last thing she wanted was to make things awkward. Anukai placed a hand on her shoulder in wordless reassurance as the woman began walking toward them.  
  
“Aloy, Talanah, thanks for having me,” she said, addressing the two older women, the children still in their arms. “It’s good to see all of you. Happy Solstice!”  
  
Ara attempted a small smile and Vansa nodded toward her before looking back to find Ikrie waving her down, drink in hand.  
  
“Ah, that’s my cue,” the healer woman said, walking through the group to retrieve her wine.  
  
“See?” Anukai said. “Not so bad. She’s just here as a family friend.”  
  
The short-haired redhead took another swallow of her wine, spices sitting heavy on the back of her tongue. “Mhm,” she vocalized, offering no other comment.  
  
The group began to disperse, Kal and Lani wanted to resume playing while Talanah and Aloy made their way toward the spread of food, each gathering their own small plates. Ara finished her remaining wine, the liquid leaving a satisfying warmth in her limbs as she looked to find more, careful to keep her distance from Vansa.

She meandered into the kitchen, finding the large pot sitting on a low flame. She ladled out another serving, avoiding the large slices of orange and cinnamon sticks. The redhead sighed contentedly. Maybe it _was_ good that she’d come, Ara thought. She always felt better around her sister and the kids, and there was wine to drown the rest out.  
  
Ara sat back, leaning against the counter while she sipped in quiet, the sounds of the rest of the party filtering in.  
  
“You doing okay?” came Ikrie’s voice as she entered.  
  
The redhead looked up to find the dark-haired woman approaching, Ikrie’s hand coming to her shoulder.  
  
“Yeah, fine,” Ara said, swallowing her drink. “Why?”  
  
“You know _why_ ,” Ikrie said gently. “I know you. And I know you get down this time of year sometimes. Anukai told me it took some convincing.”  
  
“Well, I’m here,” the redhead shrugged, the alcohol loosening her ever so slightly. “It’s good. Party’s fun. You know I like having family around.”  
  
“I _also_ know you hate feeling alone,” Ikrie noted, squeezing her shoulder. “And I’m just checking in to remind you that you’re not, no matter who you did or didn’t come with.”

Ara swallowed heavily, casting her eyes away as she nodded. “You and Anukai are always too good to me.”  
  
“That’s because we love you.”  
  
“Yeah, yeah,” Ara said with a grin and a bit of a blush. She cleared her throat before continuing. “So...uh, Vansa still out there?”  
  
“Oh yeah. She’s good at mingling.”  
  
“I always pretended to be good with people but hated it. Her? She’s just...good.”  
  
“Come on,” Ikrie said, grabbing her at the elbow. “Let’s get some food in you. Anukai and I didn’t work all day on this for you to _not_ eat some.”  
  
“Thanks, Ikrie.”  
  
The dark-haired woman reached over, embracing Ara in a tight but brief hug.  
  
“Always.”  
  
\------

An hour or two had passed, and nearly every adult in the home had thoroughly indulged, most now becoming more boisterous, friends and family alike laughing loudly while sharing stories and jokes while Lani and Kal were each intent on devouring their share of sweets.  
  
Ara took a bite of cheese dipped in a fruit spread, clearing the last of her plate and feeling comfortably sated. The room moved in the warm, slow blur that accompanied a long, chilly night of drinking. When she looked up, she found a familiar presence at her side.  
  
“So you think we’ve avoided each other long enough?” Vansa asked, gently leaning her shoulder into Ara’s.  
  
The redhead’s eyes widened and she quickly took another sip of her drink--this time a decidedly harder liquor--in order to catch herself.  
  
“Depends,” she said slowly, “are we good, Van?”  
  
Vansa looked her up and down with soft, slightly drunk eyes. “We’re good.”  
  
Ara breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay,” she said. “Okay.”  
  
“So how’ve you been?” Vansa asked tentatively. “Been a...couple months.”  
  
“Yeah,” Ara agreed, letting her own weight sink back into Vansa. It was comforting to touch her, a body she knew so well and had missed so badly. “It has. I’m okay. I mean...holidays and all. Good to be around everyone. Can’t keep away from the kids, of course.”  
  
“Of course,” Vansa chuckled, her smile wide and genuine at the remark. “Who would’ve guessed all those years ago that aunthood was your calling?”  
  
“Suppose I’m just gifted like that,” Ara said, a blush spreading across her cheeks.  
  
“Well,” Vansa said, taking a swig of her own cup, “that much is true. So...uh, is...Malik coming?”  
  
The redhead looked down and away, her fingertips playing with the rim of her nearly empty cup. She spared a glance at the other woman, taking in the look of her silhouette as she admired Vansa’s deep red dress, the collar tall and the sleeves short with slits up the sides of both legs. She swallowed hard before answering.  
  
“He...we’re...we’re done. Been done, actually. For a little while now.”  
  
“Oh?”  
  
“Yeah. We uh, didn’t exactly align. He wanted what he wanted. I wanted what I wanted. You know how it goes.”  
  
“I’m sorry,” Vansa said, shaking her head. “Truly.”  
  
Ara blinked away the reddening feeling in her eyes. “You know how I am. Can’t ever seem to make it work.”  
  
Vansa regarded her seriously. “He’s an idiot,” she said simply, with no further explanation. She looked down, seeing the redhead’s mostly empty cup. “Hey, let’s grab you another.”  
  
The two made their way over to the table littered with food and drink, each of them pouring something fresh. As they did so, Ara could feel Vansa’s eyes on her, causing her to smile ever so slightly.  
  
“So what about you?” Ara asked. “Haven’t heard much. Guess you’ve been busy with Carvan. Was he not able to make it tonight?”  
  
Vansa grimaced and finished her pour. “Carvan and I are over,” she said flatly.  
  
“Aw, Van, fuck, I’m sorry.”  
  
“You don’t need to be, Ara. Really. It was my choice.”  
  
“You wanna talk about it?” Ara asked.  
  
“Not particularly,” Vansa said, brushing it off. “Here. How about this? A toast. At least we still have each other after all these years. To us.”  
  
Ara rolled her eyes slightly but agreed, clinking her cup with Vansa’s. “To us. Whatever we are,” she said, the two of them taking a deep swallow of the strong liquid.  
  
The two mingled with the members of the Lodge over the next hour or so, talking and catching up as they moved, eventually finding Aloy and Talanah and staying for several minutes while listening to the tale of an old hunt. Ara could feel Vansa’s arm snake its way around her waist but she didn’t dare complain, the alcohol alone giving her reason enough to enjoy it. 

She looked over Aloy’s shoulder to find Anukai and Ikrie in a drunken embrace, the two standing beneath a small palm frond hanging over the nearby hallway, the two of them giggling like children. Anukai glanced up at the item, raising an eyebrow at Ikrie who smirked, leaning in to kiss her several times.  
  
“Eww,” Kal said, taking note of his mothers’ actions nearby.  
  
“Oh hush,” Ikrie said, her eyes never once leaving Anukai’s.  
  
“Moms are kissing,” the little boy said, causing his sister to break into laughter.  
  
Ara pulled Vansa with her, the two swaying together as they approached. “Give your moms a break, kiddo.”  
  
“They kissed!” Kal insisted, causing his mothers to laugh.  
  
“You’re lucky,” Ara said with a bit of a slur to her speech, her arms linking around Vansa. “Means they like each other.”  
  
“And if we didn’t like each other, _you two_ wouldn’t exist,” Anukai joked, ruffling her son’s hair.  
  
Lani looked up at her aunt, smiling shyly. “You and Miss Vansa like each other, don’t you?”  
  
The healer woman smirked, her face going red. “Yeah, little miss Lani. Guess we do.” 

“Enough,” Ara laughed.  
  
“Well you _like_ each other,” Lani began, “soooo…”  
  
Vansa made a choking sound, nearly inhaling her latest cocktail.  
  
“Wow,” Ara said, laughing. “Elias isn’t here for _one_ Solstice and you’re looking to add another cousin already? Cutthroat, Little Red.”  
  
The little girl giggled excitedly, running to hide behind her mothers’ legs.  
  
“Hate to disappoint kiddo, but it’s not happening. You and Kal are all I can handle.”  
  
Anukai and Ikrie glanced lovingly at the group, their eyes glassed with alcohol and contentment.  
  
“You never know,” Vansa crooned. “Could give it a shot. Worked for Ikrie.”  
  
The dark-haired woman blushed intensely. “I do have GAIA to thank for that.”  
  
“I don’t know,” the brunette teased, winking at the other couple. “Maybe if we just try real hard we’ll get lucky. What do you say, Ara?”  
  
Anukai watched as her sister’s face turned dark red, clearing her throat. “Okay kids, you’ve given your aunt a hard enough time,” she said, beginning to pick Lani up while Ikrie did the same for Kal. “Let’s give her some space with Miss Vansa. Besides, it’s getting late. Time for you two to get to bed.”  
  
Ara nodded her thanks before turning on her heel toward Vansa. “Okay, how drunk _are_ you?”  
  
Vansa held her tightly while she laughed, and Ara could feel the sway in her body as she moved.  
  
“Drunk enough to make some bad decisions.”  
  
The redhead stiffened, her frame going rigid.  
  
“What? What’d I say?” Vansa slurred.  
  
Ara looked up at her, her eyes suddenly rimmed red. “Maybe I don’t _want_ to be a bad decision, Van,” she said, gently pushing away from the other woman.  
  
The brunette looked dumbfounded, watching as Ara walked out the front door, her glass still in hand.  
  
\------

Ara stood outside, the cool winter air of the desert sobering her slightly. She had walked several yards away from the house, leaning against the short stone wall, looking out over the mesa. She sipped quietly at her drink, looking up at the moon and stars as she did so.  
  
“Ara?”  
  
“Van, no.”  
  
“Ara, just listen to me okay?” Vansa asked, an air of desperation in her voice as she approached. “You know I didn’t mean it like that.”  
  
“Really?” the redhead asked. “Because it sounded pretty obvious.”  
  
The brunette gently placed a hand on the redhead’s shoulder, Ara shrugging away from her grasp while turning to face her.  
  
“Maybe _you_ aren’t my bad decision,” Vansa said slowly. “Maybe...I made...a bad decision _about_ you. About letting you go.”  
  
The redhead paused, regarding the other woman with eyes that gradually softened. “Van, stop. I’m...I can’t do this right now if tomorrow we’re just gonna...be the way we have been. Don’t...don’t try to tell me this now. I couldn’t handle it if this all just falls apart again.”  
  
“I’m serious, Ara,” the brunette said, her voice wobbly with alcohol and emotion. She reached for the redhead’s hand, holding it tightly so that Ara wouldn’t pull away. “I...I _fucking_ _left_ Carvan for you.”  
  
Ara’s brows furrowed, her free hand shooting to her mouth. “...What? Van, that’s…you’re drunk.”  
  
“Drunk words, sober thoughts,” she tutted, her voice cracking at the end. “It’s true. He was...he...started to get uncomfortable with our _situation_ and our _history._ Told me to cut contact. It was him or you.” Vansa smiled sadly. “I...I didn’t pick him.”  
  
“You...picked me?” Ara asked quietly, her breath nearly gone from her.  
  
“Of course I picked you, idiot,” Vansa said, leaning into Ara’s frame. “I always pick you in the end, don’t I?”  
  
“Van…” Ara whined, swallowing around the tightness in her throat. “I can’t...I can’t do this if you’re gonna leave me in the morning.”  
  
The brunette leaned in, pressing harder against the other woman before she gently kissed Ara. “What if I said I was willing to try?” she asked, her breath a warm contrast to the chilled air against the redhead’s skin.

Ara shuddered as Vansa kissed her again. She’d wanted this for so long that she hardly knew what to do with herself, a tight feeling forming in her chest. Vansa was _clearly_ drunk, but she’d never been a liar. Not once, in all their intertwining years had she ever _lied_ to Ara.  
  
Vansa pressed forward again, one leg slipping forward between Ara’s thighs, causing the redhead’s breath to hitch.

“Have I convinced you?” Vansa asked.  
  
“You _fucking tease_ ,” Ara said, her voice low with _want_ .  
  
“I just know what you like,” the other woman purred, “...after all these years.” She leaned her weight forward, daring Ara to arc her hips against her.  
  
The redhead reached forward with her free hand and cupped it along the side of Vansa’s jaw. “You gotta promise me,” she pleaded. “Promise you won’t be gone in the morning.”  
  
Vansa kissed her again, slyly pressing up and against the gathering warmth between Ara’s thighs. “I want to try to be good at...whatever this could be.”  
  
Ara felt like her chest might burst and quickly leaned forward, kissing Vansa hard and with a newfound eagerness. She finally broke away, Vansa rolling her body into the redhead’s, causing Ara to issue a soft groan.  
  
“You said once that I was in love with a lot of people, but none of them were you,” Ara breathed, her skin flushed and hot despite the night air.  
  
The healer woman nodded in agreement, finding Ara’s green-gold eyes in the relative darkness.  
  
“That wasn’t true, Van,” Ara confessed. “It’s never been true.”  
  
The brunette kissed along her throat, uttering a small whimper. “I think we’ve been at this party long enough, don’t you?” Vansa asked, her hands teasing at the hem of Ara’s shirt.  
  
The redhead grunted softly in agreement. “It’s getting late,” she added. “My place?”  
  
Vansa looked at her with a wry smile. “Mine is closer.”

\------  
  
Weak morning light streamed in through Vansa’s bedroom window, pale pink streaks bending across Ara’s form. She blinked heavily, her body warm and eyes bleary. Vansa’s thin blanket and sheets were pulled up to her shoulders, the bed soft and comfortable.

The redhead stirred, the sensation of Vansa’s breath on the back of her neck, the healer woman’s arm thrown around her waist. The brunette’s body was molded to her own and Ara could feel the movement of the other woman’s chest against her back. She breathed a sigh of relief at the weight behind her, her hand gently stroking against Vansa’s skin.  
  
“Mm don’t go,” Vansa whispered, her voice thick with sleep. “We promised.”  
  
“You sure?”  
  
“Do you see me moving?” Vansa replied, kissing the back of her neck. “I’m holding up my end of the bargain, now go back to sleep.”  
  
Ara shrugged deeper under the covers, nestling her body into the brunette. For the first time since they were teens, it seemed neither one was intent on running away. Neither eager to forget their night together, neither willing to break the trance. She sighed contentedly, her limbs growing heavier once again as fatigue from the night before began to win out.  
  
Vansa grabbed the redhead tighter, nuzzling her face into Ara’s shoulder as she did so.  
  
“Happy Solstice,” Vansa said softly.  
  
“Happy Solstice,” Ara replied, closing her eyes.  
  
She was certain her days would be just a little bit brighter from then on.


	28. Healing Hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by imagine0314

“You need to lay down.”

“I’m  _ fine _ ,” Ara said, coughing wetly.

Vansa cringed at the sound. Ara had been sick for three days with the latest virus to make its way through the trade routes and into Meridian. And though Vansa knew the other woman felt terrible, the redhead was still resisting the healer’s attempts at getting her to rest.

“Ara,” the brunette began, “you sound  _ horrible.  _ You  _ have _ to sleep.”   
  
“I’m--” Ara started, coughing harder into the crook of her arm, “I just need to get this last project done.” She tapped furiously at the interface her Focus projected, the last of a large stretch of work she’d been concentrating on for the better part of a week, entering several more pieces of data. “Anukai’s counting on me. Besides, I can sleep when I’m dead.”   
  
Vansa frowned. She hated when Ara joked like that.

“Fine,” the healer sighed. She couldn’t be angry at the redhead’s relatively-newfound dedication. “But as soon as you’re done…”   
  
“Yeah, yeah,” Ara insisted, her voice a bit thinner and more reedy than usual.    
  
Another half an hour passed before the redhead finally closed the interface, removing her Focus and placing it on the low table in front of the couch. She could hear Vansa working in the kitchen, no doubt preparing tea and herbs, causing Ara to smile to herself. It felt good to have the other woman in her apartment so often, she thought, noting that more and more of the brunette’s things had slowly begun to take up permanent residence in her home. There were jars of medicinals that lined her pantry, machine parts in the corner, and extra clothing that had started to take up the majority of her closet.   
  
Her musing was interrupted by another hacking cough, this one hard enough to hurt her core.    
  
“You okay?” Vansa called from the kitchen.   
  
“I’m telling you, I’m  _ fine _ ,” the redhead insisted.    
  
“Tea’s almost done. I’ll be there in a minute.”

Ara slowly began to rise from her place on the couch, muscles aching despite no real exertion. She stood on unsteady legs, lightheadedness causing her to sway. As she did so, Vansa entered, quickly setting down the hot brew as she reached for the redhead.   
  
“Whoa,” Ara said, seemingly off balance.   
  
“You are  _ not _ okay,” Vansa replied, holding her firmly. “So stop bullshitting me. Come on, I’m taking you to bed.”

It seemed as if all the air had gone out of the redhead, who simply acquiesced.   
  
“Yes, ma’am,” Ara muttered, allowing Vansa to guide her down the hallway to her room.    
  
“Get changed and get in. I’ll be back with the tea,” Vansa advised, quickly heading in the opposite direction.   
  
Ara nodded her acknowledgement, sitting on the bed and slowly pulling off her clothing in exchange for a loose pair of shorts and sleeveless sleep shirt. She  _ did _ feel bad, she had to admit. But at least now that she’d sent what Anukai needed, she could feel a little less guilty about sleeping while the sun had yet to set.   
  
The redhead settled in, pulling down the covers and sliding into bed. She felt exhausted and idly wondered who she had to blame for whatever cold she had managed to pick up.    
  
“Back,” Vansa announced, setting the hot mug on the table next to Ara. “Drink up.”   
  
Ara reached for the tea, sniffing it and picking up a sweet scent. “This a trick to get me to take my medicine?”    
  
“Hey, not  _ all _ of my concoctions are terrible. Some are just naturally sweet--like you.”   
  
“Now that’s a damn lie,” Ara chuckled, her laugh quickly morphing into a cough again.   
  
“Ginger and marshmallow root with some honey,” the brunette informed gently. “It’ll help with inflammation and your cough. So don’t fuck around, and  _ finish  _ it, okay?”   
  
Ara nodded dutifully and took a careful sip, surprised at how good it actually tasted.    
  
“That’s my girl,” the healer chuckled, softly running her fingers through Ara’s hair.    
  
A few minutes later and the mug was empty. Vansa took it, setting the item aside before making sure Ara was comfortable.   
  
“Thanks,  _ Mom _ .”   
  
“Shut up,” Vansa retorted with a grin. “We both know the big, bad, rebel  _ likes it _ when I take care of her.”   
  
Ara threw on a fake pout before grinning, the moment interrupted by another round of wet-sounding hacking.   
  
Vansa’s own smile quickly shifted into a grimace. “Sleep. For me.”   
  
Ara cleared her throat, looking at the woman she loved with genuine appreciation.   
  
“For you.”

\------   
  
Vansa woke with a start, the apartment bathed in pale morning light and her back aching from having slept on the couch. It was the smart choice, she knew, but it didn’t make her any more comfortable.    
  
Suddenly, the sound that must have woken her came again, floating from down the hall--a distant whimper.   
  
“Ara?” she asked, her voice disappearing in the darkness.    
  
There was no response, and so with a groan the brunette sat up, throwing off the thin blanket and began to pad down the hall barefoot. Vansa entered what was usually their  _ shared _ bedroom, only able to vaguely make out the shape of the redhead huddled on the bed.   
  
“Ara?” she called again, a groan answering in return.   
  
Vansa found the redhead shivering hard, the sheets dark and damp with sweat.    
  
“Fuck,” the healer muttered to herself. “Not good.”

“Van…” Ara croaked, hacking hard. “I feel like shit.”   
  
The brunette paused a moment, struck by the image of the redhead before her: pale, shivering, sick. A wave of memory washed over her, and suddenly they were both seventeen again--Ara fresh off the streets and lying on a bed in her father’s clinic. Back then, her body shook from the cold instead of heat. She remembered feeling compelled to care for the girl back then, though Ara had shied from her touch at the time. Now, the redhead readily accepted Vansa’s cool hand on her forehead and the impulse to care for her was stronger than ever.   
  
The healer reached for her Focus, instantly reading how hot Ara was, causing her to frown.   
  
“Let’s get you cleaned up,” Vansa said softly. “Take my hand.”   
  
Ara grasped for the brunette’s hand, instantly feeling Vansa take the majority of her weight. She felt guilty for needing so much assistance, but all she could do was moan and shiver hard at the motion, cool air hitting her hot skin.

Vansa held Ara close, directing her to the bathroom where the healer instantly began stripping her of her soaked nightclothes, her hands sure and steady.    
  
“You’re good at this…” Ara muttered.   
  
“I kind of help the sick and injured for a living,” Vansa said with a grin, attempting to lighten the mood for the other woman’s sake. “Think you can get a shower while I change the sheets?”

Ara nodded, coughing again, the sound deeper than the previous day. “Think I can...manage.”   
  
“There we go,” Vansa encouraged softly, squeezing her hand. “I’ll be back.”   
  
The brunette hurried down the hall, stopping to grab clean linens from a nearby cabinet before moving to the bedroom and removing the soaked sheets, quickly fitting the new ones in place. When she was finished, she moved to the dresser, pulling out fresh clothes for the redhead.    
  
Vansa returned to the bathroom, steam beginning to fill the room.   
  
“Ara? How’re you doing?”   
  
“Not...great…” Ara panted.    
  
Vansa instantly pulled back the divider to find Ara with her knees drawn to her chest, attempting to soak up the heat of the water while continuing to shudder.   
  
“Standing...wasn’t an...option,” the redhead said with a weak smile. She breathed heavily between coughs that wracked her frame.

The brunette instantly tried to hide her worry. Ara was getting  _ much _ worse than she had been. Vansa quickly reached for a clean towel, turning off the water and helping the other woman stand. She dried Ara off, the redhead shivering the entire time as she pulled on her new garments.    
  
Vansa pushed Ara’s wet hair back, slicking it down with her palm before pressing the back of her hand to the redhead’s forehead, heat immediately present.   
  
“Let’s get you back to bed,” the brunette said softly, guiding Ara out of the bathroom and back down the hall.   
  
“This thing’s really kicking my ass,” Ara muttered, lying back down without resistance. “Guess that’s our thing, though, right? I’m always a mess and you’re always taking care of me.”

“Shut up,” Vansa retorted with a smirk. “It’s fine...really.”   
  
As Ara settled down into the clean bed, she coughed heavily once again, the force wracking her frame.   
  
When she finished, Vansa tapped on her Focus once again, targeting the redhead and enhancing the sound. “Take a deep breath,” she instructed.   
  
Ara complied without question, taking one breath after another and trying her best not to cough. Vansa’s lips pressed into a thin line, hearing a crackling sound in her ear.   
  
“That bad, huh?”   
  
“I’ll make some medicine,” Vansa assured.   
  
“Do you even know what it is?” Ara asked meekly.    
  
“Something new, I think. Was bound to happen with all the trade across the continent now.”   
  
Ara’s eyes became wide, a hint of fear in her gaze.   
  
“Don’t worry,” Vansa said, squeezing her shoulder. “We’re gonna get you better. Let me get dressed and I’ll mix something up.” 

The brunette stood up straight, heading for the closet and for the first time that morning finally grabbed a new set of clothes for herself. As she changed, Ara couldn’t help but smile despite her discomfort. It felt good knowing Vansa could navigate her home as easily as her own. The healer threw on a loose beige tunic and olive green pants.   
  
“I’ll be quick,” Vansa said, turning to walk out the door.   
  
“Hey Van,” Ara called, causing the brunette to pause. “You know I trust you, right? I always have.”   
  
The healer ducked her head, a lump suddenly forming in her throat. She swallowed hard, nodding in acknowledgment.   
  
“I’m going to run to my place,” Vansa said softly. “I need some ingredients I don’t have here. I’ll be back soon, promise.”   
  
Ara sank back into her pillow, body heavy, and sweat already beginning to form at her brow. She watched as the woman she loved left the room and listened for the sound of her footsteps as she approached the door, the lock shifting as she exited. 

Sleep took her before she could stop it.

\------

Vansa entered her apartment with the realization that she hadn’t stepped foot inside in over a week. Many of her usual items were missing, having made their permanent residence in Ara’s home. 

She quickly made her way to the shelves containing various herbs, grabbing her mortar and pestle from a nearby counter as she did so. The brunette perused her stock, selecting the exact ingredients she needed: ochrebloom, yarrow, and white willow along with a dash of freezerime root. It wasn’t going to cure anything, she knew, but perhaps it could provide Ara with some relief.   
  
As she gathered her ingredients into the bowl and began to powder them together, Vansa recalled watching her father work late into the night, mixing together various medicines and measuring them all with care. She ground the herbs down, idly wondering if he’d be proud of her now. Would he be glad to know she was still taking care of Ara after all these years?    
  
Would he be happy they’d become something  _ more _ in the last several months?   
  
Vansa recalled the night they’d found the redhead, the memories burned in after so long. How her father had quickly set about running tests, mixing medicine, and brewing something hot for the girl to drink. How Ara had flinched at both of their motions, but after several hours of reassurance, had finally accepted Vansa’s help in getting cleaned up and into a fresh set of thin white scrubs. Her father had frowned at the results in private alongside Vansa, not once letting the redhead see his reaction as he slowly came to realize what had happened to her.    
  
_ “But Dad, shouldn’t we--” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “First thing’s first, Vansa. That girl needs a few good meals and a warm place to sleep.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “But there’s that vendor down in the market, wouldn’t she want--” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “You don’t get to make that decision for her. It’s going to be hard enough for her to make it herself.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “I thought you were teaching me to treat patients. I’m  _ supposed _ to help her. So why won’t you let me?” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “I can show you everything I know about medicinals and surgery, Vansa, but that won’t do a damn bit of good if you don’t know how to  _ care _ for people, which is different. You saw the tests I ran. She’s pregnant, starving, and sick. We can’t choose for her on the first, but seems the least we can do is give her a few weeks to treat the other two and figure out what she wants to do.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “So do I actually get to do anything?” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “Of course you do. Make her something to eat, maybe try to get her to talk.”  
  
_ _ “Dad, that’s not what I meant.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “It’ll make you a better doctor. I promise.” _ _   
_ _   
_ Vansa smiled to herself--her father had been right, of course. 

She quickly siphoned the mixture into a sifting tray nearby, shaking the contents into tiny capsules made of starches and gelatin. When she finished sealing each, she poured the handful into a pouch, pulling the drawstring tight. Before departing she took one last look at the apartment, realizing it had been some time since she’d occupied it with any sort of permanence. The brunette shook her head, reaching for the quilt on the back of her couch, the one her mother had made while she was still small.

With the bundle under one arm and the pouch of medicine in her opposite hand, Vansa left her home, headed back to the redhead’s apartment. 

A thought struck her then as she closed the door:

_ She was going home. _   
  
\------   
  
Vansa arrived to find the redhead’s place eerily quiet.   


“Ara?”   
  
A groan emanating from the bedroom let her know she’d been heard.   
  
She kicked off her boots, making her way into the bedroom. Shit, Ara looked  _ bad. _   
  
“I brought medicine,” Vansa said softly, opening the pouch and setting the quilt at the foot of the bed.  
  
“What’s that?” Ara coughed, feeling the weight of the item at her feet.   
  
“The quilt Mom made me,” the brunette said. “Always made me feel better when I was sick. Just thought...I don’t know, guess it’s kind of stupid.”

A ghost of a smile passed Ara’s lips, her skin pale and coated in sweat. “Not stupid, Van.”

The healer proceeded to dose out two capsules, quickly tapping her Focus as she did. She noted that Ara’s fever was a touch worse than it had been the last time she’d taken her vitals.    
  
“Here,” she said, “Let’s start with two. We’ll increase the dosage if we need to later but this might knock you out kind of hard.”   
  
“That would be a relief,” Ara said ruefully, another deep, wet cough wracking her body. “Sorry I’m making you do all this.”   
  
“No apologies,” Vansa said, cupping the redhead’s jaw for a moment. 

“Van?”  
  
“Yeah?”   
  
“Make sure you let Anukai and Aloy know to keep their distance. No surprise visits,” Ara hacked. “Don’t...don’t want the kids or the elders getting this shit.”

Vansa smiled softly. Ara was  _ so _ different now.    
  
“Don’t worry, I will. Now take this and I’ll check in every few hours.”   
  
“You’re n-not leaving, are you?” 

“Not a chance.”

Vansa lifted the quilt to cover the bottom half of Ara’s body, squeezing her leg gently through the covers before she left the bedroom. The brunette sighed, settling down on the couch before flicking through contacts on her Focus, finally selecting Anukai’s name.    
  
“Vansa? Oh good. I’ve been trying to call Ara since yesterday but she isn’t picking up. I was worried. Everything all right?” 

The brunette eyed Ara’s discarded Focus on the low table in front of the couch, exactly where she’d left it.   
  
“Actually Ara’s pretty sick,” Vansa clarified. “You know how this goes around these days. Always something new coming from from the Port or Tehawus.”   
  
“Is she okay? I’ll come by and--”   
  
“Don’t, Anukai,” the healer warned. “It’s hitting her pretty hard and she explicitly asked me to keep you, the kids and Aloy away. She doesn’t want the rest of you getting it.”   
  
“That bad? Vansa...she’s not--this isn’t--she can’t--”   
  
“I don’t think she’s going to die, if that’s what you mean-”   
  
“You don’t  _ think? _ ” Anukai retorted, worry lacing her voice.   
  
“Look, it’s rare in my line of work that you can ever speak in absolutes, Anukai,” Vansa explained. “But I am doing everything in my power to make sure she gets better.”   
  
Anukai sighed over the call, her exhale slightly distorted. “Take care of my sister, Vansa. You know how much she means to me.”   
  
“I feel the same,” the healer replied.   
  
“I know you do.”   
  
\------

The next day or two passed in a blur, Vansa offering medicine or food or water every few hours while Ara alternated between sleep and near-delirium. The healer’s spine cracked painfully after sleeping on the couch, though she didn’t dare complain and she’d long since lost track of how many times she’d changed the bed linens and Ara’s clothes.

She woke in the middle of the night, unsure of what had disturbed her until she heard the thin, hoarse call from the bedroom.   
  
“...Va-an?”   
  
Vansa was on her feet before she could fully come to consciousness, finding Ara groaning in bed.   
  
“How’s my girl?” the healer asked, her voice just above a whisper in the dark.   
  
“I want to die,” Ara muttered.   
  
Vansa instantly recoiled, a lump forming in her throat as she recalled their darkest night together in Reva--the redhead had said something similar then while retching into a bucket and writhing in pain. And still, after all these years and the distance between them and that moment, it put an icy feeling in her chest to hear it.   
  
“Don’t...don’t say that,” Vansa soothed, gently stroking Ara’s slick brow.   
  
“It’s true,” the redhead moaned.   
  
Vansa took a seat on the empty side of the bed, careful to avoid the dampness that permeated the other woman’s side. She placed the back of her hand against Ara’s forehead, stilling for a moment. She was still hot, but not quite as bad as the previous day. The redhead reached up for Vansa’s forearm, holding it in place in a silent gesture not to go.   
  
“Can’t make jokes like that, Ara. You have to stick around,” Vansa said softly, “otherwise my life will be  _ really _ boring. Promise?”   
  
Ara gave a rough chuckle. “ _ Fine _ . I promise.”   
  
The healer reached over to the side table, procuring the pouch of capsules once more. “I think your fever’s going to break soon.”   
  
“I can’t sleep,” Ara whined. “I’m hot and soaked.”   
  
“I know,” Vansa said softly, stroking back wet strands of hair. “But there’s no sense in cleaning up right now when you’re so close to sweating it out.” She pulled out three of the capsules and offered them to the redhead with water from nearby.   
  
“Now look who wants to party,” Ara snickered. “Thought you said two was plenty.”   
  
“It is, but three’s going to help you sleep through the last of this,” the healer advised.   
  
The redhead gulped down the offered medication before leaning back into place. “Will you stay here until I fall asleep?” she asked, her voice much smaller than usual.   
  
“Of course,” the brunette replied. “Just try to relax.”

Vansa ran her hand through Ara’s hair in soothing monotony and within minutes she could feel the movements of the other woman’s chest begin to slow.    
  
Just when the healer was nearly sure the redhead was asleep, she heard a quiet, raspy voice.    
  
“You know I love you, right, Van?” Ara mumbled.   
  
Vansa suddenly felt her pulse pick up, but she didn’t stop the redhead from saying it--not this time. She’d known they were in this place for awhile, but it didn’t hurt to hear it spoken aloud.   
  
“Yeah, Ara, I know,” the brunette said softly, her voice warm and low.   
  
“Have since we were kids. ‘M sorry I didn’t always show it.”   
  
“We were younger then,” Vansa reasoned. “It’s okay.”   
  
“No, it’s not,” Ara whispered, half-asleep. “You...I asked you to stay with me that night and you did. The whole time, and you’d only known me for a month.”   
  
“I stayed then,” the healer agreed, “and I’m staying now.”

“Stay forever,” Ara begged, her voice tired and weepy.  _ “Please.” _   
  
“Forever,” Vansa said, her words seeming to cause all tension to leave the redhead’s body, her entire frame softening all at once.   
  
Ara sighed heavily, her world narrowing until all she knew was the healer’s touch.   
  
\------   
  
Morning came and Vansa hissed, realizing she’d fallen asleep in a semi-upright position. She started to move, her back and neck protesting heavily until she realized there was some resistance, finding Ara’s hand clasped around one of her own.

The healer smiled, reaching over to feel Ara’s forehead once more, noting with delight that the redhead’s fever had indeed broken, though the left half of the bed and sheets were thoroughly soaked through.

Ara stirred at the movement, looking up to find familiar green eyes.    
  
“You stayed,” she said, a smile passing her lips.   
  
“I said I would,” Vansa grinned. “How’re you feeling?”   
  
The redhead sat up slightly, frowning at the wet feeling of the bed and her clothes. “Kind of disgusting...but a little better.”   
  
“Fever’s gone,” the healer confirmed. “Now come on, let’s get this disgusting girl into a bath and I’ll clean up everything.”   
  
“Hey!”   
  
“What?” Vansa laughed. “Your words, not mine.”   
  
“Yeah, yeah…”   
  
Ara got up slowly but steadily, her cough now drier and more muted, and some of the color had returned to her face. She made her way to the bathroom, stripping her soaked clothes and allowing Vansa to change the bed once again.   
  
When she was finished, the healer waited to hear the water running, wanting to make sure Ara wouldn’t be able to accidentally overhear. Vansa stepped out in the living room and quickly selected Anukai’s name from her Focus, the call going through in seconds.   
  
“Vansa? How is she? I haven’t heard from you two--”   
  
“She’s going to be fine, Anukai. That’s actually why I called. Her fever broke last night. Cough’s getting better, too. If you wanted to come by and see her tomorrow--even with the kids, it should be safe to do so.”   
  
“Lani’s been missing her like crazy. Kal too,” Anukai confirmed.   
  
Vansa smiled warmly at the mention of the redhead’s children. “There’s uh...there’s something else, too.”   
  
“You just said everything’s okay--”   
  
“It  _ is _ okay, Anukai. This is...different,” Vansa said nervously.   
  
“You can tell me anything, Vansa.”   
  
“Well it...it wouldn’t be right away, maybe in half a year, but…”   
  
“But…?”   
  
“But what if...what if I wanted to ask your sister to marry me?” Vansa asked, feeling like all the air had left her lungs. Thoughts raced through her head. Would Anukai object? Would she judge their years of dancing around what they felt? Her heart hammered in her ribs, waiting for a response.   
  
“...Are you asking for my blessing?” Anukai asked, her voice firm but kind.   
  
“We both know she holds you in high regard.”   
  
The former Banuk paused for several moments, leaving Vansa in suspense before she finally broke her silence.   
  
“...Then you have it. But, Vansa, please...don’t break my sister’s heart. We both know she’s had enough of that.”   
  
“She and I...we’ve--there’s been something there since we were seventeen, Anukai. And I just...with everything that’s happened between us and now all of this since she’s been sick, it made me realize nothing’s guaranteed. Life’s too short to keep fooling ourselves. I want...I want to make this forever.”   
  
“Do you love her?” Anukai asked.   
  
“I do, Anukai. I really, really do.”   
  
Vansa could hear the other woman’s grin through the call.   
  
“That’s all I needed to know.”  
  
The healer ended the call, padding into the bathroom to find Ara in chest-deep water, looking visibly more relaxed than she had in days. Lazy curls of steam rose from the bath and the redhead looked up at her with green-gold eyes that looked clear for the first time in days.   
  
“I called your sister and told her you’re doing better,” Vansa explained.   
  
“Thanks,” Ara said. “I don’t know what I would have done without you this last week.”   
  
“Speaking of...are you okay on your own for a bit here? I was going to go back to my place and grab some things.”   
  
A slight look of disappointment crossed Ara’s face. “Leaving?”   
  
“No, idiot, moving in,” Vansa said with a laugh.   
  
The redhead’s expression quickly changed into one of delight, a blush spreading across her face. “Wait...Van, you really mean it?”   
  
Vansa leaned down over the edge of the tub, brushing her thumb across the edge of Ara’s cheek.   
  
“You asked for forever, didn’t you?”   



	29. Blood in the Cut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

The occasional gust of icy air blew across the top of the mesa, whipping with it tiny, frozen particles of snow that cut at skin like small blades, leaving it red and raw to the touch. These gusts had picked up over the course of the day, drawing most hunters’ eyes to the distant mountains, watching for the signs of the grey clouds that had just now begun to roll over the tops of them, sliding over the rocky peaks like a cloak draping over shoulders. The dark-haired huntress at the very edge of the steep cliff-face continued to watch the incoming gray mass, noting how quickly it moved across the bright whites and blues of the snow-covered slopes below it, obscuring them from view yard by yard.

With a sigh, she turned her pale eyes away from the scenery at the sound of approaching footsteps. A girl with hair the color of a strongly-burning fire approached, also glancing past her toward the distant mountains before her gold-green hazel gaze met the pale one before her.

“Still certain about this trip?” she asked, coming to a stop beside the dark-haired girl.

“Afraid of a little snow?”

The redhead shot her an admonishing look as she grinned.

“It was your idea, Ikrie,” she replied, “so it’s not my place to tell you we can’t go… yet.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence, Anukai.”

Her stony expression cracked in a smirk for a moment as she glanced over at Ikrie.

“We should leave soon, though,” Anukai said. “We’ll want as much daylight as possible.”

Ikrie nodded and they turned from the edge of the mesa, approaching the camp set up closer to the rocky cliff-face at the back side of the formation. Upon reaching the first row of tents, they ducked into a small, rather plain one at the farthest edge of the row. There was hardly enough room for two bedrolls with all of their gear piled in between them, their two bows nearly tangled by the modest decorations of colored ribbons and feathers at their ends, but they managed to extract them without destroying either. As soon as hers was slung over her shoulders, Ikrie reached for the sling laid by the second jacket rolled into a pillow at the head of her bedroll, sliding it into a holster on her belt.

“Still not sure why you don’t just favor a bow,” Anukai quipped, shaking her head.

“You’re good with yours,” Ikrie shrugged, grinning, “I have to stand out somehow.”

The redhead laughed softly as she continued to pack her things, eventually rolling her bedroll into a tight cylinder and wrapping the leather cord around its outside, ensuring that it would not fall open. Ikrie followed soon after, both of them glancing around their tent for another moment before slipping back outside. Immediately, another blast of wind blew through the camp and the dark-haired huntress shivered, reaching to pull her hood over her head.

“We should tell Borok we’re off,” Anukai said, nodding toward the far side of the camp. “He’ll probably want to know that two of his best hunters will be gone for a few days.”

The redhead began to make her way toward the larger, more prominent tent at the far side of the mesa, however Ikrie hesitated for a moment, a slight smile tugging at her lips.

“Two of his best hunters…” she muttered beneath her breath, an incredibly warm feeling building in her chest for a moment before she cleared her throat and attempted to compose herself, jogging to catch up to Anukai.

When they reached the chieftain’s tent, they came to a stop, the redhead glancing to the Shaman who sat on a short piece of a cut log stuck in the snow like a stool. He glanced up at her with a curious expression, prompting her to clear her throat.

“I need to speak to Borok for a moment,” she said.

“I am here, child.”

The redhead stiffened for a moment at the sound of the deep voice from within the tent, before Ikrie saw her shoulders rise and fall in a heavy sigh. A moment later, she pushed the opening aside, stepping into the tent, while Ikrie followed close behind her.

“What do you want?” the large man with a noticeable scar running across his forehead said, eying the two girls with an unreadable expression.

“Ikrie and I are departing on an expedition for a few days,” Anukai said, gesturing to herself.

“What is its purpose?”

“To gather supplies to craft new bombs for hunters’ slings,” she continued. “Some of the Oseram who have visited have shared interesting designs that I feel could benefit us, and I wish to learn them, myself.”

The chieftain continued to meet her gaze for several long moments before slowly turning to Ikrie, the dark-haired huntress attempting to hold her posture and gaze steady under the pressure of his dark eyes. Finally, he nodded, turning back to Anukai.

“Where do you seek these supplies?”

“Northeast,” the redhead replied. “There have been herds of Grazers there recently, along with reports of Bellowbacks.”

“Bellowbacks?” Borok replied, raising his eyebrows. “Why do you only take two of you, then?”

“We only need two of us,” Anukai said firmly, lifting her chin slightly. “I know I can trust Ikrie and she can trust me, in turn. We’ll also move quicker, and require less supplies.”

The dark-haired huntress spared a glance toward the redhead, the warm feeling returning to her chest as she quickly tried to hide any form of outward reaction that would betray her.

“You’re sure?” Borok replied. “What of this… Mailen, who has trained with you?”

Instantly, Ikrie felt the warm feeling doused by a torrent of ice water, her jaw clenching as she now struggled to hide how her fists curled tightly at her sides. A moment later, she found an answer leaping from her before she could fully comprehend that she was even speaking.

“We do not need a third.”

Borok’s dark eyes darted toward her, but Ikrie held her ground, lifting her chin, slightly, as well, her pale eyes refusing to break from his.

“You’ll need someone to help with the hunts while we’re gone,” Anukai quickly added, drawing his attention back to her.

The chieftain considered both of them for a moment or two before smirking and nodding.

“You’re practical, Anukai,” he said. “Carved of the purest Banuk ice, I’d say. Go, you two. I bid your hunt goes well.”

The redhead grinned, nodding before turning back to her companion and gesturing toward the exit. Ikrie quickly turned on her heel, leading the way out of the tent and back onto the sun-drenched ground of the mesa, where she exhaled heavily, rubbing at her eyes with a gloved hand for a moment until she felt something come to rest on her shoulder and she startled.

“While I agree we do not need her,” Anukai began quietly, “why are you so adamant Mailen not come? A third  _ could _ be useful—”

“She’ll only slow us down,” Ikrie interrupted, clearing her throat. “We have a—rhythm—to our hunts… she couldn’t hope to interpret it.”

The redhead stared back at her for a moment or two before smirking and nodding.

“Shall we?”

Ikrie grinned in response, nodding before following after her as they made their way toward the rocky trail down toward the valley below. As they reached the head of it, the dark-haired huntress caught sight of a familiar face approaching from the left, and her stomach instantly clenched, along with her fists. As Anukai began to descend the trail, Mailen began to jog to reach them, but Ikrie suddenly stepped forward, cutting her off, much to the other girl’s surprise.

“Ikrie,” she said, confusion creasing her face. “You and Anukai are leaving?”

“For a bit,” the dark-haired girl replied.

“Looks like for a hunt,” the dirty blonde girl said, nodding toward the weapons and bedroll fastened to her person. “Just the two of you?”

“Just the two of us,” Ikrie replied in a low, steady tone.

“Sure you don’t need—?”

“Borok needs you, actually,” she interrupted, nodding toward the chieftain’s tent.

“Borok?” Mailen replied, blinking in surprise. “Really?”

“Better to not keep him waiting,” Ikrie said, raising one eyebrow slightly.

The blonde’s confusion didn’t seem to lessen, but she ultimately nodded, casting one last glance over the dark-haired girl’s shoulder before swallowing heavily.

“Good hunting,” she said. “Wish my best to Anukai, as well.”

“Sure.”

With that, Mailen turned and began to make her way toward Borok’s tent, while Ikrie watched her go for a few moments. Finally, she heaved a heavy sigh, turning to follow after Anukai only to find the redhead standing at the head of the trail, arms folded before her. The dark-haired girl swallowed nervously but continued toward her, holding Anukai’s gaze as she approached.

“Ikrie…” the redhead said softly, in an almost teasing tone, “did you just  _ lie _ to Mailen?”

The dark-haired girl shrugged.

“So what if I did?” she shot back, smirking before leaning in closer and speaking in a near-whisper. “It was just a small one.”

Anukai’s eyebrows raised in return, but the dark-haired girl simply grinned before placing one hand on the redhead’s shoulder and turning her toward the trail.

“Let’s go before she figures it out.”

The journey to the northeast, away from the mesa, went as smoothly as any trek in the Cut could be expected for half of the day, but by the time the sun was an hour or so past its peak, the grey clouds they had seen from the camp were just about overhead, drastically reducing the amount of actual sunlight. With the clouds came the stronger winds, as well, prompting both huntresses to wrap their scarves about their faces and raise their hoods, leaving only their eyes exposed as they trudged onward.

Anukai had offered, again, to turn back and wait for another day, but Ikrie had simply ground her teeth and refused. If they went back now, Mailen would surely express her… displeasure.

Ikrie had no intention of hearing her out, just yet.

Eventually, when the snow squalls whipped up by the strong gusts about dropped visibility to only a few feet, they finally settled down amidst some particularly thick bushes, seeking refuge between the tangle of branches that helped block out some of the worst of the snow. Almost immediately, however, Ikrie’s mind was no longer on the wind or the snow, but the feeling of the other huntress pressed tightly against her side in their shelter.

Anukai’s arms were folded tightly over her chest, her hands shoved under her armpits as she kept her head bowed slightly, letting the back of her hood block the worst of the wind. Ikrie spared a glance toward her, but found the redhead’s gaze fixed on the ground a few feet before them, and she swallowed heavily, turning to stare forward, as well.

Despite the layers of fabric covering her visage, the dark-haired huntress was afraid that her companion would see some kind of coloration spreading across her cheeks as she felt her face grow hot. Ikrie took several slow, deep breaths, attempting to calm herself, as she adjusted her position slightly.

“Why exactly did you want to come out here, now?”

The dark-haired girl startled at the sound of Anukai’s voice, glancing over at her before clearing her throat.

“I… wanted a birthday adventure, I guess.”

Her companion seemed to freeze for a moment before glancing over at her, confusion evident in her eyes for a moment before they widened.

“It… it is about that time of year… isn’t it?”

Ikrie nodded, feeling the warm feeling return to her face with it.

“I’m… I’m sorry, Ikrie, I…”

“It’s okay,” she replied, shrugging and trying not to let all of her mental power focus on the sensation of her arm rubbing up against the redhead’s. “You agreed to come with, so…”

“Yeah, but… if I’d remembered…” Anukai countered before eventually sighing, closing her eyes for a moment. “I’m sorry, Ikrie, please forgive me. I’m… a terrible friend…”

The dark-haired girl’s heart leapt in her throat for a moment before she swallowed heavily, forcing it back down.

“No, you’re not,” she replied, nudging Anukai with her elbow. “There’s been a lot going on. I almost forgot about it, myself, until recently.”

The redhead still didn’t seem entirely at ease, prompting Ikrie to sigh and shift her position, again.

“You can make it up to me by continuing on this hunt,” she said. “I always enjoy when we’re—when we work together.”

Anukai hesitated for a moment before sighing heavily and nodding, the plume of her near-frozen breath rising from her scarf, as she did.

“That I can do.”

Ikrie grinned, shifting her position and squeezing her hands a little more tightly under her armpits to try to stave off the coldness that was beginning to creep into her fingertips. Within another half hour, the winds had begun to calm, even as the sky remained gray, but the huntresses took it as their cue and clambered from their shelter, setting about on their original course, once again.

By the time they came to a large, frozen lake, the wind had all but stilled, although a light dusting of snowflakes fell lazily from above, the storm evidently refusing to fully quit, yet. The huntresses scanned across the flat, open ground, for signs of lights in the distance, but none were immediately visible. Most machines, save Snapmaws, tended to avoid the lakes and rivers, even if they were frozen, leading most to assume they were not able to operate in water, particularly when it was at such a frigid temperature.

“So… where was this spot you were looking to reach, today?” Anukai asked, glancing over at her companion.

“Just up the side of the mountain, ahead,” Ikrie pointed, indicating the rising slope that began just on the other side of the lake.

“Well… we taking the long way around, or going across?” the redhead pressed further, glancing toward the ice before them.

The dark-haired huntress frowned, tentatively stepping forward and testing the ice’s surface with the toe of her boot. It didn’t seem to immediately crack or give way, but part of her remained wary, as it was only just a two months past the autumnal equinox, and while the Cut remained cold most of the year, Summer did bring quite a bit of melting that often led to the lakes and rivers thawing and then refreezing once the colder months returned.

“Might be safer to go around,” Ikrie finally sighed, glancing toward Anukai, “even if it’s longer.”

“I agree,” the redhead nodded. “Better safe than wet, out here.”

Ikrie paused for a moment before a shiver ran down her spine, prompting her to clear her throat and gesture along the lakeside to their right.

“Let’s get going. Can maybe find some shelter before dark.”

The walk was easy enough, along the shore of the mostly-frozen water, however it was quickly becoming apparent that they may not actually reach the other side before sundown, as they had grossly underestimated the width of it.

“Thought you’d been out this way before,” Anukai said, glancing over at Ikrie.

“I… was near here…”

The redhead shot her a look as the dark-haired girl grinned sheepishly under her scarf.

“I was out this way with Tatai, Urkai, and Tulemak a few weeks ago,” she explained, “and Urkai mentioned this was a common trail for Grazers to follow, but… we didn’t…  _ actually _ come here…”

Anukai sighed heavily, shaking her head.

“I trust, you Ikrie, but…”

Suddenly, her thought was interrupted by the sound of a distant, heavy plodding that brought both huntresses to a stop. They each glanced across the open ground to their right for several moments before reaching for their weapons, Anukai drawing her bow while Ikrie drew her sling.

“Bellowback…” the redhead breathed.

“They don’t wander alone…” Ikrie shook her head.

A moment later, however, both huntresses’ hearts sank and their eyes widened as they realized they were wrong. A single Frostclaw appeared above the top of a small hill nearby, its massive, lumbering form easily plowing through the snow. Both girls swore and looked for some kind of cover, but they were caught with little to nothing to actually help them. A moment later, Ikrie’s blood turned to ice as the machine’s head swung toward them and its eyes turned from blue to yellow.

“Run, now!”

Anukai didn’t argue, instead turning to sprint along the lake’s edge beside Ikrie, the two of them desperately racing to put distance between them. At first, the dark-haired huntress thought that maybe if the Frostclaw saw them retreating, it may wander off, but a loud, bone-shaking roar from behind them told her she was wrong, again.

The dark-haired huntress forced her legs to continue at the dead sprint they had taken off at, even as the snow began to deepen, but ultimately she was forced to slow as the drifts began to reach her knees. Glancing to her right, she found Anukai dealing with a similar struggle, but the redhead suddenly came to a stop, whirling to face their pursuer and drawing her bow.

“No!” Ikrie gasped, skidding to a halt to spin toward her. “We can’t take it out here!”

“If we don’t, it’ll catch us, then what?” the redhead spat.

Ikrie whirled around, glancing about the space they had stopped before noting a rocky formation jutting from the snow to their right. She hit Anukai on the shoulder and gestured toward it.

“Up and over,” she panted.

The redhead’s jaw worked tensely for a moment, but another roar of the machine prompted her to growl in frustration and nod, lowering her bow to take off after Ikrie toward the rock wall ahead of them. As they reached it, Ikrie quickly grabbed for any holds she could find, attempting to climb up toward the higher ground, but she only got a few feet into the air before running out of options.

“Dammit!”

She quickly hopped off the wall, whirling about in place to glance toward the approaching machine, Anukai drawing her bow, once again. Clenching her jaw, Ikrie glanced around before finally inhaling deeply through her teeth.

“One way we can lose it,” she panted, hitting the redhead’s shoulder to draw her attention.

She glanced over at Ikrie for a moment before following her gesture, glancing out at the frozen lake beside them.

“You can’t be serious…”

“I am,” Ikrie panted. “What else do we have?”

Anukai’s jaw worked tensely for a moment or two before she let out a growl of frustration, loosing the arrow on her bow at the Frostclaw before throwing her bow over her shoulders.

“Let’s hope the ice can hold our weight, at least,” the redhead growled before turning to charge toward the icy surface nearby. “Spread out!”

Ikrie was already in the process of aiming off to her companion’s right, giving a few yards between them. As she took her first few steps onto the surface, she didn’t immediately feel it start to give way, or hear the telltale cracks beneath her, but the sound of the Frostclaw’s enraged roar behind her may have easily hid them. After several frantic seconds of sprinting across the slightly uneven, snow-dusted ice, she began to feel the ground definitively shake beneath her and she spared a moment to slow her pace, glancing back toward the shore.

The machine had attempted to follow them onto the frozen lake, but the ice beneath it was quickly cracking and giving way. Even in the heart of winter, it would be hard to imagine a lake that could the weight of such a massive hunk of metal. Still, for some reason, the Frostclaw charged onward, attempting to gain a few feet before the ice finally gave out beneath it, entirely, and the machine fell up to its neck in the frigid water.

Ikrie let out a short laugh, turning to keep racing across the frozen surface after Anukai, only to feel the ground shift slightly beneath her feet. Her eyes widened as she quickly tried to rush forward, but the world seemed to drop into slow motion as she felt her boot punch straight through the patch of ice ahead of her. Before she could even register the cold of the water beneath it, her head had fully submerged.

A moment later, the chill hit her and the air was forced from her lungs in a gasp, freezing lake water filling her throat. Ikrie forced her mouth shut as she desperately scrambled to swim toward the surface, once again, her hands gripping the edge of the icy hole, but the chunks she grabbed only broke off in her hands.

Finally, she was able to find a side that was slightly more resilient and she pulled her head and neck fully above the water, coughing the offending substance and desperately gasping for air. She could vaguely hear a voice calling in the distance, but she was much too focused on the intense, stabbing cold that was settling throughout her body, already soaked through the furs of her jacket and leggings.

The dark-haired huntress continued to pull herself out of the water, scrabbling for purchase on the ice before her, but each time she gained a few inches, she slid one or two back, it seemed. A moment later, something suddenly clattered across the ice, skidding to a stop a foot or so from her right hand. She glanced up to find a metal hook, like from a rappel line, lying on the ice before her.

“Grab it!”

She lifted her head to glance past it to find Anukai standing at the other end of it, several yards away, her eyes wide as her chest heaved.

“Ikrie, now!”

The dark-haired huntress reached for the hook, her fingers shaking as her teeth chattered. After a few long moments, she managed to wrap her fingers around the hook and pull it toward her, taking a more secure hold with both hands. The metal almost felt as if it burned, to the touch, between its temperature and the frigid water on her hands, but she held on for dear life as it began to tug her out of the hole in the ice.

After another long thirty seconds or so, she felt her boots finally clear the edge of the hole and she began to crawl forward, although the shaking that wracked her body made it difficult, and she could feel the tips of her fingers and toes going numb. Once she had crawled a few feet, however, she heard footsteps approaching, and Anukai appeared over her, quickly grabbing the dark-haired huntress’s shoulders and lifting her to her feet.

“Come on, we’ve got to go, now,” the redhead grunted, but Ikrie could detect the faintest hint of a crack in her voice.

“I-it’s… just… a bit cold…” Ikrie managed, although Anukai didn’t laugh, her face creasing more in concern, instead.

The dark-haired huntress still attempted to walk, even as she could feel less and less of her toes, and she kept curling her hands into fists before relaxing them, trying to keep the blood flowing. Within a minute or so, they were off the ice and beginning to ascend an incline. After a few yards of continuing to move upward, Ikrie suddenly tripped over a rock and stumbled forward, dragging Anukai with her as the redhead’s arm was wrapped about her shoulders.

The dark-haired huntress hit the ground with a loud groan, while the redhead fell beside her, but quickly began to curse. Ikrie’s head rolled to one side, but she wasn’t able to see more than a flurry of motion and copper beside her. A moment later, the dark-haired huntress felt her companion beginning to drag her to her feet.

“C’mon, we’re not stopping here.”

Ikrie mumbled a response seemingly in the affirmative, attempting to push herself up, but Anukai managed to pull her mostly to her feet. When they were upright, once again, Ikrie felt herself being dragged forward with even more insistence, the images of rocks, dirt, and snow blurring before her until she found herself in a much darker space. As her brow knit in confusion, she felt herself pushed toward the ground.

“Where…?” she stammered, her teeth clattering.

“We’re safe here. I’ll get the fire started. Keep breathing.”

Ikrie laughed softly, shaking her head as she reached to brush at her frigid, soaking hair, only to find that it felt rather stiff to the touch.

“I wasn’t kidding. Ikrie—”

“Make the fire,” she interjected, “I-I’ll be here.”

A moment’s pause followed before she heard Anukai hurrying out of their shelter, charging out into the wilderness. Ikrie let out a shaky sigh, rubbing her hands up and down her arms as she breathed, pulling her legs in close to her chest, as well. Her clothing felt freezing and stiff to the touch as she desperately rubbed and pressed at it, trying to remove the feeling of ice that had settled over her.

Even with her frantic motions, the chill from the freezing water continued to sink deeper into her, until she could no longer tell the difference between shivers and sobs. Ikrie’s head dipped forward, her chin pressing tightly against her chest as she squeezed her eyes shut tightly. The feeling was long gone in her toes, but her fingers retained some semblance of feeling.

“Stupid… stupid…”

What felt like a few moments later, the sounds of motion came at the entrance of the shelter and she lifted her head. A blur of copper greeted her, and she felt her heart leap for a moment, a fleeting sense of warmth spreading from her chest.

“Still breathing?”

Ikrie nodded, a shudder running through her as she redoubled her efforts to warm herself.

“Hold tight, just a few moments and we’ll get you warm.”

The sounds of branches clattering to the ground came from before her as she watched the impression of Anukai building a pile of firewood until she had made a small campfire. A moment later, she pulled two things from her belt, striking each one together to a small flurry of sparks. After a few attempts, the first hints of flames began to flicker and burn amidst the wood, Anukai gently blowing on them until they grew taller.

Within another minute or so, the true beginnings of the fire were underway and the redhead sighed heavily, turning from her work to Ikrie and kneeling before her.

“Going numb?”

“Just… m-my toes… m-my… f-f-f-fingers…” Ikrie chattered.

“Okay, not good…” Anukai sighed. “Come on, you’ll be no hunter without those.”

“How… t-t-terrif-f-f-fying…”

The redhead smirked before tugging at Ikrie’s jacket.

“Come on, these are only going to make it worse,” she sighed. “They’re going to keep you cold.”

The dark-haired huntress felt her heart begin to race as she shrugged off her jacket, allowing Anukai to lay it on the ground beside the fire before turning back to her.

“Um… and… probably the rest…” the redhead muttered. “You’re soaked.”

“T-t-t-the rest?”

“You know… at least enough to… to not stay… cold…”

Ikrie nodded as Anukai inhaled deeply, clearing her throat before turning to her equipment behind her.

“Your bedroll is also soaked, so take mine.”

“W-w-w-what… about… you?”

Anukai paused for a moment as she began to untie her bedroll, her jaw working for a moment or two before turning back to Ikrie.

“Guess we’ll share.”

Ikrie felt the warm feeling spread throughout her chest, once again, as she swallowed heavily.

“J-j-just like when we were… ch-ch-children…”

Anukai grinned as she nodded, untying the bedroll and turning to lay it on the ground beside the fire, also unfurling the blanket kept within it.

“Yeah, like when we were children… keeping each other alive, y’know?”

Ikrie nodded, beginning to crawl toward the bedroll and blanket before Anukai gently stopped her.

“Let’s not soak our dry bedding.”

The dark-haired huntress nodded, allowing Anukai to help her shed the remainder of her soaked clothing, until only the barest of cloth undergarments remained. The huntresses exchanged glances before the redhead cleared her throat.

“Uh… I can… I’ll…”

Anukai’s lips drew into a thin line before turning around so she faced the far wall of the shelter, folding her arms over her chest. Ikrie’s lips attempted to pull into a grin, but the shivering quickly overtook and she instead turned to removing the last of her soaking garments, laying them with the others before crawling under the blanket Anukai had laid atop the bedroll, covering herself to her shoulders before clearing her throat.

“You can turn around.”

Anukai glanced back over her shoulder before finally turning around, sighing.

“Escape onto the ice…” she said.

“We’re… a-a-a-alive…”

“True,” Anukai sighed, kneeling beside the bedroll. “I intend to keep it that way.”

“Your… bedroll… is a nice start…”

“And does that leave me the rock floor?” the redhead shot back, smirking.

“We already said…”

“Share,” Anukai finished, smirking. “I know.”

Ikrie laughed, but the sound quickly turned into a shiver as she tugged the blanket about her.

“I’m… p-p-p-pretty cold…”

Anukai grinned, rubbing the back of her neck before clearing her throat and glancing toward the fire.

“I’ll, uh… make sure this is… good to go and then…” she muttered.

Ikrie nodded, curling into a fetal position and tugging the blanket tighter around her neck. Anukai made sure a few more branches were on the fire before taking a deep breath. A moment later, she began to peel off her own jacket, eventually laying her outer clothing beside Ikrie’s as the dark-haired girl attempted to hide her roving gaze, her eyes sweeping over the minute nicks and scars across the redhead’s shoulders, as well as the carved lines of the muscles across her back as she stretched her arms over her head.

Ikrie swallowed nervously before closing her eyes as Anukai began to turn toward her. She listened as her companion approached, eventually feeling a tap on her shoulder.

“Hey, don’t go to sleep, yet.”

Ikrie’s eyes cracked open to find Anukai smirking down at her.

“It’s my blanket, you know.”

The dark-haired girl grinned, but released her deathgrip on the blanket, allowing Anukai to slide beneath it, as well, carefully positioning the two of them so that Ikrie was closest to the fire. Once under the blanket, the redhead shifted, pausing just far enough away that the dark-haired girl could feel the vague warmth of the other, but both remained paused for a moment.

“Still… uh… numb?” Anukai asked softly.

“Just… a-a-a bit…”

The redhead grinned sheepishly before clearing her throat and sliding closer to her, awkwardly holding one arm out toward her. Ikrie shuffled closer, accepting the reach of her companion until she eventually found herself wrapped in the warmth before her. A shiver ran down her spine, this time different than those caused by the cold of the lake, but caused by the roughness of fabric undergarments against her torso, the heat transferred from the hot skin wrapped over her shoulders, of the same hot skin against her legs…

“Well, uh… if it gets too… hot… just… let me know,” Anukai mumbled, her lips pulling into a thin line.

“S-sure thing,” Ikrie stammered, nodding.

A moment later, the redhead’s brow furrowed in concern before the dark-haired girl felt her hand reach up to poke at her hair.

“Froze your hair, even…” she muttered. “You sure you’re feeling okay?”

“Mmm… getting there…”

Anukai offered an awkward smile before sighing and leaning her head against the pillowed portion of the bedroll.

“So… uh… some hunting party so far…” the redhead continued.

“Sorry…” Ikrie mumbled.

“Don’t… don’t be sorry,” Anukai said. “The… Frostclaws roam where they want…”

“As… as long as you’re not mad at me…”

The redhead sighed, rubbing her hand slowly across her back.

“Never.”

Ikrie grinned softly as she subtly nestled further into the warmth under the blanket, resting her head atop the pillowed portion of the bedroll, as well, her eyes slowly drifting closed as she hoped that Anukai couldn’t hear how strongly her pulse pounded in her ears.

To the dark-haired huntress, it sounded like drums pounding inside her chest, or like the Frostclaw’s roar, as it shook her bones.

It was dangerous, for now, but… part of her welcomed it.

Part of her wanted to hear how Anukai’s sounded right then.

Was it like hers?

Was it frantic, urgent, out of control?

Someday… she wanted to know.

Ikrie’s eyes slowly cracked open to find her vision obscured by a field of dark red, prompting her to blink several times and turn her head to the left slightly. As she did, the curtain of muted colors lifted to reveal the faint hints of light across the rock walls of a cave overhead. Inhaling slowly and deeply through her nose, Ikrie turned back to the field of red before her, burying her face in it, once again.

As she stilled, she began to feel a steady pulse reverberate throughout her body, pounding against her sternum before rippling throughout her chest and spreading down her arms and legs. Ikrie’s eyes slid closed as she let the sensation sink throughout her, burrowing herself further into the warmth before her, willing the rhythm louder throughout her. Before she could feel her own heartbeat begin to synchronize with it, the shape before her began to stir.

With a slow inhale, she cracked her eyes open, once again, to find a set of somewhat dazed, gold-green eyes staring back at her. Ikrie’s lips instinctually began to curl into a grin as she adjusted her position against the warmth before her.

“You’d think I just pulled you out of a freezing lake,” Anukai muttered groggily.

“Twenty years means nothing,” Ikrie replied.

The redhead’s eyes lit up with the hints of a smile before the dark-haired woman felt a warm set of lips press against hers and she reciprocated the gesture. After a few moments, they broke their lock, leaning their foreheads against each other as the two women breathed deeply, but slowly.

“But we’re still back here…” Anukai finally muttered.

“We had to,” Ikrie replied. “If not for us… for them.”

The redhead nodded, placing a soft kiss against the dark-haired woman before nuzzling her face into the crook of Ikrie’s neck.

“I think the ice has forgotten us,” she whispered.

“It might have,” Ikrie replied, gently running her hands over her mate’s back, “or we just burn brighter…  _ you _ burn brighter.”

Anukai laughed softly, pressing a soft, slow kiss against the exposed skin of Ikrie’s neck.

“If either of us does… it’s most definitely you,” she breathed in the dark-haired woman’s ear.

Ikrie smirked before leaning to press her own kiss against Anukai’s neck, playfully nipping at the skin as the redhead laughed softly.

“We’re not alone, you know,” Anukai whispered softly.

“I know, but if you’d keep quiet…”

The redhead let out a soft sound of shock before redoubling her efforts, pressing multiple kisses into the crook of Ikrie’s neck, but the dark-haired woman didn’t protest. Instead, she inclined her chin, accepting the gestures with a grin.

“As if you’re so quiet,” Anukai breathed in her ear, once again.

A moment later, the sounds of rustling behind them prompted the mates to pause, freezing under their shared blanket as they listened intently. After a few, long seconds, they heard the sounds of a tired yawn and they both sighed.

“Told you,” Anukai whispered.

Ikrie rolled her eyes before placing a soft kiss against her mate’s lips, once again. When they finally pulled apart, the dark-haired woman rolled onto her back, turning her head to glance across the small campsite. Kal was sitting up in his bedroll, rubbing tiredly at his eyes as Lani remained still in hers, beside him.

“Couldn’t sleep?” Ikrie asked.

The boy jumped slightly at the sound of her voice, glancing over before shrugging.

“I slept fine,” he mumbled. “Sun’s up…”

“True…” the dark-haired woman sighed. “Guess we should get up, then…”

As Ikrie sighed and turned back to Anukai, she found the redhead propped up on one elbow to see over her, a smirk on her features.

“Get your sister up, while you’re at it,” she chimed in. “She can’t sleep the day away.”

Kal grinned before turning to Lani and suddenly shaking her rather forcefully, prompting Ikrie to sigh.

“Kallik…”

“What the  _ fuck _ ?”

Both women suddenly sat up at alert, staring over at their children as Kal tried to suppress laughter. Lani’s head of auburn hair was just visible past him, but her ire was undoubtedly directed at him.

“ _ Talanah _ ,” Anukai snapped, letting her full name hang in the air over their camp.

The young redhead visibly cringed at her name before one hand raised to brush her hair aside, revealing her face to her mothers.

“Sorry…” she mumbled.

“It’s time to get up,” Ikrie sighed, beginning to throw her side of the blanket aside. “The sun isn’t as plentiful here as it is in Meridian.”

The small troupe groggily began to rouse, casting aside their blankets and dressing in their coats and warmer clothing, before gathering around the small fire Anukai had lit for them, the redhead already beginning to warm a section of dried meat over it.

“Going to use that already?” Ikrie asked, raising her eyebrows as she sat cross-legged before the fire, beside Lani.

“Start off the day well,” Anukai shrugged. “Besides, we’ll make our way past the village later today, I’m sure.”

The dark-haired woman’s lips pulled into a thin line as she nodded, yawning a moment later. As the motion ceased, she felt a weight press into her side and she glanced over to find Lani leaning against her, her arms wrapped about her middle.

“Tired?”

The young redhead shook her head.

“Cold,” she muttered.

Ikrie smiled softly before wrapping her arms around her daughter, rubbing at her opposite arm and back vigorously for a few moments.

“You know, your mother and I grew up here…”

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” Anukai shot back from the other side of Ikrie, raising her eyebrows. “What for?”

“Must have been hard…”

Both women paused for a moment, glancing between each other, seemingly at a loss for words, before Ikrie cleared her throat, turning back to the auburn-haired girl.

“It… we had to learn to survive quickly, yes,” she said, “but…”

“It’s okay,” Lani interrupted, squeezing Ikrie tighter as she buried her face in her side. “I understand.”

Her mothers exchanged confused glances, once again, before both of them ultimately dropped the line of questioning. As Anukai continued to heat their breakfast, Ikrie ran her hand slowly up and down Lani’s upper arm, while she noted how Kal clung to Anukai in a similar manner on the other side of the fire. When the boy caught Ikrie’s eye, he cleared his throat, attempting to straighten up, but Anukai quickly wrapped one arm around his shoulders, holding him in place.

“Nope, don’t you try that,” the redhead smirked, glancing down at him. “There’s no one to impress here… and your Mama doesn’t mind.”

Kal’s face began to turn red, but Ikrie smiled as she noted how his grip about Anukai firmed, once again. A few minutes later, Anukai pulled the meat from over the fire and began to carefully cut it up, passing out portions to everyone. The two children quickly took theirs and set upon the meat, but quickly paused, considering it for a few moments.

“Not what you two are used to in Meridian,” Ikrie said, laughing softly. “This is Banuk preparation.”

“It’s… very salty,” Lani said slowly.

“Keeps the meat in the cold,” Anukai replied, smirking. “Adds a bit of flavor when you cook it.”

The auburn-haired girl coughed slightly before nodding, attempting to smile to cover up her reaction. Ikrie rolled her eyes before nudging her with her elbow, rocking the girl beside her.

“Be thankful we didn’t make you two hunt for breakfast,” she said. “Give you a real taste of Banuk upbringing.”

Both children muttered what sounded like thanks as they turned back to their food, prompting Anukai and Ikrie to glance toward each other, sighing.

“Kal, Lani,” the redhead began, “we’re not… we’re only joking. Do you know why we brought you two here?”

“To see where you came from?” Kal answered tentatively.

“Mostly,” Ikrie confirmed, nodding. “Your blood runs deep here—both of you.”

The siblings both turned their attentions to their dark-haired mother as she lowered the bite of meat she was about to take.

“Both of us came from here,” she continued. “We were… born here…”

Anukai’s lips pulled into a hint of a grimace for a moment before she quickly hid it behind a bite of her breakfast.

“As much as you have strong blood in Meridian,” Ikrie said, “you do here, too. We… we felt it would be wrong to… to not bring you… at least once.”

Both children’s expressions took on somber tones as they stared down at the ground before them, prompting Ikrie to swallow heavily.

“I… I hope this isn’t a… a sad trip,” she said softly. “This land… the Banuk people… part of them and all of this… is part of us… and part of you…”

Both children nodded slowly, but Lani quickly finished off the last of her food before wrapping her arms tightly about Ikrie’s middle, once again. The dark-haired woman wrapped one arm about her shoulders as she took another bite of her breakfast.

“We understand, Mom,” the auburn-haired girl said.

Ikrie paused before her next bite, glancing down at Lani before squeezing her tighter and glancing over at Anukai. She caught the hints of redness appearing in the other woman’s eyes, and they both tried to finish their food quickly while wiping at the wateriness that followed the redness. Once they were all finished with breakfast, Anukai extinguished the fire and urged all of them to pack their things.

Within a few minutes, the small camp was packed away, and the ashes of the fire were scattered, providing little evidence that anyone had even spent the night in the small cave. With a sigh, and one last check of the space, Ikrie led the way outside, stepping into the bright sunshine just past the entrance to the cave. Almost immediately, the warmth of the sun was cast aside by a cold gust of wind, prompting the dark-haired woman to tug at the collar of her jacket slightly.

“Too many summers in Meridian…” she muttered, taking a deep breath of the chilly air before glancing back at the group behind her. “Come on. We’ve got a climb ahead of us.”

With that, she began to lead the way along the trail farther up the mountainside, Lani and Kal falling in step between her and Anukai. The trek along the narrow, snow-covered mountain trails took another hour or two before they finally slowed, coming to a stop at the edge of a triangular vista that jutted out of the mountainside, providing a view over the far-reaching, snow-covered valley hundreds of yards below.

Ikrie paused at the tip of the formation before turning back to the group behind her, finding Kal only a foot or so behind her, while Lani stayed a comfortable several yards back with Anukai.

“I think we’re here,” the dark-haired woman declared.

“Where’s… here?” Kal asked, glancing up at her.

Ikrie smiled before leading him a little ways away from the edge of the drop-off, closer to his sister and red-haired mother. When they came to a stop, the dark-haired woman knelt in the snow, gesturing for the children to come closer. Anukai carefully knelt behind them, a soft, almost sad smile on her lips.

“We’ve made it, I think,” Ikrie repeated, glancing between the two of them.

“You already said that,” Kal replied in confusion. “Made it where?”

The dark-haired woman took a slow, deep breath, before continuing.

“Where your grandparents rest.”

Both children recoiled, eyes widening in alarm and confusion.

“I don’t mean Grandma Aloy and Nana Talanah and Gramma GAIA,” Ikrie said quickly, “they’re back in Meridian. I…”

She trailed off, glancing toward Anukai for a moment as the redhead nodded encouragingly.

“Your mother and I were raised here, like I said,” Ikrie continued. “We were raised by parents… Banuk parents… and… around the time we were considered adults… they…”

Ikrie found her throat closing up as she bowed her head forward for a moment, several locks of dark hair that had broken free of the ponytail she had tied it into earlier hanging in her face. A moment later, she felt a hand grip her upper arm and she glanced up to find Kal reaching toward her, a look of understanding tempered with sadness on his face.

“They passed on,” Ikrie finally finished, glancing between Kal and Lani, “passed away.”

Lani’s face finally seemed to crack in realization as hints of sadness also began to settle over her expression.

“You… never got to meet them, and… I’m sad that you didn’t,” the dark-haired woman continued. “They… they would have loved you… in their own Banuk way, but… loved you, all the same.”

Both Kal and Lani swallowed heavily as Ikrie felt her son squeeze her arm reassuringly, prompting her to smile softly.

“This is… where they’re buried?” he asked tentatively.

“Where they’re buried is… likely forgotten,” Ikrie sighed, “but for the Banuk, it’s not where your body rests that matters… it’s where your song lingers.”

Both children looked to her curiously as the dark-haired woman swallowed heavily.

“In Banuk culture… every person… every thing… has a song. It is constantly written, adding new verses until… until it is sung in memorial,” she continued. “When… when our parents—passed—we sang their songs into the ice… immortalized them, as the Banuk would have for any of their people…”

Ikrie paused as she wiped at her eyes with the back of one hand, sniffling slightly before clearing her throat and turning her gaze back to her children.

“This is the place because… I can hear their songs strongly, here.”

Lani and Kal glanced about them as Ikrie smiled softly.

“It reverberates through the ice… echoes off the mountainsides… calls on the wind… and… and here I… I can hear them strongly…” she said, “and… and I think you two should hear it… hear… them.”

Both children fell still, Lani’s eyes closing as Kal’s gaze grew unfocused, staring at the ground before him. Ikrie took a deep, slow breath as her eyes slid closed, her head inclining slightly as she listened to the sounds about her. For the first time in over twenty years, she swore she could hear the sound of voices nearly forgotten, and something tight gripped at her chest. A sound like a sob tore itself from her involuntarily, as she bowed her head, although her eyes remained closed. A moment later, two sets of smaller arms wrapped about her, squeezing her tightly in their embrace.

Ikrie returned it, burying her head between Lani’s and Kal’s as she held her children tightly, feeling their warmth and strength against her even as the echoes of the decades-old songs echoed about her. A moment later, she felt a pair of larger, stronger arms wrap about her and the children, as well, and she felt Anukai’s head come to rest against hers, as well.

“Can you hear them… Kallik? Talanah?”

Both children nodded as the group embrace grew even tighter, Ikrie’s eyes squeezing shut even tighter as hot tears began to roll down her cheeks.

“You make them proud,” she whispered. “Both of you.”

After several long moments, the family slowly began to break their embrace, Ikrie cupping each of her children’s faces with one hand as she ran her thumbs across their cheeks.

“Like I said,” she managed, softly, “your blood runs deep here, too. We wanted you to know that.”

“We do,” Lani replied, nodding.

Kal nodded firmly in agreement, as well, as Ikrie sniffled slightly, smiling despite the tears that still managed to run down her face, despite the chilly wind whipping about them.

“Mom, does… do you two also have… songs… here?” Kal asked tentatively.

Both women exchanged glances before swallowing heavily.

“At least part of them are here, yes,” Ikrie nodded. “Our songs carry beyond Banuk lands, though, and…”

She playfully jabbed a finger into Kal’s chest.

“…they continue in you, too.”

Ikrie turned to Lani, squeezing her shoulder gently as the auburn-haired girl cleared her throat.

“Do we… decide what our songs sound like?”

The dark-haired woman paused for a moment before a smile began to tug at her lips.

“Yeah… yeah, you do,” she replied. “Every choice you make, every path you walk down, every friend you meet, every enemy you defeat, every challenge you overcome… these shape how your song sounds.”

“But… do you ever get to…  _ hear _ yours?” Lani pressed.

“If you wish to sing it,” Ikrie replied. “They don’t need words, necessarily, as long as the melody conveys the meaning.”

The auburn-haired girl smiled as Kal shifted his position slightly, clearing his throat.

“Do… do you know what yours or Mother’s sound like?”

Ikrie glanced toward Anukai, who only smirked back at her.

“I think I can hear how it would go,” the dark-haired woman replied. “You want me to show you, I take it?”

Both children nodded, prompting Ikrie to clear her throat and breathe deeply. As she began to sing, mostly utilizing open sounds to provide approximations of words, she could hear her own voice echoing off the mountainside nearby. At first, she began to feel a tight feeling building in her chest, almost prompting her to stop singing, until a different sound seemed to echo back to her.

It was much more crystalline, purer than a voice’s echo, cutting through the sounds of the wind against the rocky cliff faces nearby until it reached Ikrie’s ears. A moment later, she felt it wrap about her, but instead of a cold chill, like the wind had provided so far, it felt… comforting, warm.

Like she was singing correctly.

And so she continued.

When her voice finally faded, ending on an uplifting run, but stopping without a true resolution, both children looked to her curiously.

“Why did you stop there?” Kal asked.

“It was pretty,” Lani added. “I wanted you to keep going.”

“Well, that’s because our song isn’t done,” Ikrie replied, grinning, squeezing both of their shoulders gently. “We’re here now, and we’ve got a ways to go… besides… you two will carry it farther than either of us.”

“So… that’s part of our song, too?” Kal asked tentatively.

“I’d say so,” she nodded. “You two have been a very important part of ours, and songs intertwine all the time.”

“Some day,” Lani replied, drawing both women’s attentions, “I want to be able to carry it as well as you did, Mom.”

Ikrie smiled gently as she cupped Lani’s face in one hand.

“I’m sure you will… perhaps even better.”


	30. Teacher

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by NorthernGhost

A loud knocking penetrated the redhead’s sleep, her gold-green hazel eyes blinking open blearily for a few moments before the intrusive sound came, once again. With a sigh, she squeezed her eyes closed for a moment before dragging herself from the security of the Carja silk sheets that had wrapped themselves around her in the middle of the night. Staggering on her feet slightly, she made her way through the simple apartment until she came to the front door, pausing, for a moment, with her hand on the latch as she glanced down at herself. Satisfied that she was at least fully dressed from when she had fallen asleep the night before, she yanked the door open, leaning against it as she blinked at the bright sunlight.

Her gaze registered a figure shorter than her standing in the doorway, but they still seemed to be nothing more than a silhouette, even as she tried to focus on their image.

“It is early for… either of you.”

“Not that early,” the figure replied, their voice just barely on the edge of cracking between a higher and a lower pitch. “It’s Kal, because you didn’t seem to notice.”

Ashana grinned, nodding as she rubbed at her eyes tiredly.

“Of course, who else would surprise me with a visit, little Stormbird?”

“I’m not little.”

“You can still come in.”

With a heavy sigh, the dark-haired boy entered the apartment, the redhead yawning deeply as she pushed the door closed behind him.

“How are your mothers?” she asked.

“Fine. Probably going to ask you to visit if you don’t stop by this afternoon.”

“I did not realize they knew I was in Meridian, already,” Ashana shrugged.

Kal scoffed as he came to a stop in the center of the living space, turning to face her, once again.

“Everyone knows when you get to Meridian.”

“Everyone?” the redhead shot back, raising her eyebrows as she padded toward the dark-haired boy, folding her arms over her chest.

“Red hair is hard to hide, here.”

Ashana paused for a moment before letting out a soft “ah”, stepping closer to Kal and ruffling his hair.

“Did others think I was your mother?”

Kal slipped away from her touch as she smirked, the boy glaring up at her with a clenched jaw.

“You may look alike, but… no.”

“Good, good,” Ashana replied, making her way toward a well-worn, but plush, chair in the living space and falling into it with a sigh. “I would hate to have lost my individual image from her.”

Kal turned slowly in place, his hands clenching into fists at his sides as he stared at the ground a foot or two from him for a moment, the redhead’s eyes quickly picking out the small movements as she waited for him to speak, again.

“That’s not why I came here,” Kal suddenly said, turning to her fully and lifting his chin slightly as his pale eyes met hers.

Ashana’s eyebrows raised in question as she leaned forward in her seat.

“Then why?”

“Because…”

The dark-haired boy trailed off, his hands working tensely for a moment or two before his arms quickly lifted, folding over his chest as Ashana noted how his jaw continued to work tensely, although he now refused to look away from her gaze.

“Did someone try to attack you?”

“No, not… physically…” he said slowly.

The redhead’s brow furrowed even further in concern as she propped her elbows against her knees, clasping her hands before her.

“Did they insult you about your family?” she asked softly, but with a hard edge to her tone.

“Not… not that I can’t handle.”

“With what I have taught you?”

“I haven’t held a knife to the throat of another at my school or… broken an arm, no,” Kal sighed.

Ashana paused for a moment before swallowing heavily, absentmindedly brushing some of her fiery locks away from her face and tossing them over her shoulder before sliding forward another few inches in her chair.

“While these measures are extreme, it would show them—”

“It would send the Moms,  _ both _ of them, into a fit of rage, and…”

Kal let out a frustrated huff as he spun in place, beginning to pace about the living space. Ashana watched him for a few moments before sighing, shaking her head as the dark-haired boy glanced toward her with a hard expression.

“If you wanted advice on how to talk these others out of a confrontation, you would have sought your mother, Ikrie, or your grandmother, Aloy,” the redhead said, “but here you are. Why, then?”

“Because…”

The boy trailed off, his jaw working tensely as his hands clenched at his forearms, still leaving them crossed before him. Eventually, he took a deep breath, stopping his pacing as he closed his eyes for a moment before turning to Ashana.

“Because part of me wanted to hurt them,” he said softly.

The redhead frowned slightly.

“And?”

“And… I wanted to know why.”

“So… you came to me?” Ashana replied, confusion creasing her face.

“You gave me a hunter’s knife when I was eight years old,” Kal replied, “and… and have taught me how to use it and how to… fight back and defend myself and… and you’ve always pushed me to… to know my own strength and…”

“Those were all points I have tried to make, yes.”

“But why?”

The redhead recoiled slightly at the intensity in the boy’s tone.

“What do you mean?”

“Why did you do that?” he shot back. “Why have you… been the way you are with me… or Lana?”

Ashana stared back at the boy for several long moments before sighing and running her hand through her long, red locks, again, brushing some of them beside her left ear.

“I did not just do—what I have done—” she began, “to teach you aggression or—scare you. At least… I did not want to make you scared of me.”

Kal shifted uncomfortably, prompting Ashana to sigh, offering him the closest thing to a sympathetic expression as he had seen from her.

“I know, as well as your mothers and Ara know, that the world beyond this city is not always a kind one,” she continued, a distant, hard expression overtaking her eyes for a moment as her fingers brushed gently at the thin scar across her temple. “What I wanted you to know—to understand—was that feeling… of helplessness… of powerlessness… of… fear…”

She trailed off, noting how the dark-haired boy seemed tempted to back away from her.

“I wanted you to know these things, to protect yourself, and others,” she said softly. “You have taken to the thoughtful fields so well, but I did not want you to be helpless if you found yourself more firmly in the physical world.”

Kal paused for a moment, staring back at her before sighing heavily, hanging his head.

“I fought back.”

Ashana recoiled slightly, her eyebrows raising.

“At your school?”

The dark-haired boy nodded.

“What did they say?”

“They said… they said I was weak, that… that my mother had stolen our name and… she was a liar and a coward.”

Ashana’s jaw clenched tightly as something dark passed through her eyes for a moment before she inhaled deeply through her nose.

“You are not weak, and your mother is not a coward or a liar,” Ashana shot back, leaning forward and gesturing for Kal to come closer, which he obliged cautiously. “Your mother has a strong will and a readiness to defend those she loves, and your grandmother recognized this—that is why you and her carry your name, even though your mother was not born of your grandmother.”

Kal’s head hung for a moment as he scuffed his boot at the floor before him.

“She is one of the reasons I am alive, today,” the redhead continued, attempting to meet his gaze.

“I’ve heard.”

“And yet you treat it so casually,” Ashana shot back, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder as he came to a stop before her and finally meeting his pale eyes directly. “Saving another’s life is not something to be treated lightly.”

Kal shifted under her grip, prompting her to only raise her other hand, placing it on his opposite shoulder.

“Both of your mothers did a great deed for me,” Ashana continued, “and I will always be indebted to them for it.”

The redhead paused, noting how Kal’s head hung, again, her jaw working tensely before she took a deep breath.

“Saving a life, means much more than taking one.”

That seemed to prompt the boy to look up at her, finally.

“I want you to defend yourself, your family,” she continued, “as best you can. You and Lana both. What I have tried to teach you, what I have hoped to instill, was the feeling—the fear—deep within you, that you could lose something. For a child, such as yourself—”

Kal shot her a dirty look, prompting the redhead to smirk.

“—that means making you aware of yourself. I have done the same for Elias.”

The dark-haired boy sighed, nodding begrudgingly, but it only prompted Ashana to slide from her seat, kneeling on the floor before him.

“If someone pulled a knife on either of your mothers at the market, tonight, and you were there, what would you do?”

“Pull my own.”

“If they cut you, swung theirs at you with the strength of an adult, what then?”

“I would stand my ground.”

“If they did the same to Lana?”

“I would do the same.”

Ashana nodded, grinning.

“Then you have learned what I have tried to teach you,” she said. “So, why did you come to see me, today?”

The dark-haired boy shuffled uncomfortably as the redhead grinned.

“Saying you missed me is perfectly fine.”

A moment later, Kal had stepped forward, wrapping her in an embrace that Ashana returned, the corners of her lips pulling back even more.

“ _ How much do you remember? _ ” she asked, her tongue settling comfortably into its native tones.

“ _ A little _ ,” Kal replied, his accent stilted but his words correct.

“ _ You should practice more _ .”

The dark-haired boy released her from the embrace, staring back at her with a determined expression as he tried to decipher what she had said, prompting the redhead to smirk, once again.

“You should practice more,” she repeated.

“No one else knows it,” Kal sighed.

“Well… maybe I should talk to Talanah,” the redhead scoffed. “I can leave you some lessons for when I am not here, as she has provided for Elias so that he may learn your language. Just as you wish to know mine, he wishes to know yours… then we can all speak equally.”

The dark-haired boy’s eyes lit up for a moment and the redhead grinned.

“ _ I… wish… to learn… more. _ ”

Ashana’s grin broadened as she nodded.

“ _ I will teach you. _ ”

Kal stared back at her with confusion as she leaned forward, ruffling his dark hair with a smirk.

“I will teach you, little Stormbird.”

While the midday sun brought with it heat that hinted at summer’s impending arrival, the chill of the night clung to the ground, still, even hours after the sun had risen. With a groan, the middle-aged redhead twisted her back, pressing the heels of her hands into the small of it for a moment before taking a seat on a large rock that had at one time come crashing down from the nearby mountainous slope, settling firmly in the ground. The teenage boy beside her glanced over with a smirk before holding out one hand.

“ _ What is this _ ?” Ashana asked, glancing down at the small, dark orbs in his hand.

“ _ Blueberries _ ,” he replied. “ _ Do you not have them out east _ ?”

The redhead smirked, taking the offered fruit and popping one in her mouth.

“ _ Just testing your knowledge of the word, Kallik. _ ”

The boy laughed, shaking his head as he finished the last berry in his other hand, wiping them together before him.

“ _ Have I not proven my knowledge of your words, yet? _ ”

“ _ You have, _ ” Ashana nodded, biting into two of the remaining berries at once. “ _ You are still eager to prove things to me, though, so I wanted to provide the chance. _ ”

Kal paused for a moment, his brow furrowing, before he cleared his throat, glancing over at her.

“ _ What do you mean? _ ”

The redhead grinned, finishing the last of her fruit before nudging his arm with her elbow.

“ _ Let us not waste the whole morning, _ ” she said before rising to her feet and turning back to their small camp behind them.

She set about gathering her equipment, including her weapons, and securing them to her person, ensuring that she had not left any ammunition or small details that could cause trouble later, without them. As she was finishing her checks, she noted that Kal was completing his, but something about his motions seemed almost machine-like, as if he were just following a pre-programmed pattern. Ashana weighed her words for a moment, but ultimately bit them back for the time being, instead catching the teenage boy’s eyes as he glanced to her and nodding farther down the slope.

“ _ Shall we begin? _ ”

The pair made their way into the more densely-forested ground at the base of the slope, each of them tapping their Focuses once it began to level out.

“You have reached the edge of the reserve,” GAIA’s voice chimed in their ears. “Do you wish for me to update the machines’ programming to provide more of a challenging experience?”

The duo exchanged glances as Ashana grinned.

“Let us start easier, to stretch into the day,” she replied.

“Affirmative, the machines will defend themselves, but will not pursue with aggression beyond their groups or their ground,” the AI woman replied.

“Thanks, GAIA,” Kal added before they tapped their Focuses, once again.

“ _ Are you disappointed? _ ” the redhead asked, raising her eyebrows.

“ _ No, not disappointed, _ ” he replied.

Ashana continued to stare back at him with a slight smirk for a moment before nodding farther into the valley ahead of them.

“ _ Come. _ ”

With that, the pair turned and continued farther into the open landscape, the trees giving way to open grasslands, punctuated by small streams, large rocks half-buried in the ground, and patches of even taller, wild, red grass. As they made their way toward the nearest stream, the sounds of mechanical bleating came from up ahead and they both dropped low, into offensive stances as they scurried forward until they came to a stop against one of the large rocks. Leaning around the side, Kal caught sight of a small pack of Grazers, two Watchers forming a circular perimeter about them with their patrols.

The boy turned back to Ashana, holding up three fingers and shaking them slightly before holding up two and making a circular motion. The redhead nodded, drawing the black, metal weapon from her belt. Its length was somewhere between a large pistol and a rifle, but the barrel was not as wide as the short scatterguns Kal had been shown, previously. The redhead caught his eyes locked onto the weapon and smirked, snapping her fingers softly between them and prompting him to startle, his gaze lifting to meet hers.

“ _ Later _ ,” she mouthed, taking care not to actually utter a sound.

He nodded, taking a deep breath before drawing a sling from his own belt, holding a small orb that glowed a faint blue in his other hand. The pair exchanged one last glance before nodding, Kal turning and slipping into a patch of the tall grass a few yards ahead of them, along the bank of the stream. Ashana raised her weapon at the ready, moving alongside the boulder until she was able to lean one side against it to steady her position, both hands raising to hold the gun at the ready.

The redhead eyed the small herd of Grazers carefully, watching for any signs that they had noticed their approach, but the machines, along with their Watchers on patrol, seemed to pay them no mind. A moment later, she heard a rustling from her right, only to see a streak of blue light sail through the air, arcing toward the machines and crashing into the ground between them. Immediately, a bright flash of electricity burst from the point of impact, stunning the machines and making one of them fall on its side. The others attempted to turn to run, but their legs seemed to not fully cooperate, moving in short, jerky motions.

Seizing the moment, Ashana took aim at one of them and squeezed the trigger of her weapon. A loud bang split the air as the gun recoiled into her arm and shoulder, but the redhead managed to hold it relatively still, despite the kick, and watched as the front part of one of the Grazers’ head blew apart in a shower of sparks and metal pieces. The machine fell to the ground, its limbs finally fully giving out on it, while the other one still left standing attempted even more adamantly to get away. A moment later, however, something suddenly lodged itself in the back, right knee of the machine, only for a loud blast to blow it apart a few moments later.

As the machine collapsed, Ashana spared a glance toward Kal, finding him drawing another arrow to a bow seemingly made almost entirely from machine parts and complete with small flares of color from pieces of ribbon and what seemed to be feathers. A smirk tugged at the redhead’s lips as she turned back to the machines ahead of them, finding the remaining Grazer that had fallen in the initial blast was now struggling to get to its feet, but the two Watchers that had previously circled the group were now charging straight through them, their eyes red as each one seemed to lock on to one of the hunters.

Ashana aimed her weapon and squeezed the trigger quickly, but the projectile seemed to glance off the side of the machine’s eye, causing it to stagger, but not fall. Cursing under her breath, she readied the gun and took aim again, this time taking an extra second to hone in on her target and squeeze the trigger.

This time, her aim fell true and the Watcher tumbled forward onto the ground with a heavy, metallic thud. When Ashana glanced toward the other, she found it was already down, and Kal was glancing toward her with a smirk. With a sigh, the redhead rose from her hiding spot and began to move toward the small stream, taking care to hop to rocks that stood above the water, or at least very close to its surface, to make her way across.

Once on the other side, she made her way toward the downed, but still mostly functional, Grazer, standing a few yards away and raising her gun. With a single blast to the head, the machine lay still, as well. Sighing, Ashana turned back to see Kallik finishing off the remaining, downed Grazer with a similarly point-blank arrow to its head.

With an audible sigh, he glanced around the scene for a moment before turning to the redhead, smirking.

“ _ I saw you missed, once. _ ”

“ _ It happens, on occasion, _ ” she replied. “ _ The end result was still the same, and no one was injured, therefore it is still a victory, however. _ ”

Kal’s grin faltered slightly as Ashana smirked.

“ _ You did well, Kallik, _ ” she continued. “ _ I see that you have used your mothers’ favored weapons. _ ”

The boy’s grin returned in full effect as he turned the bow slightly in his hands.

“ _ I thought it would be more fun. _ ”

“ _ You thought it would prove not as easy as a gun, no? _ ”

Kal’s brow furrowed in confusion as Ashana sighed, shaking her head.

“ _ Shall we collect our prizes and continue onward? _ ”

Gathering some of the blaze from the grazers and other vital components that they could easily carry, they set out farther into the valley. The next encounter proved to be another herd of rather docile Scrappers, of which several had notably injured legs and only one was actually able to use its laser function, leaving them easy targets for the duo.

As the last fell, Kal glanced around at their work and sighed.

“ _ Now you seem disappointed, _ ” Ashana commented, approaching the teenager.

“ _ Not disappointed, just… _ ”

“ _ We can hunt larger game, now, if you wish, _ ” she continued before he could answer.

“ _ If… if you want to… _ ”

“ _ It is why you wanted us to come today, was it not _ ?” the redhead shot back, raising her eyebrows. “ _ GAIA’s records state that a Thunderjaw lives here, currently. _ ”

Kal’s jaw worked slowly as his lips scrunched to one side, his expression trying to hide another, but Ashana noted that he had learned from her red-haired counterpart how to hide his true emotions, well.

“GAIA?” she said, tapping her Focus.

“Yes, Ashana?”

“Where is this Thunderjaw that lives in the valley?”

“It is due east of your current location. I have intentionally kept its patterns away from the half you are currently in. Shall I remove these restrictions?” the AI woman asked.

“Yes, and… update its programming for a challenge, as you stated before.”

A moment’s pause followed as Kal raised his eyebrows at her.

“Confirmed, the Thunderjaw’s range has now been set to the entire valley, and its programming has been set to a heightened state of alertness. I will continue to monitor in the case that the probability of death has become too high.”

Ashana smirked deeply as her fingers hovered over her Focus.

“Thank you, GAIA.”

“You’re welcome, and I bid you a safe and successful hunt.”

With that, she tapped the device, closing the communication and letting her arm fall to her side.

“ _ So, the true hunt of the day begins, _ ” Ashana said.

Kal inhaled slowly through his nose and nodded, his pale eyes refusing to break from hers. With a firm nod, the redhead began to lead him in stripping what they thought they would need from the Scrappers before heading east, as GAIA had described. They had only been walking for ten minutes or so before the sound of heavy footfalls began to echo off the nearby mountain slopes and the ground notably shook underfoot.

The duo quickly sought cover behind another of the large boulders scattered throughout the valley, coming to a stop with their backs against the cold rock. Kal tapped his Focus and craned his head to his left, scanning through the rock, itself, for a few moments before turning back to his red-haired aunt beside him.

“ _ It is close. _ ”

She nodded, but didn’t draw her gun, instead reaching for something small and round from a pouch on her belt. Kal glanced down at it, curiosity creasing his face for a moment before the sounds of the massive machine seemed to draw alongside the opposite side of the boulder. The teenager whirled toward it, drawing his bow and nocking an arrow to it as he glanced back in the direction of the sounds from behind him.

Ashana took the moment to slip backward along the boulder, moving around the far side and readying the device in her hand. As she rounded the surface, their target came into view. The Thunderjaw showed notable signs of damage along its side, with what looked like jagged burn marks in its metal frame, and a piece of its tail missing. Upon closer inspection, the redhead noted that it looked as if perhaps it had been struck by lightning, thus explaining how it occasionally seemed to shake and jerk, as if some part of its internal system was faulty.

Taking a deep breath, she slid forward along the outer edge of the rock until she was nearly at its edge, although she was still obscured from the machine’s sight by a large group of bushes. She waited to see if it had detected her approach, but the machine still seemed to be patrolling, as normal, without indications that it had detected potential attackers. Rising from her cover, Ashana drew her arm back before hurling the device with all of her strength toward the Thunderjaw. The small device sailed through the air before landing on the bottom edge of the machine’s main body, immediately sticking in place to the metal paneling.

As the device landed, the machine suddenly stopped its patrolling, beginning to swing its head about, as if searching for something. Ashana quickly ducked back into cover, remaining in the bushes for several long moments as the sounds of the heavy footfalls drew closer and closer. When it was finally only a few yards away, she glanced up to see the massive machine’s head almost directly above her, but it still had not turned toward her; instead, it continued to sweep the wooded ground behind her.

The redhead held her breath for several long moments until the Thunderjaw finally began to turn away, continuing farther into the open ground of the valley, once again. Exhaling carefully, she slid from the bushes and hurried back along the boulder, rounding it only to find that Kal no longer remained where she had left him moments ago.

Dropping to a crouch and glancing around wildly, she quickly realized that she had no idea where he could have gone. Frowning, she attempted to open her Focus, but the interface seemed to jump and distort about her, prompting her to curse under her breath.

The jammer she had placed on the Thunderjaw to block its scanning abilities was also strong enough to disrupt her own.

“ _ No matter… _ ” she muttered, “ _ I have hunted without this capability before. _ ”

As she drew her gun, checking to see how many shots remained in its cartridge, the thought that Kal hadn’t completed many hunts without the benefit of a Focus or the ability to use gear such as it crossed Ashana’s mind and she paused, her jaw clenching tightly. Before the tight feeling in her chest could build further, the sound of a loud boom echoed about the valley, followed quickly by the sound of the Thunderjaw’s mechanical roar.

The redhead quickly rushed forward, remaining beside the boulder as she raised her gun, aiming it toward the hulking shape of the machine. Smoke rose from the far side of its body as the Thunderjaw whirled toward where the projectile had to have come from, its motion also drawing Ashana’s attention, her eyes scanning the open ground before it.

Her eyes locked onto the hints of motion amidst some of the tall grass, the small point of dark coloring giving away Kal’s position amidst the otherwise red-tipped fauna. The machine appeared to have not located him, yet, but it was drawing dangerously close to his position. Taking a deep breath, Ashana aimed her weapon, firing a round into the metal plating on the Thunderjaw’s haunches. The projectile ricocheted harmlessly off it, but it did prompt the machine to change its course, its feet no longer in danger of trampling Kal.

As the machine’s eyes locked on Ashana, they quickly turned a burning red and it let out a ground-shaking roar in her direction. A moment later, one of the two cannons on the sides of its head began to power on, the blue light at the tip growing brighter and brighter, and the redhead quickly broke into a sprint to her right. The rounds of energy slammed into the grassy surface behind her, but it seemed to run out of energy to fire just before they reached her, as she felt some of the dirt kicked up by the impacts fall on her back, but she was not blown off her feet or struck down by one of the bolts.

Ashana slowed to a stop, whirling to face the machine, again, as she raised her gun, aiming directly for one of its eyes. Her shot landed, sending sparks cascading from its head, but it did not fell or slow the Thunderjaw. As the redhead prepared to fire her weapon, again, a fiery, red streak shot through the air toward the machine’s side, seemingly disappearing into its side before an explosion and a plume of fire burst from the metal casing. The Thunderjaw roared in pain as it staggered to one side, nearly falling to the ground entirely, but managing to catch itself at the last moment.

Ashana’s eyes flicked toward the patch of grass she had watched earlier, now finding Kal standing fully in it, the red tips just reaching his waist. The boy drew another bomb in his sling before loosing it, as well, although the second projectile didn’t seem to draw as much damage as the first.

Turning her attention back to the Thunderjaw, Ashana aimed her gun toward the cannon on the side of its head and fired a shot directly between it and the machine’s actual head. A shower of sparks fell from the contact point, and she noted how the cannon seemed to hang looser. When it tried to aim toward her, the tip flickered blue for a moment, but seemed unable to truly build a charge, as her shot had severed enough wires to cut it off.

“ _ You cannot hit me from afar, now, _ ” she huffed, checking the cartridge of her weapon and quickly placing it in the pouch at her belt as she grabbed for a full one.

By the time she had jammed the new ammunition in place, the Thunderjaw had begun to turn back toward Kal, who had attempted to launch another shock bomb toward it, but the electricity seemed to do little to actually deter the massive machine.

“ _ It cannot be stunned that way, child, _ ” Ashana muttered. “ _ You know this, you know this… _ ”

A moment later, the redhead aimed her weapon, once again, firing another round into the side of the machine’s head, prompting it to turn toward her, only for her to place a second round in its remaining eye. Now that both red lights were extinguished, the machine swung its body wildly, seemingly unable to see and with the jammer attached to it, unable to use its other sensors.

It was truly blind.

Like a blind animal, however, it began to strike out wildly.

Ashana’s eyes widened as she saw the large disc launcher on its right haunch begin to blast rounds into the air, the round, flat objects flying over the open ground while shooting beams of pure energy downward, scorching the Earth beneath them.

“Kallik!” the redhead screamed, whirling toward him to find the dark-haired boy sprinting away from the oncoming barrage as quickly as he could.

At the sound of her voice echoing across the open ground, the Thunderjaw instead turned toward Ashana, however, and lowered its head, preparing for a charge. Growling, the redhead fired another round toward its head before dashing to her right, diving forward at the last second and tucking her head and shoulders into a roll just as the massive machine blew past her.

Popping to a kneeling position, she whirled toward the Thunderjaw, raising her weapon as her eyes locked on to the glowing, orange opening on its side. One of the missing panels had revealed the heart of the massive machine, and by the traces of smoke that still curled from it, she knew Kal had taken aim for it, before. Aiming her gun, she managed to fire two rounds into the exposed section, sending sparks flying into the air as the Thunderjaw shook and shuddered on its feet, its motions becoming feebler and less controlled.

As it turned toward her, however, she took aim for the center of its jaws, only for her gun to let out a resounding click as she squeezed the trigger. Ashana quickly ripped the cartridge out of it, only to find three more rounds inside. Her eyes widened further as she realized that it had jammed internally, and in the midst of the fight, she was not going to have the time to safely remove the casing without accidentally losing a finger.

Cursing loudly, she dropped the cartridge in the pouch on her belt and jammed the gun back into its holster as she broke off to her left, dodging another charge from the Thunderjaw just in time. This time, as she broke out of her roll, she leapt to her feet and continued sprinting across the open ground, scanning for Kal ahead of her. She finally spotted motion from a dark shape by one of the boulders ahead of her, and she turned toward it.

The sounds of the massive machine roaring behind her shook her to her bones, but she didn’t dare look back, instead keeping her eyes focused on the boy ahead of her. A few moments later, she skidded to a halt beside him, partially slamming into the rock to stop herself.

“Bow!” she demanded, holding one hand toward him.

The dark-haired teenager glanced at her in surprise, but quickly ripped the weapon from over his shoulders and tossed it to her.

“Blast arrow!”

He drew one from his quiver and handed it over, as well. With a deep breath, the redhead whirled around toward the Thunderjaw to find it beginning its charge toward them.

“Sling!  _ Aim for the head! _ ”

Drawing the bow back, Ashana aimed the arrowhead directly at the center of the charging machine’s face. At the last moment, she adjusted the aim upward to compensate for the arc of her shot, and loosed the arrow. She watched the tip land on target, the bright light from the device attached to it beginning to grow until the loud boom split the air, ripping off chunks of the armored plating and revealing the inner workings and skeleton of the Thunderjaw beneath.

A moment later, another fiery streak sailed over her head, arcing toward the staggering machine. Despite the change in its trajectory, the explosive landed true in the center of the exposed machinery. With a bleating call, the Thunderjaw suddenly pitched forward, slamming into the ground and sliding forward several yards before coming to a stop.

The duo remained still for several long moments as the massive machine continued to squirm and attempt to get to its feet, but the efforts ultimately seemed fruitless as it remained on the ground. Drawing a deep breath, Ashana turned to her nephew, nodding toward the downed Thunderjaw.

“ _ Finish it. _ ”

He nodded, drawing one last bomb from his belt and taking aim at the mangled and smoking head of the Thunderjaw. As his previous shot had, the projectile sailed true and landed squarely in the most exposed section of their prey. As the billow of flames and smoke rose into the air, the massive machine finally lay still, the last convulsions and twitches of its body finally falling still.

Several long moments of stillness and silence passed before Ashana let out a heavy sigh, leaning her back against the boulder behind her and glancing toward Kal. The dark-haired teenager was still staring at their downed prey, but a grin was slowly tugging at his lips.

“ _ It shoots well, _ ” the redhead said, drawing a confused look from the boy.

With a smirk, she held the bow toward him, and he let out a soft “ah”, taking the weapon and swinging it over his shoulders, once again.

“ _ Mom and Bekan helped me with it _ ,” he said.

Ashana simply nodded, wiping at her brow with the back of one hand as she arched her back, groaning softly.

“ _ You did well, Kallik. _ ”

When she straightened up, once again, and glanced over, she found that the boy’s grin had grown broader.

“ _ You think so _ ?”

Ashana smirked, gripping one of his shoulders firmly.

“ _ You have had good teachers. _ ”

Kal laughed, shoving his sling back into the holster on his belt before glancing toward the Thunderjaw.

“ _ Is there anything we should take from it? _ ”

“ _ It would be a waste not to use something from your catch. _ ”

The teenager nodded and began to lead the way toward the felled machine. Once in close, Ashana let him search out some of the most useful components before he returned to her, holding out a section of faintly glowing cording.

“ _ What is this? _ ” she asked, taking them from him with a curious expression.

“Luminous Braiding,” he replied. “ _ It can be used for trading, or for crafting decoration. It is commonly taken as a trophy _ .”

Ashana nodded, before glancing up at him, attempting to hold them back.

“ _ This should be yours, then. _ ”

“ _ I did not fell it on my own, _ ” Kal replied, raising his eyebrows in an expression so like one the redhead had seen his mother make many times that a shiver ran down her spine. “ _ You deserve this, as well. _ ”

“ _ I have my share of trophies from many hunts, _ ” Ashana shot back. “ _ You do not. This is yours. _ ”

Kal paused for a moment before ultimately nodding and accepting the Braiding back, tucking it with the rest of his spoils.

“ _ Shall we return to camp? _ ” the redhead asked, stretching her arms over her head. “ _ I feel we have done well for today. _ ”

“ _ For all of today? _ ”

Ashana smirked, lowering her arms but clapping the teenager on the back of his shoulder.

“ _ Such eagerness, Kallik. _ ”

With that, she began to lead the way back through the valley to their small camp. The walk passed in silence, although several times she thought she saw Kal move to speak, but ultimately think better of it. When they had fallen atop their bedrolls, once again, the redhead let out a heavy sigh, rolling her neck and shoulders for a few moments before removing her weapons and equipment, placing them to one side before drawing her gun and her hunting knife, burying the tip in the dirt before her before setting about in an attempt to remove the jam from its firing mechanism.

“ _ It is only just past noon, _ ” Kal commented, glancing up toward the sky overhead. “ _ Do you feel we have had a good hunt, already? _ ”

The redhead paused her actions, glancing up at him.

“ _ I was not disappointed by today’s hunt, _ ” she replied.

The teenager looked as if he wanted to say something else, but ultimately fell silent, beginning to gather the resources he had stripped earlier and organize them on the ground before him. After several long moments of silence, Ashana muttered something under her breath, prompting Kal to glance up just as a loud metallic ping sounded from her gun and a small piece of metal flew to her right.

“ _ There we are, _ ” she sighed, placing her knife back in its sheath and turning the gun over in her hands a few times. “ _ It is still not an entirely perfect design. _ ”

“ _ Is it yours? _ ”

“ _ My weapon? _ ”

“ _ Your design. _ ”

Ashana let out an “ah”, nodding as she glanced down at the metal shape in her lap for a moment or two before holding it toward the teenage boy.

“ _ It is. Would you like to examine it? _ ”

Kal quickly stopped his counting and took the weapon, turning it over several times in his hands as he ran his fingers over certain sections, prodded at others, and ultimately held it in a firing position, aimed off to the side of their camp, even though it was not currently loaded.

“ _ It is light, _ ” he commented. “ _ More than I expected. _ ”

“ _ By design, _ ” Ashana replied, smirking. “ _ You are impressed? _ ”

“ _ Of course, _ ” Kal said, nodding, as he handed the weapon back to her. “ _ I… still feel there is much I wish to learn from you. _ ”

“ _ You have learned much, already, _ ” she shot back, raising her eyebrows, “ _ and I see that you have learned from others, as well. _ ”

“ _ What do you mean? _ ” he asked, brow furrowing in confusion.

“ _ You are careful with your words, but genuine, _ ” Ashana continued, “ _ a trait I greatly admire of your mother, Ikrie. _ ”

“ _ You… do? _ ”

The redhead nodded, placing her gun back atop her equipment before turning back to Kal and letting her hands fall loosely in her lap.

“ _ You are capable of keeping much guarded, like your  _ Mom _ , as you say, _ ” she continued, smirking, “ _ but you show a deep compassion and care for your family and friends. _ ”

Kal squirmed slightly in his seat as she noted the hint of an uncomfortable frown tugging at the corner of his lips.

“ _ I also sense that you do not ask the others to join you on a hunt, regularly, _ ” Ashana said, raising her eyebrows slightly.

“ _ What do you mean? _ ” the boy replied slowly.

“ _ I have seen you with your sister and mothers… I understand. _ ”

“ _ I am not weak, _ ” Kal shot back perhaps a little too quickly, prompting him to clench his jaw for a moment, his hands notably curling into fists atop his knees before he exhaled slowly, laying his palms flat, again. “ _ I am not foregoing my training. _ ”

Ashana sighed heavily, rising to her hands and knees to clamber across the camp and take a seat beside Kal on his bedroll, pulling her knees in toward her chest and wrapping her arms around them.

“ _ Kallik, that is not what I meant, _ ” she began, turning to look at him even as he seemed conflicting on actually meeting her gaze. “ _ You are not weak for how you feel toward them, and act around them. It is perfectly fine to have both sides to you. _ ”

Ashana hesitated for a moment before uncurling one arm from before her to reach behind the teenager’s back, placing her hand on his opposite shoulder and squeezing it firmly.

“ _ A warrior with no heart fights for nothing. _ ”

Kal blinked in response, finally turning his head to meet her gaze directly as she held it for several long moments.

“ _ You have a reason to fight, _ ” she continued slowly, but firmly, “ _ and it is highly admirable. _ ”

The dark-haired boy swallowed heavily, nodding in response, which only prompted Ashana to sigh, her hand hanging a little heavier on his shoulder.

“ _ When your mothers found me, _ ” she continued, “ _ one of my only concerns was to return to Sorin. Over the years, I have found those who motivate me. Elias and him are most definitely important, but so are you, your sister, your mothers, your grandmothers, Ara… all of you I feel great—care for, and it makes me fight harder. _ ”

Ashana leaned her head forward slightly, shaking Kal’s shoulder gently.

“ _ Loving another is not weakness. _ ”

The boy bit on his lower lip for a moment before he finally nodded, clearing his throat as he turned to stare down at one of his hands playing with the fabric of his pants.

“ _ And I hope you know _ ,” she continued softly, pausing for a moment as she swallowed and took a deep breath, “ _ I love all of the parts of you, my little Stormbird… not just the strength you display when we hunt. _ ”

Kal seemed to recoil slightly for a moment before his head whirled toward his aunt, his eyes somewhat widened. They both remained silent, but Ashana began to smile, squeezing at his shoulder. A moment later, however, the boy suddenly leaned in toward her, wrapping the redhead in a tight embrace, which she quickly returned. She could feel the strength in his grip as she attempted to match it, the two of them remaining still and silent for several long moments.

Finally, they began to pull apart, and as soon as his hands were free, Kal began to wipe at his eyes, clearing his throat. Ashana grinned, patting his shoulder, one more time as his pale eyes met her gold-green.

“ _ I believe there are things you can still teach me, too, little Stormbird. _ ”

Kal laughed softly, still wiping at his right eye as he did.

“ _ I am not little, anymore. _ ”

Ashana’s grin broadened as she also began to laugh, nodding.

“ _ Perhaps you are correct, now, but you are still my Stormbird. _ ”


	31. Safe and Sound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by imagine0314

* * *

“But Mom!”

“I said no, Lana.”

Anukai pinched the bridge of her nose with her right hand before leaning back against the wood countertop in their kitchen. The afternoon sun shined brightly through the nearby window, warm, orange hues spilling in that only seemed to highlight the tension building between the older woman and her daughter.  
  
“But my friends want to go!” the girl insisted.  
  
The redhead sighed. “It’s not safe, you _know_ that.”  
  
Lana crossed her arms defiantly over her chest, her pale skin contrasting with her deep blue tunic. “That place has been a ruin since before I was born. It’s nothing special. It’s _fine._ ”  
  
“If there’s nothing special about it, why do you want to go so badly?” Anukai retorted, her palms now resting on the counter behind her.  
  
Lana sighed heavily. “You know the stories about Sunfall. Everyone was talking about it at school and...well, Javeer said we should all go and see if we could camp there for the night. Prove we’re not too scared.”  
  
“So it’s some stupid dare.”  
  
“It’s not...well...I mean--they’ll think I’m a coward and backed out!”  
  
“No way, kiddo. Not happening.”  
  
“They’re just _stories_ , Mom!”  
  
“And do you know how those stories got started?” the older redhead asked. “Because there’s truth to them! Bandits hide out in those ruins all the time--they have been since Grandma was _my_ age. We get the reports at the palace. I _know_ you’re capable, Lana, but you and your friends aren’t going as a hunting party. You’re going as _kids_ , and brazen kids who take dangerous risks get hurt or killed.”  
  
“Mom--!”  
  
“--I should know,” Anukai added softly, “I was one of them.” She flexed her left arm with a grimace, the light from the window glinting off the metal. 

The girl’s face contorted into anger, her cheeks flushing red and her volume increasing. “By the Sun, could you get over it already? Every time I want to do something _fun_ you harp about your _stupid_ arm!”

The redhead’s mouth parted slightly, hanging open for a moment as her daughter’s words pierced deep into her chest, the hurt only just starting to register before frustration and anger set in.

The girl spun on her heel stomping away angrily while her mother followed from the kitchen into the main room.  
  
“Where do you think you’re going?” Anukai asked, heat bubbling in her ribs.  
  
“Out,” the girl said flatly, pulling on her boots from near the door.  
  
“Oh no you don’t. Go to your room, Lana. You’re grounded,” the older woman commanded, her jaw tense. She worked desperately to avoid the burning sensation of tears forming at the rims of her eyes. 

“Try and stop me,” Lana said, her gray-hazel eyes boring into her mother’s form before she quickly turned and yanked open the front door, slamming it behind her hard enough to cause several items hanging on the wall to shake.  
  
Anukai let out the breath she’d been holding, raking her fingertips through her hair and catching sight of several grays that caused her to frown. She moved to sit on the couch, her head in her hands as the tension left, causing her body to go limp.  
  
“Went that badly, huh?” came the familiar tones of her wife from down the hall.  
  
Ikrie softly padded forward, coming to sit at Anukai’s side, her arm wrapping around the redhead’s shoulders. “Did she leave?”  
  
“You heard the door…”  
  
The dark-haired woman sighed. “I just wish she felt like she could come to me instead of stomping off.”  
  
Anukai lifted her head from her hands, trying to inconspicuously wipe at her eyes. “My fault she inherited my temper, I guess. But she wouldn’t have come to you this time, regardless.”  
  
“Why’s that?” Ikrie asked, slowly rubbing her hand across her wife’s back.  
  
“She...she told me to get _over_ my arm. Like it was nothing.”  
  
Ikrie frowned, her eyebrows drawing together. “...You know she didn’t mean it.”  
  
“I don’t know Ikrie, I really don’t,” the redhead responded, her voice cracking at the end. She swallowed hard before continuing. “Either way, she knew she wouldn’t get any sympathy from you regarding it.”  
  
Ikrie’s motions hadn’t slowed, her palm making a continuous circle around the muscle of Anukai’s shoulders and back. The two stayed like that for several minutes before Ikrie finally spoke.  
  
“Sometimes I can’t believe her. Were we ever like this at her age?”  
  
“The Cut didn’t allow for it,” Anukai admitted. “If we had been, we’d be dead.”  
  
Ikrie nodded solemnly. She knew it was true. Living in Meridian was so much simpler. _Safer._ It was why they’d built their lives here. It was why they’d raised their _children_ here.  
  
“Do you think we should go after her?”  
  
“No. You know where she’s off to, anyway,” Anukai said quietly, trying to speak around the lump forming in her throat. “If she won’t listen to me, maybe she’ll listen to Ara.”  
  
\------

Lana walked through the streets aimlessly, kicking at the dirt and cobblestones petulantly as she passed. She tried to pretend she didn’t have a destination in mind, but she knew deep down where she’d end up going. It was the same as always. Aunt Ara understood her like no one else, and surely she’d understand now.  
  
After an hour of wandering, the girl found herself standing before the familiar door, her knuckles rapping on the wood before she could even think about it.  
  
The entrance cracked open after a few moments, a figure bearing her mother’s features but with a wildly different hairstyle and clothing greeted her. Ara wore a deep maroon sleeveless top with black leggings, her bone pendant sitting heavily in the center of her chest. Upon seeing the girl, a smile spread across her aunt’s face.  
  
“Hey there, Little Red. Wasn’t expecting you.”

“Hey Aunt Ara,” Lana began hesitantly, looking away. “Um...can I come in?”  
  
“Of course,” the older woman said, urging her in. “You want something to drink? I’ve got some of that spiced tea you like.”  
  
The girl nodded, kicking off her boots in the entryway before closing the door behind her.  
  
“Is Vansa here?” Lana asked.  
  
“At the shop,” Ara called from the distance. “Had a patient with an emergency. She’ll be back in a few hours.”  
  
Ara and Vansa’s apartment was smaller than her own home but with a strange mix of Vansa’s various metalworking projects and herbs along with Ara’s more minimalistic style of decor. Over the years, it seemed, Vansa had transformed the space from Ara’s more spartan preferences to something that felt lived-in and welcoming. Warm, even.  
  
By the time Lana had fully walked in, she found Ara standing in their herb-laden kitchen with the kettle, pouring her a cup.  
  
“You’re in luck,” Ara said, “I was already boiling some water when you knocked.”  
  
The older woman handed the cup over before directing Lana to the living room, the two taking comfortable seats next to each other on the couch. Ara took an appreciative sip of her own tea before setting it down on the table before them, turning in her seat to look at her niece.  
  
“What’s wrong, Little Red? You’re being unusually quiet. And I know you well enough to know you and quiet don’t go hand in hand.”  
  
The girl took a deep breath, anger beginning to surface once again as she recalled the argument with her mother.  
  
“Mom and I got in a fight,” Lana said, taking a sip of her own tea and rotating the cup in her hands.  
  
“Yeah? About what?”  
  
“My friends and I wanted to go camping near the Sunfall ruins to prove we weren’t scared. It’s just some stupid camping trip and she won’t let me go,” Lana replied, her frustration building as she recited the events from earlier that afternoon. “She said it was too _dangerous_ like I’m some little kid. She’s just being a bitch about it and ruining my life. I hate her.”  
  
Ara tensed at the word and looked at the girl. “So what did you do when she said no?”  
  
“I _tried_ to tell her it was no big deal. I’d be there with my friends and the stories about that place are just _rumors_ but she swears up and down it’s not safe and then she had to go and make it about ‘kids taking risks’ and her stupid arm again. She needs to let it go, Aunt Ara. It’s been like, twenty-five years already, and anytime I want to do something fun she brings it up.”

The older woman noticeably stiffened while Lana continued to rant and recall the details of their argument. Several minutes passed while Ara listened intently, only interjecting here and there to ask the occasional question while she continued to drink her tea. Ara spun the ring on her finger--the one that matched Vansa’s--as the girl talked, patiently considering what her niece had to say.  
  
When the teenager had finally settled, her body appearing to run out of fury and steam, Ara slowly leaned forward.  
  
“She’s right, you know.”  
  
Lana’s eyes went wide. “What?”  
  
“Sorry kiddo, but your mom made the right choice.”  
  
“But Aunt Ara--you’re supposed to understand!”  
  
Ara nodded, an errant silver strand falling from her usual topknot.  
  
“I do understand, Lana, and I know that I’d have killed to have a mom who gave a shit about me at your age.”  
  
The girl paused, a wave of grief and hurt crashing into her. She’d always been particularly skilled at knowing what her aunt was feeling and today was no exception. 

“Look, Aunt Ara, I--”  
  
“No, Lana, this is the part where you _take me seriously_ for once, okay?” Ara began, her face taking on a deadly focus that was at odds with her customary flippant attitude. “I spent my whole childhood being passed around, shuffled from group to group, or scraping by on the streets. Not a single person gave a _fuck_ about me until I found Vansa and her father. And I can’t _imagine_ thinking that someone who _did_ care as much as your mom does was ‘ruining my life’. Do you know what I would have given to be in your position? To have someone willing to keep me _safe?_ ”  
  
Lana felt the wash of sadness seeping into her bones and she was certain her aunt was letting her bear the full brunt of it to prove her point.  
  
“I-I _know_ she cares,” Lana admitted with a frown. “That’s not the problem. She’s just...too overprotective. Every time she’s _scared_ , she brings up her arm like I haven’t seen it every day since I was born. I _get it,_ but the world isn’t as awful as she thinks it is!”  
  
Ara let out a deep sigh and grabbed her niece’s hand, squeezing it tightly just once. “You _don’t_ get it, kiddo. I know you want to think you do. I remember what that was like. And this isn’t me bullshitting you like I have all the answers but...the world is a lot more dangerous than you realize.”  
  
The older woman let go of the girl’s hand, extending her left arm out for her. She traced a thick faded line that curved along her forearm and drew her niece’s attention to it.  
  
“You see this?”  
  
“Yes,” Lana groaned, rolling her eyes.

“Don’t give me that shit, Lana, _look at it._ ”  
  
The girl glanced down to see the scar that she knew all too well. It was wide and a touch lighter than the rest of Ara’s skin and it was obvious from its appearance that it had once been extremely deep.  
  
“I almost lost this arm the same night your mom lost hers. Almost cut down to the bone, that’s how bad it was,” Ara explained. “And the only reason I’m not dead is because your moms and your grandmas were brave enough to stop that fucking machine. I can’t even begin to describe to you what it felt like.”  
  
Lana winced, a dull pain radiating up her left arm, another sensation she was certain her aunt was letting her feel--letting her guard down fully so the girl would understand.

“And your mom? She was brave--but she was overconfident too--and she paid for it, nearly with her life. Ikrie had to carry her to the infirmary while she almost bled to death. She’s worked so hard to make it like it’s no big deal which is _why_ you don’t think it is. But losing that arm? She lost part of herself that night, kiddo--the part that was foolish and cocky.”  
  
A pout formed on the girl’s face, still unwilling to acquiesce. “She still has a working arm, though! Vansa fixed it up, so I don’t know what she’s complaining about. It happened so long ago and it sounds like she recovered just fine.”  
  
Ara gritted her teeth, her brows furrowing in a way they never did in front of Lana.  
  
“She worked for _years_ to accept that part of her is now a machine. Do you have any idea how worried she was that she’d hurt you or Kal with it? She was _terrified_ of it from the moment she found out Ikrie was pregnant and even more so when she realized you were coming along. Aloy worked with her for _months_ to get her to even _think_ about daring to touch you with it--even Van herself had to try to convince her. And now _you_ get to decide that she’s just supposed to pretend like it was nothing? What you said really hurt her, Lana.”  
  
“How would you even know?” the auburn-haired girl retorted.  
  
“How do you think?” Ara replied, cocking an eyebrow while she tapped at her temple. “Unlike with you, I don’t have to be so close to her to feel it.”

Lana looked away, shame and embarrassment burning on her cheeks.  
  
“So you knew I was coming?”  
  
“I had an idea. Might have asked Van to go to the shop so we could have a moment.”

“Then why did you act like you didn’t know?” Lana asked, fiddling with the hem of her sleeve.  
  
“Because I wanted to hear it from you, first. Give you the benefit of the doubt.”  
  
The girl said nothing but stared down at the hardwood floor, avoiding her aunt’s gaze. The older redhead reached for Lana’s hand, once again, finding little resistance.  
  
“Your mom fucking loves you, Little Red. She’d die for you if it meant keeping you safe. She _nearly_ died for me and Van all those years ago and she barely knew us then! She’s not saying you can’t go because she wants to ruin your social life and make you look like a fool. She’s saying it _because_ she’s lived a hard life, Lana. And she has done everything possible to make sure you and your brother never had to. Her worst fear is that something bad happens to you like it did to us. Hell, it’s _my_ worst fear too.”

Lana frowned, blinking rapidly at Ara’s last admission, her lip beginning to quiver. “You sound like Mom right now.”  
  
“Good,” Ara said sincerely. “Then maybe being identical will pay off because if you won’t listen to it coming from her, maybe you’ll listen to it coming from me. Either way, the message doesn’t change.”  
  
The girl frowned, taking in the sight of her aunt’s features. She’d always considered Ara and her mother so different from one another, and now all she could see were the similarities: the same freckled cheeks, the same curve of their lips, the same laugh lines, and the same sharpness in their green-gold eyes.  
  
“Y-you’re only saying all this because you don’t want to start a fight with Mom,” Lana began, offering one last pitiful excuse for her aunt’s stern discipline. She had been _so_ certain Ara would take her side like she usually did. 

“Nah, this one’s all me, kiddo. Sorry to disappoint,” Ara said with a sad smile.

The older woman placed both of her hands on the girl’s shoulders, steadying Lana before she looked directly at her niece, her expression open and more raw than usual.  
  
“If...if you were mine--and let’s face it, I...I feel like you are--I wouldn’t let you go either. If this suddenly makes it so you hate me too, then so be it, Lana.”  
  
The girl winced, bracing for the impact of Ara’s disappointment and anger over her behavior, but instead Lana found only rolling, crashing, _unending_ waves of affection and concern from the older woman. The words _niece_ and _daughter_ seemed to mix and blend without distinction in her mind, causing her cheeks to burn even harder.  
  
Ara pulled Lana in tightly, holding her in place, neither one saying a word.  
  
\-------  
  
It was firmly night when Lana returned home, retracing her path through the city streets while gazing up at the stars above. She felt awful, the full weight of how she’d acted sinking into her stomach with every step, her mind turning over and over everything Ara had said.  
  
She reached the front door of her home, quietly inserting her key and turning the handle, attempting to be as stealthy as possible. She hoped that maybe if she was lucky enough she could avoid everyone and go straight to bed.  
  
The auburn-haired girl entered, taking off her boots as gingerly as possible before hearing a greeting from the living room.  
  
“Hey,” Kal said, looking up from the book in his hands, his legs extended across the couch while he read.  
  
“I’m going to bed,” Lana said flatly, not wanting to rehash the afternoon.  
  
“Lana--”  
  
“What, Kal? It’s late. I just want to sleep.”  
  
“Look, I don’t want to rub your face in it--” he began.  
  
“Of course you do--”  
  
Kal set the book down on his lap, his right hand raking through his dark hair.  
  
“Normally? Yeah. But...you really hurt Moms. Both of them.”  
  
A confused look spilled onto her face. “But I didn’t even talk to--”  
  
“And that’s why she’s upset. Well...that and the arm thing. Kinda heard about it when I got home.”  
  
Kal tucked his legs into a cross-legged position, giving space on the other side of the couch. Lana sighed, flopping unceremoniously onto the cushions, one arm draped across her eyes.  
  
“...am I a shitty daughter?”  
  
Kal paused thoughtfully for a moment, scratching at his chin where the tiniest amount of stubble had recently begun to form.  
  
“Not where it counts, but today? Maybe.”  
  
“Fuck...I just…”  
  
The boy waited, once again, before clearing his throat softly.  
  
“I don’t want to tell you what to do. Sun knows you never listen to me anyway, but...I think you need to apologize to her. Mom was crying when I came home. And you know she tries not to do that in front of us.”  
  
Lana kept her arm slung over her eyes, preventing her own tears from spilling.  
  
“Are they asleep?” she asked, her voice cracking slightly at the end.  
  
“No,” Kal said. “They went to Grandma and Nana’s place. They said I could come but I wanted to take advantage of the quiet for once.”

Lana rose from her seat, trying hard not to cry as she headed to the hallway. “I’ll leave you to it. Just um...if they get home and you’re still awake, let them know I came home. I’m going to bed.”  
  
“You’re not going to wait up?” Kal asked.  
  
“I kind of keep making everyone’s lives worse by being around,” Lana said. “Think I’ll spare them.”  
  
She turned and began padding toward her bedroom when she heard Kal call out.  
  
“Hey Lana?”  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“You don’t make my life worse.”

\------

Anukai arrived back after midnight, she and Ikrie entering their home quietly to find a small note stuck to the inside of the door:  
  
_“Moms--Lana wanted me to tell you she came home. I think she took whatever Aunt Ara said to her pretty hard. See you in the morning. - Kal.”_ _  
_ _  
_ “Looks like you were right about Ara,” Ikrie said softly as the two walked toward their bedroom.  
  
“I had a feeling,” Anukai smirked, pausing for a moment just outside Lana’s door. 

“You coming to bed?”  
  
“In a minute,” Anukai assured, kissing Ikrie’s cheek before letting her wife continue down the hallway.   
  
The older redhead gently tested the knob of her daughter’s door, trying to see if it was locked. It gave way easily and she entered, finding Lana asleep in bed, her only movement the soft up and down of her chest.  
  
Anukai stepped further in, making her way to sit at the edge of Lana’s bed. She looked down at the girl, and for a moment she seemed much younger than sixteen. The redhead could almost imagine her daughter was small once more, a swell forming beneath her ribs. 

She gently carded her fingers through auburn locks for several minutes before she felt Lana stir.  
  
“Mom?” she asked, her voice thick with sleep.

“I’m sorry I woke you.”  
  
“You don’t have to apologize for anything,” Lana said, her voice just above a whisper. “I’m the one who does.”  
  
“Sounds like you had quite the talk with your aunt.”  
  
Lana nodded, reaching for Anukai’s left hand and pressing the cool metal to her cheek. “I’m sorry for what I said.”

The feeling that seemed to push at Anukai’s ribs shifted, and suddenly it was pushing at Lana’s as well, the connection deep and familiar.  
  
“You know I love you, right?” the older redhead asked, her right hand tucking stray strands behind her daughter’s ear.  
  
“I know,” Lana said softly. “I just...had to be reminded of what that means.”  
  
“Sounds like Ara did a good job.”  
  
“She showed me that I’m lucky to have what I do and I...I felt it.”  
  
“Felt what?” Anukai asked gently.  
  
“How she...feels about me.”  
  
“Pretty intense, right?”  
  
Lana nodded. “You know?”  
  
Anukai chuckled to herself. “Of course I know. She’s felt like that about you since before you were born.”  
  
“It made me realize...if that’s how she feels, then you must…”  
  
“Yeah,” Anukai nodded with amusement. “It’s like that.”  
  
Lana smiled to herself. “Could...you show me?”  
  
“I could try,” Anukai admitted. “But if it gets too overwhelming, tell me, okay?”  
  
The girl nodded and Anukai scooted over, leaning down next to her. She concentrated for several minutes, trying to focus on the sensation of letting her guard down while she continued to play with Lana’s hair, letting everything she had rise to the surface. Every memory, every minute she’d worried over the girl, every time she’d felt proud, every time she was scared Lana might be hurt, every ounce of herself flowed across them both, consuming and powerful.  
  
After several long moments of silence, the redhead glanced down to find her daughter already fast asleep, a wide smile spreading across her face. A feeling of warmth and safety began to pour forth from her daughter, flooding through Anukai’s core in a way that hadn’t happened since…  
  
The older woman carefully scooted back out of the bed, rising to her feet slowly before she bent over and kissed the side of the girl’s head.  
  
“I love you, Lani.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so with that, our "little, couple-chapter" collab project's 31st and final chapter comes to a close. We weren't kidding when we said this was originally about 12-15 chapters, but we just couldn't help ourselves. It's been such a fun ride for us, but we aren't exactly done with this little world that's been established.
> 
> Next week, the next story in the _Lineage_ of this little family begins, and something wicked this way comes...


End file.
